What Love Does - 1 John 4:7-21 | Tim Birdwell | Week 9
Devotional
Day 1: God's love moved toward us first.
God moved into human history and made his love visible by coming near; this is the meaning of Advent and the incarnation. When God didn’t shout from heaven but came, put on skin, and lived among people, the pattern for Christian love was set: love moves toward the beloved first. Receive that truth so you can stop starting with yourself and instead move toward others with the same initiation God showed. [09:39]
1 John 4:7-12 (ESV) Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. 10 In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.
Reflection: This week, who is one person you will intentionally move toward (call, visit, serve) without waiting for reciprocity? Commit to one concrete action and a day to do it.
Day 2: God's love paid the ultimate cost.
The love that comes from God is free to the receiver but costly to the Giver—Christ’s death is the propitiation that dealt with God’s wrath against sin. That exchange—wrath poured on the Son instead of on sinners—opens continual access to God so believers may abide in his presence, not just once a year. Let the seriousness and the mercy of that cost shape how you live and how you forgive. [20:01]
1 John 4:9-10 (ESV) In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. 10 In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.
Reflection: What one burden or habit have you tried to carry alone instead of resting under Christ’s propitiation? Name it, confess it to God this week, and take one small step toward trusting his finished work.
Day 3: True love requires costly, sacrificial action.
Real love shows up as sacrifice; it does not wait for perfect conditions or guaranteed return. The father in the prodigal story abandoned dignity and reputation to run, embrace, and restore his son—love moved and it cost him greatly. Practice a love that risks reputation and comfort to restore or serve someone this season. [35:05]
Luke 15:20-24 (ESV) And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. 21 And the son said to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.” 22 But the father said to his servants, “Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. 23 And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate. 24 For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.”
Reflection: Identify one relationship where you can demonstrate sacrificial love (a phone call, an apology, a service). What single costly act will you do this week without expecting repayment?
Day 4: Perfect love casts out all fear.
When God’s love is truly received, it silences the anxieties rooted in fear of punishment or performance. Believing that God’s acceptance in Christ is complete frees one from using people to fill identity needs and frees one to love without anxiety. Let that security reshape your Christmas anxieties, your need for approval, and your ability to forgive. [07:47]
1 John 4:17-18 (ESV) By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment; because as he is so also are we in this world. 18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.
Reflection: What specific fear fuels your holiday stress (approval, performance, scarcity)? Write one sentence of gospel truth you will repeat daily this week to counter that fear.
Day 5: Rupture and reconciliation prove real love.
Real love moves through rupture into reconciliation—apology, repentance, forgiveness, and restoration are not optional extras but the pattern of Christlike community. The church holds people long enough to forgive and be forgiven; staying connected requires the humility to say “I’m wrong” and the courage to offer or receive pardon. Begin this week to practice one honest word of reconciliation in a relationship where you’ve held back. [26:17]
Colossians 3:12-14 (ESV) Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against
Sermon Summary
Eighteen days from Christmas can stir up a lot of pressure—expectations to create memories, buy the right gifts, and make everything magical. I remember our first Christmas as a married couple in a tiny apartment in Nacogdoches. We tried to manufacture a “perfect” day, and it ended in tears and loneliness. That ache points to a deeper problem: when we don’t truly receive God’s love, we scramble to secure love from people, experiences, and stuff. 1 John 4 helps us see what real love does: love moves, love costs, and love frees.
Love moves. Advent is the announcement that God didn’t shout love from heaven; He put on flesh and moved into our neighborhood. The sequence matters: He loved first. Before we prayed a prayer, cleaned up our act, or did anything impressive, the Father sent the Son. Like Jesus at His baptism—beloved before He began ministry—we are invited to live from love, not for love. That frees us to move toward others without using them to fill us.
