Love Not Self-Seeking: Avoiding Disgrace in Community

Devotional

Day 1: God's Ability to Keep Us from Falling

We are reminded that God's power is not only for times of strength and deliverance, but also for His ability to preserve us. He is able to guard us from stumbling and to present us blameless before Him. This assurance is a source of comfort and encouragement as we navigate life's challenges, knowing we are held secure by His power. [38:18]

1 Peter 1:5
"who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time." (New American Standard Bible)

Reflection: In what specific area of your life do you feel most vulnerable to stumbling, and how can you actively lean into God's power to keep you in that area?

Day 2: God's Desire to Strengthen and Help Us

Beyond His sheer ability, God actively desires to strengthen us, especially when we feel weary or lack the will to continue. He is not only capable of providing deliverance from external pressures but also of igniting within us a desire to walk with Him. This desire to help and strengthen us reveals His deep care for our well-being and our journey of faith. [40:04]

Philippians 2:13
"for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure." (New American Standard Bible)

Reflection: When you feel a lack of desire to pursue spiritual growth or obedience, how can you remind yourself of God's active desire to empower and strengthen your will?

Day 3: Love as the Foundation for Spiritual Gifts

Spiritual gifts are meant to build up the body of Christ, but they can become divisive if not rooted in love. Love, by its very nature, is about giving oneself for the benefit of others. Therefore, a proper understanding and use of spiritual gifts requires a foundation of biblical love, ensuring our gifts are used to serve others rather than ourselves. [46:59]

1 Corinthians 13:4-5
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs." (New International Version)

Reflection: Consider a time when you used a spiritual gift or a personal talent. How did the presence or absence of love impact the way you used it and its effect on others?

Day 4: Acting Properly as Followers of Christ

As followers of Christ, we are called to live according to a standard of what is proper, guided by God's Word. Acting disgracefully means acting contrary to this standard, whether through inherently sinful actions or through behaviors that negatively affect others. Love compels us to live in a way that honors God and benefits our neighbor, avoiding actions that are shameful or improper. [54:32]

Romans 13:13
"Let us walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy." (New American Standard Bible)

Reflection: Identify one specific area where you might be tempted to act "disgracefully" or improperly. What biblical principle can guide you to act with love and honor in that situation instead?

Day 5: Self-Denial for the Benefit of Others

True biblical love is not self-seeking; it is other-centered. Every action that dishonors God or others often stems from self-interest. Therefore, embracing self-denial and focusing on what benefits our neighbor, rather than ourselves, is essential for living out Christ's love and avoiding actions that are improper or disgraceful. [01:33:59]

1 Corinthians 10:24
"No one should seek their own good, but the good of others." (New International Version)

Reflection: Think about a recent decision you made. How much of that decision was motivated by your own benefit versus the benefit of someone else or the community?

Sermon Summary

A congregation is urged to build a life and ministry on the clear standard of God’s Word so that spiritual gifts edify rather than divide. The text roots spiritual gifting in agape love: genuine Christian ministry must be other-centered, not a platform for self-promotion. Acting “disgracefully” is explained as behaving contrary to what is proper for followers of Christ—either by committing inherently sinful deeds (deeds of darkness) or by using legitimate freedoms in ways that cause others to stumble. The preacher exposes how ego and self-interest invariably produce shameful actions, and insists that love’s habit is obedience to the rule of Scripture, which serves as the measuring stick for Christian conduct.

Practical categories are drawn out: the black-and-white sins that belong to darkness, and the narrower, relational sins that become sinful by how they affect another person’s conscience or spiritual life. Sexual behavior, nightlife practices, drunkenness, jealousy, gossip, and intentional division are placed within the “disgraceful” frame when they dishonor God or exploit others. At the same time, legitimate freedoms in Christ are not a license to gratify appetite; they become sinful when exercised without regard for weaker consciences or the welfare of the church. The talk presses believers to choose community-minded decisions, to deny appetites when necessary, and to let Christ’s self-giving love reshape motivations.

The conclusion brings the congregation to communion and an invitation: Christ’s love provided the definitive example of giving oneself for others, and the call is to let that pattern govern personal life, relationships, and the stewardship of spiritual gifts. Listeners are challenged to examine intentions, repent where self-centeredness has produced disgrace, and pursue conformity to the image of Christ—so that gifts flow as grace that builds the body rather than fracturing it.

