Father Dowling was not himself an alcoholic but he needed the 12 steps and he recognized that he became the sponsor essentially of Bill W. Bill W did his most complete fifth step to Father W to uh father Ed dling and uh Ed dling was a remarkable man but he brought great pain he he suffered from arthritis he'd been a minor league baseball player but uh quite soon into his adulta he was basically crippled by that pain he had to face disappointment in his career in his ministry the Jesuits were like high functioning people but they were divided his biographer says into the leapers and the creepers the leapers were the really smart guy they were the Navy seos going to change the world get them a PhD the creepers and kind of intellectual lightweights and father Ed was put into that category. [00:02:42] Making vertical captioned clip



Father Ed and uh he needed the 12 Steps in his own life and his relationship with Bill W was profoundly important uh his article the last thing that he wrote and gave to be sent out to the AA Community was the 12 Steps AA steps for the underprivileged non-alcoholic you might remember I mentioned that my friend Bob who's been in AA for decades told me won't be long when you're studying this that you're going to be jealous that you're not an alcoholic that's exactly what father Ed was writing here it's kind of underprivileged people that have been given the gift of desperation know how much they need God but his point in this article is precisely what we've been doing the 12 steps are needed by everybody the church got the the AA got them from the church now the church needs them back. [00:04:33] Making vertical captioned clip



Pain is the Touchstone of all growth here's what father dling wrote in a little article called how to enjoy being miserable there's two kinds of misery self-chosen doing without candy or smoking uh that's typically what somebody might do during Lent the season we when I'm recording this um probably not too important compared to the second kind God chosen or providential headaches an in-laws temper weather health death these can either be big now uh big pain is too rare and overwhelming to enjoy until we have gradually learned by practice on little sufferings how to do it so what I want you to think about today is a little something little suffering little suffering very important because Petty inconveniences and annoyances are a thousand times more frequent than big tragedies. [00:05:31] Making vertical captioned clip



Little sufferings are easier to practice on in order to develop a habitual Outlook and attitude towards inevitable misery okay so start with a little one I'm going to do this today um there are three attitudes possible we can number one be crushed by them and jump into the river or a movie or a drink or into a debauch of self-pity profanity or resentment self-pity is my preferred drug of choice or number two we can accept them resignedly if we ignore them stoically we are wasting a most valuable experience it would be like ignoring your paycheck if we try to be Spartan Gallant White Knuckle it soon our nerves will get Frid will end up being crushed by our walls we've all been around people doing that they just leak or number three enjoy them to do this you have to be either crazy or in love. [00:06:22] Making vertical captioned clip



In everyday life we see instances of people wanting pain if it helps someone they love in carrying a trunk upstairs with your mother you definitely want to get the heavy end of the burden on a winter night a mother will shiver so as to give a warm blanket to her child hence the psychological trick of changing from resigned Willing Acceptance of suffering to Grateful wanting to take up and enjoy suffering consists in finding someone we love who will be helped by our sufferings St Paul supplies that person when he points out the chance we have to fill up those things that are wanting in the sufferings of Christ This Is The Grateful waning wanting of suffering and great love does this sometimes it happens with very deep pain. [00:07:20] Making vertical captioned clip



A good friend of Nancy and ours went through through the excruciating pain of losing a child an adult child to death uh death by Suicide and Nancy was talking to her she uh discovered the body in the basement and had to cut him down and bring him down to the ground and Nancy was saying I'm so so sorry you had to go through that and her immediate response was no no no I wanted to do that I brought that little body into this world I wanted to be the one to care for it I wanted to be the last one to care for it in his final moments. [00:08:56] Making vertical captioned clip



In our will father darling says uh uh not in our feelings do we do this Christ in Gethsemane or a patient on a dentist chair are examples of a person's will wanting to do things which his feelings do not want but in the will which is the essential determinant of virtue and vice of misery and joy not that I want the suffering to continue as far as know I might be dead in the next instant might be God's will that the suffering cease but in this specific instant now since I cannot avoid this suffering I want to get the best possible use out of it and the best use is love. [00:09:32] Making vertical captioned clip



Of course in this as in everything else Jesus goes before us even in these 12 steps GK Chester and father darling quotes talks about Christ's love affair with the cross what a remarkable phrase what a strange object to have a love affair with and yet Jesus talked about it all through his Teaching Ministry take up your cross and follow me and then of course he embraced it and he made it the symbol uh of his life and of faith in him because in it he was entering into the sufferings of the people that he loved and that's what love does and our God is a loving God and therefore his love affair with the cross. [00:10:18] Making vertical captioned clip



The invitation today is we get ready to name our personal inadequacy my disappointment my failure My Broken Heart my broken family this habit that I by myself am powerless to break this addiction um this guilt that haunts me whatever it is when we meet together and we experience the presence and the power of God for which I am so grateful cuz I find it with you now on this day I just take the pain just the little pain whatever it is that I'm having right now God would you meet me in this pain and could I somehow offer it to you could it somehow as you use it like the widows might be a part of what is wanting in the sufferings of Christ may I meet you in that Great Fellowship of the withered hand and then keep coming back it works when you work it. [00:11:04] Making vertical captioned clip



You just finished a video from our series steps which is based on John's new book recently released also called steps so you can pick that book up anywhere that you like to purchase your books or find out more information about it at becom new.com if you're someone that would like to start practicing working doing the steps with a friend or a small group or your church we've created a web portal for you that should get you all the resources you need to get started you can just go to doth steps.com we are a community that's dedicated to Growing spiritually in Christ one day at a time and a big part of that is prayer so there's a team of us that meet each weekday Monday through Friday to pray for become new and for viewers just like yourself so if you have a prayer request you can send it to us at 855 888 0444 or email it to us at connect becom new.com. [00:12:00] Making vertical captioned clip