Influence and Discipleship in Our Relationships

Devotional

Day 1: Your Character Shapes Your Influence

Who you are when no one is watching is the foundation of your influence on others. True character is not about outward appearances or public actions, but about the integrity and godliness that define your private life. The ongoing battle within—between the old self and the new life in Christ—requires intentional discipline, as the passions of the flesh must be put to death so that your life reflects your identity in Christ. When your character is rooted in Christ, it will naturally shape the mark you leave on those around you, even if you are unaware of it in the moment. [24:31]

1 Peter 2:11
"Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul." (ESV)

Reflection: In what private area of your life do you sense God calling you to greater integrity or self-control, and what is one step you can take today to align your character more closely with Christ?

Day 2: Honorable Conduct Before the World

Your actions and the way you carry yourself—your conduct—speak volumes to those around you, often more than your words ever could. Living honorably means that even those who reject God are compelled to reckon with Him because of the beauty and consistency of your life. This does not guarantee approval or praise from others; in fact, you may be misunderstood or even maligned. Yet, by maintaining honorable conduct, you silence criticism and point others to God, leaving a legacy that endures beyond your words. [31:40]

1 Peter 2:12
"Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation." (ESV)

Reflection: Think of a situation where you are tempted to compromise your conduct; how can you choose to act honorably this week, even if it goes unnoticed or is misunderstood?

Day 3: Living Out Your Calling in Christ

Freedom in Christ is not a license to do whatever you want, but a call to align your life with God’s purposes. True freedom is found in living as a servant of God, submitting to the authorities He has placed and honoring Him in all things. This alignment brings purpose and direction, like a train on its tracks, and ensures that your influence is not self-serving but points others to Christ. Your calling is to live for Him, letting every aspect of your life—public and private—bring Him glory. [38:49]

1 Peter 2:16
"Live as people who are free, not using your freedom as a cover-up for evil, but living as servants of God." (ESV)

Reflection: Where are you tempted to use your freedom for yourself rather than for God’s purposes, and what would it look like to realign that area of your life to serve Him today?

Day 4: Caring for Others Through Connection and Encouragement

Caring for others begins with intentional connection—seeing, acknowledging, and responding to the real needs of those around you. Jesus modeled this by noticing people, understanding their struggles, and moving toward them with compassion. True care is not passive; it involves taking action, offering encouragement, and meeting needs both in word and deed. When you honor everyone, love the brotherhood, and encourage those in your sphere, you reflect Christ’s love and open doors for deeper influence. [44:46]

Proverbs 16:24
"Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body." (ESV)

Reflection: Who is one person you can intentionally connect with and encourage this week—through a word, a note, or an act of service—and how will you take that step?

Day 5: Discipleship Happens Through Everyday Influence

Every believer is called to make disciples, and this happens not just through formal teaching but through the everyday influence you have in your relationships. Your life is a living example of Christ to those who may never read the Bible but are reading you. By being intentional in your relationships—at home, at work, and in your community—you participate in God’s mission to discover, develop, and deploy disciples. Your influence, no matter how small it seems, is part of God’s greater story of redemption. [13:06]

Matthew 28:19-20
"Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age." (ESV)

Reflection: Who in your daily life is “reading” you as their example of Christ, and what is one intentional way you can point them to Jesus this week?

Sermon Summary

In a world obsessed with celebrity and social media influence, it’s easy to believe that true impact is reserved for those with massive followings or positions of authority. Yet, every person leaves a mark on the lives around them, whether or not they recognize it. Influence is not just about numbers or titles; it’s about the effect our lives have in shaping the voluntary thoughts, attitudes, and actions of others. Each of us, in our homes, workplaces, and communities, are influencers—our lives are like thumbprints pressed into the wet cement of those we encounter.

The call is to be intentional with this influence, especially as followers of Christ. Our relationships are the primary context for discipleship, and the way we live can either draw people toward Christ or push them away. The apostle Peter, writing to believers facing hostility, urges them to live as sojourners and exiles, abstaining from the passions of the flesh and keeping their conduct honorable among those who do not know God. Even when misunderstood or maligned, a life marked by integrity and goodness can silence critics and point others to God.