Key Takeaways

1. Love obeys God's revealed standard Love is not a subjective feeling but a formed posture that aligns with Scripture as the measuring stick for Christian life. Obedience to God’s Word shapes what is “proper” for followers of Christ and prevents personal preferences from becoming excuses for disgraceful behavior. The discipline of letting the Word guide action sanctifies motives and steadies community life. [55:10]
2. Ego produces disgraceful acts When self-interest dictates choices, even lawful practices turn harmful; ego-driven actions aim at personal advantage and yield shameful outcomes. Disgrace in the Christian life often traces back to a refusal to deny appetite or ambition for the sake of others. True holiness requires identifying where self seeks gain and deliberately choosing the neighbor’s good instead. [90:11]
3. Sexual intimacy belongs in marriage Sexual acts outside God’s design are described as dishonorable because they exploit persons and distort love into appetite satisfaction. The preacher contends that consensual or cultural definitions of “romance” cannot redefine what Scripture calls proper; true love protects another’s dignity and refuses to make them an object of use. This understanding calls for integrity in relationships and the courage to honor God’s ordering of sex. [69:19]
4. Freedom must protect weaker consciences Christian liberty is real but relational: exercising freedom without regard for another’s conscience can turn an allowed act into sin against Christ. Choosing not to press freedoms for the sake of a brother or sister is an active service of love, not legalism; it keeps the body from being “ruined” through careless liberty. The test of freedom is whether it builds up the community rather than wounding it. [82:01]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[38:08] - God's ability to strengthen and present us
[41:03] - Opening announcements and gratitude
[44:50] - Series introduction: "Gift It"
[46:06] - Love as the prerequisite for gifts
[48:46] - Ego produces disgrace: sermon title
[51:52] - What "disgracefully" means
[55:10] - Scripture as the measuring stick
[59:02] - Deeds of darkness listed
[61:00] - Nightlife, carousing, and drunkenness
[67:07] - Sexual morality and dishonor
[82:01] - Freedom, conscience, and stumbling blocks
[101:21] - Communion and gospel invitation
[112:27] - Baptism and closing benediction

Bible Study Guide

Here is a Bible study guide based on the sermon summary:

Bible Reading

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NASB)
Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not
arrogant, does not act disgracefully, does not seek its own benefit; is not
provoked, does not keep an account of a wrong; does not rejoice in unrighteousness,
but rejoices with the truth; always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always
perseveres.

Romans 14:13 (NASB)
Therefore let’s not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this: not to
put a stumbling block or a hindrance in a brother’s way.

Galatians 5:13 (NASB)
For you were called to freedom, brothers and sisters; only do not turn your
freedom into an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.

Observation questions

The sermon highlights that love "does not act disgracefully." What specific examples of "deeds of darkness" were mentioned as being inherently improper? [59:02]
The sermon distinguishes between "black and white" sins and sins that become sinful based on how they affect another person's conscience. What is an example given of a legitimate freedom that can become sinful in its exercise? [01:22:01]
The sermon states that "ego produces disgrace" and that "seeking our own benefit will lead to acting disgracefully." [48:46] How does the sermon explain the connection between self-interest and shameful actions?
The sermon mentions that "love does not seek its own benefit" and that "every disgraceful act that we commit is done in the name of self interest." [01:30:11] What biblical example is given to illustrate Christ's self-giving love that did not seek His own benefit? [01:31:35]

Interpretation questions

The sermon explains that acting "disgracefully" means behaving contrary to what is proper for followers of Christ, either through inherently sinful deeds or by using legitimate freedoms in ways that cause others to stumble. [01:19:19] How does this definition challenge a purely individualistic understanding of Christian behavior?
The sermon emphasizes that "love’s habit is obedience to the rule of Scripture, which serves as the measuring stick for Christian conduct." [54:32] How does Scripture function as a "measuring stick" for determining what is proper and what is disgraceful in the Christian life?
The sermon points out that "freedom must protect weaker consciences" and that exercising freedom without regard for another's conscience can turn an allowed act into sin against Christ. [01:22:01] How does this concept of "relational freedom" require a more mature and community-minded approach to personal choices?
The sermon states that "ego produces disgrace" and that "until we learn to let the agape love of God fill our hearts, we are prone to act disgracefully towards each other." [01:31:18] [01:37:52] In what ways does self-centeredness or ego manifest in actions that dishonor God or exploit others?

Application questions

The sermon challenges us to build our lives and ministries on the clear standard of God’s Word so that spiritual gifts edify rather than divide. [44:50] In what specific area of your life or ministry are you currently relying more on your own preferences or opinions than on the clear teaching of Scripture?
The sermon highlights that "ego produces disgraceful acts" and that "seeking our own benefit will lead to acting disgracefully." [48:46] When you consider your recent decisions, can you identify any instances where self-interest or personal appetite may have led you to act in a way that was improper or dishonoring to God or others?
The sermon explains that "sexual intimacy belongs in marriage" and that sexual acts outside of God's design are described as dishonorable because they exploit persons and distort love into appetite satisfaction. [01:07:07] How can you actively pursue integrity in your relationships and honor God's design for sexual intimacy, even when cultural norms may differ?
The sermon emphasizes that "freedom must protect weaker consciences" and that choosing not to press freedoms for the sake of a brother or sister is an active service of love. [01:22:01] Can you identify a personal freedom you currently exercise that might be causing a weaker brother or sister in Christ to stumble, and what steps can you take to prioritize their spiritual well-being over your own preference?
The sermon calls us to examine our intentions and repent where self-centeredness has produced disgrace, pursuing conformity to the image of Christ. [01:41:21] What is one specific, tangible step you can take this week to consciously deny a self-centered appetite or ambition for the sake of serving another person or building up the community of faith?
The sermon states that "love does not seek its own benefit" and that "until we learn to let the agape love of God fill our hearts, we are prone to act disgracefully towards each other." [01:30:11] [01:37:52] Reflect on a recent situation where you prioritized your own needs or desires over the needs of someone else. How can you intentionally reorient your motivations to reflect Christ's self-giving love in similar situations going forward?

