Judgment, Wisdom, and Love in Relationships

 

Summary

In today's exploration of the Sermon on the Mount, we delve into the profound teachings of Jesus, focusing on the concept of judgment and the metaphor of pearls and pigs. Jesus instructs us not to judge others, emphasizing that none of us possess the full truth about anyone else. Judgment, in this context, refers to condemning or criticizing others, often as a means of control. Instead, Jesus calls us to relate to others in a way that reflects the kingdom of God, which is characterized by love and understanding.

The passage about not giving what is sacred to dogs or casting pearls before pigs is often misunderstood. It's not about deeming some people unworthy of our wisdom or love. Rather, it's about recognizing the futility of offering something that isn't helpful or desired. A pig cannot appreciate a pearl; it seeks food. Similarly, when we impose our "pearls of wisdom" on others without their desire or readiness, we fail to truly help them. This teaching challenges us to examine our motives and approach in offering advice or correction.

Jesus's message is about humility and respect for others' autonomy. We are reminded to be mindful of the "law of supply and demand" in our relationships, ensuring that the wisdom we offer is actually sought after. This requires us to be attentive to the needs and readiness of others, rather than assuming a posture of superiority. In doing so, we honor the individual kingdoms of those around us, aligning our actions with the principles of God's kingdom.

Key Takeaways:

- Judgment and Condemnation: Jesus warns against judging others, as we lack the complete truth about anyone. Judgment often stems from a desire to control, but in the kingdom of God, we are called to relate to others with love and understanding, recognizing our own fallibility. [01:46]

- Pearls and Pigs Metaphor: The metaphor of not casting pearls before pigs is about the futility of offering something that isn't helpful or desired. It's not about worthiness but about the appropriateness and timing of our advice or wisdom. [03:22]

- Respecting Others' Autonomy: We are encouraged to respect the autonomy of others, avoiding the imposition of our wisdom or advice when it is not sought. This requires humility and a recognition of others' individual journeys. [06:42]

- Law of Supply and Demand: In relationships, we should be mindful of the balance between the wisdom we offer and the demand for it. Offering unsolicited advice can hinder rather than help, and we should be attentive to others' readiness and needs. [07:19]

- Motivation by Love: When offering advice or correction, our motivation should be love, and it should be offered with discernment and humility. This aligns our actions with the principles of God's kingdom, fostering genuine relationships. [08:50]

Youtube Chapters:

- [00:00] - Welcome
- [00:44] - Context of the Sermon on the Mount
- [01:09] - Jesus's Intentional Teachings
- [01:36] - The Blessed Life and Inner Goodness
- [01:46] - The Call to Avoid Judgment
- [02:11] - Understanding the Pearls and Pigs Metaphor
- [03:22] - Helpfulness Over Worthiness
- [04:08] - The Problem with Pearl Pushing
- [05:03] - Avoiding Unwanted Advice
- [06:02] - Holy Objects and Respecting Others
- [06:42] - Honoring Individual Kingdoms
- [07:19] - The Law of Supply and Demand
- [08:23] - Being a Student of Others
- [09:08] - Motivation by Love
- [09:28] - Conclusion and Community Invitation

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide

Bible Reading:
- Matthew 7:1-6 (NIV): "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces."

Observation Questions:
1. What does Jesus mean when he says, "Do not judge, or you too will be judged"? How does this relate to the idea of controlling others? [01:46]
2. In the metaphor of pearls and pigs, what is the significance of the pearl and the pig? How does this relate to offering advice or wisdom? [03:22]
3. How does Jesus's teaching on judgment and the metaphor of pearls and pigs challenge our understanding of relationships? [06:42]
4. What does the phrase "law of supply and demand" mean in the context of offering wisdom or advice to others? [07:19]

Interpretation Questions:
1. How does the concept of judgment in Matthew 7:1-6 challenge the way we interact with others in our daily lives? [01:46]
2. What might be the consequences of offering unsolicited advice, according to the sermon? How does this relate to respecting others' autonomy? [05:03]
3. How can the metaphor of pearls and pigs be applied to our understanding of when and how to share wisdom with others? [04:08]
4. In what ways does the sermon suggest that our motivation for offering advice should be rooted in love and humility? [08:50]

Application Questions:
1. Reflect on a recent situation where you judged someone. How might you approach that situation differently in light of Jesus's teaching on judgment? [01:46]
2. Think of a time when you offered advice that wasn't well-received. How could you have better assessed the other person's readiness or need for your input? [03:22]
3. Identify a relationship where you tend to offer unsolicited advice. How can you practice the "law of supply and demand" in that relationship this week? [07:19]
4. Consider a person in your life who you often try to "fix" with your wisdom. How can you shift your approach to one of love and understanding, respecting their autonomy? [06:42]
5. How can you become more attentive to the body language and verbal cues of others to better understand when your advice is truly needed? [08:23]
6. Reflect on your motivations when offering advice. Are they rooted in love and humility, or in a desire to control? How can you align your actions more closely with the principles of God's kingdom? [08:50]
7. What specific steps can you take this week to honor the "individual kingdoms" of those around you, as suggested in the sermon? [06:42]

Devotional

Day 1: Embrace Love Over Judgment
In the teachings of Jesus, we are reminded of the importance of refraining from judgment. Judgment often arises from a desire to control or criticize others, but Jesus calls us to a higher standard. We are encouraged to relate to others with love and understanding, recognizing that we do not possess the full truth about anyone. This perspective invites us to acknowledge our own fallibility and to approach others with humility and grace. By doing so, we align ourselves with the principles of God's kingdom, which is characterized by love and compassion. [01:46]

"Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge." (James 4:11, ESV)

Reflection: Think of a recent situation where you judged someone. How can you replace that judgment with an act of love or understanding today?


