Navigating Shock: The Power of Presence and Support

"Because the world is broken and we talked about that last week catastrophes happen to everybody they happen to you they happen to the people sitting next to you they happened to me they happen to to everybody the Bible says this uh there on your outline Ecclesiastes chapter 9:12 people can never predict when hard times might come like a fish in a net or birds in a snare people are often caught by sudden tragedy we we're just caught out of the blue uh by sudden tragedy things just happen and you don't plan them you don't know they're coming they just come." [00:00:00]

"Now the first reaction to any Rogue wi is going to be shock let me show you some examples the Bible has a lot to say about people in shock let me show you some on the screen here's a verse of from Jeremiah Jeremiah says a horrible and shocking thing has happened and here's one from Ezekiel he says I sat for seven days shocked at what happened to me in other words he said I I couldn't even move I was paralyzed here's one from Isaiah Isaiah says I'm in terrible pain I'm shocked and I hurt so much that I can't hear or see my head spins early evening he says that that was my favorite time you like to watch TV early evening my favorite time has become a nightmare he says I'm in shock my head is spinning I'm numb." [00:40:40]

"Now right now every one of us here are in one of three conditions you either a know somebody who is in a crisis right now like what we just talked about or B you're in one yourself right now or see you don't realize it but you're getting ready to go into one because they happen all the time in life and you are maybe headed into a crisis that you're not prepared for a financial crisis you you get laid off a a Health crisis you get the dreaded call from the doctor the test came back positive or uh or a relational crisis somebody walks out of your life these kind of things just happen a loved one dies and you either know somebody in that situation you're in it right now or you're probably going to be going into it in the near future." [00:01:50]

"The Bible commands us if we're followers of Jesus Christ commands us to help people in pain to help those who are in shock to help people who are going through a difficult time Galatians 62 says this by helping each other with your troubles you truly obey the law of Christ now what is the law of Christ love your neighbor as yourself I've been receiving letters all week one of them just came in yesterday it was handwritten and it said dear Rick and Kay uh your testimony this weekend touched my heart he watched online you rejected cynicism and accepted Grace and had the courage and objectivity to share your journey thank you for your example and for turning your sorrow into someone else El's hope thank you for turning your sorrow into someone else I want our church to be famous for people who turn our sorrow into somebody else's Hope." [00:03:11]

"Show up that's just the first thing you do you just show up you don't stand on the sidelines you don't wait for an invitation now I know when you see somebody in pain they've lost their job they just discovered they've got breast cancer uh a loved one died somebody just asked for a divorce a lot of times I don't know what to say okay let me tell you something you don't have to say anything in fact it would be better if you just show up and shut up you don't need to say anything so stop worrying saying I don't know what to say to my friend who's in shock who's in pain in grief you don't need to say anything you shut up but you show up that's the ministry of presence and by the way don't wait for an invitation you just show up." [00:04:47]

"The greater the grief the fewer words needed the greater the grief the fewer words needed you're going to need to use this when people are in pain around you the greater the grief the fewer words needed now if it you know somebody gets a splinter you can talk to them for half an hour okay and you know if they had a bad hair day you can talk to them on the phone for 30 minutes and comfort them on that if they lose a loved one you just need to be quiet you just need to be there it is the it is the ministry of presence life often doesn't make sense and loss is inevitable when the unexpected comes your way you may find your world is instantly turned upside down and you long to understand why." [00:08:30]

"You take the initiative when you have a friend who's in shock you take the initiative the Bible says in Proverbs 3:27 whenever you possibly can do good to those who need it now do good means anything it could be run an errand offer to babysit bring a meal uh you know mo awn do good means any practical thing you can do whenever you possibly can do those who need it now let me tell you what not to do don't say to somebody who's just gone through a major loss they just got fired they just got a bad report from the doctor's office don't say call me if you need anything that's about the dumbest thing you can say it's sumbody in shock because now you've put it on them they've got to work to get your help call me if you're not taking the initiative you're forcing them to take the initiative don't say call me if you need and by the way don't even say how can I help because when somebody's in shock they haven't the slightest idea how you can help when somebody is in shock they are numb they are paralyzed they pick up a newspaper and they look at it but they can't even read it." [00:11:11]

"When you're in this first stage you need to do two things number one you need to cry out to God cry out to God this is the bare minimum two things to do because this is probably all you can do when you're in shock cry out to God Psalm 50:15 says this call to me in your day of trouble and I will rescue you and you will honor me do you see what that says that you actually honor God when you call out for his help why because you are depending on God it honors God when you depend on God Lamentations chap 2:19 says this get up cry out in the night some of you need to do this right now cry out cry all through the night pour out your heart like water in prayer to the Lord lift up your hands in prayer to him cry out to God God I'm hurting God I'm sad God I'm sick God you just pour out every emotion you got to God that's what God wants you to do you pray you want to listen to some some praise music or something but but open up your heart to God that's the first thing you do the second thing you do is you let others help you I let other people help me and when you're going through shock you need to be easy on yourself don't be rough and by the way never try to make a major decision when you're in shock because it'll almost always be wrong so postpone any major decision." [00:14:22]

