Understanding Biblical Roles in Christian Marriage

"Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God." That is usually seen as the connecting statement between what Paul had taught earlier in this epistle and what will follow now after it. And some see in this verse a key indicator for how what follows is to be understood. [00:00:52]

Rather, I think, as the consensus historically of biblical interpreters has been, that what the apostle is saying here is that every Christian at some point is called to submission. No one of us is a sovereign of our own. There are all kinds of places where I must submit to the authority and to the leadership of others. [00:02:57]

If Christ is who He said He was, and He was speaking the truth when He said, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me" - that is if the authority of God is given to Jesus, and then Jesus gives that authority to His apostles, then what we’re struggling with in this text is not against some Jewish rabbi’s insights, but we’re struggling against the law of God. [00:04:02]

The analogy continues. "For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church," so that in a manner similar to the way in which Christ is the head of the church, so the man is the head of the wife; and I’ve seen all kinds of games being played with that text by commentators who want to get out from under it. [00:05:34]

Yes, there is a delegated level of authority in the Scriptures. God is supreme. He delegates to Christ, Christ delegates to the apostles, and we are told that all authority in this world ultimately comes from God. And we are called to be submissive to kings and to honor the princes and to obey the civil magistrates and so on. [00:07:50]

Do you see that, in the New Testament where Christ commands His apostles to preach the gospel? They begin to preach the gospel, and the authorities come to them and tell them to stop preaching the gospel; and what do they say? "Should we obey God, or should we obey men?" And the answer is obvious. [00:08:59]

We hear constantly in our culture the myth of the 50/50 marriage. I can’t think of anything worse because in the 50/50 situation where there is no final authority, what fallen human beings tend to do in that situation is to be locked into a perpetual power struggle where everybody is agitating to get fifty-one percent of the stock to get control. [00:11:19]

I know that women have been crying out for the past decades, bleeding about the way in which we have interpreted this passage where men have bought into the myth that the only way God could tell women to submit to husbands is if men are naturally superior to women. That is not true whatsoever. [00:12:01]

Some psychiatric studies were made, and it was discovered that the American male on the average has five times more nightmares than the American woman. You say, "Well what does that have to do with this?" So here’s what it has to do with: The single, number one fear that crops up in nightmares for the American male is the fear of providing for his family. [00:13:45]

I’ve never met a woman who said that she would have a hard time submitting to the authority of her husband if her husband was Jesus. She would never have to be afraid of being exploited by Jesus. She would never be a victim of tyranny. She would never be a victim of abuse. She would never be a battered wife. [00:18:30]

I tend to be a leader more than a follower because I have found precious few people in this world that I am willing to follow, but it is exciting when I find somebody I admire enough and respect enough and trust enough to follow; and one thing is important to me before I follow someone. I don’t want to follow somebody into an ambush. [00:20:26]

Paul goes on to say, "This is the mystery: that men should love their wives as their own bodies because no man ever hated his own flesh, but he nourishes it, and he cherishes it." That’s my job -- to nourish her and to cherish her, and in that Christ is honored, and marriages are made whole. [00:26:25]