Shout out to Dallas, y'all are, shout out to Miss Stephanie Carter, first lady of the house.This is actually the location and the city of the first glory.And so it feels, it feels special to be back here in particular.Tonight, I want to deal with the subject of suffering.And I want to deal with the subject of suffering because it's a common and universal experience for all people.Whether you're a Christian or not a Christian, suffering will come your way, right?But I don't think it takes much thought to see how much suffering is the reason either people stay or people leave God.Suffering either sanctifies or suffering either pulls people in a direction where they want the world because that suffering seems easier.And so I want to talk through a text.It's a text that involves this concept of suffering, but exalts the presence and the purposes of God in the midst of it.It's a text that a lot of people don't touch.It's a text I ain't even want to touch.But I'm glad that I did.Before we go there, I just want to talk about a young boy named Christopher Ward Jr.You probably have never heard his name.Christopher is not a podcaster.Christopher is not an influencer.Christopher is not a basketball player or a painter.Christopher is not a musician.He doesn't have any visible or public notoriety.Christopher is just a 12-year-old boy who, since the day he was born, he could not see.Because Christopher was born blind from birth, it has affected every inch of his life.He cannot watch cartoons like the regular kids.He cannot go outside and play like the regular kids.He cannot interact with people.Even his family.His family dynamic is affected by his inability to see them.He lives with his mother.He's loved by his mother.Nurtured by his mother.But he's never seen his mother's face.Until one day, Christopher and his mother travel to Washington, D.C.To try out this device called E-Sight.Simply put, E-Sight is a device that, if you're a child, you're not going to be able to use.But
once you put it over a person who is blind's eyes, they are able to see the world digitally.Christopher is in the room with his mom.It's on YouTube.Y'all can Google it.He's in the room with his mom.And the doctor comes up behind his chair and puts the device on his eyes.And Christopher starts to kind of survey the environment.He looks to the left.And he's like, oh, that's a wall.That's not interesting.And he looks up.And he looks to the right.And he finally lands on his mama's face.And the first thing out of this 12-year-old boy's mouth is, oh, mommy, there you are.You're so beautiful.In the moment, his mama starts to weep, any parent would, because she's probably spent so much time praying for her son.Being with her son.Grieving for her son.That now she's reminded of the loss that she's had.By the very fact that she's had a son that has never seen her face.This story between Christopher and his mother shows us that it is one thing to be able to see.It is a whole other thing to be seen.In the text before us, we have a woman who is treated as invisible.She is talked about but not talked to.She is called by her usefulness and never by her name.She is used and abused.Until one day, she finds herself next to a spring of water.Spring being the Hebrew word for eye.And next to the eye, this unseen woman is finally seen.Lord, I pray for your word.I pray that you would illuminate it so that we can understand it.And I pray that you would empower us to see you first and foremost.But that you would help us to see how we can live in light of what we see.We pray that you would minister to your people.Help me to have humility.Humility, love, and clarity.We pray all this in your name.Amen.Turn in your Bibles to Genesis chapter 16.Who brought like real Bibles with them?Look at y'all.Y'all better.Genesis chapter 16 verse 1.Say amen when you got it.Now Sarai, Abram's wife, had borne him no children.She had a female Egyptian servant whose name was Hagar.And Sarai said to Abram, behold
now, the Lord has prevented me from bearing children.Go into my servant, it may be that I shall obtain children by her.And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai.So after Abram had lived ten years in the land of Canaan,Sarai, Abram's wife, took Hagar the Egyptian, her servant, and gave her to Abram, her husband, as a wife.And he went into Hagar.And she conceived.And when she saw that she had conceived, she looked with contempt on her mistress.And Sarai said to Abram, may the wrong done to me be on you.I gave my servant to your embrace.And when she saw that she had conceived, she looked on me with contempt.May the Lord judge between you and me.But Abram said to Sarai, behold, your servant is in your power.Do to her as you please.And Sarai dealt harshly with her.And she fled from her.The angel of the Lord found her by a spring of water in the wilderness,the spring on the way to Shur.And he said, Hagar, servant of Sarai, where have you come from?And where are you going?She said, I am fleeing from my mistress Sarai.The angel of the Lord said to her, return to your mistress and submit to her.The angel of the Lord also said to her, I will surely multiply your offspring so that they cannot be numbered for multitude.And the angel of the Lord said to her, behold, you are pregnant and shall bear a son.You shall call his name Ishmael because the Lord has listened to your affliction.He shall be a wild donkey of a man, his hand against everyone and everyone's hand against him.And he shall dwell over against all his kinsmen.So she called the name of the Lord who spoke to her.You are a God of seeing.For she said, truly here.I have seen him who looks after me.This text immediately begins by telling us that there is a problem.Moses, the writer of this narrative, doesn't beat around the bush.I thought it was clever, but he gets straight to the point by establishing the problemand the predicament that drives the way this narrative plays out.Which is that Sarai, Abram's wife, hasn't
