Transforming Hearts: Navigating Sexual Desires in Faith

Summary

### Summary

Today, we delved into the topic of sex in a broken world, building on last week's discussion about God's divine design for sex. We began by revisiting the creation story to understand God's purposes for sex: multiplication, adoration, and recreation. However, we acknowledged that this good gift has often led to sin and suffering, not because of the broken world around us, but due to the brokenness within us. This internal brokenness is what Jesus addresses in Mark 7, where He emphasizes that sin originates from within our hearts, not from external factors.

We explored why our hearts cannot be trusted, identifying three primary reasons: our hearts mistake wants for needs, turn desires into demands, and transform expectations into entitlements. These misguided inclinations lead us to depend on things other than God, causing us to misplace our dependencies and ultimately leading to destructive behaviors.

We examined how our hearts' desires can become demands, especially when confused with love. True biblical love is a selfless choice, unlike desire, which is self-centered and seeks to have its way. This distinction is crucial for understanding how to navigate relationships and sexual desires in a way that honors God.

We also discussed the story of King David's sin with Bathsheba as a case study of how unchecked desires can lead to grave consequences. David's story illustrates the importance of God exposing our hearts, inviting us into confession, and ultimately transforming us. David's heartfelt confession in Psalm 51 serves as a model for us to seek God's forgiveness and ask for a new heart.

Finally, we emphasized the importance of repentance, not just confession. True repentance involves a change of course, turning away from sin and towards God. This process is essential for experiencing the new heart that God promises, which is our only hope in overcoming sexual sin and temptation in this broken world.

### Key Takeaways

1. The Origin of Sin: Jesus teaches that sin originates from within our hearts, not from external factors. This understanding shifts the focus from blaming our environment to examining our internal desires and inclinations. Recognizing this helps us address the root cause of our struggles with sin. [03:35]

2. Misguided Desires: Our hearts often mistake wants for needs, leading us to depend on things other than God. This misplaced dependency can result in addictions and destructive behaviors. Understanding this helps us to critically evaluate our desires and align them with God's will. [06:23]

3. Desire vs. Love: The world often confuses desire with love, but true biblical love is a selfless choice, while desire is self-centered. Recognizing this distinction helps us navigate relationships and sexual desires in a way that honors God and seeks the good of others. [11:26]

4. The Role of Confession: Confession is a crucial step in addressing our sin. It involves owning up to our wrongdoings and seeking God's forgiveness. This process brings clarity to our sins and allows God to begin the work of transformation in our hearts. [20:57]

5. The Importance of Repentance: Confession without repentance is incomplete. True repentance involves a change of course, turning away from sin and towards God. This act of repentance is essential for experiencing the new heart that God promises, which is our only hope in overcoming sin. [29:04]

### YouTube Chapters

[0:00] - Welcome
[01:12] - Recap of Last Week
[02:19] - Jesus and the Pharisees
[03:35] - The Origin of Sin
[05:09] - The Deceptive Heart
[06:23] - Wants vs. Needs
[07:37] - Signs of Dependency
[10:11] - Desires into Demands
[11:26] - Desire vs. Love
[12:42] - Sacrifice vs. Expectation
[14:01] - Entitlement and Blame
[15:26] - Submission to the Lord
[16:49] - The Story of David
[19:40] - Exposure and Conviction
[20:57] - Invitation to Confession
[22:18] - David's Heartfelt Confession
[25:15] - Practical Steps for Repentance
[29:04] - The Importance of Repentance
[30:30] - Receiving a New Heart
[32:25] - Closing Prayer and Hope

Study Guide

### Bible Study Discussion Guide

#### Bible Reading
1. Mark 7:20-23: "He went on: 'What comes out of a person is what defiles them. For it is from within, out of a person’s heart, that evil thoughts come—sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. All these evils come from inside and defile a person.'"
2. Psalm 51:1-4, 10: "Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight; so you are right in your verdict and justified when you judge. Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

#### Observation Questions
1. According to Mark 7:20-23, where does Jesus say sin originates from, and what are some examples He gives? ([03:35])
2. In Psalm 51, what does David ask God to do for him after acknowledging his sin? ([22:18])
3. What are the three primary reasons mentioned in the sermon for why our hearts cannot be trusted? ([06:23])
4. How does the story of King David and Bathsheba illustrate the consequences of unchecked desires? ([16:49])

