Make Room in Your Hearts for Us by James Jennings

Devotional

Day 1: The Unchained Door: Making Room in Your Heart

A chain lock restricts a door to cautious cracks, but Christ’s people are called to wide-open hearts. Paul confronted believers who kept him at arm’s length, not because he withheld affection, but because their suspicions and lies narrowed their capacity to trust. A deep relationship begins when we unscrew the self-protective barriers that limit how much of others we let in. What chains have you installed to keep others from seeing your struggles? What would it look like to replace suspicion with intentional vulnerability? [05:08]

“We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open. You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections. In return (I speak as to children) widen your hearts also.”
(2 Corinthians 6:11-13, ESV)

Reflection: Where have you installed a “chain lock” in your heart toward others? What practical step could unscrew one barrier this week?

Day 2: Speaking Freely: Truth That Breaks Chains

Deep relationships thrive on conversations that bypass small talk to name fears, sins, and doubts. Paul didn’t just share facts—he wept, corrected, and risked hard truths. Yet many keep entire rooms of their heart locked, calculating which words are “safe” to say. Judas hid his greed behind silence; Peter learned to confess his failures. What raw, unspoken words linger in your soul? Who has earned the right to hear them by proving trustworthy? [12:02]

“Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.”
(Proverbs 17:9, ESV)

Reflection: What struggle have you reduced to “small talk” with others? Who in your life has shown they can handle your unfiltered honesty?

Day 3: The Currency of Trust: Building Relational Integrity

Trust isn’t earned by demanding access to others’ hearts but by living so truthfully that confidences stay sealed. Paul defended his ministry by pointing to his integrity: no manipulation, no hidden agendas. Gossip, broken promises, or judgmental reactions install chains on others’ doors. Do your conversations protect or exploit vulnerability? Does your life make it wise for others to widen their hearts? [14:41]

“We have wronged no one, we have corrupted no one, we have taken advantage of no one. I do not say this to condemn you, for I said before that you are in our hearts, to die and to live with you.”
(2 Corinthians 7:2-3, ESV)

Reflection: Would those who’ve shared hard truths with you describe you as a vault or a sieve? What gossip habit needs repentance today?

Day 4: When Rebuke Becomes a Gold Ring: Embracing Correction

Paul’s tears and bold corrections were proof he loved the Corinthians enough to wound them. Relational depth isn’t tested when we agree, but when we clash. Pride slams doors; humility receives rebuke as a “gold ring” of care. Yet many distance themselves from anyone who names their blind spots. Who have you sidelined because their truth felt too sharp? What if their courage was actually Christ’s kindness to you? [20:44]

“Like a gold ring or an ornament of gold is a wise reprover to a listening ear.”
(Proverbs 25:12, ESV)

Reflection: When someone last corrected you, did you install a chain or lean in? What old wound still restricts your heart from that person?

Day 5: Christ’s Affection: The Engine of an Enlarged Heart

Paul’s open heart flowed from being “spent and spent again” for others—a love mirroring Christ’s. Jesus knew betrayal yet washed Judas’ feet; He bore rejection to make rebels His friends. Our capacity to love grows not by focusing on relationships, but by letting Christ’s unstoppable affection crush our pride, fear, and old hurts. What if your closed doors aren’t about others’ failures, but about resisting His work in you? [44:44]

“For God is my witness, how I yearn for you all with the affection of Christ Jesus.”
(Philippians 1:8, ESV)

Reflection: How has Christ’s relentless love reshaped your view of rejection? What relationship needs His affection, not your effort, to widen your heart?

Sermon Summary

Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 6 and 7 give a biblical category for what makes relationships deep: room in the heart. Paul can say, “We have spoken freely to you” and “our heart is wide open,” even while the Corinthians have become restricted in their affections toward him. False teachers, suspicions, and accusations had put a chain lock on the Corinthians’ door. Paul’s heart was open, but their hearts had become guarded.

The chain lock image exposes a searching question: what is restricting the door on the inside? Deep relationships do not come merely through years together, common interests, or knowing intimate facts. Deep relationships require freedom of speech, where people can say what actually matters: “I was hurt,” “I need help,” “I was wrong,” or “I am struggling.” Yet truthfulness must be joined to trustworthiness. A person who wants to be deeply known must become more truthful, and a person who wants others to open up must become someone it is wise to open up to.

Paul’s free speech also included painful correction. His letter grieved the Corinthians, but his correction came out of affliction, anguish, and many tears. Loving rebuke often becomes a fork in the road. Pride hears correction and installs the chain lock, shrinking affection for years over a conversation that lasted twenty minutes. Love, however, asks whether the painful word is true. A reprover who loves enough to tell the truth should be treasured rather than pushed away.

Suspicion, gossip, bitterness, selfish busyness, and unrealistic expectations can all restrict the heart. Suspicion constructs a person in the mind and then responds to that imagined person rather than to who they actually are. Busyness can claim concern while refusing to give time, hospitality, hospital visits, inconvenient conversations, and tangible burden bearing. Unrealistic expectations can demand from another Christian what only Christ can give.