given him any babies.That might not seem like a problem for some of us.Children ain't on everybody's agenda.There are some saints that had an IUD stuck up in there for about eight years now.And those kinds of people would read this text and see that Sarai ain't got babiesand see nothing wrong with the narrative.Wouldn't even be able to discern the intent of the author.Sarai's childlessness is only understood as problematic when you read four chapters before this one.In Genesis 12, God calls Abram out of his country and tells him that he's going to make him a nation.To have a nation, you need people.To have people, you need pregnancy.In Genesis 15, God tells Abram that he's going to give him a son.To have a son, you need a woman who will conceive, carry, and deliver this son into the world.But now, in our text, in Genesis 16, Moses tells us that there is a woman and she has a name.Her name is Sarai, but there is a problem.This woman, this Sarai, has not conceived and has not carried and has not delivered a son or any babies into the world.So automatically, creating the idea that now God's promise to Abram is being threatened.And not by her body, or not by the flesh, or not by sin, or not by the devil, but by Sarai's own infertility.There are social and internal implications for being an infertile woman in this world.As many of you could affirm, there is an internal shame where you tell yourself things like,I am not woman enough.I am not wife enough.I am not good enough.Because I remain childless.There is external shame that we definitely experience if you are a part of religious institutions.Where people will say, you obviously aren't praying enough.Or fasting enough.It's like the prosperity gospel for mothers.It's like, you aren't doing all of the rituals and all of the things that you should be doing.That's why you remain childless.Putting the burden of barrenness on the woman, instead of on the Lord who opens and closes the womb.And Sarai...Sarai felt this.The
women in Sarai's day had to carry intense shame from the community when they could not bear children.In some instances, not being able to conceive was actually cause for divorce.And therefore, what some women had at stake for being childless was not just the loss of social status,but future security.So I think in Sarai's mind, what is being threatened by her childlessnessisn't just God's promise to Abram, but Sarai's own stability.So because of that, like most of us, she has to think through a strategy to fix this issue.Look at verse 1 and 2.She had a female Egyptian servant whose name was Hagar.And Sarai said to Abram, behold now.You understand how dramatic that is.Behold now.I'm going to go home tomorrow and say, Preston, behold now.These dishes.So triumphant.Behold now.Like it's a prophetic word.It's not.Behold now.The Lord has prevented me from bearing children.Go into my servant.It may be that I shall obtain children by her.I want to bring our attention to something about Sarai's conversation with Abram.Sarai has a right theology about the sovereign creativity of God.She says, the Lord has prevented me from bearing children.She understands that the body is not ultimately the source of conception God is.When I was reading a book while studying for this passage, it said that when women get pregnant,when women have babies, it's as if Genesis 1 and 2 is being replicated in the body.It's basically to say anytime you see pregnancy, God did it.Anytime you see a baby, God did it.But here's the catch.Here's the catch.For some of us, that makes us want to praise.For some of us, that's actually discouraging.For the people who have been trying to get pregnant, women who have been praying, women who have been fasting,women who have tried IVF, have done all the spiritual and medical methods in the hopes that one day something will change.So for me to then say that the reason that they are grieving to the degree that they are is because of God, that doesn't feel good.I
acknowledge how that might land on you.And so in light of that reality,I want to lift up this really big word in the text that we might have missed.And I think that defining the word won't necessarily take away the pain of infertility.But I do think it can cultivate hope in God.The word is in verse 2.I'll read it again and add an inflection on it.And Sarai said to Abram,Behold now, the Lord has prevented me from bearing children.Sarai, I love the Bible.Sarai doesn't say God, Elohim, prevented me from bearing children.Which would have been true.God as God means that he is the source.He is the creator of all things.Genesis 1-1, in the beginning, God, Elohim, created the heavens and the earth.But that's not the word she uses.She says, the Lord prevented me from bearing children.Which is the covenantal name of God that we just got done singing, Yahweh.In Exodus 33, Moses asked God,To see his glory.You remember.And the text says that the Lord proclaimed his name.Meaning, he preached about himself.And what did God say his name meant?He said, the Lord, the Lord.A God merciful and gracious.Slow to anger.And abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.The point I'm trying to make is that the nature of God,as revealed in the name of God,informs the restrictions of God.I'll say it again.The nature of God.As revealed in the name of God, informs the restrictions of God.Meaning, God's name explains his no.If the Lord says no.If the Lord says not yet.If the Lord says keep waiting.If the Lord says maybe later.Even if it doesn't make sense.His name has not changed.Neither has his nature.So even if it hurts, it doesn't mean he's not still being good.Sarai calls God.By the right name.And yet we will see that her behavior doesn't match her theology.Look at the end of verse 2.Behold now, the Lord has prevented me from bearing children.Go into my servant.It may be that I shall obtain children by her.You see a whole sentence of the Bible can preach.The words may be are intriguing to
me.Because she just said that it's not.It's the Lord who has prevented her from having a child.Which implies that it is the Lord who can give her one.So I can see if she was like God has kept me from having children.We should pray.We should fast.We should go to church and ask the believers to lay hands on us with oil.Since it may be that I will obtain a child by him.But she says it may be that I will obtain children by her.Misplaced hope will get you into all kinds of.She is placing her faith and her expectation on somebody that cannot even create people in your body.She knows God's name.She just said it.But the confession of his name still doesn't trigger any faith.She figured there had to be other strategies.There had to be other possibilities for her to get this baby.Because the Lord isn't moving quick enough.It's crazy how impatient has us do some of the mindless things.He promised.He promised Abram a child ten years ago.And the baby ain't here yet.So it's time to take conception into our own hands.It's kind of like when the husband ain't showed up yet.When the husband ain't showed up yet.And we start to take, you know, the wife thing into our own hands.We try to come up with strategies.And we try to think through ways to get the man that we want.We start to do what the world is doing.Because it obviously is working for them.And so we start to say things like modesty.Modesty don't work no more.That's patriarchy.That ain't Bible.And so let me show a little thigh-thigh.Uh-huh.Uh-huh.A little chest-chest.Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.A little butt-butt.Uh-huh.We even start to consider the idea of being with men that don't even like your God.He might like gospel, you know.He listening to Jonathan McReynolds and Maverick City, Jireh.Like, do you understand how crazy that is?For you to be so unconvinced of God's goodness as it relates to his timing in your life.That you would be willing to submit yourself to somebody that serves the devil.That's crazy.That is.Because what's
