Transforming Pain into Gratitude Through God's Love

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I'm sure some of you don't have a great relationship with your dad. Or you haven't had a great relationship with your dad. And we have in this passage, remember this is a continuation of Ephesians 5, where I think it's verse 18, where it says, don't get drunk with wine, but be filled with the Spirit. He's telling us to be filled with the Spirit. This is about being Spirit-filled. And he says, speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, spiritual songs, singing, making melody to the Lord in your heart, always giving thanks to God for everything in Christ Jesus, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. So that's what a Spirit-filled person does, is he submits to authority. And then we talked about wives, submit to your husbands. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church. And now he says, children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. And he says, honor your father and mother. people, you can't be filled with the Spirit and also be filled with hatred. [00:00:00] ( | | )

Okay, so this is about my earthly relationships. Affect my relationship with God. And some of you know my dad died. when I was 12, and honestly, I was glad that he died when I was 12. It was not, it was sad because as a boy just being confused, like my mom was already dead, and now it's like, wow, my stepmom's dead, and now my dad's dead. So there was that sadness of uncertainty, but there was not sadness in that, oh, I'm going to miss him. It was a relief. I had no relationship with my dad. He never wanted me. He gave me up for adoption, but my grandma took me away, and then years later forced him to take me back, and so he never wanted me, and so we honestly never had a single conversation, not even like simple, like, did you like the meal? Like nothing. [00:01:25] (70 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)


It was only when I would do something wrong, and my only memories are, you know, things that are ingrained in my mind were just times when he, you know, like one time getting so angry that he tied me with ropes to a tree in the backyard, and just started grabbing branches, and just going at me, and, you know, where you're just screaming, but you can't breathe, and you're like, you know, just screaming out in Chinese, please stop. Please stop. Please. And then you just can't even breathe anymore, and then you're just left there, and it's getting dark, and you're just sitting there with welts all over your body going, gosh, do I try to untie myself? Am I allowed back in the house? You know, what do I do? This is what I remember. Him chasing me around the house and everything. You know, and just everything I did was a disappointment. Being born was a disappointment. [00:02:34] (61 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)


And so there's no, like, sugarcoating. I don't come up here and go, oh, I had a great dad or whatever. But I look at this passage, and it's honor. Somehow even amidst that, I can't hold on to, like, a bitterness towards that. The Bible says that the spirit-filled person thanks God always and for everything. That doesn't mean I'm fake and I go, wow, he was a great dad. He wasn't a great father for my standards. Probably for anyone's standards. But I am thankful. I'm very thankful for my childhood. I know it sounds like brutal or whatever else, but I don't know how to explain it. I can genuinely tell you I'm thankful. I'm thankful for the way I was raised and I wouldn't have my life any other way. [00:03:37] (79 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)


I don't know how the Holy Spirit does that in me, but I can tell you, I'm like, wow, that was cool. I mean, it's fine. It really is because, I don't know, he really, God really became a father to me. Secondly, there were men in the church who, who became like, maybe not became like dads, but I could watch them and go, oh, that's what I want to be. He got me to taste it on the other end of being a dad myself. Like somehow all of that could be, I'm like amazed. I'm like, God, how could you wash that away? And even my wife will tell you this day, that was the biggest shock to her. Knowing how I was raised and the moment from the moment Rachel was born, she goes, that was the weirdest thing to watch. [00:04:55] (65 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)


You like immediately knew how to love her automatically. naturally supernaturally had this love and tenderness towards her i go yeah i have no clue how that happened so i'm really grateful for all that thank you for that and so i just encourage you as as i know there's broken broken relationships in this room and and we're all human and there's things i'll do as a dad that are just not great um this just uh you know there's we're human but it's so important if we want to be spirit-filled people we're gonna have to let go and we have to learn to thank god for everything always giving thanks for everything in christ jesus
[00:06:01] (63 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)


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