Spiritual Warfare: Strengthening Marriage Through Unity

 

Summary

Marriage is a beautiful union, yet it often faces spiritual warfare. Just as thunder is made in heaven, so are the challenges that come with marriage. To nurture a healthy marriage, three crucial actions are necessary: planting seeds, removing weeds, and killing the snake. Planting seeds involves investing time, attention, and love into the relationship. Removing weeds means addressing the small irritations and distractions that can grow into larger issues. However, the most significant task is to kill the snake, which represents the spiritual attacks and generational curses that can infiltrate a marriage.

In the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve failed to kill the snake, leading to their downfall. Today, many marriages face similar challenges, with spouses standing idly by as their partners are tormented by spiritual snakes. These snakes can manifest as generational curses, rejection, depression, or lust. The key is to recognize that the spouse is not the enemy; the snake is. Spiritual warfare in marriage requires unity against the common enemy, not against each other.

The story of David and Goliath illustrates this principle. David entered a battle that wasn't his own, fighting for his brothers and defeating Goliath. In marriage, we must come alongside our spouse to face their Goliaths, sharing their battles as our own. This requires dealing with our own issues first, as David did with the lion and the bear, before helping our spouse with theirs.

It's essential to attack the issue, not the person. Affirm the person while destroying the enemy. Different battles require different strategies, and God can use various means to bring deliverance. Whether through prayer, praise, or unconventional methods, the focus should be on the presence of the Holy Spirit rather than the tools we use.

Ultimately, the goal is to break generational curses and stand united against the enemy. By putting down the stones of blame and picking up the mirror of self-reflection, we can address the issues within ourselves and fight the true enemy together. Victory in marriage comes from recognizing the real battle and standing firm in faith and unity.

Key Takeaways:

1. Planting Seeds and Removing Weeds: Invest time and love into your marriage by planting seeds of kindness and attention. Simultaneously, remove the weeds of small irritations and distractions that can grow into larger issues. This dual approach nurtures a healthy relationship. [00:46]

2. Killing the Snake: Recognize that the real enemy in marriage is not your spouse but the spiritual snakes that attack the relationship. These can manifest as generational curses, rejection, or lust. Stand united with your spouse to defeat these spiritual enemies. [03:03]

3. Facing Goliaths Together: Just as David fought Goliath for his brothers, come alongside your spouse to face their Goliaths. Share their battles as your own, understanding that marriage is a covenant where everything is shared, including struggles. [12:05]

4. Self-Reflection Before Helping Others: Before addressing your spouse's issues, deal with your own. Like David, who defeated the lion and the bear, ensure you have faced your personal challenges before helping your spouse with theirs. [15:11]

5. Attack the Issue, Not the Person: Affirm your spouse while addressing the real enemy. Different battles require different strategies, and God can use various means to bring deliverance. Focus on the presence of the Holy Spirit rather than the tools used. [26:47]

Youtube Chapters:

- [00:00] - Welcome
- [00:46] - Planting Seeds in Relationships
- [02:04] - Removing Weeds from Marriage
- [03:03] - Killing the Snake: Spiritual Warfare
- [04:01] - Generational Curses and Rejection
- [05:38] - Depression and Spiritual Warfare
- [06:53] - Identifying the Real Enemy
- [08:25] - David and Goliath: A Lesson for Marriage
- [12:05] - Facing Goliaths Together
- [13:24] - Helping Without Hurting
- [14:12] - Dealing with Personal Issues
- [15:11] - Self-Reflection in Marriage
- [18:43] - The Importance of Grace
- [22:18] - Affirming the Person, Attacking the Issue
- [26:47] - Different Strategies for Different Battles
- [31:44] - Prayer and Restoration in Marriage

Study Guide

### Bible Study Discussion Guide

#### Bible Reading
1. 1 Samuel 17:32-50 - The story of David and Goliath, illustrating the importance of facing battles together and recognizing the true enemy.
2. Genesis 3:1-6 - The account of Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, highlighting the failure to address the serpent and its consequences.
3. Matthew 7:3-5 - Jesus' teaching on self-reflection before addressing others' faults.