"Be easy on yourself take it take it easy and accept assistance from others let other people help you you know I love the fact that my neighbors my neighbors took my trash cans out I didn't ask him to do that but they take him out and put him back I had neighbors who went and washed my car last week my my neighbor Yasser who's a Muslim insisted on driving me to the first service he said I no I'm not goingon to let anybody else Rick I'm your neighbor love your neighbor as yourself and and so he drove me to the first service my neighbor did he said I I I want you driving I'll I'll drive you that's what a friend does Proverbs 17:17 says this a friend loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity what's that saying the Bible is saying that relationships are best when you're in pain a brother is born for adversity friends are made for Fairweather friends show up you know it's interesting when you're in shock who shows up and who doesn't and what you need to do on that is not judge the people who don't show up because they may be in their own kind of pain but just realize that real friends every real friends walk in when everybody else walks out a brother is born for adversity a friend loves at all time now I'm saying you got to let other people help you when you're in this first stage and the reason why I'm saying this is because your natural reaction when you're in deep pain is to withdraw your natural reaction you get laid off you don't want to talk to anybody you just find out you got breast cancer you don't want to talk to anybody you just had a miscarriage you don't want anybody to know about it you just had some major thing happen in your life it is the human reaction to withdraw into isolation and that is the exact opposite of what you need in shock you need Fellowship." [00:16:39]

"Now I just want to say this if you're going through a crisis right now please let us know please don't hold it in please don't keep it to yourself this church is here to help you we are here to help we have all kinds of groups support we we have all kinds of pastors who can talk we have counselors we have all kinds of things to help you out but we can't help if you hold it in if you keep it a secret if if you're trying to walk through your pain by yourself when there's people willing to help that's not that smart this church is here here for you in fact we want to pray for you in fact I want to pray for you right now and I'm going to ask K to come out and lead us in prayer and if you're going through any kind of pain Financial physical relational spiritual you are going through a tough time right now would you give us the privilege of praying for you what I'm going to ask you to do just a minute you don't have to say anything just silently stand and by your standing saying I'm letting everybody know I need prayer and I'm going to ask Kate to come and pray so okay would you come right now and there she is I snuck up on you you snuck up on me all right would you stand if you need prayer I know some of you are going to say I need prayer so desperately but there's absolutely no way in the world I'm standing up please stand we're not very good in church at comforting each other when you've had a loss and it's been a while people expect you to be over it and past it and some of you you could say well I can't stand because my loss was so long ago but for some of you that wound is so fresh it's as if it was today and some of you are still glued to your seats because you're embarrassed you don't want anybody to know you don't want anybody to see your tears you're afraid if you stand you will break into sobs and I just want to tell you it's okay let's pray together." [00:19:38]

"God these brothers and sisters who are standing before you have lost something or someone so dear so precious and they are bewildered and bowed down with with grief and sadness and shock they didn't see it coming it's out of the blue and yet here has catastrophe landed in their lives and God this is a holy moment because their grief and their shock matters to you and it matters to us and we don't want to push it aside and we want don't want to tell anybody standing to just get over it to move on to look at the future forget what the past just keep moving God we don't do that you don't ask us to do that so may we not do that to each other and I pray for these brothers and sisters who were able to stand and say before you and before this congregation I am wounded by this pain and the suffering and the shock and I don't know what to do so God I pray that as their neighbors we would stand here even in this community and touch hold hands touch the back of somebody touch their elbow to let them know that they are not alone in their pain and their suffering that it's not only you that sees it but the people in the room here feel it and are touched as well by their anguish God your word so clearly says that many of us plant in tears God we have cried we have watered sick beds and crave sights and broken relationships with buckets and buckets and buckets of Tears we have planted in tears but your word also tells us that we will eventually be able to harvest with shouts of Joy so as we stand here really vulnerable and authentic before you and before each other we say that we have planted in tears now God would you do what only you can do would you eventually help us to reap to harvest with shouts of joy for some God that feels like saying we're going to climb Mount Everest someday it just feels so far Out Of Reach and yet it's not Jesus you were a wounded healer you were the wounded healer and your wounds have provided healing for us God with tiny little Seeds of Hope we're willing to believe that someday we too those of us standing weeping were willing to believe that someday God we will become wounded healers as well I pray that bitterness will not sink deep I pray that anger will not consume I pray that doubt and fear and anxiety will not dominate but for these who are carrying shock and grief today God we come to you we come to you we bring all that is broken all that has been shattered all that has crushed us and we say God here is what I've planted in tears please help me reap help me Harvest with shouts of Joy thank you that you never push us away in our sadness and in our grief and our sorrow but you draw Us close in an Embrace and so we Embrace each other we grieve in community we experience loss in community and in that place may we find your comfort in Jesus our wounded healer's name I pray amen." [00:21:47]