happening is,is that some of the strategies that we construct are a means of expediting the process of God's promise.We don't like endurance.We don't like waiting.We don't like, but what if God is doing something in you in the waiting?Surely, surely he knows better than you or do you think you know better than him?Is that what it is?Is that what it is?Is that you somehow presume that you know what God,like you know better than the Lord,like you know better than any other kind of host?It can't be that's what we believe.But maybe God has you waiting so you'll see that that's what's been in your heart this entire time.Sometimes God has to make you wait so you can see what's in here.The thing is, we can sing the songs.We can go to the conferences.We can do the devotionals.We can know Leviticus and Habakkuk.Don't nobody read Habakkuk.I don't even know how many chapters are in Habakkuk.But we can know God's name.And still doubt his nature.If God was the source of Sarai's hope,then she should have petitioned himlight of the promise that he already made.The strategy Sarai puts into placeis that she will turn her Egyptian servant into a concubineslash wife for Abramso that she can function as a surrogate mother,meaning the child produced from Hagar and Abram's unionwould legally be Sarai's child.And I want to briefly note that when Sarai says,it may be that I will obtain children by her,in the English you can't read what's actually being said.The Hebrew reads, it may be that I will be built up by her.Which is to say that in Sarai's view is not just a baby,but also having the stability and the securityand the security that comes like a house with having children.So I have to reiterate that because it means that in Sarai's mindit isn't just that she's asking for a child,she's asking for status.And how does Abram respond?He is described as doing exactly what Adam did in Genesis 3.It's the same language.Abram, Adam, listened to the voice of his wife,meaning the word sin isn't
in the text,but this is a textual clue that sin is in the room.Look at verse 3.So, after Abram had lived there,10 years in the land of Canaan,Sarai, Abram's wife, took Hagar the Egyptian, her servant,and gave her to Abram, her husband, as a wife,and he went into Hagar, and she conceived.We are introduced to Hagar in verses 1 and 3,and we are given a description of Hagar.We learn who she is ethnically, which is that she is an Egyptian,and we learn who she is socially, which is that she is a slave.So she is a subjugated foreigner.To be clear, because we have people of African descent,in the room, we have to acknowledge that the word slave triggers us,so much to the point that sometimes we can read our heritage into the narrative.And so I have to acknowledge that the kind of slaverythat is happening in this text is not pre-Civil War chattel slavery.Now, this is Old Testament slavery,but that isn't also to say that it was less egregiousthan New Testament or pre-Civil War chattel slavery.Like, having a human being be a slave automatically is top-tier sinful.It don't matter what culture it's happening in.So I just wanted to make a distinction there.Now, with that said, the question must be asked,how does a woman in Canaan acquire a slave from Egypt?Turn in your Bibles to Genesis chapter 12.I love hearing the pages.I remember when I used to go to church with my mama,I would be so embarrassed when they would say, you know,turn to John 2, and I'm like, I just, I don't know where that is, sir.But that's okay.Verse 10, say amen when you got it.Now, there was a famine in the land,so Abram went down to Egypt to sojourn there,for the famine was severe in the land.When he was about to enter Egypt, he said to Sarai, his wife,I know that you are a woman beautiful in appearance,and when the Egyptians see you, they will say, this is his wife.Then they will kill me.You understand how dramatic that is?Huh?It's like when men, when they got a cold,and they act like it's COVID,it's like
you realize I had a whole human in my body,and I didn't even complain this much.It's all right.Verse 13, say you are my sister,that it may go well with me because of you,and that my life may be spared for your sake.Interesting.When Abram entered Egypt,the Egyptians saw that the woman was very beautiful.And when the princes of Pharaoh saw her,they praised her to Pharaoh.And the woman was taken to Pharaoh's house.And for her sake, he dealt well with Abram.And he had sheep, oxen, male donkeys, male servants,female servants, female donkeys, and camels.Let's back up.A famine happens.Abram decides to go to Egypt to escape.He comes up with a strategy for how to secure his life,which is to have his wife saythat she is his sister.They go to Egypt.They recognize Sarai's beauty,and they take her, take her, take her into Pharaoh's house.Mind you, she is not taken into Pharaoh's houseto say what's up real quick.She's not taken in there to get some of y'all dry spaghetti.That's not what she's doing.Just put more sauce on it.And put the meat in the sauce.I'm getting distracted.She's not taken into Pharaoh's house.This is not friendliness.This is not love.She is taken into Pharaoh's houseand taken into a house.She is taken into a harem.That she is taken as a womanwho is about to be Pharaoh's concubine.Let me say it again.She is taken into a haremand made to be a concubineof a foreign man.Which sounds very familiar to me.Now in exchange for Sarai,Pharaoh gives Abram some gifts.Some of which are female servants.And it's most likely at this pointthat Hagar enters into the lifeof Sarai and Abram.Now coming back to Genesis 16,trying to round it out, remember the predicament.Sarai hasn't born Abram any children.So she takes Hagarand gives her to Abramas a wife slash concubineas a strategy to secure her own life.It ended up being God,not even Abram, that eventuallyrescues Sarai out of Pharaoh's house.And so you think from that experience.You think from that oppression.You think that