Paul’s affection goes beyond revealing himself. He makes room for the Corinthians, weeps over their souls, and gladly spends and is spent for them. Deep relationships are not mainly about telling secrets; they are about giving oneself. Still, mutual depth requires two widened hearts. One person can open the door, speak freely, and wait patiently, but cannot remove the chain from another person’s door.

Christ supplies the deepest source of this enlarged heart. Christ knows His people completely, bears weakness, tells the truth, forgives sin, welcomes His people, and gives Himself for them. The affection of Christ Jesus makes old offenses look small, weakens pride and self-protection, and frees Christians to say with Paul, “Our heart is wide open.”

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Key Takeaways

1. Make room in the heart Paul does not measure relational depth by information exchanged but by room made for another person. A heart can speak about itself while remaining centered on itself. Christlike affection gives time, attention, tears, and spiritual concern for another’s good. [31:10]
2. Truthfulness requires trustworthy character Freedom of speech cannot grow where confidences are spread, weaknesses are weaponized, or judgments come too quickly. Paul appeals to the integrity of his conduct because trust is not something another person owes regardless of behavior. Deep relationships grow when honesty and careful faithfulness meet. [14:27]
3. Receive correction without shrinking back Loving correction reveals whether a relationship can go deep. Pride turns a rebuke into a reason for distance, but humility asks whether the difficult word is true. A friend who sees sin and speaks with tears may be giving a gift that superficial companionship never gives. [20:44]
4. Do not let suspicion build chains Suspicion assigns motives before hearing explanations and begins relating to a person constructed in the mind. Gossip can separate close friends with shocking speed because it poisons affection at the root. Wisdom may require distance from real manipulation, but imagined motives should not be allowed to rule the heart. [25:40]
5. Christ enlarges a small heart The affection of Jesus Christ is greater than fear of rejection, pride, old wounds, and self-consciousness. Christ’s complete knowledge and self-giving love free His people to love others without demanding equal return. A deeper communion with Christ becomes the real source of deeper love for His body.

## [44:28]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[01:38] - What Makes Relationships Deep?
[04:21] - Paul’s Wide Open Heart
[08:23] - The Chain Lock on the Heart
[11:30] - Speaking Freely and Honestly
[14:12] - Truthfulness and Trustworthiness
[16:32] - Self-Protection and Learned Concealment
[20:00] - Difficult Truth in Deep Relationships
[25:23] - Suspicion, Gossip, and Bitterness
[28:36] - Time, Hospitality, and Embodied Love
[31:10] - Giving Yourself, Not Just Secrets
[34:50] - Two Widened Hearts
[38:42] - Love That Survives Disappointment
[40:18] - Room, Truth, Forgiveness, and Affection
[44:28] - The Affection of Christ Jesus

Bible Study Guide

Bible Reading

2 Corinthians 6:11-13
“We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open. You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections. In return (I speak as to children) widen your hearts also.” [04:21]

2 Corinthians 7:2-3
“Make room in your hearts for us. We have wronged no one, we have corrupted no one, we have taken advantage of no one. I do not say this to condemn you, for I said before that you are in our hearts, to die together and to live together.” [08:23]

2 Corinthians 2:4
“For I wrote to you out of much affliction and anguish of heart and with many tears, not to cause you pain but to let you know the abundant love that I have for you.” [20:44]

Proverbs 17:9
“Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.” [25:40]

Observation questions

In 2 Corinthians 6:11-13, what contrast does Paul make between his own heart and the Corinthians’ affections? What does he ask them to do?
What accusations does Paul answer in 2 Corinthians 7:2, and how does his statement in verse 3 show that he is not simply trying to defend himself? [06:12]
According to 2 Corinthians 2:4, what was going on in Paul’s heart when he wrote a painful letter to the Corinthians?
What are some of the “chain locks” that can restrict a heart toward another person—such as suspicion, gossip, bitterness, busyness, or unrealistic expectations? [28:31]

Interpretation questions

Paul says the Corinthians were “restricted in [their] own affections.” How can a person’s own fears, assumptions, or past hurts keep a relationship from growing, even when the other person is seeking peace? [11:04]
Paul connects his call for the Corinthians to make room for him with his own trustworthy conduct. Why is trustworthiness necessary before someone can wisely open up about personal struggles and weaknesses? [14:31]
Paul’s correction caused grief, yet it came from “anguish of heart” and “many tears.” What makes correction loving rather than harsh, self-righteous, or controlling? [21:16]
Proverbs 17:9 says that repeating a matter separates close friends. How does gossip change the way a person sees someone else, especially when motives are assumed before the person has been heard? [27:06]

