Encouragement and Gratitude: Strengthening Godly Friendships

In this sermon, I discussed the gift of encouragement and the role it plays in our lives, especially in times of despair and depression. I highlighted the importance of godly friendships and the power they hold in uplifting and encouraging us through difficult times. Drawing from Romans chapter 1, I emphasized the mutual comfort and encouragement that comes from shared faith. I shared stories of long nights spent in prayer and sharing testimonies of God's goodness, which served as a source of encouragement and a reminder of God's faithfulness.

In the second part of the sermon, I focused on the importance of gratitude and the power it holds in shifting our perspective from despair to hope. I referenced Hebrews chapter 3 and 1 Thessalonians 5, emphasizing the need for daily encouragement to prevent being hardened by sin's deceitfulness. I challenged the congregation to evaluate their friendships biblically, considering whether their friends provide wise counsel, prayer, and encouragement. Lastly, I discussed the importance of correction in friendships, drawing from Galatians chapter 2, and emphasized that godly friends won't let us compromise or slip back into our old ways.

Key Takeaways:
1. The gift of encouragement is a powerful tool in uplifting those around us and reminding them of God's faithfulness ([22:51 ]).
2. Gratitude can shift our perspective from despair to hope, and daily encouragement is necessary to prevent being hardened by sin's deceitfulness ([31:25 ]).
3. It's important to evaluate our friendships biblically, considering whether they provide wise counsel, prayer, and encouragement ([32:50 ]).
4. Godly friends won't let us compromise or slip back into our old ways, they will correct us out of love and concern ([16:17 ]).
5. The power of shared testimonies in overcoming challenges and encouraging one another ([27:30 ]).

Bible Reading:
1) Romans 1:8-12 [23:35 ]
2) Hebrews 3:13 [31:25 ]
3) 1 Thessalonians 5:11 [32:05 ]

Observation Questions:
1) What does Paul mean when he says he wants to be "mutually encouraged" by the faith of his friends in Romans 1:8-12?
2) How does Hebrews 3:13 connect the act of daily encouragement with avoiding sin's deceitfulness?
3) In 1 Thessalonians 5:11, what does it mean to "build up one another"?

Interpretation Questions:
1) How does the concept of mutual encouragement in Romans 1:8-12 apply to our relationships today?
2) How can daily encouragement help us avoid being hardened by sin's deceitfulness as mentioned in Hebrews 3:13?
3) What are some practical ways we can "build up one another" as instructed in 1 Thessalonians 5:11?

Application Questions:
1) Can you think of a time when you were uplifted by a friend's faith? How did that experience impact your own faith?
2) How can you incorporate daily encouragement into your interactions with others to help avoid sin's deceitfulness?
3) Who is someone in your life that you can start building up today? What is one specific way you can encourage them this week?
4) Reflect on your current friendships. Are they helping you move closer to God or drawing you away from Him? What changes might you need to make?
5) What type of friend are you being to others? Are you a source of encouragement and wise counsel? How can you improve in these areas?

All right, so we've been having a conversation about relationships.

Last week, we began talking about the importance of relationships, how we all have them, the different types of relationships, and why these relationships matter.

As believers, as people who love Jesus Christ and have made Jesus Lord of our life, it is important that we look at all of our relationships from the perspective of our faith. We can't just afford to be haphazardly having any type of relationship, even if it doesn't align with the Word. Amen? It is a hazard to our life.

So last week, we began talking about why that's important. As we get started, I want to highlight why it is important to lean into and understand the importance of relationships in our lives. It matters because not only do relationships matter to God, but last week we said godly relationships are designed to move us and assist us in getting to the purpose and destination that God has planned for us.

Every relationship that we have is designed to move us and assist us in getting to God's destiny and plan for our life. Relationships move you.

Today, I want to talk about a specific type of relationship that I feel is extremely important for us to look at as it pertains to the perspective of our faith. Today, I want to talk about friendships. I want to evaluate the importance of friendships and how, when our friendships align both spiritually and biblically, they can be amazing assets to our life and our legacy.

