Speaking Truth with Love in a Digital Age

First, the very minimal expectation of our speech on social media should be that it is true, that is, factually true, biblically sound, and the more evident that truth, the better. In other words, if people can see why it's true. Now, I say that's minimal, and the reason I stress that it is only minimal is that you can handle truth in ways that are sinful. Speaking truth doesn't guarantee that you are speaking righteously or lovingly. [00:01:36]

Paul said in Ephesians 5:29, let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for upbuilding, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. So besides being true, Paul says we should test what we say by whether it is aiming at building the other person up. And building up in Paul's vocabulary means helping them grow in their faith and in their understanding of Christ and in their love for other people and their holiness. [00:03:02]

The test is, am I aiming in my social media post, am I aiming to help the person that I'm talking to or talking about know God better, trust God more, love people better, walk in less sin, and more holiness? Now, that leaves lots of room for criticism. I'm not saying you can't ever say anything critical about what somebody has said or done, but the test of Ephesians 5:29 is, are we aiming manifestly at the other person's Godward good? [00:03:45]

It takes real wisdom to know how to use truth in the most effective way from situation to situation. And you can hear this in Proverbs 26, where it says in verse 7, like a lame man's legs which hang useless is a proverb in the mouth of fools. That's a true proverb. It just hangs there like useless legs in the mouth of a fool because he doesn't know the situation, he doesn't know how to use it. [00:04:46]

Social media calls for a peculiar kind of wisdom and restraint. What's peculiar about this occasion called the internet is that it is contextless. We don't have any control over who or how or where or when a person reads what we have written. There are thousands of different settings and emotional conditions and levels of maturity and states of spiritual height or depth and immediate experiences and on and on. [00:05:41]

In other words, we are unleashing our sentences into an unknown welter of occasions. I'm not saying that this should shut us down entirely, but I am saying wisdom, speaking as fits the occasion, should give us a certain restraint so that we are not indifferent to all the unknown effects what we may say may have. [00:06:23]

We should ask ourselves, really, why do you want so many people to hear what you say to your friend? I think there's some deep stuff going on there that's not real healthy. I've tasted it in myself, and I see it in others. Here's my fourth observation or fourth suggestion, is that we measure what we say on social media by whether it communicates a heartfelt desire. [00:07:26]

When we criticize somebody for a viewpoint or an attitude, do they discern that behind that criticism we really would like the day to come when we could be friends? Or do they taste a kind of contempt that communicates not only do I not like your opinion, but I wouldn't want to be around you even if you changed your opinion? [00:08:13]

Walk in a manner worthy of your calling with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace. In other words, no matter how seriously we feel we must take issue with somebody or some issue, do we give evidence that we really would like there to be peace? [00:08:42]

Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Of course, I'm not saying there is no occasion for righteous anger. I'm just saying that given the way we are sinfully made, wired by the fall, and very prone to defend ourselves and very easily provoked and frustrated and angered, the words of James are really needed. [00:09:29]

Can people detect that your heart is deeply content in and satisfied by the beauty and worth and greatness of Jesus? That's why we exist, to display Jesus Christ as the supreme treasure of the world. Do they taste that? Do they taste when they read or listen to what we say, I can tell they are very peacefully content and satisfied in Jesus? [00:10:37]

Go to him with all humility and a deep awareness of your own sinfulness, as Galatians 6:1 says, and express to him your concern again and ask him, perhaps, to read these points or listen to them or listen to you share them. And then don't pressure him, don't call for some big immediate change, but you and I and others will pray together that perhaps his communications might conform in the future more closely to God's word. [00:11:13]