Sunday, May 17, 2026 - Godly Men (10:45am)

Song of Songs sets the tone as wisdom for love in the courtship years, painting a back‑and‑forth where desire is tender, poetic, and formative. The young woman names herself a common spring crocus, small and forgettable. The young man refuses that low ceiling and answers, like a lily among thorns, she is singular, radiant, chosen. His images keep stacking. A lily among thistles. A rare mare among Pharaoh’s stallions. His language keeps doing the same work: ascribing worth, naming beauty, placing honor on her person, not only her appearance. This steady affirmation lands as security. The relationship’s ground firms up when value is voiced and reinforced.

Provision and protection move the wisdom forward. The groom provides not only by labor but by presence. He shows up. He walks her into the banquet hall. His nearness lands on her soul like Ein Gedi in the desert, an oasis of rest, refreshment, and life. That kind of presence becomes provision. Protection then takes shape in vigilance. The vineyard is blossoming and vulnerable, so the call rises to catch the little foxes before they burrow and spoil the roots. The threats are real from outside, but the most dangerous saboteur may be an untrained self. First Timothy calls that out with clarity. Physical training is good. Training for godliness is better. Character growth becomes protection.

Leadership arrives in a different register. The young man comes leaping over hills and mountains to her window, and his voice does not demand. It invites. Arise, my love. Come away with me. That pattern lands between two bad extremes, neither dictating control nor passive abdication. The wise road is strength with gentleness, initiative with invitation. Lead with a let’s becomes a memorable path for spiritual influence. Let’s pray. Let’s open the Word. Let’s go to worship. The data may be lopsided, but Scripture already said it plainly in Ephesians 5. A husband’s pattern is Christ’s own way. Love like Christ. Give yourself up. Feed and care as for one’s own body. Lift her even at cost to self.

Christ himself anchors the whole picture. His love does not wait for dove‑like eyes or springtime vigor. While sinners, he initiates, moves toward, and sacrifices. Communion remembers that movement. His body and blood become the ground and power for husbands to affirm, provide, protect, initiate, and invite. The Spirit’s sanctifying work then turns aspiration into lived character.

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Key Takeaways

• 1. Affirm her value with words Affirmation is not fluff; it is formation. Song of Songs shows the groom naming her worth until security settles in. Specific praise of her person and godly character lays a foundation that holds when pressure comes. Consistent honor becomes the climate where love can deepen. [50:08]
• 2. Provide presence that becomes oasis Provision is more than a paycheck; it is a felt nearness that calms. The bride calls his presence an Ein Gedi, an oasis in a scorched place, because his nearness brings rest, refreshment, and life. Ask what one’s presence currently brings, then train it toward peace, patience, and steadiness. Presence is a gift only the husband can give. [58:56]
• 3. Protect intimacy from little foxes Vineyards in bloom are tender, and small foxes do big damage. Threats can be external, but the most subversive fox often lives inside an unexamined self. Training for godliness outruns image‑management, reshaping habits that gnaw at roots. Catching foxes is character work done before catastrophe arrives. [60:20]
• 4. Lead by initiating and inviting The groom moves toward and then invites, not commands. Wise leadership rejects both control and passivity, choosing humble strength that opens doors and walks through them together. Lead with a let’s turns spiritual influence into a shared pilgrimage instead of a power play. Initiative pairs with gentleness when the aim is her good. [67:38]
• 5. Let Christ set the pattern Ephesians 5 puts the template in Christ’s hands, not culture’s. His love gives himself up, cleanses by the Word, and lifts the bride toward glory. That sacrificial arc reframes leadership as service and resets success as her flourishing. The standard is high, but the grace to live it comes from the same Lord who calls it. [69:46]

Youtube Chapters

• [00:00] - Welcome
• [14:12] - Next steps and giving
• [40:27] - Love Letter series intro
• [41:58] - Why Song of Songs and PG-13 note
• [45:18] - Reading Song of Songs 2
• [47:38] - Affirm her value
• [51:03] - Mare among stallions image
• [53:50] - Affirmation and security
• [54:54] - Provide and protect
• [58:21] - En Gedi: presence as oasis
• [60:20] - Catch the little foxes
• [64:47] - Initiate and invite leadership
• [67:38] - Lead with a let’s
• [69:46] - Ephesians 5 pattern
• [81:30] - Communion and closing

Bible Reading
Song of Songs 2:1-2, 15 (ESV)
1 I am a rose of Sharon, a lily of the valleys.
2 As a lily among brambles, so is my love among the young women.
15 Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom.

Ephesians 5:25-29 (ESV)
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church.

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Observation Questions

1. In Song of Songs 2:1-2, how does the groom’s description of his beloved contrast with her self-description? What imagery does he use to affirm her value?
2. According to Ephesians 5:25-29, what specific actions and attitudes are husbands called to embody in loving their wives?
3. The sermon mentions “little foxes” as threats to relationships ([01:00:20]). What examples of “little foxes” were given in the sermon that could damage intimacy?

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Interpretation Questions

1. Why might consistent verbal affirmation (as seen in Song of Songs) create security in a relationship? How does this reflect God’s heart for His people?
2. Ephesians 5 compares a husband’s love to Christ’s sacrificial love for the church. What does it look like to lead with “strength and gentleness” rather than control or passivity ([01:07:38])?
3. The sermon warns that “the most dangerous fox” might be an untrained self ([01:01:44]). How can unresolved character flaws erode trust and intimacy over time?

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Application Questions

1. What is one specific way you can intentionally affirm someone’s value this week—not just their appearance, but their character or actions?
2. How could your presence (time, attention, emotional availability) become an “oasis” for someone feeling weary or overwhelmed ([58:56])? What habits might need to change to make this possible?
3. Identify one “little fox” in your life (e.g., distraction, pride, impatience) that could harm your closest relationships. What practical step will you take to “catch” it this week?
4. The sermon encourages leading with “let’s” ([01:07:38]). How could you initiate a spiritual conversation or activity (e.g., prayer, serving, studying Scripture) with humility and invitation?
5. Reflect on Christ’s sacrificial love in Ephesians 5. What is one way you can sacrificially prioritize another person’s flourishing, even if it costs you comfort or convenience?