everything that she went throughthat she would have a particular empathy for Hagar.But she doesn't.Sarai, even though she knowswhat it feels like for someoneto see your body as a resourceor a tool for their own security.Because she even experienced that,it doesn't matter because the strategythe strategy she has in mindis one she developedfrom what she's been through.So Sarai decides to do exactly to Hagarwhat Abram did to her.How oftenhow often do you find yourselfreplicating old patternswith new people?Where the thingsyou've been through,the circumstances you've endured,the things that have negativelyshaped you have more influenceon how you navigate difficultythan the spirit of God and his scriptures.Trauma is a real thingbut I thinkthe trauma obsessionof our cultureis making us more victim mindedthan we're able to see.Suffering is a part of lifebut therethere are times when what we've been throughbecomes the model for how we behave.Lately, I've beenwondering and processing this myselfI've been wondering if I have so identifiedwith my trauma that I've accidentallystopped identifying with Christ.LikeI thinkGod is helping me, I think somewhere inside of meI don't be believingI'm a new creature all the time.Because I keep reaching into historyand asking the old Jackieand all of her strategies to show upfor meas if the new Jackie, the new creaturedoesn't have access to all the resourcesshe actually needs to overcome.What if Sarai rememberedthat God didn't need her powerto bring about his promise.God didn't need her strategiesGod doesn't need your manipulationto move mountains. I know that workedwhen you were in the worldbut you don't need that in the kingdom.God doesn't even need your guard.Some of us have guards up because we thinkwe are a better refuge than God.God doesn't need your guard to keep you from pain.All he requires is trust.All he requiresis trust.Abram listensto the voice of his wife.He goes into Hagarand she conceives.I need you to noticehow at no point
in this narrativedoes anybodyactually involve Hagarin conversations about Hagar.Nobody asked herif she wanted to marry Abram.Nobody asked herif she wanted to have sex with Abram.I know he's the father of many nationsbut he's 90.Nobody Hagardo you want to carry his baby?Hagarwhen you get pregnant with the babyand you carry the babyfor 40 weeksand you go through laborwithout any medicinewill you let ustake your baby and give it tothey don't even sayHagar's name.The only reason you even know her nameis because Moses says it.When Abram and Saraiwhen they refer to herthey only refer to her position.She is a servant and she is a slave.The woman with a name that nobodysays thoughhas a human and therefore visceralresponse to her conceiving.Look at verse 4.When Sarai sawthat she had conceivedshe looked with contempton her mistress.Contempt means to take lightly.It's the same word we see usedin 2 Samuel when David was dancingby the ark and everythingand the text says when his wifelooked out the windowshe despised him, had contemptfor him in her heart.It paints the picture that Sarah'sposition might have been elevatedor there might have been some respect, some reverencebecause this is what Sarah didthat I don't think she knew she was finna do.You made your slavea wifeand she is now not onlya wife but she's a wifethat's pregnant with the baby that youwant and so nowwhat you have given Hagaris power. This is a very messysituation, don't know if you've noticed.That could have been avoidedif somebody didn't try to strategize their wayaround God's will. So Saraipulls Abram to the sideto fix the mess that they both put themselvesinto in verse 5 and the wayAbram decides to remedy the tensionis that he restores Sarai's completeauthority over Hagar. It seemsthat when she was given as a wifeSarai's authority was a bit limited. She didn'thave 100% authority but nowHagar, Abram gives Saraitoo many names, Abramgives Hagar backto Sarai which means that she is nowno longer a wife, no
longera concubine but she is again a slave.Now I need you to seethis, he gives Saraithe liberty, he says it in the textto do to heras she pleases.Again, the Englishdon't really give you the whole thrust of the Hebrew.In the Hebrew it saysdo to her what is goodin your eyes. If youknow anything about the Old Testamentif you done read through Judges onceyou know that anytime itsays and they did what was rightin their own eyes, what they doeverything, everything wrongnever right and that'swhat happens in this narrative.The text says that Saraidealt harshly with Hagarmeaning she abused herwhether it was verbal abusephysical abuse, emotionalabuse or harsh laborthe text doesn't say butwe do know that whatever it wasit was too much for Hagar to take so shedoes what any human being doeswho is made in the image of God when they aredishonored and being disrespectedshe flees. Look at verseseven. The angel of the Lordfound her by aspring of water in the wildernessthe spring on the way toShur and he said Hagarservant of Saraiwhere have you come fromand where are you going?She said I amfleeing from my mistress Saraithe angel of the Lordthe Lord said to herreturn to your mistressand submit to her.The first timeHagar is called by her nameand invited into aconversation is whenthe angel of the Lord does itfinally somebodyasked Hagarabout Hagarhe finds her at a spring on the wayto Shur. Shur is aplace that you pass through on the way to Egyptso that means that Hagarhas a location in mindwhich is her native country which is simply tosay Hagar wants to go homeI love the questionthat the angel of the Lord askedhe said Hagarservant of Saraiwhere have you come fromand where are yougoing? AnytimeGod asks usa question it is neverbeneficial for himhe knows everythingso thesupposed curiosity ofGod is either functioningas a test oract of revelation. To Adamhe said where are you?To answer the question Adamwould have had to confess where he wasand why he was there meaning Godasked him the
question to create spacefor confession. To CainGod said where isAbel your brother? To the disciples he saidwhere are we to get bread? To Peter he saiddo you love me? God knowsthe answer toevery question he asks usso if ever he does it I need youto know that the answer you giveain't never for him it's alwaysfor you. thing about thisexchange is it showshow God wants to engagewith us in sufferingso much so that the all knowing Godlike we don't even like ask the people questionswhen we think we know it allbut God is willingto ask a question that healready knows the answer to just to invitethis unseen woman intoconversations with himselfyou might have noticed that I began bycalling the person that Hagar is speaking tothe angel of the Lord as the text doesand then just now I just attributed theconversation to God and that's becauseevery time you see the word angel in scriptureI need you to not assumethat it means created being with a big bellyand some wings or somethingthat's Disney Channel that's not BibleAngelall it means is messengerso the context of the passage showsus what kind of messenger we're dealingwith. The context of this passageis that in verse 13 it says so she called thename of the Lordwho spoke to herthis means that this beingis not merely an angelthis is not the seraphimthat Isaiah saw in Isaiah 6who were aroundGod's throne with wings over theireyes and wings over their bodies andwings over their feet saying holy holyholy is the Lord of hosts it's notthem it's him the oneon the throne who is nowbecoming what the Bible callstheologians call a theophanyhe is a temporary manifestationof the person of God and he's revealinghimself to a slave womannamed Hagar the angel of theLord asks Hagarwhere are you goingshe answers it and saysno where you come from where you comefrom she says I'm fleeing from mymistress Sarai she doesn'tknow the answer to the second questionbut God does he tellsher the place she is goingis that she is going to return to hermistress and