Influence is built on four foundational blocks: character, conduct, calling, and care. Character is who we are when no one is watching—the private reality that undergirds all public action. Conduct is not just what we do, but how we do it; it’s living honorably in a way that even those who reject God are forced to reckon with Him. Our calling reminds us that freedom in Christ is not autonomy, but alignment with God’s purposes—living as servants, not just for ourselves, but for the sake of others. Finally, care is the practical outworking of love: connecting with people, acknowledging their needs, responding intentionally, and encouraging them in word and deed.

Every believer is called to discover, develop, and deploy disciples who are “all in” for God’s kingdom. This mission is lived out not in grand gestures, but in the daily, faithful presence we offer to those around us. The question is not whether we have influence, but what kind of influence we are having. May our lives be marked by Christlike character, honorable conduct, a clear sense of calling, and genuine care—so that those who “read” us might ultimately see and glorify God.

Key Takeaways

1. Influence is not measured by the size of your audience or your position, but by the voluntary impact your life has on others. Every person, regardless of their platform, leaves a mark—often in ways they may never fully realize. The question is not if you are influencing, but how and toward what end. [06:14]
2. Character is the foundation of lasting influence. Who you are in private, when no one is watching, will inevitably shape your public impact. Charisma and competency may open doors, but only character can sustain true, godly influence over time. [22:08]
3. Honorable conduct means living in such a way that even those who oppose or misunderstand you are compelled to reckon with the reality of God. It’s not just about ethical behavior, but about a beauty and consistency of life that points beyond yourself. Even in the face of criticism or hostility, let your deeds speak louder than your words. [29:11]
4. Freedom in Christ is not a license for self-indulgence, but a call to align your life with God’s purposes. True freedom is found in living as a servant of God, submitting to His authority and honoring those He has placed in your life—even when it’s difficult. This alignment brings both power and purpose to your influence. [38:07]
5. Genuine care is the practical expression of Christlike influence. It involves intentionally connecting with others, acknowledging their unique needs, responding with compassion, and encouraging them through both words and actions. Influence grows not through grand gestures, but through consistent, humble acts of love in everyday relationships. [41:47]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[00:32] - The Game: Recognizing Influencers
[03:58] - The Nature of Influence
[06:14] - Defining Influence vs. Authority
[08:02] - Spheres of Influence in Everyday Life
[09:34] - Being Read as a Christian
[11:17] - Influence and Intentional Relationships
[13:06] - Discover, Develop, Deploy Disciples
[14:29] - Context of 1 Peter: Suffering and Witness
[15:30] - Living as Sojourners and Exiles
[20:06] - Building Block 1: Character
[27:00] - Building Block 2: Conduct
[36:23] - Building Block 3: Calling and Freedom
[41:47] - Building Block 4: Care (Connect, Acknowledge, Respond, Encourage)
[46:11] - Everyday Influence and Final Challenge

Bible Study Guide

Bible Reading

1 Peter 2:11-17 (ESV) — 11 Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul.
12 Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation.
13 Be subject for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether it be to the emperor as supreme
14 or to governors as sent by him to punish those who do evil and to praise those who do good.
15 For this is the will of God, that by doing good you should put to silence the ignorance of foolish people.
16 Live as people who are free, not using your freedom as a cover-up for evil, but living as servants of God.
17 Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor.

Observation Questions

According to 1 Peter 2:11-12, what does Peter urge believers to do as “sojourners and exiles,” and what is the intended result of this behavior among those who do not know God?
In verse 16, Peter talks about living as people who are free. What does he say about how this freedom should and should not be used?
The sermon described four “building blocks” of influence: character, conduct, calling, and care. What does the passage say about each of these, either directly or indirectly? [[20:06]]
What does Peter command in verse 17 regarding how we treat different groups of people (everyone, the brotherhood, God, the emperor)?

