Reclaiming Identity: Truth, Worship, and Parental Guidance

 

Summary

In a world where confusion about gender and identity is not only tolerated but celebrated, it’s crucial to recognize the profound impact this has on our children, families, and the church. The constant questioning of a child’s gender identity—especially in formative years when their minds are still developing—plants seeds of doubt and confusion that can have lasting consequences. When schools and authorities repeatedly ask children to define their gender, or celebrate transitions, it shapes the environment in which our children grow, often undermining parental rights and introducing chaos into the family structure.

At the heart of this cultural upheaval is a deeper spiritual reality: every person is created to worship. When we turn away from worshiping God, we inevitably find something else to worship—often ourselves. The current cultural moment, with its focus on self-definition and self-fulfillment, is a manifestation of this misplaced worship. True healing and restoration come not just from rejecting false identities or renouncing spiritual influences, but from reclaiming surrendered ground and walking out our identity as image-bearers of God. This process involves spiritual warfare, healing from past wounds, and a commitment to truth.

Parents have a vital role in shepherding their children’s hearts, not just their behaviors. This means more than just removing harmful influences like smartphones and social media; it requires intentional investment in relationship, time spent together, and guiding children toward spiritual maturity. The influence of social media and digital culture is not neutral—it shapes minds, hearts, and even brain development. We must take seriously the responsibility to protect and nurture our children, leading them toward truth and away from the confusion and harm that the world offers.

The search for meaning is universal, and the pain of growing up is real. But the solution is not found in radical medical interventions or in affirming every feeling or desire. Instead, it is found in embracing the truth of who God made us to be, even when that means walking through discomfort or confusion. The church must resist the temptation to go along with cultural trends in the name of kindness, especially when doing so causes real harm. True love is rooted in truth, and our calling is to love people well by holding fast to God’s design and offering genuine compassion without compromising on what is right.

Key Takeaways

- The repeated questioning and celebration of alternative gender identities in schools and culture is not a neutral act; it actively shapes children’s understanding of themselves and can cause deep confusion and harm. The pliability of young minds means that what is normalized and celebrated becomes internalized, making it all the more important for parents and the church to provide clear, loving guidance rooted in truth. [01:30]

- Every human being is created to worship, and when we reject God as the object of our worship, we inevitably turn to something else—often the self. This misplaced worship is at the root of much of the current confusion around identity, and true restoration requires not just behavioral change but a spiritual reorientation toward God. [07:00]

- Spiritual warfare is a real and necessary part of reclaiming surrendered ground in our lives, especially in areas where we have believed lies or given in to cultural pressures. Healing involves not only renouncing false influences but also walking out new patterns of truth and addressing wounds from the past. [09:30]

- Parents must be proactive in shepherding their children’s hearts, not just managing their behaviors. This means removing harmful influences like smartphones and social media, but also investing time, building relationships, and guiding children toward spiritual maturity and resilience in the face of cultural confusion. [13:51]

- The church’s call to love must be anchored in truth, not in cultural accommodation. Going along with social transitions or using preferred pronouns in the name of kindness can actually do great harm, as it often leads children further down a path of confusion and irreversible medicalization. True compassion means holding fast to God’s design while offering genuine care and support. [27:41]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[00:30] - The Cultural Shift on Gender
[02:15] - The Impact of Repeated Questioning
[04:10] - Parental Rights and Authority
[06:00] - The Spiritual Root: Worship and Identity
[08:30] - Spiritual Warfare and Reclaiming Ground
[10:45] - Healing from Past Wounds
[12:30] - The Role of Technology and Social Media
[14:30] - Shepherding Children’s Hearts
[16:00] - The Search for Meaning in Adolescence
[18:20] - The Dangers of Medicalization
[20:45] - Vetting Christian Counselors
[22:20] - Expanding Definitions and Parental Influence
[25:00] - The Church’s Response: Truth and Love
[27:41] - Final Exhortation to the Church

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide

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### Bible Reading

- Genesis 1:26-27
*Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.*

- Romans 1:21-25
*(For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things. Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.)*

- Ephesians 6:10-13
*Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.*

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### Observation Questions

1. According to Genesis 1:26-27, how did God create humanity, and what does this say about gender?
2. In Romans 1:21-25, what happens when people stop worshiping God and start worshiping something else?
3. The sermon mentions that children are repeatedly asked about their gender identity in schools. What are some of the ways this repeated questioning can impact children, according to the sermon? [01:30]
4. What does Ephesians 6:12 say about the nature of the battles we face in life?

