Raising Arrows, Not Boomerangs: Parenting by God's Design

Jun 21, 2026

Devotional

Day 1: Arrows, Not Boomerangs: Releasing What God Entrusted

Children are not possessions to control but arrows to steward. Like a warrior preparing arrows, parents shape character, sharpen purpose, and aim children toward God’s calling. The goal isn’t to keep them close but to release them into the world as God’s instruments. This requires resisting the urge to cling and instead nurturing their unique design. True stewardship means trusting God’s ownership over their lives. [35:42]

“Sons are indeed a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the sons born in one’s youth. Happy is the man who has filled his quiver with them.”
(Psalm 127:3-5, ESV)

Reflection: Where have you subtly treated your child as a “project” to manage rather than a soul to steward? How might releasing control deepen their trust in God’s purpose?

Day 2: Love God Loudly: When Worship Becomes Legacy

A parent’s authentic love for God is the foundation of faithful parenting. Children absorb what they observe: singing, serving, sacrificing. Hypocrisy sensors detect empty rituals, but wholehearted devotion leaves lasting imprints. Like Bob Tebow’s final word—“Jesus”—a life centered on Christ makes faith irresistible. The transfer of faith begins not with lectures, but with lived worship. [52:24]

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children.”
(Deuteronomy 6:5-7, ESV)

Reflection: What daily habits make your love for God visible? Would your child describe your faith as transactional or transformational?

Day 3: Pickup Truck Discipleship: Formation in the Mundane

Faith isn’t forged in grand moments but in ordinary ones: car rides, bedtime, meals. Like Steph Curry’s dad asking, “What does that mean to you?”, parents seize everyday conversations to connect truth to life. These unscripted interactions shape how children navigate disappointment, success, and relationships. Spiritual formation happens when biblical truth meets sidewalk reality. [58:24]

“Talk about [God’s commands] when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”
(Deuteronomy 6:7, ESV)

Reflection: When did a casual moment recently become a chance to model faith? How could you turn tomorrow’s routine into intentional discipleship?

Day 4: Sharpening the Bent: Honoring Unique Design

Each arrow has a specific bend—a child’s God-given personality, gifts, and calling. Sharpening involves studying their design, not forcing a mold. Like a warrior preparing diverse arrows for different battles, parents discern rather than dictate. This requires releasing cultural benchmarks (grades, trophies) to focus on eternal impact. Faithfulness trumps formulaic outcomes. [01:02:13]

“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.”
(Proverbs 22:6, ESV)

Reflection: Have you prioritized uniformity over uniqueness in your parenting? How can you better “sharpen” your child’s specific God-given bent this week?

Day 5: The Bow’s Release: Letting Go, Holding Hope

Releasing arrows requires surrendering outcomes to God. Like a archer’s open hand, parents trust the One who guides the arrow’s flight. This isn’t abandonment but active faith—believing God writes better stories than our fears imagine. The quiver empties so the world gains light-bearers. True success is seeing them hit God’s target, not ours. [01:04:28]

“Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain.”
(Psalm 127:1, ESV)

Reflection: What fear makes releasing your child difficult? How might entrusting them to God deepen your dependence on Him?

Sermon Summary

Psalm 127 sets the tone by insisting that the Lord is the actual builder of a home. Family work runs on empty if God is not in the center. Solomon calls sons a heritage and a reward, so the child stands first as gift, not as property. Stewardship, not ownership, becomes the frame. Faithful labor matters more than managed outcomes, because a child carries a will and a sin nature that no technique can finally control. The arrow image carries the load. Parents do not craft boomerangs that circle back. They shape, sharpen, aim, and then release arrows into God’s purposes.

Deuteronomy 6 clarifies how that shaping happens. The Shema plants the non-negotiable: Yahweh is God, and he is one. If Yahweh is the one and only God, then love for him must be whole. Heart, soul, strength. Moses presses the order. God’s words have to live first on the parent’s heart before they land on a child’s. No one can transfer what he does not possess. So the call lands on worship before technique. Let love for God be seen and heard. Let children watch a life that sings, prays, gives, repents, and serves. Authentic devotion beats scripted lectures, because kids carry sharp hypocrisy sensors. They can tell if prayer is real or ceremonial, if church is central or casual, if repentance is deep or just I am sorry.

