Relationship Traps | Rev. Dr. Bankole Akinbinu

Devotional

Day 1: The Impact of Our Relationships on Our Identity

Our thoughts, desires, and will are not formed in isolation but are profoundly shaped by the people we are in relationship with. These influences, both good and bad, leave deep imprints on our souls, affecting who we are and how we live. It is vital to recognize these marks and consider their source. God’s hands were the first upon us, forming us in His image, but many other hands have left influences that may not align with His purpose. The journey toward freedom begins with this awareness. [36:19]

Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”
1 Corinthians 15:33 (ESV)

Reflection: What is one belief or behavior you hold that you’ve always considered “just who you are,” but upon reflection, might actually be an imprint left by a past relationship or influence?

Day 2: The Danger of Walking in Ungodly Counsel

The wisdom of Scripture warns us against walking in the counsel of the ungodly, standing in the way of sinners, or sitting with scoffers. These relationships are not neutral; they actively shape our spiritual trajectory and can cause a regression in our faith. The progression from walking to standing to sitting illustrates a gradual spiritual decline. Our worship and joy in God are directly impacted by the company we keep. To experience God’s fullness, we must examine our alliances. [50:04]

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers.
Psalm 1:1 (ESV)

Reflection: Can you identify a relationship in your life where you have gradually moved from ‘walking’ to ‘sitting,’ and what is one practical step you can take this week to begin moving forward again in your faith?

Day 3: Breaking Free from the Clutter of Wrong Agreements

We can become so cluttered by the wrong messages and relationships that we fail to feel the movement of God’s Spirit around us. These relational traps and ungodly soul ties can keep us stuck, preventing us from living into the newness of life Christ offers. Freedom is found not just in knowing the truth, but in severing agreements with influences that contradict it. God calls us to clear away the clutter so we can fully experience His presence. [52:49]

How can two walk together unless they agree?
Amos 3:3 (ESV)

Reflection: Where have you made an agreement, perhaps even unknowingly, with a perspective or person that contradicts God’s truth about your identity or His purpose for you?

Day 4: The Transformative Power of Agreeing with God’s Word

The ultimate answer to unhealthy influences is to deliberately delight ourselves in the Lord and His Word. We must choose to live in agreement with what God says about us, over and above the reports of our experiences or the opinions of others. His Word provides a firm foundation that can overwrite the faulty imprints on our souls. This is how we break free from every wrong association and walk in the freedom Christ has won for us. [15:10]

…but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.
Psalm 1:2 (ESV)

Reflection: What is a specific promise from Scripture that directly contradicts a negative message you have believed about yourself, and how can you actively meditate on that truth today?

Day 5: Stepping into New Beginnings Through Obedience

God is calling us out of unhealthy attachments and into a fresh start. This new beginning starts with a decision to come into agreement with Him through surrender to Jesus Christ. It involves connecting with His body, the church, and living in obedience to His Word, regardless of what others may say or do. This is not a call to neutrality but to a passionate, forward-moving faith. Today is the day to step into the liberation and purpose He has for you. [31:52]

I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Galatians 2:20 (ESV)

Reflection: Is there an area of obedience—whether it’s surrendering your life to Christ, joining a church home, or leaving a specific unhealthy relationship—that God is inviting you to step into today?

Sermon Summary

The service opened in exuberant praise and gratitude for God's faithfulness, then celebrated a significant number of baptisms as visible evidence of inward transformation and fresh beginnings. Those baptized were presented as examples of death to the old self and union with Christ, an outward obedience that testifies to an inward newness of life. After worship, attention shifted to a new teaching series under the banner "Free Indeed," focusing on breaking unhealthy soul ties—relationship patterns that bind and distort spiritual growth. Drawing on Psalm 1 and 1 Corinthians 15:33, the preacher traced how companionship, counsel, and cultural conditioning carve lasting marks on the soul, explaining that Western individualism often obscures the deep social formation that shapes desires, thoughts, and habits.

Wisdom literature was used to show a moral trajectory: walking with the wrong people advances quickly from walking to standing to sitting, a poetic warning that neutrality often becomes regression. Practical examples—family imprinting, corrupt counselors, and the scientific image of a rotten apple spoiling the bunch—were offered to illustrate how association accelerates decay in character and faith. The remedy proposed is not mere isolation but intentional reorientation: delighting in the Word of God, aligning daily speech and companionship with Scripture, and refusing to live by contrary narratives. The call was pastoral and urgent—come into agreement with God through surrender to Christ, find a church home, and break ungodly attachments that hinder worship and fruitfulness. An altar invitation followed, emphasizing deliverance, restoration, and a concrete step toward community and obedience. The service closed with benediction and an assurance that God makes all things new for those who step into obedience and intentionally repent from damaging relational ties.