#### Observation Questions
1. What are the three crucial actions mentioned in the sermon that are necessary for nurturing a healthy marriage? [00:46]
2. How does the story of David and Goliath relate to the concept of facing challenges in marriage? [12:05]
3. What does the sermon suggest is the real enemy in marriage, and how should couples address it? [03:03]
4. How does the sermon use the story of Adam and Eve to illustrate the importance of dealing with spiritual attacks in marriage? [02:04]

#### Interpretation Questions
1. In what ways does the sermon suggest that spiritual warfare can manifest in a marriage, and how can couples stand united against these challenges? [03:03]
2. How does the sermon interpret the story of David and Goliath as a metaphor for supporting one's spouse in their personal battles? [12:05]
3. What is the significance of self-reflection before helping others, as discussed in the sermon, and how does it relate to the teachings of Jesus in Matthew 7:3-5? [15:11]
4. How does the sermon propose different strategies for different battles, and what role does the Holy Spirit play in these strategies? [26:47]

#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on your own marriage or relationships. What seeds of kindness and attention can you plant this week to nurture them? [00:46]
2. Identify any "weeds" in your relationship that need to be addressed. How can you work with your partner to remove these distractions or irritations? [00:46]
3. Consider a "snake" or spiritual challenge you and your spouse might be facing. How can you stand united to address this issue together? [03:03]
4. Think about a personal "lion" or "bear" you need to deal with before helping your spouse with their challenges. What steps can you take to address this personal issue? [15:11]
5. How can you affirm your spouse while addressing the real enemy in your relationship? What practical steps can you take to ensure your focus is on the issue, not the person? [26:47]
6. Reflect on a recent conflict with your spouse. Did you pick up a stone or a mirror? How can you practice more self-reflection in future conflicts? [22:18]
7. What unconventional strategies might God be calling you to use in your marriage to overcome challenges? How can you remain open to the guidance of the Holy Spirit in these situations? [28:18]

Devotional

I'm ready to provide the 5-day devotional based on the steps outlined. Here it is:

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Day 1: Cultivating a Garden of Love
To nurture a healthy marriage, it is essential to invest time, attention, and love into the relationship, akin to planting seeds in a garden. This involves acts of kindness, thoughtful gestures, and consistent communication that strengthen the bond between spouses. Equally important is the removal of weeds—small irritations and distractions that, if left unaddressed, can grow into larger issues. By tending to these aspects, couples can create a flourishing environment for their relationship to thrive. [00:46]

"Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up." (Galatians 6:9, ESV)

Reflection: What is one small act of kindness you can do for your spouse today to plant seeds of love in your marriage?


Day 2: Identifying and Defeating Spiritual Snakes
In marriage, the real enemy is not your spouse but the spiritual snakes that attack the relationship. These can manifest as generational curses, rejection, or lust, and they require a united front to defeat. Recognizing these spiritual attacks is crucial, as is standing together with your spouse to combat them. By focusing on the true enemy, couples can strengthen their bond and protect their marriage from spiritual warfare. [03:03]

"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places." (Ephesians 6:12, ESV)

Reflection: What spiritual "snake" do you need to confront in your marriage, and how can you and your spouse stand united against it today?


Day 3: Facing Goliaths Together
Marriage is a covenant where everything is shared, including struggles. Just as David fought Goliath for his brothers, spouses are called to come alongside each other to face their Goliaths. This means sharing in each other's battles and supporting one another through challenges. By doing so, couples can strengthen their partnership and grow closer in their journey together. [12:05]

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!" (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, ESV)

Reflection: What is one challenge your spouse is currently facing, and how can you support them in this battle today?