Love costs. God’s love isn’t sentimental; it’s sacrificial. Jesus is our propitiation—the wrath-bearing substitute who turned judgment into favor. The temple’s mercy seat pointed to this final act. Because His blood was shed, we don’t visit God once a year; we abide with Him always. If love cost God, it will cost us too—time, comfort, pride, and sometimes our “right” to be right.
Love frees. Perfect love casts out fear. If punishment has been carried by Christ, I don’t have to anxiously perform—at Christmas or anywhere else. I can breathe, confess, forgive, and stay. That’s why real community looks like rupture and reconciliation, not curated perfection or AI-styled affirmation. In the prodigal story, the father ran, paid the cost, and threw a party; the older brother couldn’t love because he hadn’t received the father’s love. I’ve learned in my own life and counseling that when I forget the Father’s love, I grasp for control and withhold my heart. But when I receive it, I’m freed to give it.
So take a breath. You are the beloved. Move toward someone. Pay a cost. And let fear fade in the light of a love that came for you first.
Key Takeaways
1. Love moves toward us first God initiated—Advent is God stepping into our world, not us climbing to His. When I live as already loved, I’m freed to move toward people without using them to validate me. The sequence of grace empowers the practice of love. [10:39]
2. Love costs—propitiation, not platitudes At the cross, Jesus absorbed wrath and gave us favor; that’s what propitiation means. The mercy seat becomes a Person, and access becomes abiding. If that’s the love I receive, costly, non-reciprocated love is the love I give. [19:39]
3. Perfect love casts out fear Fear thrives on punishment, but Calvary has settled the verdict. When I rest in God’s delight, performance loosens its grip—I can apologize, forgive, and risk real relationship. Freedom from fear is the engine of everyday love. [07:31]
4. Real love practices rupture and reconciliation Healthy relationships aren’t conflict-free; they’re repair-practicing. Confession and forgiveness are the ordinary rhythms of extraordinary love, unlike counterfeit affirmation that never confronts or heals. Staying power in church, marriage, and friendship is forged here. [26:17]
1 John 4:7–21 — 7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. 10 In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us. 13 By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. 14 And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent the Son to be the Savior of the world. 15 Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. 16 So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. 17 By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. 18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 19 We love because he first loved us. 20 If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. 21 And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.
Observation Questions
Read verses 9–10. What specific actions and words does John use to show how God’s love was made visible and concrete? [19:39]
Read verses 17–18. How does John describe the relationship between love and fear? What does “perfect love casts out fear” mean in this context? [07:31]
Read verses 19–21. What test does John give for claiming to love God? How does that test expose hypocrisy? [22:19]
Read verses 11–13. What evidence does John point to that shows someone truly “abides” in God? How is the Spirit involved in that evidence? [16:29]
Interpretation Questions
How does beginning the story with God’s initiative—“he loved us first”—reshape the believer’s motivation for loving others rather than making love a demand on others? [12:37]
What does the word “propitiation” reveal about the cost and seriousness of God’s love, and how should that understanding affect the shape of sacrificial love among Christians? [19:39]
Why would a secure sense of being “beloved” reduce performance-based living and make confession, apology, and forgiveness more likely in relationships? [13:24]
In what concrete ways can “rupture and reconciliation” be the ordinary rhythm of a healthy church rather than evidence of failure or hypocrisy? [26:17]
Application Questions
You have been loved by God who moved toward you first. Who is one person you will intentionally move toward this week without expecting reciprocation? What practical step will you take? [10:39]
God’s love cost him everything. What is one costly act of love you can offer (time, apology, financial sacrifice, service) to someone close to you this season? Be specific about when and how. [23:19]
Identify one fear or performance habit that still drives you (about Christmas, work, family, or church). What one small step will you take this week to rest in God’s favor instead of performing? [07:31]
Think of a recent rupture in a relationship (church, marriage, friendship). What is one concrete first step you can take toward reconciliation this week (call, visit, written apology, ask for forgiveness)? [26:17]
Who in your life needs to experience the Father’s accepting love from you or needs you to receive it more deeply yourself? What spiritual practice (scripture reading, prayer, confession, counseling) will you begin to help that happen? [36:22]
If loving others will cost you something, what boundary or excuse do you usually use to avoid that cost? How will you remove that excuse this week and act instead?
