Transforming Relationships Through Gratitude and Compassion
Summary
In this season of reflection and preparation for the holidays, we are called to examine our relationships and the dynamics that often complicate them. As we approach Thanksgiving and Christmas, it's crucial to recognize the potential pitfalls that can arise from our differences and the pressures of the season. Our country is divided, and our relationships are distanced, making it easy to fall into mistakes that could lead to regret. The truth is, everyone does life differently, and no one does it perfectly. This diversity in how we live and celebrate can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts, especially during the holidays.
The key to navigating this season lies in the biblical principle of bearing with one another, as outlined in Colossians 3. We are reminded to clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, and to forgive as the Lord forgave us. This call to bear with each other is not just a suggestion but a spiritual mandate that elevates our relationships to a matter of faith. It requires us to bow to our Creator first, which then frees us to bear with others.
Ingratitude is a significant barrier to healthy relationships and a fulfilling holiday season. It discounts the past, devalues the present, and distorts the future. The lie that the next thing will fulfill us is a trap that leads to destruction. Instead, gratitude should be cultivated within us, celebrating the past, making us content in the present, and giving us courage for the future. This cultivation is not passive; it requires intentional effort, much like tending to a garden.
As we prepare for the holidays, let us focus on cultivating gratitude. This involves celebrating God's past faithfulness, being content in the present moment, and having courage for the future. By doing so, we can transform our relationships and experiences, making them more about others and less about ourselves. Let us remember that Jesus bore with us when we were unbearable, and He calls us to do the same with others.
Key Takeaways:
- Bearing with One Another: The art of bearing with each other is rooted in our relationship with God. By bowing to our Creator, we are empowered to bear with others, recognizing that our relationships are a spiritual issue. This principle is essential for navigating the complexities of the holiday season. [09:17]
- The Danger of Ingratitude: Ingratitude discounts the past, devalues the present, and distorts the future. It leads us to believe that the next thing will fulfill us, which is a destructive lie. Cultivating gratitude helps us appreciate what we have and prevents us from making everything about ourselves. [15:50]
- Cultivating Gratitude: Gratitude is not found in external things but is cultivated within. It celebrates the past, makes us content in the present, and gives us courage for the future. This intentional cultivation transforms our perspective and relationships. [27:19]
- Contentment in the Present: Gratitude allows us to be content in the present moment, appreciating the unique experiences and blessings we have. By focusing on the present, we avoid the trap of constantly seeking the next thing to fulfill us. [33:23]
- Courage for the Future: Gratitude for God's past faithfulness gives us courage for the future. It reassures us that the same God who provided in the past will continue to do so, allowing us to face the future with confidence and peace. [35:50]
Youtube Chapters:
[00:00] - Welcome
[01:04] - Holiday Expectations
[02:00] - Family Differences
[04:55] - Complicated Relationships
[05:39] - Family Division
[06:30] - Preparing for the Holidays
[07:21] - Navigating Relationships
[08:09] - The Art of Bearing
[09:17] - Bowing and Bearing
[10:36] - Values and Relationships
[11:51] - Series Overview
[12:38] - Prayer for Gratitude
[13:37] - The Danger of Ingratitude
[14:58] - Ingratitude's Impact
[16:35] - Historical Examples
[17:15] - The Great Lie
[18:27] - Cultivating Gratitude
[19:34] - Gratitude in Relationships
[20:08] - Peace and Gratitude
[21:14] - Gratitude's Source
[21:56] - Rejoicing in All Circumstances
[22:58] - Gratitude Amidst Challenges
[23:45] - The Israelites' Example
[24:25] - The Lie of Fulfillment
[26:09] - Cultivating Gratitude
[27:19] - Celebrating the Past
[28:56] - Remembering God's Works
[30:32] - Gratitude in Daily Life
[31:49] - Finding Bedrock Gratitude
[32:27] - Contentment in the Present
[33:23] - Embracing the Moment
[34:28] - Gratitude in Relationships
[35:50] - Courage for the Future
[36:44] - Avoiding Self-Centeredness
[37:43] - The Gospel's Core Message
[38:18] - Bearing with Yourself