Day 4: Self-Reflection and Personal Growth
Before addressing your spouse's issues, it is important to deal with your own. Like David, who defeated the lion and the bear before facing Goliath, ensure you have faced your personal challenges before helping your spouse with theirs. This self-reflection and personal growth are essential for a healthy and supportive marriage. [15:11]

"Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test!" (2 Corinthians 13:5, ESV)

Reflection: What personal challenge do you need to address in your life, and how can overcoming it help you better support your spouse?


Day 5: Affirming Your Spouse While Attacking the Issue
In marriage, it is crucial to affirm your spouse while addressing the real enemy. Different battles require different strategies, and God can use various means to bring deliverance. By focusing on the presence of the Holy Spirit rather than the tools used, couples can effectively tackle issues without harming their relationship. [26:47]

"Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person." (Colossians 4:6, ESV)

Reflection: How can you affirm your spouse today while addressing a specific issue in your marriage? What strategy can you use to ensure the focus remains on the problem, not the person?

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Quotes


The first principle of spiritual warfare in marriage is your husband or your wife is not the snake. The snake can... The snake can operate through them and can operate behind the scenes, but the real enemy is that snake, not your husband and not your wife. Attack the right enemy. [00:06:32]

We need to plant good seeds. That speaks about planting time, giving time, giving flowers, giving things to one another, giving attention, doing things that are nice. [00:01:09]

And just as David came alongside his brothers to fight Goliath, God wants us to come alongside our spouse to face their Goliaths. Remember what covenant means is it's an agreement where everything is shared. That means your battles are my battles. It's not anymore, well, that's your problem. You got yourself in this situation. You sort it out. [00:12:48]

So I'm going to go through three principles today of how to deal with these Goliaths in our life. Number one, remember your lions before you attempt to help someone else with their giants. You know, it's interesting when you read the scripture three times, David says emphatically, I've defeated the lion and the bear. [00:14:31]

Attack the issue, but we affirm the person. Destroy the enemy without destroying the person. You know, some people are so crazy. They're so religious and spiritual. They throw a whole heap of rocks and then they say, Holy Spirit, just cause the rocks to fall in the right place and hit the right people. Really? [00:27:10]

You cannot put God in a box. And I want to shatter this religious mindset is that there's only one way to defeat the enemy. What if my husband hasn't confessed and repented and he hasn't gone to E2? God only delivers on E2. And all of those things, you've got to confess the root sin. You've got to pull every leg off every spider demon. [00:28:36]

And today, in Jesus' name, we stand against every generational curse of divorce, and we break it. I break its power going right down the generations. It doesn't matter who's been divorced in your family. I declare it ends here. In Jesus' name, I break its power over your children and your children's children, and I declare freedom in these marriages. [00:35:28]

Sometimes the snake shows up in the form of rejection. You know, sometimes you have a wife and it doesn't matter how much love you give her, what you give her, it's not that she's a bottomless pit that you're pouring into, but it's just like she's always feeling alone. Sometimes there's hurts that run so deep that it gives room for a spirit of rejection to come. [00:04:32]

The Bible says, put on the garment of praise for the spirits of heaviness. Depression is a spirit. Now the Bible says one can put a thousand to flight, a thousand demons to fly to can put 10,000. If this is a spirit, we need to come into agreement with our spouse and together put that spirit of depression to flight. Amen? We need to defeat the spirit, defeat the snake, not the person. [00:05:28]

You know, David's brothers were angry. They said, we know that you are wicked and you can't see. You just came over here to look at the battle. I can just imagine what might have gone through David's mind. He might have thought, what? What battle's going on here? This guy's been shouting for 40 days. You guys are a bunch of cowards. No one's even moving. What battle have I come to see? [00:23:58]

And you see, what it does when you pick up a mirror before you pick up a stone is that, you start to not condone that person's behavior, but your words become graced with grace. You're able to come around them with compassion and understanding and kindness. And then your help actually helps them and not hurts them. [00:22:25]

Sometimes our faith is more in the stone and in the slingshots and the armor than in the presence of the Holy Spirit. [00:31:34]

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