submitthis textused to make me feel a waybecause I don't know if y'all been walking through itwith me Hagar raninto the wilderness toescape abuse andGod is sending her back there's allkinds of questions that come up when youget to passages like thisand smallnote small note itis helpful toallow Jesus to determinethe nature of Godand read what Jesus says aboutGod into text that seem to makeGod seem less than God let me explainin JohnNicodemus or the rich young rulercomes to Jesus and said hey how canI get eternal life he calls him good teacherand Jesus says why do you call me goodonly God is good which means that when Iget to text that make me question God'sgoodness I need to refer back to Jesus and what didhe say God was and therefore if Jesussays that God is good if Jesus istelling the truth and he is then that means I need topresuppose goodness into every textand if I presuppose goodness I will findit just a small notethere's all kinds of questionsthat come upwhen we think about this moment we sayto ourselves why would God do something like thatdoes likewhy would he allow her to escapedoesn't God know shewas being abused doesn't God knowshe was being that she was suffering doesn'tGod know that Sarai was dealing with her harshlywhy does he even careand one way peoplehave attempted to make sense of Godsending Hagar back to Sarai is that they will saythat God was making provisionfor Hagar's life there's about300 miles between Canaan andEgypt and so rightly so if she waspregnant even when I was walking two inches and pregnantI felt like I was going to die and so300 milesbetween Canaan and Egypt is a lotright there's thestrong possibility that she would nothave made it I thinkthat's a potential argumentbut it doesn't persuade mebecause Israel journeyed from Egyptto Canaansame path over 40 yearsand they did notdie because they ran out of foodthey did not diebecause they ran out of clothesthey did not die because of the difficultyof the journey the only reason theydied
on the same path was because theydisobeyed God so that tells methat if God can keepIsrael on the way out ofEgypt into Canaan then God could havekept her on the way out of Canaan intoEgypt I thinkthe answer to our concernsis a bit more simplethan we are willing to embracewhich is that sometimesGod providentiallyallows us to sufferGod providentiallyallows usto suffer I'm notignorant to thediversity of pain in this rooma room of womenguarantees that therewill be people who have sufferedwomen who have been abandoned by people they lovewomen who have been sexuallyverballyand emotionally abusedwomen who have miscarriedonce or more than oncewomen who have had abortionsand women who are thinking about onewomen who carry so much shamefrom the decisions that they've madewomen who have been diagnosedwith cancer and women who willbe who will one dayreceive a diagnosis that God may healor God may notI say that becauseI know that you know sufferingbut in this moment myprimary concernis not the universalexperience of sufferingmy primary concern is how yourvision of God is being affected by itabout 10 years agoI read this book called Nightby Eli Wieselit's a memoir about his timein the Auschwitz concentration campand he describes this scenethat has never left mesince I read itand he talks about how the Nazi partythe Gestapo they cleared out the ghettosand they put all the Jews on trainsand they don't have anyclarityfully of where they're goingthey have an idea thatthey're going to a worker campbut they don't know the depravitythat is awaiting themthey don't know the complete wickednessof the Nazi partyand the concentration camps that they constructedto murder all of these peopleso he gets on the trainthey're on it for a long timehe's with his family and they get off the trainand there's chaos and people are being separatedby age and by abilityand his mother and his sister go one wayand he never sees them again for the rest of his lifeand him and his father go another wayand in the
middle of the chaoshe sees smokeand he doesn't understandwhere the smoke is coming fromso he traces the smoke to his sourceand he sees that it's a roomwhere the sickand the elderlyand babiesare being led into the roomand being burned aliveis the result of their burned bodiesand it's after that scenethat he writes thisnever shall I forgetthat nightthe first night in campthat turned my life into one long nightseven times sealednever shall I forget that smokenever shall I forget the small facesof the children whose bodies I sawtransformed into smokeunder a silent skynever shall I forget those flamesthat consumed my faith forevernever shall I forget the nocturnal silencethat deprived me for all eternityof the desire to livenever shall I forget those momentsthat murdered my Godand my souland turned my dreamsto ashessufferingcreated a lens for Elithat changedthe way he viewed Godthe intensity of his painmade him a man thatto the day of his death he did not believe that God existedand I thinksuffering in different degreesdoes the same thing for usit becomes the way we interpret Godour suffering becomes a hermeneutical toolwhere we interpret Godthrough what we've been throughinstead of what Jesus has revealedand we end upour suffering can sometimes be so intensethat we become our own false teacherswe begin to say things about Godthat the apostles would not affirmwe begin to say things like he's not goodhe doesn't love mehe doesn't talk about Godlike he is something other than holybut as ChristiansI get the tensionthe tension of having to deal withthe sovereigntythe fact that God has controlover everythinglike the sovereignty of God and sufferingthat's a tensionthat we have to reckon withI've had to deal with it myselflike when I think about how my mothershe would often drop me off ata family friend's houseand she was dropping me offbecause she had to go to workand I was fiveshe didn't knowwhat was on the other sideof the door but God didlike she didn't know thatthe nephew