[39:06] - Invitation to Transformation
Study Guide
Bible Study Discussion Guide
Bible Reading:
- Colossians 3:12-14
- 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
- John 14:27
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Observation Questions:
1. According to Colossians 3:12-14, what virtues are believers encouraged to "clothe" themselves with, and how do these virtues relate to bearing with one another? [08:09]
2. In the sermon, what examples were given to illustrate the differences in how families celebrate holidays? How do these differences potentially lead to misunderstandings? [02:00]
3. What does the pastor identify as the dangers of ingratitude, and how does it affect our perception of the past, present, and future? [15:50]
4. How does the sermon describe the process of cultivating gratitude, and what metaphor is used to explain this process? [26:09]
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Interpretation Questions:
1. How does the biblical principle of "bearing with one another" elevate relationships to a spiritual issue, and why is it important to bow to our Creator first? [09:17]
2. In what ways does ingratitude distort our view of the future, and how can this lead to destructive behavior during the holiday season? [16:35]
3. How does the sermon suggest that gratitude can transform our relationships and experiences, especially during the holidays? [27:19]
4. What role does the peace of Christ play in cultivating gratitude according to Colossians 3:15-16, and how does this peace impact our interactions with others? [20:08]
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Application Questions:
1. Reflect on a recent holiday gathering. Were there moments where differences in family traditions led to tension? How might you apply the principle of bearing with one another to improve future interactions? [02:00]
2. Identify an area in your life where ingratitude might be present. How can you actively cultivate gratitude in this area, and what steps will you take to celebrate God's past faithfulness? [15:50]
3. Think of a relationship that has been strained due to differences or misunderstandings. How can you apply the virtues from Colossians 3:12-14 to mend this relationship? [08:09]
4. Consider a time when you felt the need for external validation or fulfillment. How can you shift your focus to cultivate gratitude internally, as suggested in the sermon? [18:27]
5. What practical steps can you take to ensure that your holiday season is more about others and less about yourself? How can you involve your family in this process? [27:19]
6. Reflect on a past experience where you felt God's faithfulness. How does this memory give you courage for the future, and how can you remind yourself of this during challenging times? [35:50]
7. Identify one specific way you can express gratitude to someone in your life this week. How might this act of gratitude impact your relationship with them? [34:28]
Devotional
Day 1: Bearing with One Another: A Spiritual Mandate
In the midst of holiday preparations, the call to bear with one another becomes a spiritual mandate rather than a mere suggestion. This principle, rooted in Colossians 3, emphasizes the importance of clothing ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. By bowing to our Creator first, we are empowered to bear with others, recognizing that our relationships are a matter of faith. This approach helps us navigate the complexities of the holiday season, where differences and pressures can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts. [09:17]
"Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive." (Colossians 3:12-13, ESV)
Reflection: Think of a relationship that feels strained or distant. How can you intentionally practice compassion and patience in this relationship today?
Day 2: The Danger of Ingratitude
Ingratitude poses a significant threat to healthy relationships and a fulfilling holiday season. It discounts the past, devalues the present, and distorts the future, leading us to believe that the next thing will fulfill us. This destructive lie can trap us in a cycle of dissatisfaction and self-centeredness. Cultivating gratitude, on the other hand, helps us appreciate what we have and prevents us from making everything about ourselves. By recognizing the danger of ingratitude, we can begin to shift our focus towards a more grateful and contented mindset. [15:50]
"Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." (1 Thessalonians 5:18, ESV)
Reflection: Identify one area of your life where you feel discontent. How can you practice gratitude in this area today, acknowledging God's presence and provision?