#### Interpretation Questions
1. Why is it significant that Jesus emphasizes sin originates from within our hearts rather than from external factors? How does this change our approach to dealing with sin? ([03:35])
2. How does David’s confession in Psalm 51 serve as a model for us in seeking God’s forgiveness and transformation? ([22:18])
3. What is the difference between desire and love as explained in the sermon, and why is this distinction important for navigating relationships? ([11:26])
4. How does the concept of repentance go beyond mere confession, and why is it essential for experiencing a new heart? ([29:04])

#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on a time when you blamed external factors for your sin. How can you shift your focus to examining your internal desires and inclinations? ([03:35])
2. Identify a want in your life that you have mistaken for a need. What steps can you take to realign this desire with God’s will? ([06:23])
3. Think about a relationship where you have confused desire with love. How can you practice selfless love in that relationship this week? ([11:26])
4. Have you ever experienced the conviction of the Holy Spirit revealing sin in your heart? How did you respond, and what can you do to be more open to this conviction in the future? ([19:40])
5. What practical steps can you take to move from confession to true repentance in your life? Consider a specific sin you need to turn away from and how you can change your course. ([29:04])
6. How can you create a habit of regular confession and accountability in your life? Who can you trust to share your struggles with and seek support? ([26:26])
7. Reflect on the promise of receiving a new heart from God. How does this promise give you hope in your battle with sin and temptation? What can you do to embrace this promise daily? ([30:30])

Devotional

Day 1: The Origin of Sin
Description: Jesus teaches that sin originates from within our hearts, not from external factors. This understanding shifts the focus from blaming our environment to examining our internal desires and inclinations. Recognizing this helps us address the root cause of our struggles with sin. Jesus' words in Mark 7 remind us that the true battle against sin is fought within our hearts. By acknowledging this, we can begin to seek God's help in transforming our inner lives.

Our hearts are often deceptive, leading us to believe that our sinful actions are caused by external circumstances. However, Jesus makes it clear that it is our internal brokenness that leads to sin. This realization calls us to a deeper level of self-examination and dependence on God for heart transformation. By focusing on our internal state, we can better understand the true nature of our struggles and seek God's grace to overcome them. [03:35]

Jeremiah 17:9-10 (ESV): "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 'I the Lord search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds.'"

Reflection: What internal desires or inclinations have you been blaming on external factors? How can you invite God to transform these areas of your heart today?

Day 2: Misguided Desires
Description: Our hearts often mistake wants for needs, leading us to depend on things other than God. This misplaced dependency can result in addictions and destructive behaviors. Understanding this helps us to critically evaluate our desires and align them with God's will. When we confuse our wants with our needs, we place undue importance on things that cannot truly satisfy us, leading to a cycle of unfulfilled desires and harmful actions.

By recognizing the difference between wants and needs, we can begin to realign our priorities and seek fulfillment in God alone. This shift in perspective allows us to break free from dependencies that lead to destructive behaviors and instead find true satisfaction in our relationship with God. Evaluating our desires through the lens of God's will helps us to live more purposefully and in alignment with His plan for our lives. [06:23]

Psalm 37:4 (ESV): "Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart."

Reflection: What are some wants that you have mistaken for needs in your life? How can you begin to realign these desires with God's will today?

Day 3: Desire vs. Love
Description: The world often confuses desire with love, but true biblical love is a selfless choice, while desire is self-centered. Recognizing this distinction helps us navigate relationships and sexual desires in a way that honors God and seeks the good of others. True love, as defined by the Bible, involves putting the needs and well-being of others above our own desires. This selfless love is a reflection of God's love for us and is the foundation for healthy, God-honoring relationships.

In contrast, desire is focused on fulfilling our own wants and can lead to selfish and harmful behaviors. By understanding the difference between love and desire, we can approach our relationships with a heart that seeks to serve and honor others, rather than simply seeking to satisfy our own desires. This perspective helps us to build stronger, more meaningful connections that reflect God's love. [11:26]

1 Corinthians 13:4-5 (ESV): "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful."

Reflection: In what ways have you confused desire with love in your relationships? How can you practice selfless, biblical love in your interactions with others today?

Day 4: The Role of Confession
Description: Confession is a crucial step in addressing our sin. It involves owning up to our wrongdoings and seeking God's forgiveness. This process brings clarity to our sins and allows God to begin the work of transformation in our hearts. Confession is not just about admitting our faults, but also about recognizing the impact of our sins and taking responsibility for them. This act of humility opens the door for God's grace and healing in our lives.

