Intentional Friendships: Wisdom from Proverbs and Jesus

 

Summary

In our journey through the book of Proverbs, we are exploring the theme of wisdom for life, focusing today on the vital subject of friendship. Proverbs, as wise sayings, offer us guidance on how to live wisely, and they point us to Jesus Christ, in whom all wisdom is found. As we delve into the topic of friendship, we are reminded that relationships are central to our existence, reflecting the very nature of God, who is relational in His essence.

To cultivate good friendships, we must first seek them intentionally. Proverbs warns against isolation, emphasizing that we are created for community. We are encouraged to take a genuine interest in others, as exemplified by Timothy in the New Testament. The quality of our friendships is more important than the quantity, and we should focus on depth rather than breadth. Jesus Himself modeled different levels of friendship, from the crowds to the inner circle of Peter, James, and John, teaching us to open our lives most fully to those we trust deeply.

Choosing friends wisely is crucial, as the people we surround ourselves with will influence us significantly. Proverbs advises us to walk with the wise to become wise, while warning that the companion of fools will suffer harm. We must be discerning, allowing friendships to develop slowly as we observe character, ensuring that those we give deep access to our lives will positively influence us.

Guarding our friendships carefully is essential. Proverbs offers practical wisdom on being considerate and discreet, reminding us that over-demanding behavior or insensitivity can quickly erode relationships. We are called to honor the trust placed in us by our friends, maintaining confidentiality and respect.

Being a good friend involves presence, words, and love. A true friend is present in times of trouble, offers earnest counsel, and loves at all times. Jesus is the ultimate example of a true friend, offering us His constant presence, sweet counsel, and unwavering love. As we seek to be good friends, we are encouraged to walk closely with Jesus, the best friend we can have, who will transform us to be more like Him.

Key Takeaways:

- Seek Friends Intentionally: We are created for relationships, reflecting the relational nature of God. Isolation goes against sound judgment, and we are encouraged to take a genuine interest in others, as Timothy did. The quality of friendships is more important than the quantity, and we should focus on depth rather than breadth. [03:11]

- Choose Friends Wisely: The people we surround ourselves with influence us significantly. Walking with the wise makes us wise, while the companion of fools suffers harm. We must be discerning, allowing friendships to develop slowly as we observe character, ensuring positive influence. [13:39]

- Guard Friendships Carefully: Over-demanding behavior or insensitivity can erode relationships. Proverbs advises us to be considerate and discreet, maintaining confidentiality and respect. Honor the trust placed in us by our friends to preserve and strengthen our relationships. [19:00]

- Be a True Friend: A true friend is present in times of trouble, offers earnest counsel, and loves at all times. We are called to be present, speak words that uplift, and show constant love, following the example of Jesus, the ultimate friend. [27:08]

- Seek the Best Friend in Jesus: Jesus is the ultimate friend, offering constant presence, sweet counsel, and unwavering love. Walking closely with Him transforms us to be more like Him, as His love and wisdom guide us in all our relationships. [34:30]

Youtube Chapters:

- [00:00] - Welcome
- [00:15] - Introduction to Proverbs
- [01:16] - Proverbs and Jesus
- [02:01] - Series Overview
- [02:45] - How to Have Good Friends
- [03:11] - Seek Friends Intentionally
- [06:03] - Quality Over Quantity
- [09:00] - Levels of Friendship
- [13:39] - Choose Friends Wisely
- [18:45] - Guard Friendships Carefully
- [27:08] - Be a True Friend
- [34:30] - Seek the Best Friend in Jesus
- [39:52] - Closing Prayer

Study Guide

### Bible Study Discussion Guide

#### Bible Reading
1. Proverbs 18:1 - "Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment."
2. Proverbs 13:20 - "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm."
3. John 15:15 - "No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you."