First of all, when we look at friendships, we have to understand that the title "friend" is a privilege. It is a privilege and an honor to have, and everyone is not meant to be your friend. Everyone is not called to be your friend.

Now, some of us, when we were in school, it didn't matter who it was; once we met them, we called them "my friend." "Oh, this is my friend such and such," and "this is my friend such and such." Your mom would ask you, "Well, you don't even know these people; why are you calling them your friend?"

The title "friend" is something that should be held in high regard. Friendships have requirements; they serve a pivotal role in our life, and friendships should not be entered into lightly.

Now, there will be some people that you'll come across who will say, "You know what? I get it and all, but it's too serious. It's just friendships; it doesn't matter. You can have a lot, you can have a little, you could have good ones; sometimes you may need some bad friends."

Proverbs chapter 18, verse 24 says, "A man of too many friends, chosen indiscriminately, will be broken in pieces and come to ruin." The man who chooses friends who don't think that having friends is important, who doesn't think that you should have requirements when it comes to your set of friends, will be broken in pieces and come to ruin.

I don't know about y'all, but I don't desire to be broken in pieces or come to ruin, and I don't think any of us desire to be broken in pieces or come to ruin. This is why who we choose to do life with and the people that we call friends is important because our life, our purpose, and our destiny—and the destiny of those we are tied to—is on the line.

It's not just about us, but those that we are tied to—our destiny, our future, their destiny, their future—all of it is on the line.

John chapter 15, starting in verse 13, says, "No one has greater love nor stronger commitment than to lay down his life for his friends." Verse 14 says, "You are my friends if you keep on doing what I command you." He says, "I don't call you servants any longer, because the servant does not know what his master is doing. But I have called you my friends because I have revealed to you everything I have heard from my Father."

When I read this scripture, the first thing that came to me was that there is a requirement on friendship. There is a requirement on friendship. When he opens it up, the first thing he says is, "No one has greater love or stronger commitment than to lay down his life for his friend," which tells me that the first requirement of friendship is love.

And not this Valentine's Day love, "That's my birthday," no disrespect, but not this love that just comes and goes—not this feeble type of "Oh, I love you," "I love you too." Not that. He says there's a different type of love.

I wanted to make sure, so I looked this up, and the type of love that he's talking about here is agape love. See, there are different types of love. We talked about this before; there's phileo, there's brotherly love. I thought, "You know, obviously he's talking about friendship; maybe he's talking about a brotherly love." But I looked it up, and he says, "No, this word is translated agape."

This word agape means the unconditional affectionate concern for the well-being of another. Unconditional affectionate concern for the well-being of another. There is a requirement on love. This isn't just something that pops up when you have coffee with somebody. This isn't someone who likes the same things that you like and is just a part of the same party that you're a part of, or maybe you guys live on the same street.

No, no, no, no. This is something that is built over time. This is something that is built through adversity. This is something that is fortified through experience. This type of friendship that Jesus is talking about involves two people committed to continually serving and unconditionally seeking the best for one another.

That's what this type of friendship means. This is a godly friendship. Rather than this mentality of "What can I get? How can I get? How can this person benefit me?" it's a mentality of "What can I give? How can I serve this person? How can I better this person? How can I be there and support this person?"

It's the gift of friendship. It's a gift of friendship.

Today, as I go through this, I'm going to go over some gifts that friendships offer you. Sometimes that gift is presence—just the presence of people, just the presence of friends.

When I was in Atlanta, I had a house, and sometimes people would come over. Maybe somebody came over for the first time, or they just came over with somebody else. They would come in the house, in the living room. I had a big living room with a bunch of couches, and they would come in, and you would just see people sitting down, nobody talking to nobody. Folks are on their phones; folks are watching TV. It's just a group of people that are just there.

It's just the gift of presence. We don't need to say anything; you're here, I see you, you're fine, you know where the refrigerator is, the TV is on, we're good. Sometimes it's just presence that you need—the gift of presence.

Sometimes it's prayer. Let me tell you something: your friends should be able to pray for you. Your friends should be able to seek heaven on your behalf. If you have a friend and you can't call them to pray for you, if you can't call them and they seek heaven on your behalf, guess what? They're not a friend.