Sermon Clips
And what I would submit to you and what I believe the Apostle John would submit to you in 1 John is that the reason we do crazy things like that is because we do not understand the love of God. We have not embraced the love of God. Now, here's what I know. I'm up against it as I preach this sermon. I know it. As I talk about the love of God, that's what we're going to talk about today, 1 John 4, 7 through 21.1, that God is love, that we love because he first loved us. And I'm going to try to convince you that God loves you.
[00:03:23]
(38 seconds)
A lot of text there. We're going to break it down like this. What love does? Because it moves, it costs, and it frees. Love moves, love costs, and love frees. The first point, if you're taking notes, is love moves. Now, if you've been around our church for a few days, I think you know the whole mantra over the top of our church is love moves. All right, one of you knows it. All right? Love moves, right? That's what we say all the time. And you need to know, I did not come up with that. God did.
[00:08:11]
(32 seconds)
It's what we talk about in this season of Advent. This whole season leading up to Christmas is called Advent in church history. It literally means coming and the expectation of the coming of God. That Christmas, what we celebrate, don't ever get numb to this, is that God put on skin. God entered human history. God showed up as a fully man, fully God.
[00:09:15]
(29 seconds)
God, the one who started the whole universe, broke into human history. And he came and he moved toward us. He did not love us and shout that from heaven. He loved us and came and lived amongst us. This is the meaning of the incarnation. This is the entire season of Advent. And we know as believers, Jesus didn't just come once.
[00:09:50]
(26 seconds)
So our second Advent is looking toward Jesus moving to us once again to make all things right. No more tears, no more pain, no more death. That day is coming, friends. And we look forward to God moving once again. This is inherently what it means to love, is that love moves. That's what we see in verse 9.
[00:10:18]
(21 seconds)
Typically, the way we even share our story, it starts with us. The Bible shares a different sequence. His sequence starts with him. That love was made manifest, not when you figured it out, not when you did some good things, not even when you received Jesus Christ with empty hands of faith. Love was made manifest through God first coming to you 2,000 years ago, before you rebelled and before you memorized scripture. God loved you first.
[00:12:01]
(32 seconds)
Why? Because he knows he's pleased with, he's loved, he's accepted by the Father. This changes everything. When you realized God first moved to you, while you were indifferent, while you didn't go to church and chose to stay home and watch football. While you thought that thing, did that thing, didn't do that thing, and then had a cycle of that for a large portion of your life. God saw that and said, yeah, I'm coming. I'm coming for you.
[00:13:42]
(37 seconds)
And my question is not just do you know and believe. My question is do you live like that is true? Do you look to others and love them, freed up with that amazing love that first came to you? Do you love others with that in view? Or do you use other people as a tool to network with and find some success or perception of success from them to fill some longing that you already have in Jesus Christ?
[00:14:19]
(39 seconds)
Imagine if we knew, if we lived with the idea of God loves us so much, he moved towards us in the midst of our rebellion or our self-righteousness. Imagine how that would free you up to love others because you wouldn't need to use other people. They wouldn't need to be obstacles that you've got to fight over at Black Friday to get that thing to fulfill you this Christmas or to make sure you look like your father of the year to your kids. You would know there's already a father of eternity. And he loves me. And so I can take a breath this Christmas.
[00:14:58]
(32 seconds)
It's not what your father did or didn't do or he wasn't there. It's not your financial state. That's not your biggest problem. Your biggest problem, my biggest problem, you know what it is? It's God's wrath against my sin. That you and I are sinful. And maybe it's against sinfulness and self-righteousness. Maybe it's sinfulness and flat-out rebellion. You and I are sinful. God is utterly, intrinsically, holy, and cannot be in the presence of sin. So what you have is this massive divide.