Day 2: Discernment in Sharing Wisdom
The metaphor of not casting pearls before pigs teaches us about the importance of discernment in sharing wisdom. It is not about deeming others unworthy but about recognizing when our advice or wisdom is not helpful or desired. Just as a pig cannot appreciate a pearl, offering unsolicited advice can be futile. This teaching challenges us to examine our motives and approach, ensuring that our guidance is appropriate and timely. By doing so, we honor the readiness and needs of others, fostering genuine and respectful relationships. [03:22]

"Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning." (Proverbs 9:9, ESV)

Reflection: Consider a piece of advice you are eager to share. Is the person ready to receive it, or should you wait for a more appropriate time?


Day 3: Honor Others' Autonomy
Respecting the autonomy of others is a key aspect of Jesus's teachings. We are encouraged to avoid imposing our wisdom or advice when it is not sought, recognizing the individual journeys of those around us. This requires humility and a willingness to listen and understand others' perspectives. By honoring the autonomy of others, we align our actions with the principles of God's kingdom, fostering relationships built on mutual respect and understanding. [06:42]

"Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." (Philippians 2:4, ESV)

Reflection: Think of someone whose autonomy you may have overlooked. How can you better respect their journey and choices today?


Day 4: Balance in Relationships
In our relationships, it is important to be mindful of the balance between the wisdom we offer and the demand for it. Offering unsolicited advice can hinder rather than help, and we should be attentive to others' readiness and needs. This requires us to be observant and sensitive to the dynamics of our relationships, ensuring that our contributions are both helpful and desired. By doing so, we create an environment where genuine growth and understanding can flourish. [07:19]

"To make an apt answer is a joy to a man, and a word in season, how good it is!" (Proverbs 15:23, ESV)

Reflection: Reflect on a relationship where you often offer advice. How can you better gauge the other person's readiness and need for your input?


Day 5: Motivation by Love
When offering advice or correction, our motivation should be rooted in love. This means approaching others with discernment and humility, ensuring that our actions align with the principles of God's kingdom. By doing so, we foster genuine relationships that are characterized by love and understanding. This approach challenges us to examine our motives and to ensure that our interactions are driven by a desire to uplift and support others. [08:50]

"Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins." (1 Peter 4:8, ESV)

Reflection: Identify a situation where you need to offer correction. How can you ensure that your motivation is love and that your approach is gentle and humble?

Quotes

"Don't judge lest you be judged and the idea there is none of us know the full truth about anybody else. We're not in a position to judge and to judge means to condemn criticize we try to control other people by doing this we're relating to them in a wrong way." [00:01:44]

"Condemnation engineering doesn't work and it's precisely in that flow that Jesus says do not give dogs what is sacred do not throw your pearls to pigs if you do they may trample them under their feet and turn and tear you to pieces." [00:02:09]

"The issue here is not worthiness there are some people that are just not worthy of the wonderful things you have to say the issue is helpfulness when it comes to a pig the problem with a pearl isn't that the pig isn't worthy of the Pearl the Pearl doesn't help the pig." [00:03:13]

"The problem that Jesus is talking about here is we push our Pearl and you got to put Pearl in quotation marks we push our Pearls of Wisdom on other people whether they want them or not so this is not about the unworthiness of certain people." [00:04:31]

"The idea is now don't use unwanted advice wisdom that you think could be so great where you're assuming in a spirit of superiority I know what your problem is and I can fix you and the other person doesn't want it." [00:05:07]

"Don't give your dog what is Holy that's the same issue years years ago when Baxter was quite young and chewing everything up we got a nativity scene and it was all these little wood figures and we had it out and Baxter couldn't leave it alone he ate one of the Shepherds." [00:05:53]

"Love your enemies be like God who sends the rain on the righteous and the unrighteous and causes the sun to shine on the just and the unjust we're to be that same way he's not saying there are some people who are not worth your love or your wisdom." [00:06:27]

"Observe the law of supply and demand in your relationships with other people and the idea is this do not allow the supply of wisdom that you're offering in to exceed the demand for your wisdom that they're asking for and this happens all the time at work." [00:07:15]

"Be aware of the law of supply and demand when you're with somebody be a student of of them and their little kingdom as it's expressed in their body their faces their body language and their tone of voice and if somebody wants help if somebody needs wisdom and they're asking for your help by all means pray and then offer it." [00:08:23]

"When I do it is to be motivated by love and offered with as good discernment and judgment as I'm able to give and not this unthinking kneejerk Superior let me tell you what's wrong with you and how to fix it instead in the Kingdom I'm always studying the person that I love." [00:08:47]

"There is a law of supply and demand in human relationships that comes from the heart watch that one today make it a golden rule day don't be a pearl Pusher don't be a holy object thrower make it a golden rule day." [00:09:11]

"This is so much more than a YouTube channel it's really a community of people who are brought together not by our strengths or our ability to achieve but by our weaknesses and our need for help from God so we're glad that you're here." [00:09:36]

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Transcript
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