I know it hurts—ouch, ouch for you—but if you can't pick up the phone and have them pray for you, they're not your friend. They're not your friend. Take care of it when you leave: evaluate, call, delete numbers, block whatever you need to do, but they are not your friend.

The gift of prayer. Maybe it's a gift of community—just being in the presence, hanging out, going out to eat, just fellowshipping one with another.

And sometimes that gift is the gift of sound counsel. Proverbs chapter 27, we'll start in verse 9: "Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel." The sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.

Godly friends—you can go to them in tough times. Godly friends—you can talk to them in confidence about life, and you know that you will get understanding, that you will get wisdom, that you will get wise counsel.

"Hey, I just wanted to call you; I'm going through this. I just want to know, you know, what do you think about this?" "Yes, you need to do this." "No, you don't need to do this." "No, this is not good for you." "No, this is..." That's the gift of wise counsel from a friend.

The benefit of having godly friends is you don't have to worry about an ulterior motive.

"Girl, I've been dating this guy, and I was thinking I should probably just leave him alone." "Yeah, I think you should leave him alone." "I think you should leave him alone."

Pick up the phone: "Hey, she's getting ready to dump you." I just want to see, you know, I know you was feeling me; I'm feeling you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that happens all the time. But that's what happens when you don't have godly friends. It's not wise counsel. You got to worry about, "Why are you telling me this? Are you telling me this because you want them? Are you telling me this because it's going to benefit you?"

That's what happens when you don't have godly friends.

The benefit of wise counsel. My wife showed me an Instagram post yesterday or the day before yesterday. We were watching it, and the guy is talking. He's doing this video, and the guy is like, "Hey, I just was calling you, and you know something happened today, and I just wanted to run it by you. I was in a store today, and this person bumped up against me, and then I punched him in the face. I punched him in the face, and when I punched him in the face, I dragged him through the freezer aisle. Then the police came. The police came; I'm fighting him. We get to the jail, and the jail comes, and we're still fighting in the jail. I just wanted to see, did you think I overreacted?"

And they were like, "No, I don't think you overreacted at all."

He said, "What happened again?" "Oh, they just bumped into me." "No, I don't think you overreacted at all."

"I didn't think so either because, you know, after that happened, they wound up going to the hospital because I busted them in the face. Then I walked in; I found out where they were in the hospital, and then I unplugged the thing from the wall where they was..."

"You don't think I overreacted, do you?" "No, no, not at all, not at all."

But here's the thing: when you have people who are not godly friends, you don't get wise counsel, and then you wind up being in a crazy place because you sought confidence from somebody who didn't have your best interest in the first place.

Godly counsel is important. God can use wise counsel. God can use the wise counsel of friends to confirm what he's already been saying to you.

You ever been thinking about something or praying about something, and then you call up a friend and you say, "Hey, I just want to see what you think about this," and they say the same thing that you were already thinking about, that the Lord had already revealed to you? That is a gift of wise counsel from a friend—a godly friend.

Sometimes that gift is wise counsel. Sometimes that gift is correction.

Proverbs chapter 27, let's start at verse 6. Proverbs 27:6 says, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend who corrects out of love and concern, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful because they serve his hidden agenda."

We just talked about this. We just talked about this. Wounds—when you talk about wounds and friendship, this isn't one that people think of immediately because when we think of friendship, we don't think that friendship comes with wounds.

But the scripture says the wounds of a friend are faithful. The NIV says the wounds of a friend can be trusted. Why? Because true friendship is wanting the best for you. True friendship will correct you out of their love and their concern for you, and sometimes that hurts.

Sometimes it hurts. "Hey, I just—yeah, I already know we had this conversation ten times. Let me tell you something: look, we done did this already. You have to make a decision about what you want to do in your life, and I am your friend, so I am going to tell you this is a problem. I'm going to tell you you don't need to be a part of that relationship. I'm going to tell you you need to make a change. I'm going to tell you you need to be in church. I'm going to tell you you need to read the Word of God for yourself. I'm going to tell you you’re gossiping, and you need to stop. I'm going to tell you that you don't look well."

