The Spiritual Power of Asking in Relationships

 

Summary

In today's reflection, we delve into the profound spirituality of asking, a concept that is central to the teachings of Jesus, particularly in the Sermon on the Mount. We explore the right and wrong ways to relate to others, emphasizing the importance of asking rather than condemning, manipulating, or imposing our will on others. This approach respects the autonomy and dignity of each individual, aligning with the Kingdom of God where asking is a fundamental principle.

Dallas Willard's insights from "The Divine Conspiracy" illuminate how asking is not just a method of communication but a way to honor the kingdom of others. When we ask, we stand with others in a domain of mutual respect and freedom, without force or coercion. This creates a unique atmosphere of togetherness, which is the essence of the Kingdom of God. Asking unites, while demands and condemnation separate.

The act of asking is a reflection of God's own nature. In the Bible, God often asks questions, inviting us into a relationship rather than imposing His will. Jesus, too, asked over 160 questions, demonstrating humility and respect for others' autonomy. This approach fosters genuine relationships, where asking and receiving become a joyful and loving way of life.

Prayer, as an extension of this dynamic, is a proper way for persons to interact with God. It is a way to bring our kingdom into the presence of God's kingdom, honoring His will while being honest about our own. The power of asking is so significant that it can make people uncomfortable, yet it is the Great Law of the spiritual world, through which things are accomplished in cooperation with God.

As we reflect on this, consider who you might ask something of today. Approach your relationships with a balance of seeking to bless and give, rather than just using others. When others ask of you, respond with a rhetoric of charity, seeking to understand and help. This practice not only enriches our relationships with others but also deepens our connection with God.

Key Takeaways:

- Asking is a central principle in the Kingdom of God, fostering mutual respect and freedom. It unites rather than separates, creating an atmosphere of togetherness that is essential for human flourishing. [03:28]

- God's nature is reflected in the act of asking. Throughout scripture, God and Jesus ask questions, inviting us into a relationship rather than imposing their will. This approach honors our autonomy and fosters genuine connections. [08:23]

- Prayer is an extension of the dynamic of asking, a way to interact with God that respects His will while being honest about our own. It is a powerful tool for accomplishing things in cooperation with God. [06:26]

- The power of asking can make people uncomfortable, yet it is a fundamental force of the universe. It is the Great Law of the spiritual world, through which we can bring our little kingdoms into the kingdoms of others. [10:33]

- In our relationships, strive to ask with humility and respect, seeking to bless and give rather than use. Respond to others' requests with a rhetoric of charity, aiming to understand and help, enriching both our human and divine connections. [09:46]

Youtube Chapters:

[00:00] - Welcome
[00:11] - Introduction with Baxter
[00:23] - Special Invitation
[00:39] - Sermon on the Mount
[00:54] - Wrong Ways to Relate
[01:20] - The Therapeutic Triad
[02:04] - Dallas Willard's Insight
[02:40] - Ask, Seek, Knock
[03:12] - Honoring the Kingdom
[03:41] - The Power of Asking
[04:12] - Respecting the Heart's Latch
[05:04] - Togetherness in the Kingdom
[06:08] - Prayer as Interaction
[07:29] - The Difference Between Asking and Using
[08:54] - Humility in Asking
[09:33] - Applying the Rhetoric of Charity
[10:53] - Invitation to Prayer Series

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide

Bible Reading:
1. Matthew 7:7-8 (NIV) - "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened."
2. Genesis 3:9 (NIV) - "But the Lord God called to the man, 'Where are you?'"
3. John 4:7 (NIV) - "When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, 'Will you give me a drink?'"