The Shema then turns love into a rhythm. Talk of God along the everyday pathways of life. When sitting at home, on the road, at bedtime, at daybreak. The command to repeat is a word for engraving. Repetition makes impression. Information is not tossed out. Scripture stories, commands, and memory verses belong. But formation connects the what to the how. Pickup truck conversations and sideline moments, victories and losses, messy friendships and complicated coaches, all become on-ramps where truth is fitted to life.

The arrow image returns to finish the work. Every child carries a unique bent, so one-size formulas do not hold. Parents honor the bent, shape character, sharpen conviction, and then take aim. The target is not a resume or a scholarship. The target is the will of God. And then comes the hardest obedience. Release. The hand that fed, held, taught, and corrected finally opens, trusting the God who gave the child first and loves that child more still.

Key Takeaways

1. Children are God’s stewardship, not possessions. Parents receive sons and daughters as a heritage to be managed under God, not a project to validate personal dreams. Ownership breeds control and fear, but stewardship calls for faithfulness even when results do not match plans. The Lord builds, so parents plant and water without trying to be the architect. Outcomes belong to God, obedience belongs to parents. [38:34]
2. Parents must love God first. Deuteronomy’s order matters. God’s words must rest on a parent’s heart before they are repeated to a child. Authority flows from authenticity. A life that actually loves God teaches louder than any rule, because no one can pass along a fire he does not tend. [51:22]
3. Formation happens in everyday moments. The Shema puts discipleship in the traffic of normal life. Bedtime, breakfast, car rides, and sidelines become the workshop where truth is engraved. Information fills the mind, but formation bends the life, connecting Scripture’s what to today’s how. [58:24]
4. Aim at God’s will, then release. The arrow image sets the target and the finish. Parents sharpen, shape, and aim at the will of God, not status or applause. Real love then opens the hand, entrusting the child to the One who gave the gift and goes with them beyond the front door. [64:06]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[30:10] - Father’s Day and campuses
[31:26] - Boomerangs vs arrows
[32:51] - Culture’s parenting confusion
[34:34] - The big question about faithfulness
[36:19] - Hear O Israel, the Shema
[37:30] - Unless the Lord builds
[38:34] - Children belong to God
[41:24] - Stewards, faithful not outcomes
[44:31] - Project vs son cautionary tale
[49:44] - Love God with all
[52:24] - Worship before technique
[55:23] - Kids’ hypocrisy sensors
[57:29] - Formation in everyday moments
[64:06] - Aim at God’s will and release

Bible Study Guide

Bible Reading
- Deuteronomy 6:4-9 (ESV): “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”
- Psalm 127:3-5 (ESV): “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.”

Observation Questions

What does Psalm 127:3-5 compare children to, and what does this metaphor imply about their purpose?
According to Deuteronomy 6:4-9, what must parents prioritize before teaching their children God’s commands?
The sermon mentions that children have “hypocrisy sensors” ([55:23]). What specific examples were given to illustrate this?
How does Deuteronomy 6:7-9 describe the rhythm of teaching children about God?

Interpretation Questions

Why does Deuteronomy 6:4-5 emphasize loving God with all one’s heart, soul, and strength before instructing parents to teach their children? What happens if this order is reversed?
The sermon warns against viewing children as “projects” ([44:31]). How does this contrast with the biblical view of children as “arrows” or “heritage” in Psalm 127?
What does it mean for parents to “aim” their children at “God’s will” rather than worldly success ([01:04:06])? How does this shape a parent’s priorities?
How does the metaphor of “boomerangs vs. arrows” challenge cultural ideas about parenting ([31:26])?

Application Questions

Reflect on your own life: In what practical ways do your children (or those you influence) see you loving God “with all your heart, soul, and strength” daily? What might need to change to make this more evident?
Think about a recent “everyday moment” (car ride, mealtime, bedtime). How could you intentionally connect that moment to a truth about God’s character or promises ([58:24])?
The sermon warns against treating children as “projects” to validate personal dreams ([40:31]). What fears or desires do you need to surrender to trust God’s stewardship over their lives?
How can you create space in your family’s routine to “sharpen” your child’s understanding of their unique purpose in God’s plan ([01:03:16])?
What practical step could you take this week to “release” an area of control over your child’s life, entrusting it to God ([01:04:28])?
Identify one area where your actions might contradict your words (e.g., prayer, repentance, generosity). How can you model authenticity in that area for your children?