I'm going to tell you. Why? Because the wounds of a friend are faithful.

And we don't like that. I know, I know, I already know because what we say when they say that? "I didn't call you for that." Yeah, I already know. I already know that's not why I called you. I didn't call you to help me; I just called you to listen.

Well, then you called the wrong friend because I'm not that friend. I'm not going to sit there and pacify you. I'm going to tell you what you need to know. Why? Because I care about you.

That's what friends are here for. They will correct you out of love and concern for you. Godly friends won't let you slip back into the old you. Godly friends won't let you compromise. Godly friends won't pacify your feelings. Godly friends care about your character.

They say, "You messed up. You messed up, but we're going to get it right, and I'm going to be here with you."

That's right. Galatians chapter 2, let's start at verse 1. Galatians chapter 2, let's start at verse 11. Verse 11 reads, "When Cephas came to Antioch, I opposed him to his face because he stood condemned."

He said, "I had to check him right in his face because he knew he was wrong. For when certain men came from James, he used to eat with the Gentiles, but when they arrived, he began to draw back and separate himself from the Gentiles because he was afraid of those who belonged to the circumcision group."

The elites, the hierarchy. The other Jews joined him in this hypocrisy so that by their hypocrisy even Barnabas was led astray.

When I saw that they were not acting in line with the truth of the Gospel, I said to Cephas in front of them all, "You are a Jew, yet you live like a Gentile and not like a Jew. How is it that you force Gentiles to follow Jewish customs? We are Jews by birth and not sinful Gentiles. We know that a person is not justified by the works of the law but by faith in Jesus. So we too have put our faith in Jesus that we may be justified by faith in Christ and not by the works of the law, because by the works of the law no one will be justified."

He came up to him and said, "Hey, you're being fake, and I don't like it. You're being fake, and I don't like it. You know you regularly eat with the Jews, but when these people got here, now you don't want to eat with the Jews no more because they belong to the circumcision group. So now you want to act like you don't do what you normally do. You know that it's not by our following the law that we're justified by faith. You know that we are justified by faith, not of works, so why are you acting funny now?"

Why? Because he was a friend. He wasn't afraid to address him and correct him.

Also, here's another one—what he had—another gift of friendship. This one's free; I ain't going to charge you for this one. This one he had the gift of perspective.

See, sometimes you don't see yourself. Sometimes what they say, "You ain't smelling yourself." Oh my God.

So what happens is someone from a different perspective, who has your best interest at heart, has the ability to see what's going on and correct you and tell you about yourself because, as a friend, he was able to see that his actions were not only affecting him, but it was affecting the other Jews, and it was affecting Barnabas.

It wasn't just about him, so he said, "As a friend, I have to correct you." Not because I am looking to gain a status, not because I'm looking to humiliate you, but I care about you. I care about your purpose. I care about the calling on your life. I care about what God wants to do in your life, and I'm not going to let you throw that down the drain.

The gift of correction. Paul cared enough about him to correct him. Godly friends want you living in line with the Word.

I love that in Galatians he said, "When I saw that they were not acting in line with the truth of the Gospel, I had to speak up." Godly friends want you living in line with the Word of God. They want you moving toward your destiny and your purpose, and they view anything that's moving you away from your destiny and purpose as an immediate threat, and they will call you out on it because that is their job. That's what real friends do.

Proverbs 19, verse 20 says, "Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end, you will be counted among the wise." Sometimes your friends got to call you out, and if you don't have a friend that is in your life that has the ability to call you out, then they're not your friend. They're not your friend.

Because godly friends are willing to speak up and pull your coattail sometimes. Godly friends guard vigorously over your heart, your soul, and your spirit, and sometimes that requires correction. It is the gift of correction because it comes from a place of love and concern. It's a gift.

So we talked about the gift of sound counsel. We talked about the gift of perspective. We talked about the gift of correction.

Right now, we live in this time where despair and depression are at an all-time high. This morning, in our prayer time, what we've begun to do is ask for prayer requests in our 8:00 prayer time when we pray with all of our leaders and volunteers.