Sermon Clips

benefit. We're only looking at the first part of that. Love does not act disgracefully. It does not seek its own benefit. And he's using these pairs again, and this time, the the latter is gonna explain the former. In other words, because whenever there is a a a self seeking nature about ourselves, then disgraceful acts will always follow. That's why the title of this message is ego produces disgrace. Ego produces disgrace. Seeking our own benefit will lead to acting disgracefully. [00:48:23] (37 seconds) #EgoBreedsDisgrace

But I know certain parts of this message have been have been eating at some of us. I know it's challenging. I get it. Right? Because when we think about love, we start to realize just how other focused love is, and it's hard because the flesh naturally is self focused. Right? And it's that self focus, by the way, that begins to cause us to walk disgracefully. But, also, let me remind you guys that without challenge, there is no growth. Right? Challenge is required for growth. [00:57:41] (23 seconds) #LoveIsOtherFocused

Nothing that takes place in those spaces are proper for children of light. Those are spaces that deeds of darkness take place. And so this is why learning to read the bible contextually starts to really just object to these weird sayings because we still wanna be in strip clubs and nightclubs every weekend, but still be Christians. Improper for that to become the places that we wanna dwell in. That's in the bible. Email me, and I'll give you more because I know I'm gonna get an email. [01:01:52] (35 seconds) #FaithOverNightlife

Christians that intentionally stir up mess are disgraceful. That's just that's what Paul says. I'm just using his words. Christians who intentionally stir up mess and messy and division and all of the weird stuff, you're disgraceful, and you're moving in a disgraceful way. Why? Because that is improper for a Christian. [01:05:15] (21 seconds) #RespectConscience

It ain't one or the other. When y'all agreed to lay together and not be married, y'all both demonstrated that y'all don't love each other. Not biblically. And I know somebody in their head, like, that's not true. That's not true. It's not true because your idea of love is a perversion. Yeah. And we've been so conditioned to really think that that that taking advantage and causing us to dishonor god is love when god is like, love does not act disgracefully. [01:12:04] (26 seconds) #SexOutsideMarriageIsNotLove

we as followers of Christ sitting around giving each other permission to dishonor god together. Right. Right. I don't care if you told me I can. No. That's right. I'm not. Because I'm not gonna give you permission to do what is wrong. Giving consent to each other to behave improperly with each other is taking advantage of each other to satisfy yourself. Jesus. And that is not biblical love because love does not look out for the interest of itself but what is best for others. [01:13:31] (30 seconds) #NoPermissionToSin

Right? He uses it in first Corinthians thirteen five. Right? But then he uses it in first Corinthians chapter seven verse 36. Now here's the thing. In first Corinthians chapter seven, Paul begins to give his his preference that he wishes people won't be married. Yeah. And he says this is not a command. This is just a preference. And the whole preference of this is that he says you will have a split devotion with the lord. And listen. Anybody that's married with kids, we are we he ain't lying. Anybody that actually wanna live on mission for the lord and got a wife and a family, we all know that we all trying to figure out the rhythm of how to do this thing and be there for our children and be there for our spouse and go to whatever job you gotta go to and be on kingdom advancement for the lord. It is it's hard. [01:15:14] (43 seconds) #ConsiderOthersFirst

the other day at the thingy thing, the boot camp thing that we had, we had snacks on the table. Right? The snacks that we had on the table had some peanuts in it. Now I forgot that Natasha got a peanut allergy. Right? And so the peanuts was on the table. I like a little peanut, a little m and m, a little salty, a little mix between sweet and salty. And Joy hey. Her. You know, Joy gonna come. And so Joy came, and she said, pasta. And I'm like, what? She like, Natasha, I got the peanut allergy, and it's peanuts in the room. And at first, I'm like, they had a bag on the table. Wait. She be alright. They ain't in the table. They ain't in the bag. And then she looked at me, and then it started to process in my head after I had to process it. You know? And I was like, oh, but we open them, and we eat them. And they're on the table, so people will probably and Natasha being Natasha, she's it's okay as long as they eat it over there. It's like, no. Yeah. We should probably just take them on up on okay. Ain't nothing wrong with eating peanuts. K? [01:23:43] (72 seconds) #ReadBibleContextually

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Love Not Self-Seeking: Avoiding Disgrace in Community

Devotional

Day 1: God's Ability to Keep Us from Falling

Day 2: God's Desire to Strengthen and Help Us

Day 3: Love as the Foundation for Spiritual Gifts

Day 4: Acting Properly as Followers of Christ

Day 5: Self-Denial for the Benefit of Others

Sermon Summary

Key Takeaways

Youtube Chapters

Bible Study Guide

Sermon Clips

Chatbot

Love Not Self-Seeking: Avoiding Disgrace in Community

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