Key Takeaways

1. Baptism evidences union with Christ Baptism is not an empty ritual but a public enactment of dying to the former self and being raised into new identity. It marks both legal standing before God and a tangible shift in relational allegiance—one now anchored to Christ’s death and resurrection rather than old patterns. This ordinance should reorient daily choices and affiliations to reflect the new covenantal reality. [26:45]
2. Relationships imprint and shape souls Human formation is fundamentally social; early attachments, repeated words, and communal practices leave durable imprints on thought, desire, and will. Recognizing these imprints is the first step toward spiritual freedom, because many repeated “truths” about self and the world are acquired through others rather than discovered in Scripture. Liberation requires deliberate reeducation—choosing different companions, listening to different voices, and rehearsing the truths of God until they replace the old tapes. [97:05]
3. Bad company corrodes good character Companionship functions as curriculum: habitual association teaches habits, and corrupt counsel accelerates moral decay in ways often invisible until decline is advanced. The biblical warning is practical—proximity matters, and “neutrality” is often complicity because relationships shape trajectory more than occasional convictions. Wisdom invites a careful sifting of influences and the courage to sever agreements that erode spiritual integrity. [131:33]
4. Delight in the Word Choosing to delight in Scripture is an act of substituting God’s report for competing narratives that undermine faith, hope, and practice. Regular engagement with the Word reorients perception, resists corrupt sermons-in-circles, and produces the spiritual imagination needed to obey when relationships would pull one otherwise. This devotion is the soil in which new affections displace old imprints and genuine freedom takes root. [135:10]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[21:17] - Opening Praise and Greetings
[21:59] - God's Love and Purpose for Visitors
[25:18] - Baptism Sunday Begins
[26:45] - Baptism: United with Christ
[29:41] - Individual Baptisms and Testimonies
[36:16] - Death's Dominion Defeated
[87:35] - Series Introduction: Free Indeed
[88:08] - Relationship Traps: Psalm 1 & 1 Cor
[103:11] - Wisdom: Walking with the Righteous
[135:10] - Delight in the Word vs Bad Company
[151:52] - Invitation: Surrender and Church Connection
[162:21] - Benediction and Commissioning

Bible Study Guide

Bible reading
Psalm 1:1 (ESV)
Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers.

1 Corinthians 15:33 (ESV)
Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”

Romans 6:3–4 (ESV)
Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.

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Observation questions

What three actions does Psalm 1:1 warn against, and what do these actions represent in terms of relational proximity?
According to 1 Corinthians 15:33, what is the effect of bad company on a person’s character?
In Romans 6:3–4, what does baptism symbolize about our identity and how we are called to live?
The sermon described how relationships “imprint and shape souls” [01:37:05]. What examples were given of how early attachments and repeated words form us?

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Interpretation questions

Psalm 1:1 describes a progression from “walking” to “standing” to “sitting” with the wrong people. What might this progression reveal about how compromise happens gradually in relationships?
How does 1 Corinthians 15:33 challenge the idea that we can remain neutral or unaffected by the people we spend time with?
Romans 6:3–4 connects baptism with dying to an old way of life. How might this “death to the old self” relate to breaking unhealthy relational patterns?
The sermon emphasized that “wrong companions always expedite decay” [02:05:47]. Why do you think proximity to harmful influences accelerates moral and spiritual decline?

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Application questions

Baptism signifies dying to the old self and rising to new life in Christ. What old relational agreements or loyalties do you need to “die to” in order to walk in newness of life?
Relationships imprint our souls—sometimes with messages that contradict God’s truth [01:37:05]. What negative “imprints” or lies about yourself, God, or others do you still carry from past relationships? How can you actively replace those with God’s Word?
Delighting in Scripture is an act of replacing competing narratives with God’s report [02:15:10]. What practical step can you take this week to consistently delight in and align with God’s Word?
There is no such thing as neutral in the spirit—we are either moving forward or regressing [02:08:16]. Are there relationships in your life where you’ve been “neutral”? What would it look like to intentionally move toward godly influence in that area?
Bad company functions as a curriculum, teaching habits and shaping desires [02:11:33]. Who are the primary “teachers” in your life right now? How do their counsel and character compare to the wisdom of Scripture?
Some people are trapped by messages from people who aren’t even around anymore [02:02:01]. What voices from your past still affect your decisions or self-perception? How can you intentionally silence those voices and listen to God’s voice instead?
Coming into agreement with God means connecting with a local church [02:29:09]. Is there anything holding you back from fully committing to a community of believers? What would it look like to take a step toward deeper connection this week?

Sermon Clips

We don't give enough consideration to the primary influence that people have and are in our lives. And the problem with giving too little consideration to the impact that people have on us is that when it comes to analyzing and probing and thinking about who you are, why you do what you do, why you think what you think, why you act like you act, why you have the perspective that you have, why you believe what you believe. Too often times, our response is, this is just who I am. This is just who I am. When in fact, this is not who you are. It's who you have become through the influence of other people in your life. [01:35:01] (64 seconds) #InfluenceShapesYou

Because the way our souls are impacted, the reality is we can be trapped by people that aren't even around anymore. Because the mark that they left lingers beyond their physical presence. Some of us are trapped by people who were never around, And they should have been around, but the mark of their absence is imprinted on your soul, and as a result, you need to be delivered. [02:01:18] (38 seconds) #HealFromAbsentWounds

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Relationship Traps | Rev. Dr. Bankole Akinbinu | 2.8.2026 |10:00 AM