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### Interpretation Questions

1. The sermon says, “We were made to be worshipers. We were made to worship God... And when we don’t do that... we are going to worship something else. We’re going to worship ourselves.” How does this idea help explain the confusion around identity in our culture? [07:00]
2. Why is it not enough to simply remove harmful influences (like smartphones or social media) from children’s lives? What else do parents need to do, according to the sermon? [13:51]
3. The sermon talks about “reclaiming surrendered ground” and spiritual warfare. What might this look like in someone’s life who has believed cultural lies about identity? [09:30]
4. The sermon warns that the church can do harm by “going along” with social transitions in the name of kindness. Why might this be harmful, and what does it mean to love according to truth? [27:41]

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### Application Questions

1. The sermon challenges parents to shepherd their children’s hearts, not just their behaviors. What is one specific way you could invest more intentionally in your relationship with your child (or a young person in your life) this week? [13:51]
2. Are there any areas where you have allowed culture or social media to shape your understanding of identity or truth? What would it look like to “reclaim surrendered ground” in that area? [09:30]
3. The sermon says that true healing comes from embracing our identity as image-bearers of God. Is there a part of your identity or past that you need to bring to God for healing? What step could you take toward that this week?
4. If you are a parent, what boundaries or changes might you need to make regarding technology or social media in your home? How can you do this in a way that builds trust and relationship, not just rules? [13:51]
5. The sermon warns against affirming every feeling or desire, especially in children. How can you lovingly guide someone toward truth when they are confused or hurting, without simply “going along” with what they want? [27:41]
6. The search for meaning is universal, and growing up is hard. How can you support a young person in your life who is struggling with questions of identity or belonging?
7. The sermon says, “True love is rooted in truth.” Is there a situation in your life where you are tempted to compromise truth in the name of kindness? What would it look like to love well without compromising what is right? [27:41]

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Devotional

Day 1: We Are Created to Worship God, Not Ourselves
Every person is made to worship, and when we turn away from worshiping God, we inevitably find something else to fill that void—often ourselves or the values of the surrounding culture. This misdirected worship leads to confusion, chaos, and a loss of true identity, as we seek meaning and fulfillment in places that cannot satisfy. The call is to return to our Creator, to know Him, glorify Him, and find our purpose in making Him known, rather than exalting the self or the shifting ideologies of the world. [07:40]

Romans 1:25 (ESV)
"Because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen."

Reflection: In what ways are you tempted to seek meaning or identity apart from God, and how can you intentionally redirect your worship toward Him today?


Day 2: Parents Are Called to Shepherd Their Children’s Hearts
Parents have a vital responsibility to shepherd the hearts of their children, not just by restricting harmful influences but by actively winning their hearts toward spiritual matters. This involves spending intentional time together, guiding them away from destructive habits like excessive social media use, and nurturing their spiritual and emotional development through loving presence and engagement. The goal is not only to protect but to cultivate a deep, lasting relationship that points children to God. [13:51]

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 (ESV)
"And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise."

Reflection: What is one practical way you can invest in your child’s heart and spiritual growth this week, beyond simply setting boundaries?