By confessing our sins, we acknowledge our need for God's forgiveness and invite Him to cleanse and renew our hearts. This process of confession and repentance is essential for spiritual growth and transformation. It allows us to experience the fullness of God's mercy and to walk in greater freedom and righteousness. [20:57]

1 John 1:9 (ESV): "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

Reflection: What sins do you need to confess to God today? How can you take responsibility for your actions and seek His forgiveness and transformation?

Day 5: The Importance of Repentance
Description: Confession without repentance is incomplete. True repentance involves a change of course, turning away from sin and towards God. This act of repentance is essential for experiencing the new heart that God promises, which is our only hope in overcoming sin. Repentance goes beyond merely acknowledging our sins; it requires a deliberate decision to change our behavior and align our lives with God's will.

Repentance is a continuous process of turning away from sin and seeking to live in obedience to God. It involves a commitment to pursue righteousness and to rely on God's strength to overcome temptation. By embracing repentance, we open ourselves to the transformative work of the Holy Spirit, who empowers us to live in accordance with God's purposes. [29:04]

Acts 3:19 (ESV): "Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord."

Reflection: In what areas of your life do you need to repent and turn back to God? What steps can you take today to begin this process of transformation and renewal?

Quotes

### Quotes for Outreach

1. "When Adam and Eve turned from God, they decided to send their lives around the desires of what? Their heart. And ever since then, we've been doing the same exact thing, putting ourselves, putting our own desires at the center of our own world. That's why part two of this discussion is all about looking inside of ourselves. Because what we ultimately need is for God to expose those desires that lie deep within our hearts. And we need for him to give us a new heart." [05:09] (27 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

2. "Listening to our hearts, following our hearts, trusting them, it's not the way to find freedom from sexual sin. It's not the way to have power over sexual temptation. No, the only way that you or I can find that freedom is by receiving a new heart. It's by receiving a new heart and the good news is family one has already been promised to us." [15:26] (19 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

3. "Those who truly love you will be eager to sacrifice for you. They'll be willing to wait for you. They'll be willing to serve you. Those who simply desire you will expect you to sacrifice for them." [12:42] (12 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

4. "God's promise remains true. I will give you a new heart, He says. Are you ready to receive it? I want to ask you, if you would, just bow your heads and close your eyes right where you're at. Those of you who are here and feeling that conviction, that tug of the Holy Spirit. You may not even be able to really verbalize what that feels like right now, but you know that you need to confess and to repent." [30:30] (32 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

5. "God's Word tells us that through this process of prayer and of confession and of repentance, that we are being transformed. Not that we might be transformed, not that we will be transformed, but that we are being transformed into the image of Christ. That's what that means. That even though we may feel like we are in the midst of a battle, that breakthrough is coming. Breakthrough is coming because God's promise is true." [32:25] (26 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

### Quotes for Members

1. "The first reason why our hearts cannot be trusted is that our hearts often mistake wants as needs. Our hearts often mistake wants for needs. This simple truth is what's led to just about every addiction ever. Okay? It is a belief. That is often a result of a repeated behavior that tricks our brains into thinking that this thing that we once wanted is now actually needed for our survival." [06:23] (24 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

2. "When we mistake our want for sex as a need for sex, we set ourselves on a path towards destruction. And it's not because sex is a bad thing. We talked a lot last week about sex being a good thing. But even a good thing can become a bad thing when that good thing becomes a ruling thing in our hearts. We become to depend on it." [07:37] (60 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

3. "When we confuse our wants for needs, our desires, they turn into demands. Demands that we then place onto others. Often with that very same, motivation to have that need filled. And this is why our hearts cannot be trusted. Because they'll turn our desires into demands. And those demands can and have and will result in the pain and the suffering and the struggles that we've been talking about throughout this series." [10:11] (25 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

4. "When expectations turn to entitlement is when you start seeing the blame shifted for sexual sin see it's never the fault of the person it's always the fault of the people around them because they didn't get what was owed to them right they didn't get what they felt like they deserved so they shift the blame on others this is why you'll hear things like well you know she was asking for it with the way that she dressed." [14:01] (24 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

5. "Confession without course correction is empty words. It's like the New Year's resolutions we make. Unless there's actually action that follows, it's just hollow words, meaningless things. See, family, when we confess, we admit that what we did was wrong, that what we did was sinful, that it went against God's design, His plan, His desire for our life. But when we repent, we choose to turn from that sin, and we choose to chase after the things of the Lord." [29:04] (30 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

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Transcript

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