Day 3: Cultivating Gratitude: An Intentional Effort
Gratitude is not found in external things but is cultivated within. It celebrates the past, makes us content in the present, and gives us courage for the future. This intentional cultivation transforms our perspective and relationships, allowing us to focus on others rather than ourselves. By celebrating God's past faithfulness, being content in the present moment, and having courage for the future, we can transform our relationships and experiences during the holiday season. [27:19]
"Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God." (Colossians 3:16, ESV)
Reflection: Reflect on a past experience where you saw God's faithfulness. How can this memory inspire gratitude and courage in your current circumstances?
Day 4: Contentment in the Present: Embracing the Moment
Gratitude allows us to be content in the present moment, appreciating the unique experiences and blessings we have. By focusing on the present, we avoid the trap of constantly seeking the next thing to fulfill us. This contentment helps us embrace the moment and find joy in the here and now, rather than being consumed by what we lack or desire. As we prepare for the holidays, let us focus on cultivating gratitude and contentment in our daily lives. [33:23]
"Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, 'I will never leave you nor forsake you.'" (Hebrews 13:5, ESV)
Reflection: What is one simple joy or blessing in your life today that you can savor and appreciate fully?
Day 5: Courage for the Future: Trusting in God's Faithfulness
Gratitude for God's past faithfulness gives us courage for the future. It reassures us that the same God who provided in the past will continue to do so, allowing us to face the future with confidence and peace. By cultivating gratitude, we can transform our perspective and relationships, making them more about others and less about ourselves. Let us remember that Jesus bore with us when we were unbearable, and He calls us to do the same with others. [35:50]
"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10, ESV)
Reflection: Consider a future challenge or uncertainty you are facing. How can you draw courage from God's past faithfulness to face this situation with trust and peace?
Quotes
[00:08:04]
Here's the scripture that we're going to root this series in, in Colossians 3. I want to read this to you. And here's what, here's what Paul says to us. Therefore, as God's chosen people starts with God, always holy and dearly loved, clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience and what bear with each other and forgive one another.
[00:09:47]
You bow to your creator and you bear with each other. It starts out. Therefore, as God's chosen people, it's established. Once you've bowed to Jesus as your savior, God is your creator. Your response in relationships is to bear with each other.
[00:10:19] (14 seconds)
God's saying the way you treat each other is a spiritual issue. And if you value relationships, you will bear the cost of relationships. And what God's inviting us to is to bear with one another over these next eight weeks.
[00:15:18] (15 seconds)
Here's what ingratitude does in you. Ingratitude discounts the past, devalues the present and distorts your future. Let me unpack that. Ingratitude discounts what's already happened.
[00:17:45] (16 seconds)
The great lie is that the next person thing, job, present event, or experience will, fulfill what is lacking inside of you. The great lie that Satan inserted into God's perfect creation. And that we still wrestle with is the thought that the next thing will solve what's lacking in here.
[00:18:50]
If you're a follower of Jesus, gratitude comes and springs forth from a different place. That's what's different. The lie is that something out there will fill what's empty in here. But for a believer, if you're taking notes, gratitude is not found out there. It's cultivated in here.
[00:21:14] (16 seconds)
When the peace of Christ rules in you, when you've bowed to God as your creator and Jesus as your savior, the peace of Christ lives in here. I don't have to chase it everywhere else. Gratitude is not found out there, but when you're right in here, I don't have to require everybody around me to make it about me.
[00:27:47] (20 seconds)
The gospel says, listen, God will give you his peace through Jesus, but you have to cultivate a spirit. Spirit of gratitude. You're not going to stumble upon it. You're not going to purchase it from Amazon. You got to cultivate it.
[00:37:46] (12 seconds)
See, the core message of the gospel is that Jesus bared with you when you were unbearable. See, when we say bear with one another, he went first. The beauty of being a follower of Jesus, is that God never asked me to go first. He went first. Jesus bore with you when you were unbearable.