The Upside Down Kingdom: Living Beyond Ourselves

The world constantly tells us to look out for ourselves, to make sure our own needs are met first, and to keep all the arrows of our lives pointed inward. But Jesus calls us to something radically different—a kingdom that is upside down from the world’s values. In Matthew 16, Jesus says that whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for His sake will find it. This is not just a clever saying; it’s a call to a completely different way of living, one where we pour ourselves out for others, trusting that God will take care of us.

Life has a way of testing this upside-down way. I’ve experienced deep loss and pain, especially with the passing of my son, and I know what it’s like to wonder how to keep going. But even in the hardest moments, God invites us to trust Him, to keep saying “yes” to His call, and to keep our lives open to others. The temptation is always to turn inward, to let fear, shame, comparison, or a lack of trust keep us from living outwardly. But God’s plan is bigger than our failures or our pain. He takes us as we are, with all our imperfections, and uses us to make a difference in the world.

There are four main roadblocks that keep us from living with our arrows pointed out: fear, shame, comparison, and trust. Fear tells us to protect ourselves because the future is uncertain. Shame reminds us of our failures and tries to convince us we’re not worthy to be used by God. Comparison either makes us feel less than others or prideful, both of which keep us from serving. And a lack of trust in God’s provision keeps us from giving our time, resources, and hearts to others.

But when we overcome these roadblocks, we find that God can use even the smallest “yes” to do incredible things. Whether it’s providing clean water for a village in India or simply being present for someone in need, our lives can have an impact that outlives us. The real tragedy is not moral failure, but losing our sense of meaning and purpose—forgetting our “why.” God’s invitation is to live faithfully, to say “yes” more than we say “no,” and to trust that He will use us, just as we are, to build His upside-down kingdom.

Key Takeaways

• 1. The Paradox of Losing to Find Jesus’ teaching that we must lose our lives to find them is a direct challenge to the world’s self-preserving instincts. True fulfillment comes not from hoarding our time, energy, or resources, but from giving them away for the sake of others and for Christ. This upside-down principle is the doorway to discovering the life God intends for us—one marked by purpose, joy, and deep connection. [45:12]
• 2. God Uses Imperfect People Our past mistakes, failures, and even our loud or awkward personalities do not disqualify us from being used by God. In fact, God delights in taking us as we are, with all our flaws, and weaving our stories into His greater plan. The key is not perfection, but a willingness to say “yes” to God more often than we say “no.” [56:44]
• 3. Overcoming the Four Roadblocks Fear, shame, comparison, and lack of trust are the main barriers that keep us from living outwardly. Each one tempts us to turn inward and protect ourselves, but God calls us to face these obstacles with honesty and courage. When we surrender these roadblocks to Him, we open ourselves to a life of greater impact and freedom. [49:40]
• 4. Legacy Is Built on Outward Living A meaningful life is not measured by what we accumulate or achieve for ourselves, but by what we invest in others and in God’s kingdom. The question to ask is: What am I doing that will outlive me? If our vision is only for ourselves, our legacy will be small, but if we live for others, our impact can ripple through generations. [1:06:20]
• 5. Faithfulness Over Fame or Success At the end of our lives, what matters most is not how impressive we were, but whether we were faithful with what God put in our hands. God is not looking for the most talented or the most popular, but for those who will keep saying “yes” and keep their arrows pointed out. Faithfulness in the small things is what builds the upside-down kingdom of God.
  
  ** [1:12:24]

Youtube Chapters

• [00:00] - Welcome
• [36:52] - Missouri Connections and Humor
• [37:49] - Reflections on Lafayette and Ministry
• [39:02] - The Upside Down Kingdom: Global Perspective
• [40:41] - Preaching in Different Cultures
• [42:17] - Selfishness vs. Selflessness
• [43:09] - Personal Loss and Grief
• [44:38] - The Pull of the World vs. God’s Way
• [45:12] - The Paradox of Losing to Find
• [48:08] - The Danger of Inward Living
• [48:57] - Four Roadblocks to Outward Living
• [49:40] - Roadblock 1: Fear
• [52:27] - Roadblock 2: Shame
• [58:14] - Roadblock 3: Comparison
• [1:04:30] - Roadblock 4: Trust
• [1:06:20] - What Will Outlive You?
• [1:08:30] - Losing Meaning vs. Moral Failure
• [1:10:45] - God Uses Ordinary People
• [1:12:24] - The Call to Faithfulness and Closing Prayer

1. According to Jesus in Matthew 16:24-25, what does it mean to “save” your life, and what does it mean to “lose” it?
2. The sermon described four main roadblocks to living with our “arrows pointed out.” What are these four roadblocks? ([48:57])
3. The speaker shared a personal story about loss and grief. How did this experience challenge his ability to keep living outwardly? ([43:09])
4. What examples did the sermon give of ways God can use even small acts of faithfulness to make a difference? ([01:02:00])

1. Why do you think Jesus’ teaching about losing your life to find it is so “upside down” compared to what the world teaches? ([45:12])
2. How do fear, shame, comparison, and lack of trust specifically keep people from living outwardly for others and for God? ([48:57])
3. The speaker said that God uses imperfect people and that our past mistakes don’t disqualify us. Why is this important for us to remember when we feel unworthy or inadequate? ([56:44])
4. The sermon mentioned that the real tragedy is not moral failure, but losing our sense of meaning and purpose. What does it look like to “lose your why,” and how can we guard against it? ([01:08:30])

1. The world tells us to look out for ourselves first. In what areas of your life do you notice your “arrows” are pointed inward instead of outward? What is one small step you could take this week to change that? ([45:33])
2. Of the four roadblocks (fear, shame, comparison, lack of trust), which one do you struggle with the most? How does it show up in your life, and what would it look like to surrender it to God? ([48:57])
3. The speaker shared about saying “yes” to God more than saying “no.” Is there something God has been nudging you to do, but you’ve been hesitant? What’s holding you back, and what would it look like to take a step of faith? ([56:04])
4. Think about a time when you felt unqualified or imperfect, but God still used you to help someone else. How did that experience shape your view of what God can do through you? ([56:44])
5. The sermon asked, “What are you going to do that outlives you?” What is one way you can invest in others or in God’s kingdom that will have a lasting impact? ([01:06:20])
6. The speaker said that faithfulness is more important than fame or success. What does faithfulness look like in your current season of life? Are there “small things” God is asking you to be faithful in right now? ([01:12:24])
7. When you face loss, pain, or disappointment, what helps you keep your life open to others instead of turning inward? How can the group support you in this? ([43:09])