Serving Others: The Heart of Christ-like Relationships

 

Summary

In our journey through the "Because of Jesus" relationship series, we delve into the profound truth that relationships are indeed larger than ourselves. They are not merely about what we can extract for our benefit but about how we can contribute to the well-being of others. This principle is not just a nice thought; it is the bedrock of the Kingdom of God. It is about saying, "I appreciate what you do for me, but what can I do for you?" This is the essence of Christ-like love, where the greatest among us is the servant of all.

We explored the life of King Saul, a man who, despite his impressive stature, was drowning in insecurity. Insecurity, as we understand it, is not just a lack of confidence; it is a strong self-reliance while simultaneously rejecting God's ability to work through us. It is a form of pride that, when left unchecked, becomes a weapon we use to destroy others. Saul's insecurity, which he failed to surrender to the Lord, eventually turned into jealousy, a destructive force that threatened to ruin his relationships with those who genuinely loved him.

We also looked at the life of David, who, unlike Saul, chose to embrace the Kingdom way. David's response to Saul's jealousy was not to retaliate but to honor the king, even when Saul sought to kill him. David's ability to celebrate Saul, despite Saul's animosity towards him, is a testament to the power of thankfulness and the spirit of Christ within us.

In our relationships, we must be vigilant against the seeds of jealousy and comparison. These seeds, if allowed to take root, can grow into a narrative that we believe to be true, even when it is not. They can distort our perception of reality and lead us to destroy the very blessings God has given us. Instead, we must choose to be thankful in all circumstances, recognizing that thankfulness and jealousy cannot coexist.

As we move forward, let us embrace the truth that our relationships are not just about us. They are opportunities to demonstrate the love of Christ, to serve, and to build one another up. Let us reject the lies of the enemy and choose to live in the fullness of God's peace and thankfulness.

Key Takeaways:

- Relationships in the Kingdom of God are about mutual edification, not self-centered gain. We are called to ask not only what others can do for us but what we can do for them. This is the heart of servant leadership modeled by Jesus and the foundation for healthy, God-honoring relationships. [41:21]

- Insecurity is a subtle form of pride that can lead to jealousy and the destruction of relationships. It is essential to surrender our insecurities to God, acknowledging that our true strength comes from Him. When we do this, we prevent our insecurities from becoming weapons against those who care for us. [53:50]

- Thankfulness is a powerful antidote to jealousy. By choosing to be thankful in all circumstances, we align ourselves with God's will and prevent the seeds of jealousy from taking root in our hearts. A thankful heart celebrates the blessings of others and finds contentment in God's provision. [01:16:03]

- The stories we tell ourselves about others' intentions can be dangerous fabrications that lead to unnecessary conflict. We must be careful not to assume we know what others are thinking and instead focus on the truth of God's word and His perspective on our relationships. [01:00:03]

- The example of David's response to Saul's jealousy teaches us the power of honoring others, even when they wrong us. By refusing to retaliate and choosing to show respect, we demonstrate the character of Christ and maintain the integrity of our witness. [01:27:59]

Study Guide

### Bible Study Discussion Guide

#### Bible Reading
1. 1 Samuel 18:5-9 (NIV)
> Whatever mission Saul sent him on, David was so successful that Saul gave him a high rank in the army. This pleased all the troops, and Saul’s officers as well. When the men were returning home after David had killed the Philistine, the women came out from all the towns of Israel to meet King Saul with singing and dancing, with joyful songs and with timbrels and lyres. As they danced, they sang: “Saul has slain his thousands, and David his tens of thousands.” Saul was very angry; this refrain displeased him greatly. “They have credited David with tens of thousands,” he thought, “but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom?” And from that time on Saul kept a close eye on David.

2. James 3:16 (NIV)
> For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.

3. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NIV)
> Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

#### Observation Questions
1. What was the reaction of the women of Israel to David's victory over the Philistine, and how did Saul respond to their song? ([55:45])
2. According to James 3:16, what are the consequences of envy and selfish ambition?
3. What does 1 Thessalonians 5:18 instruct believers to do in all circumstances?

#### Interpretation Questions
1. How did Saul's insecurity and jealousy manifest in his actions towards David? ([55:45])
2. Why does James describe envy and selfish ambition as leading to disorder and every evil practice? How does this relate to Saul's behavior?
3. How can giving thanks in all circumstances, as instructed in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, serve as an antidote to jealousy and envy? ([01:16:03])
4. What does David's response to Saul's jealousy teach us about handling animosity and conflict in our relationships? ([01:27:59])

#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on a time when you felt insecure or jealous in a relationship. How did it affect your actions and thoughts towards the other person? What could you have done differently to align with the principles discussed in the sermon? ([53:12])
2. In what ways can you practice thankfulness in your daily life to combat feelings of jealousy or envy? Identify specific situations where you can apply this practice. ([01:16:03])
3. Think of a relationship where you might be harboring negative assumptions about the other person's intentions. How can you shift your perspective to focus on the truth of God's word and His perspective on your relationships? ([01:00:03])
4. How can you demonstrate Christ-like love and servant leadership in your relationships this week? Identify one specific action you can take to serve someone else. ([41:21])
5. Have you ever found yourself creating a narrative about someone else's intentions that led to conflict? How can you prevent this from happening in the future? ([59:32])
6. David chose to honor Saul despite Saul's attempts to harm him. Is there someone in your life you need to honor or forgive, even if they have wronged you? What steps can you take to show them respect and maintain the integrity of your witness? ([01:27:59])
7. How can you be vigilant against the seeds of jealousy and comparison in your relationships? What practical steps can you take to celebrate others' blessings and find contentment in God's provision for you? ([01:16:03])