of her friendhad a spirit of perversionshe didn't know thatshe didn't know thathe had intentions for my bodythat came straight from hellshe didn't know that and God didn't tell herhe didn't give her a dreamhe didn't send her a wordand he could havehe could have given her a warningto keep me out ofbut he didn'the let her drop me off with the assumptionthat her baby would be safeand he knewthat what the teenage boy would do to mewould change my entire lifehe knew that when he used my bodyto satisfy his lusthe knew that it would affecteverything about who I amhow I see myself as a motheras a friendhow I handle and understand affectionthe way I view sexualityeven the difficulties in touching peoplesometimes and not feeling safe in your own bodyhe knew that would happenand he did nothinghe did nothingbut the only wayI've chosen to make sense of it allis not by understanding Godthrough the lens of my circumstancesbut understanding Godthrough the thing that happened on the crossbecause on the crosshe is that God's sonsuffers toohe, the Lord of Lordsis verbally abusedhe, the King of Kingsis also mobbedhe, the one who created the heavens and the earthis shamed and humiliatedand his bodyhis body is nailed to a treewhere he hangs naked for hoursmeaning his suffering wasn't even quickwe complain about the duration of our sufferingbut imagine being Godthe one who created timesubmitted to the sufferinghistorians sayhistorians say that to speakof a crucifixionis to speak of a slave's deaththat tells me that the son of Goddecided, chose, willed himselfto submit to a slave's deathand this is the kingthis is the God of glorythis is the one who created heavens and earththis is the one who was sitting on the thronewhere the angels were goingthis is the one who did not just staylike a theophany, he didn't just staya temporary image in front of Hagarhe became a human beingto suffer and dielike a slave and while he was therewhile he was there the one who knew no sinbecame sin so that we
couldbecome the righteousness of Godwhich means because he took my sin on himselfthe father saw him and judged himhe judged himand Jesus saidmy Godmy God, why have you forsaken meI understand sinnersI understand the wickedI understand they should be forsakenbut me, your son, the holy onethe righteous one, the good oneyou forsaken meGod asked God a questionand this timethey both knew the answerwhich was loveGod so loved the worldthat he gave his only begotten sonthat whoeverwould believe in himwould have eternal lifethat means that suffering is redemptivein Jesus' nameI understand what's happening hereit means that because Christ diedand because Christ roseit means that sufferingdoes not have the power to keep me from Godeven if my sin cannot keep me from Godbecause of what Jesus didhow be it my sufferingcannot keep me from Godthat means every difficult thingyou have had to endurebecause of your humanitybecause of your genderbecause of your sizebecause of your weakness cannot determine how God feels about youdo you want to understand God's natureyou want to understand God's naturelook at the crossyou want to know what God thinks about evildo you see what he did to his sonlook at the crossdo you want to understandwhy bad things happen to good peoplethat actually only happenone timeat the crossthe thing that makes Genesis 16make senseI ain't telling Hagar to do nothingthat he wasn't going to come and do himselfanybody understandswhat it's like to submit to sufferingJesus doesverse 10the angel of the Lord also said to herI will surely multiply your offspringso that they cannot be numbered for multitudeand the angel of the Lord said to herbehold you are pregnantand shall bear a sonyou shall call his name Ishmaelbecause the Lord has listenedto your afflictionthe Lord tells Hagar to go backand to submit to Saraiand I have to say this as a caveatpleasedo not readhow God is dealing withSaraiand think that that means that God is calling youto submit to abusethere is a
differencebetween descriptivetext and prescriptivetextthis is how God is dealing withHagar so do not let a pastordo not let a leaderuse this textto tell you to submitto sufferingGod is a just Godwho cares about your lifeso if you are in dangerthis text is not telling you to stay theredo you understand what I'm sayingokaythe Lord tells Hagar to go backand to submit to Saraibut the beauty of this passageI love that the Lord led us to teach this passagebecause I think it redeems his naturehe doesn't send her backempty handedhe sends her back with promisesand some assuranceI hope you are okay with walking through the textGod promised herwhat is very similar languageto his promise to Abram in Genesis 12which is that he will giveshe will not just give birth to a sonbut she will give birth to a nationthe Ishmaelitesif children if a childwere the means by which a woman was built upwere the means by which a woman had securityand status and stabilityif one child did thatimagine what God is sayingshe'll have with a nationhe is promising herultimate securityand ultimate stabilitythrough the son she didn't even ask God forshe's also promisedthat her son will be a wild donkey of a mannowwhen I was pregnant with my sonand one of y'all prophesiedthat he would be a wild donkey of a manbecause it's givenyou think he gonna be uglybecause whyI don't think I've ever seen a cute donkey in my lifebecause why he gotta be a donkeywhy not an eagleeagles are majestic and they flyhe can have visionthat means he's a leaderbutwhat God is promisingis that he will be like a stallionmeaning he will be freehe will be antagonisticthis nation will come against Israelin the future which is another consequenceof Sarai's sinbut he also will still be a man who is freemeaning he will not be a servant or slaveto anyone like his mother has had to beHagar is also given assuranceIshmael's nameservesas a reminderof God's awareness of Hagardo you know what his name meanshis name means Godhearsthe text says
ityou shall call his name Ishmaelbecause the Lord has listened to your afflictionI wish some of us were like the Hebrewsnaming our children things that ministeryou know our mamas was naming us Brittanyand Jasmineand AshleyI know they got meanings it just don't hit the samehere's the Africans they got the godliest names in the worldtheir names be meaning likethe Lord rose from the dead on the third dayhallelujaham I lying I'm not lyingyou shall call his name Ishmaelbecause the Lordhas listened to your afflictionlisten to yourit's as ifsuffering has a soundbecause there's no mention of Hagarpraying for deliverance anywhere in the textwhich isn't to say that she didbut what if she didn't and God still heard her anywaywhat if God is teaching usthat there are times when your sufferingis so deep so visceralso present so enduringthat you don't have sentencesor verbs or pronounsor adjectivesyou don't have syntax for what you're going throughbut God still responds anywaywhat did God say to Mosesbefore he delivered Israel out of Egyptdo you remember he saysI have surely seen the afflictionof my people I have heardtheir cry and I knowtheir sufferings which means that God is aliving being who has the abilityto take your pain personalso when we say that God seesyou we mean morethan God has the ability to havesight when we say that Godhears you we mean morethan God has the ability to recognizesound ways what we're saying is that God is not anidol he's not deafhe can actually move he can actuallythink he can actually speak he canactually respond and therefore move towards youand be actively engaged in everythingthat's happening with you does this make senseGod sees youand God hears youGod seeing youand hearing you and being alivedoes not mean thatcircumstances will be easywhat it means is thatthe hard things are not keeping you from theliving Godhe is still a verypresent help in timesnot just prosperity intimes of troubleI'm almost close I imaginethat the meaning of Ishmael's
