Showing Mercy in Your Family
Summary
Mercy is the foundation of every blessing we experience, and it is never something we can earn or deserve. God’s mercy is the reason we have hope, restoration, and the ability to love others, especially within our own families. The home is often the most challenging place to show mercy, yet it is where it is most needed. We can find ourselves being more gracious to strangers than to those closest to us, but God calls us to a higher standard—one that reflects His own mercy toward us.
True mercy is not just a feeling; it is love in action. It is a choice to forgive, to be patient, to be kind, and to let go of past hurts. The characteristics of love described in 1 Corinthians 13—patience, kindness, not keeping a record of wrongs, always trusting—are not just ideals, but practical ways to live out mercy in our daily relationships. Overlooking offenses, being kind when it’s undeserved, letting go of past wounds, and believing that God is still at work in our loved ones are all expressions of this mercy.
Stories from within our own community illustrate the power of mercy to heal marriages, restore broken parent-child relationships, and break generational cycles of pain. Whether it’s a wife choosing to forgive her husband, a daughter learning to see her mother through God’s eyes, a mother releasing her son from the weight of his past, or a woman finding redemption and a new beginning as a mother, each testimony points to the relentless mercy of God.
Mercy is not about ignoring pain or pretending everything is fine. It is about trusting God’s process, surrendering our hurts, and allowing His love to transform us and those around us. Even when restoration seems impossible, God specializes in the impossible. His mercies are new every morning, and His faithfulness never fails. As we extend mercy at home, we become living proof of God’s grace, and our families become places of healing, hope, and new beginnings.
Key Takeaways
- Mercy Begins at Home: The hardest place to show mercy is often within our own families, where familiarity can breed impatience and harshness. Yet, God calls us to extend the same grace to our loved ones that we so easily offer to strangers. True spiritual maturity is revealed not in public, but in the private moments of our homes, where forgiveness and patience are most needed. [03:01]
- Mercy is Love in Action, Not Just Emotion: Mercy is not a passive feeling but an intentional choice to act in love, even when it’s difficult. This means overlooking offenses, choosing not to keep a record of wrongs, and responding with kindness rather than resentment. When we act mercifully, we reflect the heart of God and create space for healing and restoration. [06:45]
- Letting Go of the Past Frees Us and Others: Holding onto past hurts and keeping a mental record of wrongs only leads to bitterness and broken relationships. God’s love calls us to delete, not repeat, the offenses of the past. Forgiveness is not about excusing the wrong, but about releasing ourselves and others from the prison of resentment, making room for God’s redemptive work. [27:43]
- Kindness to the Undeserving is a Form of Worship: Showing kindness, especially to those who have hurt us or seem undeserving, is a powerful act of worship and obedience to God. It is through acts of undeserved kindness that we mirror the mercy God has shown us, and often, it is this very kindness that opens the door to reconciliation and transformation in relationships. [19:39]
- Trusting God’s Ongoing Work in Our Families: Even when change seems slow or impossible, we can trust that God is still at work in our lives and the lives of our family members. Our role is to persevere in love, hope, and prayer, believing that God will complete the good work He has begun. This trust allows us to extend mercy, knowing that restoration is God’s specialty and His mercies are new every morning. [34:04]
Youtube Chapters
[00:00] - Welcome
[00:10] - Introduction: Mercy May and Mother’s Day
[00:42] - God’s Mercy: The Foundation of Blessing
[01:36] - Principles and Humor of Motherhood
[02:46] - The Challenge of Showing Mercy at Home
[04:21] - A Self-Examination: Are We Merciful at Home?
[06:45] - Mercy as Love in Action
[07:36] - The Characteristics of Real Love
[09:25] - Overlooking Offenses and Irritations
[12:58] - Testimony: Becca Garcia on Forgiving a Spouse
[16:25] - Showing Kindness When It’s Not Deserved
[20:57] - Testimony: Jennifer Garcia on Restoring with Her Mother
[26:07] - Letting Go of Past Hurts
[28:51] - Testimony: Jeanie How on Forgiving Her Son
[33:47] - Trusting God’s Work in Our Families
[35:46] - Testimony: Anna Andredy on Redemption as a Mother
[43:40] - God’s Unfailing Mercy and Closing Prayer
Study Guide
Bible Study Discussion Guide: Mercy Begins at Home
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### Bible Reading
- Romans 9:16 – “So then it does not depend on human desire or effort, but on God’s mercy.”
- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 – “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
- Lamentations 3:22-23 – “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”
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### Observation Questions
1. According to Romans 9:16, what is the true source of mercy in our lives? How does this challenge the idea that we can earn God’s favor? ([00:42])
2. In 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, what are some of the specific characteristics of love that are mentioned? Which of these are described as actions rather than feelings? ([07:36])
3. The sermon mentioned that mercy is often hardest to show at home. What are some reasons given for why it’s more difficult to be merciful with family than with strangers? ([03:01])
4. Lamentations 3:22-23 says God’s mercies are new every morning. How does this truth relate to the idea of starting fresh in our relationships? ([43:52])
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### Interpretation Questions
1. The sermon says mercy is “love in action.” Why is it important to see mercy as a choice and not just a feeling? How does this change the way we respond to family members who hurt us? ([06:45])
2. The passage in 1 Corinthians 13 says love “keeps no record of wrongs.” What does it look like in real life to “delete, not repeat” past offenses, especially in close relationships? ([27:43])
3. The testimonies shared in the sermon showed how mercy can heal marriages and restore families. What role does trusting God’s ongoing work play in being able to extend mercy, even when change seems impossible? ([34:04])
4. The sermon points out that kindness to the undeserving is a form of worship. Why do you think God values this kind of kindness so highly? ([19:39])
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### Application Questions
1. The sermon challenged us to examine if we are more polite and gracious to strangers than to our own family. Can you think of a recent situation at home where you could have shown more mercy? What would you do differently if you could go back? ([03:01])
2. Is there someone in your family you find it especially hard to forgive or be patient with? What is one practical step you can take this week to show them mercy, even if they don’t “deserve” it? ([06:45])
3. The idea of “deleting, not repeating” past hurts was emphasized. Are there any old wounds or grudges you are holding onto? What would it look like to let go and trust God with that pain? ([27:43])
4. One testimony described a mother learning to see her own mom through God’s eyes. Is there a relationship in your family where you need to ask God to help you see the other person with compassion instead of hurt? ([23:08])
5. The sermon said that acts of undeserved kindness are a form of worship. What is one act of kindness you can do this week for a family member who may not expect it? ([19:39])
6. When restoration seems impossible, the sermon reminded us that “God specializes in the impossible.” Is there a situation in your family that feels hopeless? How can you pray and act in faith, trusting God to work? ([34:04])
7. The testimonies showed that mercy can break generational cycles of pain. Are there any patterns in your family you hope will change for future generations? How can you be part of starting a new legacy of mercy and grace? ([41:52])
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Closing Prayer Suggestion:
Ask God to help you see your family through His eyes, to give you the strength to forgive, and to fill your home with His mercy and new beginnings.
Devotional
Day 1: Mercy Is God’s Gift, Not Our Achievement
God’s mercy is not something we can earn or choose by our own efforts; it is a gift that God alone decides to give. This truth humbles us and reminds us that every blessing, every moment of forgiveness, and every act of grace in our lives is rooted in God’s undeserved kindness. As we reflect on our families and relationships, let us remember that the mercy we extend to others is a reflection of the mercy God has first shown to us. [00:42]
Romans 9:16
So then it depends not on human will or exertion, but on God, who has mercy. (ESV)
Reflection: Where in your life have you been tempted to think you must earn God’s favor or mercy? How can you rest today in the truth that His mercy is a gift, not a reward?
Day 2: Mercy Begins at Home—Love in Action
The hardest place to show mercy is often within our own homes, yet this is where it is needed most. Mercy is not just a feeling but a deliberate choice to act in love, patience, and forgiveness toward those closest to us—even when it’s difficult. True mercy means overlooking offenses, letting go of irritations, and choosing to forgive rather than keep a record of wrongs. When we practice mercy at home, we reflect God’s heart and create an environment where grace can flourish. [06:45]
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (ESV)
Reflection: Think of a recent moment at home when you were tempted to react in irritation or impatience. What would it look like to choose mercy and love in that situation today?
Day 3: Showing Kindness When It’s Not Deserved
There are times when people in our lives—especially family—may not seem to deserve our kindness, yet that is precisely when mercy is most powerful. God calls us to be kind and supportive, even to those who are difficult, draining, or have hurt us. This kind of kindness is not only an act of obedience but also an act of worship, reflecting the heart of God who is kind to us even when we fall short. When we choose to do good to those who need help, we become instruments of God’s healing and restoration. [19:19]
Proverbs 3:27
Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. (ESV)
Reflection: Who in your family or circle is hardest for you to be kind to right now? What is one specific act of kindness you can show them today, even if they don’t seem to deserve it?
Day 4: Letting Go of Past Hurts
Holding on to past hurts and keeping a record of wrongs can poison our relationships and our own hearts. God’s love calls us to let go, to forgive, and to delete rather than repeat the offenses of the past. When we release bitterness and choose forgiveness, we open the door for healing and restoration—not only for others but for ourselves. God’s mercy empowers us to move forward, free from the weight of resentment and the cycle of pain. [26:26]
1 Corinthians 13:5
Love is not rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. (ESV)
Reflection: Is there a past hurt or offense you keep rehearsing in your mind? What step can you take today to let it go and invite God’s healing into that area?
Day 5: Trusting God’s Mercy for Ourselves and Our Families
God is always at work in our lives and in the lives of those we love, even when we can’t see it. His mercy is new every morning, and He is faithful to complete the good work He has begun in us and our families. Trusting in God’s mercy means believing that He is able to redeem, restore, and transform every situation—no matter how broken. As we trust Him, we can have hope for ourselves and for those we care about, knowing that His love never fails. [44:11]
Lamentations 3:21-23
But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. (ESV)
Reflection: Where do you need to trust God’s mercy and faithfulness in your family or personal life today? How can you express that trust in prayer or action right now?