Day 3: True Healing Involves Spiritual Warfare and Reclaiming Surrendered Ground
Healing from deep wounds and patterns of sin is a multifaceted journey that includes addressing spiritual warfare, renouncing past agreements with the enemy, and walking out new patterns of freedom. It is not enough to simply reject harmful influences; one must also seek healing from past wounds and intentionally pursue wholeness in Christ, reclaiming areas of life that have been surrendered to darkness. [10:30]

Ephesians 6:12 (ESV)
"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places."

Reflection: Is there an area of your life where you sense ongoing spiritual struggle or bondage? What step can you take today to reclaim that ground for Christ?


Day 4: The Search for Meaning Is Found in God’s Design
People are searching for meaning and identity, often in places that promise fulfillment but ultimately leave them empty or even harmed. The journey through confusion, especially in formative years, is made more difficult by cultural messages that celebrate self-determined identity over God’s design. True meaning and wholeness are found in embracing who God created us to be, rather than seeking answers in fleeting cultural trends or medical interventions. [22:20]

Psalm 139:13-14 (ESV)
"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well."

Reflection: Where are you tempted to look for meaning or identity outside of God’s design, and how can you affirm His purpose for your life today?


Day 5: The Church Must Love According to Truth
The church is called to love with both grace and truth, refusing to participate in practices that may harm children or compromise biblical convictions, even under the guise of kindness or acceptance. True love does not affirm confusion or celebrate transitions that lead away from God’s intent, but instead offers compassionate care that is anchored in the truth of God’s Word and the well-being of each person. [27:41]

Ephesians 4:15 (ESV)
"Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ."

Reflection: How can you show genuine love to someone struggling with identity issues while remaining faithful to biblical truth in your words and actions?