#### Observation Questions
1. According to Proverbs 18:1, what is the consequence of isolating oneself? How does this relate to the relational nature of God? [03:25]
2. In the sermon, how does the pastor describe the different levels of friendship modeled by Jesus? [09:00]
3. What does Proverbs 13:20 suggest about the influence of the people we surround ourselves with? [13:52]
4. How does Jesus define friendship in John 15:15, and what does this reveal about His relationship with His disciples? [11:30]

#### Interpretation Questions
1. Why might Proverbs emphasize the importance of seeking friends intentionally rather than isolating oneself? How does this reflect God's design for community? [03:56]
2. How can the principle of "walking with the wise" be applied in choosing friends today? What characteristics should one look for in wise friends? [14:06]
3. In what ways does Jesus' model of friendship challenge contemporary views on relationships and social connections? [12:01]
4. How does the concept of guarding friendships carefully align with the biblical call to be considerate and discreet? [19:00]

#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on your current friendships. Are there any relationships where you need to seek greater depth rather than breadth? How can you take steps to deepen these connections? [06:03]
2. Consider the influence your closest friends have on you. Are there any changes you need to make in your circle to ensure positive influence? [15:39]
3. How can you be more intentional in seeking new friendships that align with the wisdom found in Proverbs? What practical steps can you take this week? [05:19]
4. Think about a time when you were not considerate or discreet in a friendship. What did you learn from that experience, and how can you apply that lesson to current relationships? [19:28]
5. Jesus is described as the ultimate friend. How can you cultivate a closer relationship with Him, and how might this impact your other friendships? [34:30]
6. Identify a friend who may be going through a difficult time. How can you be present for them, offering support and encouragement in a way that reflects Jesus' love? [29:22]
7. Reflect on the words you use with friends. Are there ways you can offer more earnest counsel and uplifting conversation? How can you start doing this today? [30:05]

Devotional

Day 1: Intentional Pursuit of Meaningful Friendships
To cultivate meaningful friendships, one must be intentional in seeking them. Proverbs emphasizes the importance of community, warning against isolation and encouraging us to take a genuine interest in others. This mirrors the relational nature of God. The quality of friendships is more important than the quantity, and we should focus on depth rather than breadth. Timothy, in the New Testament, exemplifies this by showing genuine care and interest in others. Jesus also modeled different levels of friendship, teaching us to open our lives most fully to those we trust deeply. [03:11]

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!" (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, ESV)

Reflection: Who in your life can you intentionally reach out to today to deepen your friendship? How can you show genuine interest in their life?


Day 2: The Influence of Wise Companions
Choosing friends wisely is crucial, as the people we surround ourselves with significantly influence us. Proverbs advises us to walk with the wise to become wise, while warning that the companion of fools will suffer harm. This calls for discernment, allowing friendships to develop slowly as we observe character, ensuring that those we give deep access to our lives will positively influence us. The process of choosing friends should be deliberate, as their impact on our lives can be profound. [13:39]

"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." (Proverbs 13:20, ESV)

Reflection: Reflect on your current circle of friends. Are there any relationships that may be negatively influencing you? What steps can you take to surround yourself with wise companions?


Day 3: Protecting the Bonds of Friendship
Guarding our friendships carefully is essential. Proverbs offers practical wisdom on being considerate and discreet, reminding us that over-demanding behavior or insensitivity can quickly erode relationships. We are called to honor the trust placed in us by our friends, maintaining confidentiality and respect. By being mindful of our actions and words, we can preserve and strengthen our friendships, ensuring they remain a source of support and encouragement. [19:00]

"Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing covered." (Proverbs 11:13, ESV)

Reflection: Consider a friendship that may need mending. How can you demonstrate trustworthiness and respect to rebuild and strengthen this relationship?


Day 4: Embodying True Friendship
Being a good friend involves presence, words, and love. A true friend is present in times of trouble, offers earnest counsel, and loves at all times. We are called to be present, speak words that uplift, and show constant love, following the example of Jesus, the ultimate friend. His life demonstrates the essence of true friendship, offering us a model to emulate in our own relationships. [27:08]

"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." (Proverbs 17:17, ESV)

Reflection: Think of a friend who is currently facing a difficult time. How can you be present and offer support to them today?