It was brought up to us this morning that, hey, some of our people are struggling with depression. It's a real thing, and just because we know Jesus and love Jesus doesn't mean that it's not an attack that the enemy will use.

These things are at an all-time high, and there are people who are living in a constant state of discouragement, whether it's their family, their job, their relationships, their finances, or maybe even just the way the world is at large.

This is why one of the major gifts of having and being a godly friend is the ability and the opportunity that we have to encourage those around us—to remind them of God's faithfulness, to remind them of God's blessing and grace on our life.

Sometimes, as a friend, it will be one of the most important things you do. Paul is speaking in this letter to someone he calls friend, and he pointed out what I feel is one of the most major gifts of having a godly friend, and it is the gift of encouragement.

Romans chapter 1, starting in verse 9, he says, "For God, whom I serve with my spirit by preaching the gospel of his Son, is my witness as to how continuously I mention you in my prayers, always pleading that by somehow, by God's will, I may at last come to you. For I long to see you so that I may share with you some spiritual gift to strengthen and establish you."

Then he said to clarify, "Oh, he says that is that we may be mutually encouraged and comforted by each other's faith, both yours and mine."

Paul is talking about being mutually comforted, being mutually encouraged by each other's faith.

There is something powerful that happens when we, as friends, get together and encourage one another. I was reminded of this right before first service as I was going over the message. I remember, you guys will remember this, when I first got here, I would hear stories about these long nights that used to happen.

There would be my mother-in-law and my father-in-law and Ruby and some of the saints. They would get together, and it wouldn't be anything that was planned. They would just get up and they would just get together.

I remember my cousin Jeffrey telling me sometimes they would all go in the room, and they would just go to sleep because they knew it was going to be a long night. When they were telling me this story, I asked Mom, "What are y'all doing at 2 and 3 in the morning?"

She said, "Child, we just talk about the Lord." I said, "Well, what was happening?" She said, "We get in there, and we just start talking about the things that God had done for us."

I would go in there and say, "Hey, let me tell you what God did for me this week. You know, I was thinking about this thing, and I just began to pray, and I just started praying about it, and sure enough, God just showed up in the middle of nowhere and took care of this thing for me."

Then somebody else would say, "Oh, well, you think that's something? Well, let me tell you what he did for me because I was sitting down, and I wasn't feeling well in my body, and I began to pray, and I began to talk to him and tell him about what was going on, and then all of a sudden, as I'm praying, I can feel the healing starting to happen."

"Well, you think that's something? Let me tell you what he told me."

What would happen is there would be this encouragement that would keep going forth. There would be this cycle of being reminded of all the things that God had done, and it would just start going from one to another, and hours and hours and hours would go by because they began to just continue to encourage one another.

Here's the thing: you don't know what they walked in with. You might not know what your friends are walking in with, but there is a gift that you have of the opportunity to be reminded of God's grace, to be reminded of his faithfulness, to be reminded of the healings that he's already done for you.

You're worried about the healing you got, but being reminded of the 511 times he's already healed you, being reminded of the 511 times that he's already provided for you, to be reminded of all the things that he's already done.

Sometimes when you come in there discouraged and you begin to be reminded about that thing, you begin to get encouraged. You begin to get uplifted. You begin to get reminded. Your spirit begins to fill up, and before you know it, you're excited. You're excited like, "Oh man, hallelujah!"

Why? Because of the gift of encouragement. That's a gift that you have, and it may be one of the most important gifts that you have.

It might be the very thing. I don't know what's going on with you, but I just figured I just want to tell you the Bible in Revelations talks about they overcame through the blood of the Lamb and the power of their testimony.

You say, "I can't preach; I can't do this," but you can tell somebody. You can tell, especially your friend, you can tell them what God has done for you.

I can't tell you how many times I've been around my family and others, and it's just conversations that just start happening. They just start happening, and it doesn't matter what's going on in you. When you hear about what God has done, when you hear about what he is doing, as deep and as tough as it is, you're reminded, "Oh yeah, what do you say? He's the same God."