Application questions

Is there a relationship in which your heart has become restricted? What may have put the chain on the door: an old hurt, a disappointment, suspicion, fear of rejection, or pride? [42:33]
Are there things you find difficult to say to trusted Christians—such as “I was hurt,” “I need help,” “I was wrong,” or “I am struggling”? What makes those words hard to say, and what would be one small step toward freer speech? [12:02]
Consider whether others would describe you as a safe and trustworthy person. Do you keep confidences, listen before judging, and refuse to use someone’s weakness against them? Where might the Lord be calling you to grow? [15:20]
Think of a time when someone gave you difficult but loving correction. Did it make you more guarded toward them, or did you ask whether the word was true? Is there a conversation that still needs humility, forgiveness, or follow-up? [21:47]
Is there someone whose motives you have been assigning in your mind without hearing their explanation? What could it look like to seek clarity rather than continuing to relate to a version of that person constructed by suspicion? [26:34]
Love eventually becomes visible through time, hospitality, attention, and bearing burdens. Who might you make room for this week through a call, a meal, a visit, an invitation, or an unhurried conversation? [29:11]
Christ knows His people completely, tells them the truth, forgives them, and gives Himself for them. How might growing in the affection of Christ make you less controlled by self-protection, old offenses, or the need for equal return from others? [44:48]

Sermon Clips

So maybe the real question in this whole time, and you can forget everything I've said up to this point, and you ask, "How can I get a deeper relationship?" Maybe what you need to hear is, "What would happen if my relationship with Christ was deepened? Would that not enlarge my heart? Maybe that's the whole focus. It's not on getting deeper relationships with people. It's knowing Christ more. That will free you of all the self and fleshly garbage that gets in the way of you loving others more. [00:45:02]

You cannot put that demand on someone. If my trustworthiness and behavior is not winning your trust, I shouldn't expect you to open up your heart. So, he does. Paul appeals to the integrity of his conduct. So there's this two-sided responsibility when it comes to having deep relationships. If I want to be deeply known, I have to become more truthful, right? And if I want other people to open their hearts to me, I have to become more trustworthy. [00:14:53]

But the Christian life is not natural. The Christian life is full of the power of the Holy Spirit that transforms you into a different person. And no matter how natural your temperament was and not talking growing up, God can crush all of that and change you. Doesn't mean the change in one person is going to be identical in another. But don't set the bar low in your life. Christian, do you not know that your old man was crucified with Christ? Do you not know that you've become obedient from the heart? [00:19:27]

So you can't demand deep relationships while reserving the right to become distant every time somebody tells you something difficult. Let me just say that again. You cannot demand I want deep relationships in my life and yet try to reserve the right that every time someone tells me something difficult I become distant. [00:23:00]

They don't really love me. They're using me. I mean, if you think thoughts like that, notice what's happened. You're no longer mere merely evaluating what the people are doing. You're evaluating in your mind why they're doing it. And you're assigning motives to them when they've had no opportunity to clearly express to you why they did what they did. And now you have evil evil suspicions in your heart towards them and that's going to wreck you, right? [00:27:02]

Um, you can know someone 20 years, as I said, and still be shallow. But love eventually has to become embodied where you're spending time together and you're having heartfelt conversations together and you're living life together. Uh to say I care about you eventually means I gave an evening to you. I noticed you weren't there. I called. I sat with you in the hospital. [00:28:58]

Paul, he had affliction, anguish, tears. A hard man can say hard things and feel nothing. But Paul could say hard things while his heart was breaking. That is truth with an open heart. [00:21:16]

So Paul's openness included correction. So to speak freely does not mean I tell you everything pleasant that I feel. That's not speaking freely. That's actually being deceitful and dishonest. Speaking freely also means I love you enough to tell you something you may not want to hear. [00:20:40]

Christ knew his people completely. He bore our weaknesses. He told us the truth. He forgave us. He carried our burdens. He welcomed us. He served us. He revealed himself to us. He gave himself for us. [00:44:48]

Bitterness, right? An offense gets replayed until the person becomes nothing more than what they did to you. Um, what else can restrict the heart? Busyiness. Selfish busyiness. You want deep relationships, but everything else already has first claim on your calendar. Right? Real love takes time. [00:28:33]

But if you think that way, you're never going to get close to anyone. Um, self-p protection that you have to keep yourself from being hurt, right? Isn't that why people have self-p protection? They want to keep themselves from getting hurt. They end up never getting close to anyone because they're too self-protective, right? You don't want to go down that path. So, there's other reasons we may struggle to speak freely. [00:16:32]

Um, now I would also add here, temperament is not sin. Some of us have natural temperaments that are different than other people in the church. Some naturally speak more easily than others. But personality cannot be a permanent excuse for refusing the kind of truthfulness that we should have. [00:18:46]

And once you believe someone has used you, manipulated you, or acted against you, your heart naturally begins to close. And if they really have manipulated you, you should have a heart close. You don't play into their manipulation the next five years of your life, right? They need to repent. And if they don't, distance has to happen because they're going to wreck you. [00:26:08]

There's freedom of speech. You don't merely talk a lot, right? The the question is, can we actually talk about what matters? Are you able to tell someone, I was hurt by what you just did to me. I need help. I'm struggling with assurance that I'm even saved. I think I was wrong. I'm struggling with thoughts that I've committed the unpardonable sin. [00:12:02]

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