name alsofunctioned not just as an assuranceand as a blessing and as like you knowlike good news for Hagarit also functioned as awarning to Abram and Saraiwarning Jackiewhat do you mean I'll explainI like explainingif God hearssufferingsurely God hears sin tooso imagine it if you canevery time this littleboy runs around the houseand they say his name they arepreaching about the nature of GodGod hears get off the stepsGod hears stop messing with theblinds God hears stoppulling the dog's tailthey have to constantlybe reminded that Godis very much aware of how y'all treat herin this house how does all this landon Hagar look at verse13 so she calledthe nameof the Lord who spoke to heryou area God ofseeing for she said trulyhere I have seen himwho looks after me earlier I mentionedhow this text makes me feelor used to make me feel some type of way and what's funnyis I think sometimes when we're reading narratives that makeus feel a little weird we should probablypay attention to how the peoplein the narrative actually respond to what's happeningand maybe be influencedby how they're respondinglike she doesn't respond to Godsending her back with contemptshe doesn't respond with Godsending her back even with confusionshe responds with praise shesays you are the Godof seeingwe have two things happening hereHagar names God Elroynot Elroy like the one who changesyour tires with the thickcalloused hands that look likePolish sausages not himElroyE-L spaceR-O-Iwhich means Godof seeing I wantthat to meditate in your spirit a bitthat God can see there's a dualmeaning to her praise Hagar is praisingGod for seeing herand she is equally reflecting on the factthat she has seen him becauseit's a well known fact in the scripturesthat no one shall see Godand live and it ain't even like she'sAbram she ain't the fatherof many nationsit ain't even like she's Isaacor Jacobthrough whom the twelve tribes would comeit ain't even like she's Davidlike she gonna slay Goliathor be a woman after
God's own heartit ain't like she's Solomon the one who'sgonna have all of this wisdom and be all wealthyit ain't like she's Daniellike she over here interpreting the kings dreamsand things it ain't like she's Elijahor Elisha or Ahabor Hezekiah it ain't even like she'sJosiah like she over here introducingthe law back and saying she ain't Nehemiahshe ain't building the wall backlike she's noteven a partof ethnic Israelshe is a gentilea gentile womana part of a nationthat had more than one Godbut it wasn't Isis that respondedto her suffering it wasn't Osiristhat responded to her praiseit was the Lord of Lords and the King of Kingsand Yahwehit was the Lordof Israel who came allthe way down into the wildernessto meet with a gentile slavenamed Hagarthis is graceit is not justthat God sees youit is that God allows himselfto be seenJoni Eareckson Tyler was 17when she dove into the Chesapeake Bayshe didn't realizethat the water that she was diving intowas shallow so when she dove intothe water she landed on a rockbroke her neckfractured her vertebraeand from that day forward she was paralyzedfrom the shoulders down that was 1967in 2010Joni was diagnosed with stage 3 cancershe underwent amastectomy chemotherapyand if you've ever had anyone in yourlife endure cancer youunderstand that it's ait's a evildisease for what it doesto people in their bodies JoniJoni has been sufferingher entire lifeone day Joni was in the carwith her husband and she was feeling sickbecause of the chemo and theygot into a conversation on sufferingand this is what Joni said in an interview that I watchedwith her she saidsuffering is like alittle splash over of hellthat comes earlyshe said suffering comesto wake you up from yourspiritual slumber and get youto appreciate the actual hellChrist rescued you fromthey talk through thatidea a littlemore and Joni beingintrospective said this she said ifsuffering is a splashover of hellthen what is a splash over of heavento which I would askis it when
everythingis easy is itwhen hope is high as heavenis it when everything israinbows and butterflies is itwhen joy isn't hard to findand this womanwho hasn't been able towalk or runor swimor sit down without assistance oruse her hands freely who is nowenduring cancer and chemo this is herresponse to her own question she saysI think a splash over of heavenis finding Jesusin the middle of your hellthere there's this hymncalled blessed assurance don't know ifyou've heard of it beforeand it has a portion of it that saysperfect submission allis at rest I am mysavior am happy and blessedwatching and waiting looking abovefilled with his goodness lostin his love that probably don't hit the sameif you don't know who made it this was writtenby a woman named Fannie Crosbywhen Fannie was six years old sheshe had or six weeks old she had a coldthat ended up messing up with her eyesand she had inflammation and the doctordid a procedure that left her blindin her eyes from the day that she was bornshe was much like Christopher that we mentionedin the beginning who they are they were twopeople that had eyes but could notsee that's significant when you realizethat this is the same woman who wrote this wordshe said I am my saviorhappy and blessed watchingand waiting lookingabove filled with his goodnessand lost in his love that tells methat Fannie maybe couldn't seebut she could still seeJonimight not have been able to use her limbsbut she was still able to walk towardsGod and move towards Godin the midst of her pain and that's what sufferingdoes that is what suffering doeswhen you respond to it how Jesus tellsus pain open our eyes to seewhere the world refuses to look we see himwho was high and lifted upwe see him who was worthy to be praisedwe see him who will never leave therighteous forsaken nor his seedbegging for bread and our sufferingsaints and our sufferingyou have to seethe Godwho has been seeing usI want to speakwant to speak to a specificgroup of peopleI was praying for
Dallaswe all were praying for DallasI was praying for youand the Lord took meto 1 Corinthians 31 Corinthians 3Paul is talking to the churchin Corinthand he says that he wanted to comegive themmeatbut he had to give them milkand it was because even though they were inChrist they were still worldlything about worldlinessis that it canhide churchy peopleknow how to do worldliness rightbecause they go to churchthey go to Bible studythey sing the songsthey quote the scripturesthey're not externally wickedbut their heartstheir ears itchI think Godwants to grow some people uptodaypeople who have been babies for too longstill selfishstill self centeredstill irreverentin behavior but not in speechand my concernisthat to whom much is givenmuch is required meaningbecause you are in a placethat has 27,000 churchesmany of you sit under solidand good teachingand many of you have been raisedunder solid and good Christiansyou know too much to live the way you doyou will be held accountablefor what you do with the information you haveGodwhen he died for youhe died so you can know himhe died for you to play churchhe died for you to know himhe hasn't given you his wordas a means of entertainmenthe's given you his word so you can know himhe hasn't given you a churchso you can be in the in crowdhe's given you a church so you can know himhe hasn't even given you giftsso you can flex and feel good about yourselfeven in ministry he's given you your giftsso you can help other people know himhe wants you to know himsome of you sit under teachingall the timeand your life is still the sameyou're still enviousyou're still covetousand that's not to saythat you aren't in Christbut it is to sayif you are still walking in a waythat is merely humanyou need to be concernedbecause we have to stewardour life with Godso you can play musicto soften the people's heartsI'm so serioushe made the heavens and the earthhe made the plantsand the starshe made the sun and the moonhe made everythingand then he