Sermon Clips

41s

#RaiseForHeaven

“The goal of parenting is that we faithfully aim them in the right direction, that we shape them and we sharpen them. That means the question isn't, will they make me proud? The question will they is this, will they hear well done good and faithful servants someday? The question is not, will they get into the right school? The question is, will they get into heaven? The question is not will they be the valedictorian? The question is are they learning to walk in wisdom?”

43s

#KidsBelongToGod

“Children belong to God before they belong to us. In Psalm one twenty seven, the writer, Solomon says that sons are a heritage of the Lord and that is literally what Solomon wrote. There are some modern translations that put that children including boys and girls, I would agree with that, but literally it says sons. That's why my translation does it that way. But he says that our children are a heritage. They are a gift from the Lord. They are not they do not belong to us.”

45s

#ParentingIsStewardship

“The question is not when they do mess up will their behavior reflect poorly on me? What will the neighbors think? That is not the question. The question have they sinned against a holy God and have I led them toward repentance? You see, someday, all of us parents are going to answer for the stewardship of the hearts and minds and the souls of our sons and daughters. And we need to view our parenting through the lens of understanding that our children belong to God before they belong to us.”

57s

#MakeFaithAttractive

“Do I make following Jesus attractive? Does this seem like a really good way to live? Is it authentic? Is it real? And is it worth it? Is it worth it to be shunned by friends for a teenager, say, because you live for Jesus. A parent's life ought to demonstrate that it is. Is it worth it to sacrifice and not hoard everything to yourself but to to to give freely? To give to the work of the Lord? Is it worth it? See, I think parents, we have we have the key to that in the life of our child.”

50s

#WorshipfulParenting

“You know, you I'd read a good Christian book on parenting and and I'd I'd preach the principles in that book and we wanted to preach principles, and principles are good and we'll get to some next week. But the primary principle of parenting isn't some kind of formula. It's worship. It's to love God. The greatest gift you will ever give your children is to see them, for them to see you rather, worshiping Let them see you singing. Let them see you reading your Bible. Let them see you writing that check and putting it in the offering plate.”

40s

#SharpenArrowsNotBoomerangs

“In other words, how are gonna live with that? How are we gonna how are we gonna live with the fact that you think your coach is mistreating you? What are you gonna do with that? What would Jesus have you do with that? There was just a constant a constant emphasis on more than having the information but having your soul shaped. And parents, that's our responsibility to take these arrows, not boomerangs. We don't want them to come back from where they started. We wanna take these arrows, and it's our job to sharpen them.”

46s

#StewardshipNotPossession

“They belong primarily to him. And he tells us that all of our effort is in vain unless it is the Lord who builds our house, the Lord who builds our family. What Solomon is trying to convey to us is something that we desperately need to understand. My daughter does not primarily belong to me, she belongs to God. She has been entrusted to me as a stewardship. entrusts children to parents. He gives children to parents not as a possession but as a stewardship.”

72s

#AuthenticFaithMatters

“There is something about children and teenagers, they have hypocrisy sensors. They know. They know if prayer is real or ceremonial. if devotion to God through the church is central or optional. They know if repentance is genuinely turning and changing or if it's just saying the words I'm sorry and not mean it. They know that. And so I have to ask myself a question, is the way that I'm living demonstrating to Bob McCartney's daughter that what I say is what I'm trying, not perfection, but what I'm trying to live?”

43s

#ChildrenNotProjects

“He said, looking back, I was not my father's son. I was my father's project. Is that not one of the most sad statements you've ever heard in your life? That a son looks back on his childhood, on his upbringing, on the on the parenting, and he says, I was my parents' project, not their son. Parents, we are called to raise our children in the ways and in the word of the Lord. The goal of parenting is not outcomes.”

46s

#ParentingRevealsSoul

“is primarily that we love God before we lead our children toward God. And so there's this great question that I think we all ought to ask, and that is, does my life make following Jesus more attractive, more authentic, and more worth it for my children? Because here's the truth. Parenting is spiritually exposing. Right? I mean, you're just kind of laid bare there. It reveals our idols. It reveals our anger. It reveals our fears. And here's what we know. It reveals our hypocrisy.”

54s

#LoveGodWholeheartedly

“Here's what Moses says. Here's the command. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. With all your heart, with all your desires, with all your affections, with with all your decisions, Let your love for God overflow from the heart, from the central decision making point of your life with all your soul. That is with your whole life. The soul for in Jewish thought encompasses all that you are, everything about your life. So with all your soul, put your soul into something.”