Interpretation Questions

The sermon said, “Influence is the effect of your life in shaping the voluntary thoughts, attitudes, and actions of others.” How does Peter’s instruction to “keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable” relate to this idea of influence? [[06:14]]
Why do you think Peter emphasizes both private character (“abstain from the passions of the flesh”) and public conduct (“keep your conduct honorable”)? How are these connected in shaping our influence? [[20:06]]
The sermon mentioned that “freedom in Christ is not autonomy, but alignment with God’s purposes.” How does this understanding of freedom challenge common ideas about what it means to be “free”? [[38:07]]
The fourth building block is “care,” described as connecting, acknowledging, responding, and encouraging others. Why is genuine care essential for Christlike influence, according to both Peter and the sermon? [[41:47]]

Application Questions

The sermon said, “Every person, regardless of their platform, leaves a mark—often in ways they may never fully realize.” Who are the people in your closest spheres of influence (home, work, community)? What kind of mark do you think you are leaving on them right now? [[08:02]]
Character is described as “who you are when no one is watching.” Are there areas of your private life that you sense are not aligned with your public witness? What is one step you could take this week to strengthen your character? [[23:28]]
Peter calls us to “keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable.” Can you think of a recent situation where your actions were observed by someone who does not share your faith? Did your conduct point them toward or away from Christ? What would you do the same or differently next time? [[29:11]]
The sermon challenged us to see freedom in Christ as “alignment” rather than “autonomy.” Is there an area of your life where you have been using your freedom for yourself rather than for God’s purposes or the good of others? What would it look like to realign in that area? [[38:07]]
The “care” acronym (Connect, Acknowledge, Respond, Encourage) was given as a practical way to influence others. Choose one person in your life who needs care. What is one specific action you can take this week to connect with them, acknowledge their need, respond, or encourage them? [[41:47]]
The sermon said, “The question is not whether we have influence, but what kind of influence we are having.” What is one area where you want your influence to be more Christlike? What is a practical next step you can take? [[18:49]]
Peter instructs us to “honor everyone.” Is there someone in your life who is difficult for you to honor or respect? What would it look like to honor them in a Christlike way this week? [[41:04]]

Sermon Clips

If many of us don't think of ourselves as influencers, do recognize that within even our own homes, we have a way of doing that. We know that there are people in our lives who have the impact on us. And so, even though you may not think of yourself as an influencer, it's probably easy to look at the people around you and notice the influence that they're having. [00:17:27] (24 seconds) #RecognizeYourInfluence

If it's true that the people around us, that we naturally, by human relationship, have impact on the people closest to us, the question then is what kind of impact are you having? If you are having an impact, what kind? [00:18:40] (16 seconds) #ImpactWithPurpose

If Christ has been crucified and with him your sins and your past self has been nailed to the cross, has been taken to the grave. He's saying simply, don't let the old self and its passions continue to drive the vehicle of your life. Those things have been crucified so crucify them and he talks about it here by abstaining from the passions of the flesh and he's not talking about you know our bodies against our souls and this this pitted argument and and uh tension between the two he's talking about abstaining from the passions of the flesh meaning that sinful nature that's still not been put to death inside of you that still creeps up from time to time it's those character impulses that that in that moment you want to lash out in that moment you want to you want to give yourself to all anxiety and concern or or frustration whatever that may be or the or the lustful passions of your heart but Paul or Peter is saying listen abstain from those things literally abstaining he's saying let's cut them off cut them off he talks about the the picture of it in in that you're not giving oxygen to those things you starve them out why why because it's not you anymore you've been changed your character will shape and does shape the influence that you have on other people. [00:24:44] (83 seconds) #CrucifyOldSelf

To respond is to look and to acknowledge and connect with someone and interact with them in a way that intentionally moves towards meeting their needs. Towards showing up in those moments. To being Christ to them in whatever circumstance they may be going through. Whether it's your child or a neighbor or a long lost high school friend. Being Christ to others. [00:43:55] (25 seconds) #EncourageWithWordsAndDeeds

There's an old adage that just, it says people don't, people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. Right? Developing influence in the lives of others and providing opportunities where we can speak the truth of God's word and share the gospel starts with building those connections and showing them how much we really care for them as a person. [00:45:55] (23 seconds) #InfluenceInYourSphere

Each of you guys are an influencer in some way, shape, or form. Probably isn't involved with millions of followers on TikTok or YouTube, and that's fine. But God has strategically and intentionally placed you where you are within the spheres of influence that you have today to have influence on you. Those people. And you never know what God will and can do by his people loving the people around him. [00:46:17] (29 seconds)

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