He's the same God. When you're reminded of people, I remember my Aunt Pat. I told the story about how she was laying in the hospital, and every time she walks in here, I'm reminded of God's faithfulness. I'm encouraged when I see her walking in, and I see her strutting in.

I'm reminded of God's faithfulness. I'm reminded when we see—that's why it's important to tell these things, to have these conversations and tell about what God has done. Because guess what? There are some people in here who don't believe.

Yeah, yeah, there are some of your friends who are struggling with belief. When they come to you, "Hey, can you pray for me?" I do it on purpose. "Hey, can you pray for me?" "Yeah, I'm going to pray for you, but let me tell you, I'm just encouraged that you were here because I remember when you didn't think you were going to be here. I remember when you thought that was it for you the last time. I remember when you thought you didn't have enough the last time."

And so I'm just encouraged by God for what he's already done. We're going to pray for what you need, but I just want to remind you and take a second to encourage you about what God has already done so you can be reminded of his faithfulness.

This is a gift you have, and it may be one of the most important gifts that you carry.

And I say the same thing, like I said before: if you have a friend and they cannot encourage you, they are not your friend. They are not your friend.

This is a gift. Paul said, "I pray that we may be mutually encouraged and comforted by each other's faith, both yours and mine." That means we both got to have it.

When that happens, when you get to talking about that thing and you get to being reminded, you begin to share about the miracles that you've seen. You move from this place of despair; you move from this place of depression, and you move to being grateful.

You move to being encouraged. You move to this heart of gratefulness instead of looking at all the things that are going wrong and all the things that are happening. You get to this place, and you're like, "You know what, God? I'm sorry. I was tripping. Let me take a second to say thank you, Jesus. I forgot you gave me the very breath that I'm breathing right now to be discouraged, so let me take a second and say thank you."

Hebrews chapter 3 says, "But encourage one another daily as long as it is called today so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness."

Because here's what sin will have you thinking: here's what the enemy wants you to believe: it's never going to get better. He's not going to come through this time. He ain't heard your prayer. He's not concerned with you. He's not worried about you. He's not going to do what he said he's going to do.

He says, "No, no, no, no, no. Be encouraged one another daily as long as it's called today so that you won't be fooled, so that you won't be hardened by sin's deceitfulness."

1 Thessalonians 5 says, "Therefore encourage and comfort one another, build up one another just as you are doing."

He's telling us we are called to have this gift of encouragement. Hebrews chapter 10 says—we read this last week—"And let us consider thoughtfully how we may encourage one another to love and to do good deeds."

When you think about the friends you have in your life, maybe the ones that are coming, maybe the ones that you're even now considering, I challenge you to evaluate your friendships biblically. Your life is too precious. Your life is too precious.

Evaluate your friendships biblically. Friendships should not be taken lightly because God uses friendships to steer us and assist us to the path and the calling and the purpose that he has for our life.

In the same way, the enemy can use friendships to take you off the plan and the path that God has for you.

1. "Instead of looking at all the things that are going wrong and all the things that are happening, you get to this place where you say, 'God, I'm sorry. I was tripping. Let me take a second to say thank you. I forgot you gave me the very breath that I'm breathing right now to be discouraged. So let me take a second and say thank you.'" - 30:26

2. "Evaluate your friendships biblically. Your life is too precious. Friendships should not be taken lightly because God uses friendships to steer us and assist us to the path and the calling and the purpose that he has for our life. In the same way, the enemy can use friendships to take you off the plan and the path that God has for your life." - 32:50

3. "The sweetness of a friend comes from his Earnest counsel. Godly friends, you can go to them in tough times. You can talk to them in confidence about life and you know that you will get understanding, that you will get wisdom, that you will get wise counsel." - 10:52

4. "The man of too many friends that are chosen indiscriminately will be broken in pieces and come to ruin. This is why who we choose to do life with and the people that we call friend is important because our life, our purpose, and our destiny and the destiny of those we are tied to is on the line." - 04:43

5. "There are people who are living in a constant state of discouragement. This is why one of the major Gifts of having and being a Godly friend is the ability and the opportunity that we have to encourage those around us, to remind them of God's faithfulness, to remind them of God's blessing and Grace on our life." - 22:51