Day 5: Finding the Ultimate Friend in Jesus
Jesus is the ultimate friend, offering constant presence, sweet counsel, and unwavering love. Walking closely with Him transforms us to be more like Him, as His love and wisdom guide us in all our relationships. By seeking Jesus as our best friend, we can learn to embody His qualities in our interactions with others, fostering deeper and more meaningful connections. [34:30]

"No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you." (John 15:15, ESV)

Reflection: How can you deepen your relationship with Jesus today, allowing His friendship to transform your interactions with others?

Quotes


Whoever isolates himself you just keep yourself to yourself well you're seeking your own desire in other words the person who does this is really only concerned about himself or herself and if you are only concerned about yourself if you isolate yourself you break out the bible says against all sound judgment. [00:03:26]

Now this is very practical how are we to go about doing that and the answer is you seek friends intentionally by taking an active interest in other people there's a wonderful reference in the new testament scriptures where paul describes timothy and he says to the philippians this is philippians chapter 2 and verse 19 and 20. [00:05:11]

It's reminding us that it is possible to have a very wide circle of acquaintances or companions but to have no real friends and very simply the higher your profile is the faster your life goes the harder it is to form good deep lasting meaningful friendships and what can very easily happen is that in your relentless life you end up with many many acquaintances but few real friends and you find yourself feeling lonely in a crowd. [00:06:28]

The quality of your friends is more important than the quantity focus on depth rather than breadth and remember that the character of the friends you have is much more important than the number of them don't ask how many friends do i have ask how deep are my friendships. [00:07:10]

Jesus gives the closest access to himself to peter james and john they're the ones and only they who they're the only disciples who are there when he raises jairus from the dead they're the only disciples who are there when he goes up and reveals his glory on the mountain of transfiguration he's the they're the only three who are particularly invited to come with him in the garden of gethsemane a little further and to watch and pray. [00:09:14]

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise that's proverbs 13 and verse 20 but the companion of fools will suffer harm now you see what this is saying you become like the people that you walk with if you walk with wise people you will become wise and if you walk with those who are foolish it will bring harm to your life. [00:13:48]

The people with whom you are closest will have great influence on your life if you open your life up to them deeply they will have a significant influence in your life the character of the friends you walk with most closely will in some measure rub off on you and the deeper a friendship becomes the more like that friend you will be. [00:14:18]

Let friendship develop slowly character emerges over time good friendships are like fruit they need time to grow and they need time to ripen and some friendships end up being like the plants do you remember the plant that gave shade to jonah it grew up quickly and jonah was all excited about it and the next day what happened it withered as quickly as it grew up. [00:17:35]

Guard your friendships carefully first by being considerate i wonder if you know this proverb chapter 25 and verse 17 let your foot be seldom in your neighbor's house lest he have his fill of you and hate you well who hasn't experienced something of that sort the easiest way to kill a good friendship is to become over demanding. [00:19:13]

A close friend is someone who trusts you enough to have opened her or his heart to you and if you take what has been opened to you as a trust and then you whisper it around you break the trust on which the friendship is built and you will not have the friend for long honor what is said to you in private conversation. [00:25:46]

A true friend speaks into your life in a way that always does you good you want to be with this friend because their heart-to-heart conversation always lifts you up you see this in the friendship between david and jonathan where jonathan strengthened david's hand in the lord it's a beautiful phrase and it's a wonderful description of true friendship. [00:30:14]

The lord jesus christ is the best friend any of us here today can ever have think of this the true friend is present with you jesus christ is the only person who can ever say to you i will never leave you i will never forsake you no mortal person can say that to you but jesus christ can say i will never leave you. [00:34:57]

Chatbot

  • I'm an AI bot trained specifically on the sermon from Aug 23, 2021. Do you have any questions about it?

Transcript
What was the most surprising thing in this sermon?
Were there any personal stories shared?