Observation Questions:
1. What are the three actions Jesus instructs us to take in Matthew 7:7-8, and what are the promised outcomes of each action?
2. How does the interaction between God and Adam in Genesis 3:9 demonstrate the concept of asking rather than imposing?
3. In John 4:7, why is Jesus' request to the Samaritan woman significant in the context of cultural norms at the time? [08:54]
4. According to the sermon, what is the difference between asking and using, and how does this distinction affect relationships? [07:51]

Interpretation Questions:
1. How does the act of asking, as described in Matthew 7:7-8, reflect the nature of God's kingdom and our relationship with others? [02:40]
2. In what ways does God's question to Adam in Genesis 3:9 illustrate His respect for human autonomy and invitation to relationship?
3. How does Jesus' approach to the Samaritan woman in John 4:7 exemplify humility and respect in asking, and what can we learn from this interaction? [08:54]
4. Why might the power of asking make people uncomfortable, and how does this discomfort relate to the spiritual significance of asking? [06:42]

Application Questions:
1. Reflect on a recent situation where you imposed your will on someone instead of asking. How could you have approached it differently to honor their autonomy? [03:12]
2. Identify a relationship in your life where asking could foster greater mutual respect and freedom. What specific request could you make to strengthen this relationship? [05:04]
3. Consider a time when someone asked something of you, and you responded with suspicion rather than charity. How can you shift your perspective to be more open and helpful in the future? [09:46]
4. How can you incorporate the practice of asking into your prayer life, ensuring that it aligns with both your will and God's will? [06:26]
5. Think of a person you often try to use rather than genuinely ask for help or support. What steps can you take to change this dynamic and build a more authentic connection? [08:37]
6. How can you create an atmosphere of togetherness in your community or family by practicing the art of asking rather than demanding or condemning? [05:22]
7. Reflect on a situation where you felt uncomfortable asking for help. What can you do to overcome this discomfort and embrace the power of asking as a spiritual practice? [06:42]

Devotional

Day 1: Asking as a Path to Unity
Asking is a central principle in the Kingdom of God, fostering mutual respect and freedom. It unites rather than separates, creating an atmosphere of togetherness that is essential for human flourishing. When we ask, we acknowledge the autonomy and dignity of others, aligning ourselves with the values of the Kingdom of God. This approach contrasts with condemning or imposing our will, which often leads to division and discord. By embracing the power of asking, we create a space where mutual respect and freedom can thrive, allowing for genuine connections and community. [03:28]

"Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." (Philippians 2:4, ESV)

Reflection: Who in your life can you approach with a question today, seeking to understand and unite rather than divide?


Day 2: Reflecting God's Nature Through Questions
God's nature is reflected in the act of asking. Throughout scripture, God and Jesus ask questions, inviting us into a relationship rather than imposing their will. This approach honors our autonomy and fosters genuine connections. By asking questions, God demonstrates humility and respect for our freedom, encouraging us to engage in a meaningful dialogue. This method of interaction not only deepens our relationship with God but also sets an example for how we should relate to others, valuing their perspectives and inviting them into a shared journey. [08:23]

"And the Lord God called to the man and said to him, 'Where are you?'" (Genesis 3:9, ESV)

Reflection: How can you incorporate the practice of asking questions into your interactions today, reflecting God's nature in your relationships?


Day 3: Prayer as a Dynamic Interaction
Prayer is an extension of the dynamic of asking, a way to interact with God that respects His will while being honest about our own. It is a powerful tool for accomplishing things in cooperation with God. Through prayer, we bring our desires and concerns into the presence of God, aligning our will with His and seeking His guidance. This practice not only strengthens our relationship with God but also empowers us to live in accordance with His purposes, trusting in His wisdom and provision. [06:26]

"Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving." (Colossians 4:2, ESV)

Reflection: What specific area of your life can you bring to God in prayer today, seeking His guidance and aligning your will with His?


Day 4: The Transformative Power of Asking
The power of asking can make people uncomfortable, yet it is a fundamental force of the universe. It is the Great Law of the spiritual world, through which we can bring our little kingdoms into the kingdoms of others. By asking, we open ourselves to the possibility of transformation, inviting others to share in our journey and offering our support in theirs. This practice challenges us to step out of our comfort zones, embracing vulnerability and trust as we seek to build meaningful connections and foster mutual growth. [10:33]

"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you." (Matthew 7:7, ESV)

Reflection: What is one area of your life where you feel hesitant to ask for help or guidance? How can you take a step towards asking today?


Day 5: Humility and Charity in Asking
In our relationships, strive to ask with humility and respect, seeking to bless and give rather than use. Respond to others' requests with a rhetoric of charity, aiming to understand and help, enriching both our human and divine connections. This approach encourages us to prioritize the well-being of others, fostering an environment of love and support. By practicing humility and charity in our interactions, we not only strengthen our relationships but also reflect the values of the Kingdom of God, promoting peace and unity in our communities. [09:46]

"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." (Philippians 2:3, ESV)

Reflection: How can you practice humility and charity in your interactions today, seeking to bless and support those around you?