madetwo people made in his imagethe image of Godmeans a few thingsbut one preeminent meaningis that it means that they were made to reflect himto makehim knownto reveal his naturegives them a lawand says that they can eat from any treein the garden that he placed them inmeaning God gave themendless optionsendless accesswith one prohibitiondon'teat from the treeof the knowledge of good and evilthe day you eat from that treeyou shall surely dieSatancomes embodiedin a snakefirst instance of possessionand starts to have a conversationwith Evethe first questions he asked herone he didn't even introduce himselfwhich should have told her alreadyhe's rudeit's rudeness in paradisethat's sinsaiddid God really sayyou can't eat from the treethatSatan is still playing that game with uswhere he has us questioning God's wordall the timestarts to have a conversation with the serpentand she says Godhe said that we couldn't eat from itand he also said that we couldn't touch itGod never said she couldn't touch itso that tells you that she was already very unclearof the word of Godwhich gave access to the enemy's schemeshe saysyou will not surely diefor God knows that when you eat of ityou will be like Godknowing good and evildo you understand how compellingthat is for us even todayis that we will even listen toteachers that will not call you Godbut center you in their sermonstherefore making you better than himthey are reinforcingour narcissismand therefore making usfeel sufficient within ourselvesto do lifeand you wonder why you don't praylike you should because you don't think you need itthat's the searchthe serpentEve she eats the fruitgives some to her husbandand he eatsand it says that the eyes of both of them were openedand they knew they were nakedand they sewed fig leaves togetherand made themselves loin clothsin the gardenyou see the entry of arrogancethis kind ofdeification of ourselvesbut you also see the entry of shameand I think some of youhave been a part of churches
and institutionsthat have shamed you so muchthat solid teaching about sin scares youscares youbecause you've had people usethe word to abuse youand so you run from authenticgospel centered sintalking about teachingand it's because you're swinging the pendulumthe other way grace and truthis where God wants to bring youwhen sin entered into the world manit made us terrible peoplewretchedthe simple expression of sinis that we want to do what we wantdon't really want God to get gloryout of our lifeout of our bodiesout of our talents out of our giftsout of our relationshipsand so we live this lifein antagonism towards Godbut in his kindnesshe knew that there was nothing you could doto make yourself right with himit don't matter how many gospel songs you singit don't matter how many conferences you attendit don't matter howeven some of you who know doctrinewho know all the thingseven that is insufficient to save youand you see even that in the gardenwhen God shows upwalking in the cool of the daywhat do they do they hidethey hide behind a treeas if the tree could protect them from the judgment of Godwe are still hiding behind creative thingswe're hiding behind our ministrieswe're hiding behind our personalitieswe're hiding behind our jobswe're still hiding behind made thingsas if they're a mediatorbut you need JesusJesusis GodGod in the fleshwho came to livea life that only he can livewhich is perfectwhich is righteouswhich is completely obedient to God's lawand this Christcame with the intentionto die for youhe went to the crossand on the cross he took his sins on yourselfhe took your self righteousnesshe took your pridehe took your unrighteous angerhe took your envyhe took your covetousnesshe took your evilhe took your pornography addictionhe took all your idolatryhe took everything you do wronghe took it on himselfand I said it earlierthe one who knew no sin became sinso that we could become the righteousness of Godand on the crossthe Lord judged his son how he was
supposed to judge youso that all who placed their faiththeir belief, their trusttheir life in the Lord Jesus Christcan receive his righteousnessthe righteousness that he earnednot youGod says that all who put their faithin himwill be savedbut not only will you be savedby putting your faith in Godyou will also be sanctifiedthe gospel doesn't just save youit keeps youit keeps yousome of us stopped meditating on the gospela long time ago and so I want to remind youthis is the good newsand so as we worshipaltar is openthere's no powerin the altarthere's even no power in you coming to itif you don't come to it in faithbut even in your chairswherever you arehowever you feelask for Godto give you a heartfor him againand repentrepentance is to turnfrom your sinit's not a feelingit's a decisionyou are decidingthat everything you love and enjoythat God don't love and enjoyis not worth itmake the decisionto turn from your sinand put your faith back in the onewho died for youthat's the good newsthat's really all I got to offer youand I hope that the Lord will meet youI prayLord I thank youI thank you foryour sonI you for your wordI thank you for your mercythat you will preach the gospelto us again and again and againGod help us believehelp us trustgive us the powerto lay aside every weightevery sin thatentangles us so that we can runthe race that was set before uswe prayfor those who areeven now feeling shameGod I pray that you would replace theirshame with godly griefGod that their repentancewould be the repentance that yourespond tothat you would deliver them fromungodly fear irrationalfear maybe they've heard messaging aroundyour character that is not actually trueLord I pray that they would remember that youlove them that you seethem that you want to know them thateven if they're in Christ and noteven living right you still delight in thembecause they stand in the righteousness of your sonso God I pray that you would meet usnow through the worshipthat you would meet us
nowby your spirit in Jesus nameAmen
on Jul 24, 2024