Devotional

Day 1: Serving Beyond Self
Mutual edification is the cornerstone of relationships within the Kingdom of God. It is not about seeking personal gain but about asking how one can contribute to the growth and well-being of others. This approach to relationships mirrors the heart of servant leadership that Jesus exemplified. It is about shifting the focus from a self-centered perspective to one that seeks to uplift and support those around us. In doing so, we embody the love of Christ, which calls us to serve rather than be served, and to give rather than take. This mindset fosters a community where individuals thrive together, each person playing a part in the collective nurturing of faith and love. [41:21]

"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." - Philippians 2:3-4 ESV

Reflection: How can you serve someone in your community this week without expecting anything in return?

Day 2: Surrendering Insecurity to God
Insecurity, when not surrendered to God, can evolve into a destructive force within relationships. It is a form of pride that relies heavily on self while dismissing the power of God to work through our weaknesses. This self-reliance can lead to jealousy and strife, damaging the bonds we share with those who care for us. Recognizing our insecurities and laying them before God is crucial. It is in acknowledging our dependence on Him that we find true strength and prevent our insecurities from becoming weapons that harm our relationships. By surrendering to God, we open ourselves to His work in us, transforming our weaknesses into testimonies of His grace. [53:50]

"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." - 2 Corinthians 12:9 ESV

Reflection: What insecurity can you surrender to God today, and how can you allow His strength to be displayed in that area of weakness?

Day 3: Cultivating a Thankful Heart
Thankfulness is a potent antidote to jealousy and comparison. By choosing to be thankful in all circumstances, we align our hearts with God's will and prevent the seeds of jealousy from taking root. A thankful heart rejoices in the blessings of others and finds contentment in what God has provided. It is a heart that celebrates rather than envies, building up rather than tearing down. Thankfulness changes our narrative, allowing us to see the goodness of God in every situation and to live in the fullness of His peace. [01:16:03]

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful." - Colossians 3:15 ESV

Reflection: Identify one situation where you've felt jealous recently. How can you transform that feeling into thankfulness today?

Day 4: Embracing Truth Over Assumptions
The narratives we create about others' intentions can be harmful and often stem from our own insecurities and misconceptions. It is vital to avoid jumping to conclusions about others' thoughts and actions. Instead, we should seek the truth in God's word and strive to understand His perspective on our relationships. By doing so, we can prevent unnecessary conflicts and maintain the integrity of our relationships. Embracing truth over assumptions allows us to live in harmony with one another, as God intended. [01:00:03]

"Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another." - Galatians 5:26 ESV

Reflection: What assumption have you made about someone else's intentions that you need to let go of in favor of seeking truth and understanding?

Day 5: Honoring Others Amidst Conflict
The story of David and Saul teaches us the power of honoring others, even in the face of conflict. David's refusal to retaliate against Saul's jealousy and his choice to show respect are powerful examples of Christ-like character. By choosing to honor rather than seek revenge, we maintain our integrity and demonstrate the love of Christ. This approach to conflict can lead to healing and restoration, and it sets a standard for how to treat others, regardless of their actions towards us. [01:27:59]

"Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all." - Romans 12:17 ESV

Reflection: Is there someone who has wronged you whom you can choose to honor today, and what practical step can you take to show them respect?

Quotes

- "Insecurity really is a strong self-reliance on me while I have a rejection of God who is able to do more than me through me." [53:12](Download | Download)

- "Jealousy is not the family I was raised in... jealousy is embracing the leading of Satan while rejecting the peace and the promise and the provision of God." [01:08:36](Download | Download)

- "Jealousy writes a story from thoughts that we call facts; however, in reality, oftentimes the events never even have to happen, but we thought they did or we thought they would so much till it became more real than anything that can be seen in this world." [01:00:03](Download | Download)

- "Thankfulness always destroys the work that the devil is sewing because when he brings, he always brings is a seed, and when we keep thankfulness on the forefront, it makes a seed never has a place to germinate." [01:19:36](Download | Download)

- "David wasn't just running to towns; he was running to C, he was living off of eating Cactus... and yet he chose let's close this out let me show you David's response in 1st Samuel 24... 'My Lord the king'... David bowed before him... 'why do you listen to all the people that say I am trying to harm you?'" [01:27:59](Download | Download)

- "Our relationships are bigger than us because of Jesus... we can reject evil that comes knocking on our door when it's dressed as jealousy and the invitation sounds so good." [01:24:31](Download | Download)

- "Saul died a bitterly jealous man pursuing to kill someone who loved him as though he were his own father." [01:25:50](Download | Download)

- "Jealousy and thankfulness do not coexist. Jealousy brings every kind of evil and thankfulness brings the will of God." [01:16:03](Download | Download)

- "The root cause of jealousy is connected to a person's inability to see what God has provided in their life and a lack of thankfulness." [01:11:14](Download | Download)

- "We don't work through demons, we rebuke them. Jealousy is demonic; it's embracing the leading of Satan while rejecting the peace and the promise and the provision of God." [01:09:21](Download | Download)

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Transcript
What was the most surprising thing in this sermon?
Were there any personal stories shared?