[00:17:40]
(42 seconds)
"And here's what John just said. Jesus Christ, he's not just a lamb. He's the perfect son of God. And he, on the cross, he provided for you propitiation. And some of you, if you really knew what that meant, you would say amen to that. Thank God for propitiation. That he provided for you in that moment, propitiation, which exchanged the wrath of God for all of your sin, for favor with God. In that moment, on the cross, the perfect son of God shed blood for every sin you've ever committed or will ever commit.
[00:19:39]
(39 seconds)
#LoveMoves
You get to, as John says, over and over and over. The word he uses is abide, abide. You get to abide. Make your home in the presence of God. You get to live in the holiness of God, the love of God. When you're in the shower, when you're in the car, when you're in a church house, when you're in the White House, no matter what house you're in, you're in God's house if you know Jesus Christ.
[00:20:52]
(25 seconds)
And we love not just with love is love, affirmation, encouraging. I just want to sprinkle love all over this room right now. We love with a costly love because it's the love of God. So, friends, listen to me. If you love your spouse, it will cost you. If you love friends, it will cost you. If you love the world who doesn't know God, it will cost you.
[00:23:06]
(32 seconds)
See, what I see in the story of Scripture, here's what love looks like practically. It looks like rupture and reconciliation. Rupture and reconciliation. You wrong someone. And then you have to apologize to that someone. You have to forgive that person. You have to receive that forgiveness. And some of you who've been married a while, you need to say amen to that. Because that's the way anybody stays married. Amen? Is forgive, forgive, apologize, apologize. Don't defend and deflect. Repent and forgive. And guess what? That's true love.
[00:26:08]
(42 seconds)
And those guys will talk about each of these grown men. Strong men will talk about one another and the love they have for one another. And they'll have salty residue coming out of their eyes. Called tears. Because that love is profound. Because that love can change a life. That love can keep lives connected when our whole world is dividing. And that's the kind of love that God loved you with. But not so it could terminate on you. It extends beyond you.
[00:27:57]
(32 seconds)
And I gladly did that. You know why? Because I love that girl. Right? And praise God, it all worked out. So we're still married. Man, love costs you something. I don't know if I could have gotten arrested for illegally downloading songs, but I was willing to risk it. Love costs. And we have the lie that it doesn't.
[00:30:11]
(26 seconds)
And so as soon as somebody doesn't reciprocate our love, file for divorce. As soon as somebody in the church, you said something nice and they didn't say it back to you, go to another church. Why? Because you're believing the lie. Love shouldn't cost me anything. Why does this cost? Why does it hurt so much? I'm out. I'll go find somebody else. And guess what? Wherever you go, there you are. Five years later, you're in the same boat, going to a different church, finding a different marriage. It happens all the time. Love costs.
[00:30:37]
(30 seconds)
There is no fear. His love silences fear. You do not have to be anxious or worried about finding your success or your significance in the love of another. You do not have to be anxious at Christmastime to get the right experience, to get the right gift, to get some kind of achievement and acceptance. John is saying you already have it perfectly in God.
[00:32:26]
(24 seconds)
If you will embrace that, if you will experience that, if you will receive that, you will be freed from fear, freed from anxiety. You will be freed up from using people and you will be able to love people. And it's the people who never get that, who never get the love of the Father, that it's so hard for them to love somebody else.
[00:33:06]
(28 seconds)
I'm going to preach a sermon we love because God first loved us. Amen. Hallelujah. Isn't that sweet? Hey, God is love. And everybody, 70% of y'all are going to be like, I know. I heard this since I was a little baby. And yet I think for your pastor and for even seasoned saints in the room, you don't live like it because if you did, it would change you and it would never become numb and it would never become old. It would never become old hat and you would always be in awe of it. Amen. Enough where you would love other people like he has loved you. It would change everything.
[00:38:38]
(45 seconds)
