The Insecurity Inside Me" - June 28, 2026

The filter of insecurity does not change what God made. It changes how a person sees what God made. Fear and faith can color life one way, bitterness can blind the heart another way, and labels can box a person in from the outside. Insecurity works from the inside. It is not mainly about what others say. It is about the image that stares back from the mirror and says, “not enough.”

Psalm 139 declares something better over the inward man. God formed the inward parts. God covered a person in the mother’s womb. God calls his works marvelous, and the “sum” of his thoughts is precious. God does not judge a life by one moment, one mistake, or one failure. God sees the whole thing, the big picture, and calls his work fearfully and wonderfully made.

Saul becomes the painful picture of what happens when a person cannot see in himself what God and others already see. First Samuel presents Saul as handsome, tall, chosen, appointed, and anointed. God could have chosen anyone in Israel, but God chose Saul. Yet Saul kept chasing what he already had. He kept trying to be king when he already was king.

Insecurity made Saul overreach. When Samuel delayed, when the people scattered, when the Philistines gathered, Saul perceived rejection everywhere. Saul felt compelled to offer what only the priest should offer. His fear of losing favor pushed him outside his calling, and the thing he feared began to come to pass because insecurity put him there.

Saul’s rejection deepened the wound. When Samuel pronounced judgment, Saul was less concerned with repentance than with saving face before the elders. Insecurity wanted an image preserved more than a heart restored. The need for approval became louder than the need to be right with God.

David then exposed Saul’s inner collapse. David’s victory over Goliath should have been Saul’s joy, because David’s success could have been a reflection of Saul’s leadership. Instead, Saul heard the women sing, “Saul has slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands,” and insecurity turned the “and” into a threat. David could have been Saul’s legacy, but insecurity made him Saul’s enemy.

God’s answer to insecurity is not more comparison or constant approval. God’s answer is security in what he has already said. The insecure heart must stop struggling to become what God has already defined, stop fixating on David, find voices that call out the best, and silence the inner rhetoric of failure with the truth that God made, chose, and loves his work.

##

Key Takeaways

• 1. Insecurity seeks already-given acceptance Saul wanted God’s approval so badly that he reached for what he already possessed. Insecurity often does not begin with the absence of love, but with the inability to rest in love already given. The heart can wear itself out begging for a smile from the very God who has already chosen, appointed, and anointed. [49:05]
• 2. Fear can manufacture its own loss Saul’s fears became real because his insecurity drove him into disobedience. The scattered people, the late prophet, and the nearby enemy all became proof in his mind that everything was falling apart. Insecurity can misread pressure as abandonment, then act in panic and create the very damage it dreaded. [52:52]
• 3. Comparison turns legacy into threat David could have been Saul’s joy, his student, and his legacy. Saul’s insecurity turned another man’s victory into a personal attack, even though David’s success did not diminish Saul’s calling. Comparison makes the heart hear “and” as “but,” and that small distortion can poison every relationship. [62:31]
• 4. Approval cannot heal self-rejection Saul asked Samuel to honor him before the people, but that public honor could not repair his private collapse. Insecurity often cares more about looking right than being made right. The image can be protected while the soul remains untouched, and that is a dangerous kind of religion. [55:36]
• 5. God defines before feelings agree God had already defined Saul before Saul ever felt secure enough to believe it. Feelings may lag behind calling, but feelings do not get the final word over what God has spoken. Security begins when the soul stops rehearsing failure as identity and starts replaying what God says is true.
  
  ## [66:18]

Youtube Chapters

• [00:00] - Welcome
• [31:15] - Filters Shape How Life Is Seen
• [33:47] - Saul And The Filter Of Insecurity
• [35:56] - Fearfully And Wonderfully Made
• [40:47] - Saul Could Not See Himself Clearly
• [45:59] - Chasing What He Already Had
• [49:42] - Overreaching For God’s Favor
• [54:14] - Rejection And Saving Face
• [57:40] - David Exposes Saul’s Fear
• [60:48] - Saul Resents David’s Victory
• [64:09] - Insecurity Turns Violent
• [66:18] - Four Words For The Insecure

1. 1 Samuel 9:1-2 — “There was a man of Benjamin whose name was Kish, the son of Abiel, the son of Zeror, the son of Becorath, the son of Aphiah, a Benjaminite, a man of wealth. And he had a son whose name was Saul, a handsome young man. There was not a man among the people of Israel more handsome than he. From his shoulders upward he was taller than any of the people.” [41:12]

1. In 1 Samuel 9:1-2, what details are given about Saul’s appearance, family, and presence among the people?
2. What are some of the filters named that can shape how a person sees life, and how is insecurity different from labels placed on a person from the outside? [31:15]
3. What signs in Saul’s story show that he was chasing what he already had instead of resting in what God had already given him? [46:15]
4. When the women sang, “Saul has slain his thousands, and David his ten thousands,” what word did Saul seem to mishear, and how did that change the way he responded to David? [01:02:31]

1. If Saul was already chosen, impressive, and publicly recognized, what does his story suggest about the real source of insecurity in a person’s life? [38:30]
2. Saul felt compelled to offer the sacrifice when the people scattered, Samuel delayed, and the enemy gathered. How can pressure and delay expose what a person truly believes about God and about himself? [51:33]
3. Saul asked to be honored before the elders even after admitting his sin. What does that reveal about the difference between protecting an image and pursuing repentance? [55:36]
4. David’s success could have become Saul’s legacy. What does Saul’s reaction to David reveal about what comparison does to relationships, leadership, and joy? [01:05:48]

1. When does the mirror tend to tell the soul “not enough”? Is it in parenting, work, ministry, friendship, marriage, or some other area? What usually triggers that inner voice? [43:45]
2. In what part of life is there a temptation to overreach or overcompensate in order to prove worth, gain approval, or calm fear? What might it look like to stay within God’s calling instead of forcing control? [49:42]
3. Has fear of losing something ever pushed behavior into panic, defensiveness, or disobedience? What was being protected in that moment, and what did that fear end up producing? [52:52]
4. Where is there a tendency to care more about looking okay than actually being okay before God? What would honest repentance look like in that area? [55:36]
5. Who is “David” right now—the person whose gifting, progress, praise, or success feels hard to celebrate? What would it look like to hear “and” instead of “but” in that relationship? [01:02:21]
6. What voices have the most influence over self-worth right now? Which voices call out fear and failure, and which ones call out what God has made and chosen? [01:08:01]
7. God’s truth has to become louder than the inner rhetoric of failure. What specific truth from Psalm 139 or from Saul’s story needs to be rehearsed this week when insecurity starts talking? [01:09:16]