Gratitude in Marriage

As we enter this season of Thanksgiving, it’s important to pause and truly reflect on the gift of gratitude—not just as a fleeting feeling, but as a posture of the heart that shapes every relationship in our lives. While the world often rushes past Thanksgiving in anticipation of Christmas, we’re taking time to focus on gratitude, beginning with its impact on marriage. God’s vision for marriage is rooted in unity, covenant, and a reflection of His own relationship with us. Genesis reminds us that marriage is designed for two to become one, and Ephesians draws a direct line between the sacrificial love of Christ for the church and the love spouses are called to show one another.

Gratitude in marriage isn’t just about saying “thank you” or exchanging cards; it’s about intentionally investing in one another, protecting the relationship, and refusing to take each other for granted. Over time, it’s easy to drift apart through small, unnoticed decisions or simple neglect. But just as a lack of gratitude can create distance, intentional acts of thankfulness—listening, forgiving, spending quality time, and offering grace—can restore and strengthen the bond God intended.

This isn’t just for married couples. The principles of gratitude, grace, and intentional investment apply to all relationships—family, friends, coworkers, and especially our relationship with God. We’re called to give thanks in all circumstances, to forgive as Christ forgave us, and to communicate with honesty and vulnerability. These small, daily choices are the building blocks of healthy, God-honoring relationships.

As a church, we’re committed to walking alongside you in this journey. We’re investing in resources and programs like Grace Marriage to help couples proactively nurture their relationship, not just react when things get tough. Our hope is to be a community that values discipleship, unity, and growth—not only in our marriages but in every area of life. Ultimately, gratitude is a reflection of the gospel: Christ’s sacrificial love for us, and our response to Him and to one another.

Key Takeaways

• 1. Gratitude is a Heart Posture, Not Just a Polite Gesture True gratitude goes beyond words or gifts; it’s a matter of the heart that shapes how we see and treat others. When we intentionally express thankfulness, we honor both God and those around us, fueling relationships rather than draining them. This heart posture is essential for deep, lasting connection. [25:27]
• 2. Marriage Reflects God’s Covenant and the Gospel God’s design for marriage is rooted in unity, covenant, and sacrificial love—a living picture of Christ’s relationship with the church. When spouses love and serve each other selflessly, they mirror the gospel to the world. This vision calls us to protect, invest in, and honor our marriages as sacred. [34:29]
• 3. Small, Intentional Acts Restore and Protect Relationships Drift in marriage and other relationships often happens gradually, through neglect or busyness. But small, intentional steps—like putting down the phone, making time to talk, or offering forgiveness—can restore closeness and realign us with God’s design. These simple actions, repeated over time, have transformative power. [53:29]
• 4. Gratitude and Grace Go Hand in Hand Offering grace—especially when it’s undeserved—is one of the most powerful ways to show gratitude. Forgiveness, kindness, and compassion are not just responses to good behavior, but reflections of Christ’s love for us. Practicing grace in our relationships, even when it’s hard, is a mark of spiritual maturity and deep gratitude. [46:31]
• 5. Proactive Discipleship Strengthens Marriages and Community Investing in marriage enrichment and discipleship isn’t just for couples in crisis; it’s a proactive way to build resilience, communication, and joy. Programs like Grace Marriage provide tools and community support to help couples thrive, reflecting the church’s commitment to nurture strong, Christ-centered relationships. [56:06]

Youtube Chapters

• [00:00] - Welcome
• [21:47] - Opening Prayer and Gratitude
• [22:51] - Introducing the Gratitude Series
• [23:56] - The Power of Gratitude in Community
• [24:56] - What is True Gratitude?
• [26:51] - Gratitude in Marriage: Why It Matters
• [27:42] - God’s Vision for Marriage
• [29:06] - The Strength of Unity
• [32:00] - Marriage as Covenant, Not Convenience
• [33:57] - Marriage as a Picture of the Gospel
• [36:57] - Protecting and Honoring Marriage
• [39:33] - The Drift: How Distance Happens
• [44:12] - Practical Ways to Show Gratitude
• [50:06] - Intimacy and Quality Time
• [53:11] - Small Changes, Big Impact
• [54:45] - Church Support and Grace Marriage
• [56:06] - Why Invest in Marriage Discipleship?
• [59:04] - Invitation and Next Steps
• [62:15] - Celebrating Church Growth and Service
• [66:35] - Vision for Worship and Technology
• [70:40] - Closing Prayer and Blessing

Bible Reading

Genesis 2:24 (ESV) — > Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Ephesians 5:25-28 (ESV) — > Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

1 Thessalonians 5:18 (ESV) — > Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Observation Questions

1. According to Genesis 2:24, what is God’s original design for marriage? What does it mean for two to become “one flesh”?
2. In Ephesians 5:25-28, what kind of love are husbands called to show their wives? How is this love compared to Christ’s love for the church?
3. The sermon said, “Gratitude is a matter of the heart. And when we lean right back in to show gratitude to others in what we do and how we act and how we treat them, then it benefits us and it also benefits them.” ([25:27]) What are some practical ways the sermon described showing gratitude in relationships?
4. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 tells us to “give thanks in all circumstances.” What does “all circumstances” include, according to the sermon? ([45:14])

Interpretation Questions

1. The sermon described marriage as a covenant, not just a contract or convenience. Why is this distinction important for how we view and invest in marriage? ([32:00])
2. Ephesians 5 connects the love between spouses to the sacrificial love of Christ. What does it look like, practically, for a spouse to love with this kind of selflessness? ([34:29])
3. The sermon mentioned that “drift” in relationships often happens gradually, through small, unnoticed decisions or neglect. What are some examples of this drift, and why is it so easy to miss? ([39:33])
4. The message said, “Offering grace—especially when it’s undeserved—is one of the most powerful ways to show gratitude.” How does forgiveness and grace reflect Christ’s love in our relationships? ([46:31])

Application Questions

1. The sermon challenged us to see gratitude as a “posture of the heart,” not just a polite gesture. Think about your closest relationships (marriage, family, friends). What is one way you can intentionally express gratitude this week beyond just saying “thank you”? ([25:27])
2. For those who are married: Are there small habits or routines in your marriage that have led to “drift” or distance? What is one small, intentional step you could take this week to move closer together? (e.g., putting down your phone, making time to talk, offering forgiveness) ([53:29])
3. The sermon said, “Gratitude and grace go hand in hand.” Is there someone in your life—spouse, family member, friend, coworker—who needs to receive grace from you, even if they don’t deserve it? What would it look like to offer that grace this week? ([46:31])
4. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 calls us to give thanks in all circumstances. Is there a difficult situation in your life right now where it’s hard to be thankful? What would it look like to practice gratitude in that circumstance? ([45:14])
5. The sermon highlighted the importance of proactive investment in relationships, not just reacting when things get tough. What is one way you can proactively invest in a key relationship this month—before there’s a problem? ([56:06])
6. For those not married: The principles of gratitude, grace, and intentional investment apply to all relationships. Which relationship in your life needs more intentional gratitude or grace? What’s a specific action you can take this week?
7. The church is offering resources like Grace Marriage to help couples grow. If you’re married, what’s holding you back from investing in your marriage in this way? If you’re not married, what’s one resource or habit you could pursue to strengthen your other relationships? ([56:06])