Quotes


When we stand in the kingdom of God our approach to influencing others for their good as well as our own will be simply to ask now that's that's the right way to go about it that the wrong way is condemnation engineering judging other people condemning them distancing separating manipulating violating their Kingdom and then the way to honor the kingdom is to ask ask them to change and help them in any way they ask of us. [00:03:01]

We respect and never forget that the latch of the heart is within we are glad for the fact and would not override it well wouldn't we we can gently but persistently keep our hopeful expectation before them and at the same time before God as asking is indeed the Great Law of the spiritual world through which things are accomplished in cooperation with God and yet in harmony with the freedom and worth of every individual. [00:04:12]

When I ask someone Dallas wres to do or to be or to give something I stand with that person in the domain of a constraint without force or necessitation we are together a request by its very nature unites a demand by its very nature separates and of course so does condemnation and rejection and pressure and pushing on somebody else it is this peculiar atmosphere of togetherness that characterizes the kingdom and is indeed what human beings were created to thrive in. [00:04:46]

So this notion of asking is Central to the kingdom because you remember to have a kingdom means you have a will and there is a range of your effective will you have dominion and and God wants that to be honored and that is honored when we ask that's how I bring my will before yours in a way that honors you my kingdom and your kingdom can now merge together. [00:05:30]

Prayer is nothing but a proper way for persons to interact so this Dynamic of the request of asking which is bringing my kingdom into the presence of your kingdom in a way that honors yours and is honest about mine that extends to other people and it extends to God that's why prayer is just simply an extension of what it essentially means to live in honor in this great Kingdom. [00:06:10]

The power of asking is so great it may make many people uncomfortable don't you know a people who will go considerably out of their way to avoid someone who is apt to ask them for something it may even be somebody who they don't know will never meet again but they do not wish to feel the power of the request who really enjoys eating a sandwich in front of the family dog no matter that it is your favorite sandwich which you have lovingly prepared as a tiny little vacation with your book in a quiet and pleasant place here is the face the eyes perhaps a paw on your knee you know the rest you are up up against a fundamental force of the universe. [00:06:46]

There is a difference between asking and using very striking if you go back to Genesis and God interacts with the human beings that he creates the first thing he does is to bless and then the next thing he does is to give he gives Dominion this wonderful opportunity to be powerful for the good and then after the fall when Adam hides God asks God is the great asker in scripture Jesus asks by one count over 160 questions of people because God honors our kingdom Adam where are you in other words wouldn't you like to come home but he puts it in the form of a question. [00:07:45]

Asking unites very striking uh when Jesus is talking to the Samaritan woman at the well he begins by asking her if she could let him have some water and that was a humble thing for a Jewish rabbi to ask something of a Samaritan woman that was very unusual I think of n will often talk about two of her friends that were at odds with each other for a long time what began to heal their relationship was one person asked the other for a significant favor we would take about an hour and there was something about the humility and the connection of just a simple honest request that could be rejected so it's kind of vulnerability to it. [00:08:13]

As you ask in your relationships with people is there about that right proportion of I seek to bless and I seek to give I'm not just a user but then I ask here's what I would love to have in a way that will honor their Kingdom and then I don't punish them or reject them if I don't get the answer that I want and then of course as people ask me I apply to that what is sometimes called a rutic of Charity and not of Suspicion. [00:09:21]

The power of the ask is great because it is the Great Law of the kingdom it is how we bring our little kingdoms into the kingdoms of others it begins with people ask and seek and knock and then we'll see how of course this applies directly to God prayer is the great uh way that life works in the kingdom of God make it a golden rule day. [00:10:27]

Prayer is an extension of the dynamic of asking, a way to interact with God that respects His will while being honest about our own. It is a powerful tool for accomplishing things in cooperation with God. [00:06:08]

In our relationships, strive to ask with humility and respect, seeking to bless and give rather than use. Respond to others' requests with a rhetoric of charity, aiming to understand and help, enriching both our human and divine connections. [00:09:33]

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Transcript
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