Quotes

Just asking the question, when in fact it's a duh, they're a boy or they're a girl, that just asking the question and then asking it repeatedly, you are actually, that's not inconsequential. That is, that does great harm to a child when you're asking the question, it plants in their mind, in a, in, I mean, they are very much wet cement in their, in their earliest years to be sure, right up through brain development at, you know, up to the age of 26 or so, they are very pliable and that's of course known. [00:10:09]
When you interject these things and you're celebrating Johnny coming out as Susie and he comes out of the bathroom dressed in girls clothes and all the kids are cheering and celebrating, that has an impact on the children that are watching that. So there's, there are so many ways, so many tentacles to this and so many ways in which kids are confused, parents' rights are stripped away, teachers are lying to parents about, and withholding information from their, from the child's mom about how they're identifying and what pronouns they're using. They're using a different name for the child. The parents don't even know about that. [00:10:42]
There are so many ways, so many tentacles to this and so many ways in which kids are confused, parents' rights are stripped away, teachers are lying to parents about, and withholding information from their, from the child's mom about how they're identifying and what pronouns they're using. They're using a different name for the child. The parents don't even know about that. [00:10:55]
At the end of the day, the idea, we were made to be worshipers. We were made to worship God. We were made to fit within a context of knowing him, making him known, glorifying him. And when we don't do that, when we refuse to do that, there's a way in which we are going to find an outlet someplace else. We are going to worship something else. We're going to find another altar. We're going to worship ourselves. You know, the God of self today is huge. [00:11:31]
We were made to fit within a context of knowing him, making him known, glorifying him. And when we don't do that, when we refuse to do that, there's a way in which we are going to find an outlet someplace else. We are going to worship something else. We're going to find another altar. We're going to worship ourselves. [00:11:37]
There were definitely some spiritual warfare matters that I needed to address. And I was being led and kind of coached in a very gentle and wonderful way through a process of reclaiming surrendered ground that I had given over to the enemy in this area of my life. And whenever he yanked the chain, I mean, I jumped and I reacted and I sinned and I went in that area. Well, part of what I needed to do there was break that authority. But then it wasn't just enough to renounce those familiar spirits or demonic spirits. Then I needed to walk those things out. And I also needed to heal from the wounds from years before that were done against me. So it's a multifaceted approach, but the spiritual warfare piece is certainly a part of it. [00:12:10]
If your kids are little, get the smartphone out of their hands. If your kids are older and they've had a smartphone for quite a while, you need to monitor that. You need to shepherd them in reducing the time that they're spending on this garbage and get them off of social media. It's a good month. Yeah. Off of most social media, the kids are not going to die without a smartphone in their hand. And although if they've been spending 10 hours a day on it, they're going to feel that way. [00:13:56]
It isn't enough just to pull stuff away from kids and to didactically teach them. We need to start, especially as dads, especially as spiritual fathers. Moms do this more easily, but they need to do it too. [00:14:23]
We need to shepherd the hearts of our children. We need to win the hearts of our children as fathers toward spiritual matters. We need to spend time with them, get them outdoors, do things as a family, get off the phones, because these social media apps are ruining the lives of our children by how they're influencing them. But also just the process of being on this crap for hours and hours and hours at a time is altering the brain development and the social development of our kids. We have got to start taking this stuff seriously. [00:14:36]
We need to shepherd the hearts of our children. We need to win the hearts of our children as fathers toward spiritual matters. [00:14:36]
We need to start taking this stuff seriously. There's lots of other things to say, but those are -a couple of things we we're pretty passionate parents either right. [00:15:05]
I think it's Frankel that talked to that wrote the book man's search for meaning you know whether it's man's search for meaning women's search for meaning ultimately I think that's what people are looking for. [00:20:31]
What is really unconscionable and frustrating in my opinion it is unbelievably gross medical and mental health malpractice to try to get kids at younger and younger ages to when you know that the data shows that if they're left alone that the vast majority of them will align with their biology if they're not pushed down this road or or um coddled down this road of transformation or the attempt at transformation. [00:21:26]
It's always been hard to grow up, it's always been difficult, it's always been a challenge, puberty has always been difficult but when you as a kid are going through that and you're hearing everybody say if you're uncomfortable in your body you're probably actually the other gender you really need to explore that well of course kids are gonna are gonna be like wait a minute maybe that's the solution that feels like a a really concrete answer and it's so celebrated why would I not do that. [00:21:55]
A quick caveat to what Melissa said a moment a little bit ago when she was talking about finding a Christian counselor to to walk with you in this journey absolutely of course I agree with that but we would both say make sure you're vetting the Christian counselor because there are plenty of Christian counselors who are not counseling Christianly right they go by the moniker Christian but they're not so make sure that you're vetting and you're you know what you're getting uh for your child or yourself to be counseled by. [00:23:02]
The whole concept of transgenderism our perspective has really uh blossomed blown up from from a gender dysphoria or a gender identity disorder to something that has become much much more expansive again even into trans species and all kinds of things. [00:25:31]
In addition to children wrestling with these issues there and and moms and dads not knowing what what do we do and they're listening to mental health professionals who are saying things like do you want a dead daughter or a live son do you you know and and literally there they feel oh my godgosh, what am I going to do if I don't listen to this expert? My child may kill themselves all because I didn't affirm this new ideology or whatever. [00:25:50]
A lot of people are now understanding that there are some parents that are, we believe, that are actually putting their child out in the public eye and calling them transgender, not because that's what that child desires, or they're cajoling and convincing them that it is, but because the parent is craving the public approval of what they're putting their child through. And I mean, honestly, that actually, and they're getting all the celebration, but it's actually at the detriment of their child. [00:26:53]
The church has to be very careful about not going along, because they're trying to be gracious and kind and loving, and we should want to do that. But you have to be careful. Most children that are being socially transitioned...and everyone around them participating in that social transition many of those kids the majority of those kids will go on to take cross -sex hormones or puberty blockers or both and many of them will go on to uh surgery which permanently medicalizes them and and puts them in a horrific situation the church that is trying to accommodate and be gracious and loving is actually doing great harm by going along even with the social uh transition per se of of this child. [00:27:28]
There's ways we can love and be gentle and gracious and inviting without actually using so -called preferred pronouns and those kinds of things i think we have to be really careful as a church to love according to truth. [00:28:10]

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