58s

#EngraveTruthDaily

“That word repeat is an interesting word in the language of the Old Testament, the Hebrew. It means to make an impression, to engrave on something. And so you repeat them often enough that they become engraved on your child's heart. And he tells us how to do this, when to do it. He says, I want you to do it in the everyday pathways of life. When you lie down, when you get up, talk about them when you sit in your house, when you walk along the road. He says, I want you as parents to impress these things upon your child in the everyday pathways of life.”

48s

#ReleaseTheArrow

“that child is totally dependent on the parents for their provision, for their protection. They are totally dependent upon parents for everything in their life, but as that child begins to grow they begin to take on more and more personal responsibility in their life. But eventually, there comes this place where that as a parent, I must transfer all of that responsibility that I had for the child, and I need to transfer that to a heavenly father who loves them. There is a point where I have to to draw the the bow back and release the arrow that God has entrusted to me.”

55s

#FormationOverInformation

“But information is the is the what the bible says. Formation is how it shapes our lives. And here's what I would say to parents, what I would say to grandparents. It is important that your child is in LifeGroup. It is important that your child is a part of what goes on here on Wednesday nights because what we will do is we will support you and help you by teaching that information, but formation is for you. There have been many, many pickup truck conversations that were not formal devotional times,”

53s

#EverydaySpiritualConversations

“It is when we look at our lives and the instruction of our children happens on the way to school, on the way to practice, at bedtime, at meals together, in great disappointments, in great victories and successes, when friendships get complicated, when relationships get messy, the conversations that we have as parents begin not just the information to follow Jesus but the spiritual formation to sharpen their focus and how that works in life.”

53s

#ParentAsSteward

“have a responsibility with the gift that God has given us. These young impressionable moldable lives are granted to us for us to steward, for us to be responsible And so that brings me to a way of approaching parenting that that really needs to be ironed out. You see, if my child belongs to me, then my plans for my child are what are important. My dreams for my child are what are important. My reputation is on the line when they mess up. My control and my fears are the ones that guide my decision making.”

37s

#RaiseArrowsNotBoomerangs

“But the truth is that when it comes to boomerangs, that's not what we want to do as parents. When we talk about raising children, when we talk about our families, it's not that we want to send them out in order for them to come back. We are to raise arrows. That's what the Bible says and you're gonna see in this passage of scripture. So today we're going to talk about raising arrows and not boomerangs. It's interesting that that word is used in our modern culture. There are people who are called boomerang kids.”

41s

#BibleAnswersParenting

“which many people say just borders on neglect. They just you just let your kid go. They don't they don't discipline their child at all and and the lack of discipline in the life of the free range child leads to absolute rebellion and anarchy. Neither of those two would be right biblically, so we wanna ask ourself a question. If our culture doesn't have the answers when it comes to parenting, does the Bible have anything to say to us? And it really does. The Bible has something to say to us about God's blueprint for the family.”

43s

#BoomerangLessons

“The Australian aboriginal people created a hunting tool. It has been largely used for the last few years, for the last couple of decades in America as a toy. It is the boomerang, and the boomerang is designed in such a way that if someone who is skillful in throwing it throws it, it will actually come back to you. But that's not exactly how the aboriginal tribe in in Australia designed it. As one aboriginal said when he was describing it to a television reporter, it only comes back if I miss.”

46s

#OverControlledParenting

“He was raised to be a quarterback from the time that he was an infant, a baby. His dad, Marv, had been a fairly successful college football player and he believed he had a system to turn his child into an NFL quarterback. And everything about Todd's life, from the time he was small, was controlled by Marv. He dictated his diet. Todd Marinovich never had a piece of birthday cake at his party or anybody else's. He was not permitted to eat processed sugar, never had a bowl of ice cream, never had a candy bar. His diet was strictly controlled.”

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Raising Arrows, Not Boomerangs: Parenting by God's Design

Devotional

Day 1: Arrows, Not Boomerangs: Releasing What God Entrusted

Day 2: Love God Loudly: When Worship Becomes Legacy

Day 3: Pickup Truck Discipleship: Formation in the Mundane

Day 4: Sharpening the Bent: Honoring Unique Design

Day 5: The Bow’s Release: Letting Go, Holding Hope

Sermon Summary

Key Takeaways

Youtube Chapters

Bible Study Guide

Sermon Clips

Raising Arrows, Not Boomerangs: Parenting by God's Design

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