God First Parenting: Influencing Lives Through Christ
Summary
In today's message, we explored the profound concept of "God First Parenting," a principle that extends beyond just those with children to anyone who holds influence over others. We began by acknowledging that influence is a universal trait, whether in parenting, coaching, or mentoring. The story of Michael Jordan and his high school coach, Clifton Pop Herring, illustrated the power of encouragement and guidance in shaping lives. This influence is not limited to parents but is applicable to anyone who interacts with others.
We delved into the importance of building a solid foundation in Christ, emphasizing that whatever we are now will be amplified when we have a family. Jesus' teaching on building on a solid foundation was highlighted, reminding us that storms will come, but a life built on Christ will endure. We were encouraged to reflect on our current habits and how they align with God's principles, regardless of our life stage.
Proverbs 22:6 served as a central scripture, urging us to "train up a child in the way he should go." This training involves more than just instructing on what to do; it requires teaching the "why" behind actions. We discussed the importance of guiding rather than taking over, allowing children to learn through experience and even failure. This approach fosters independence and critical thinking, preparing them for life's challenges.
The message also addressed the significance of discipline and correction, emphasizing that wise discipline imparts wisdom. We were reminded that correction should be rooted in care and clarity, ensuring that our children understand the reasons behind our guidance. The analogy of children as arrows in a warrior's hand from Psalm 127 illustrated the importance of shaping and sharpening them for the battles they will face.
Ultimately, the message underscored that God First Parenting begins with God First Living. Our lives must be fully surrendered to Christ, serving as a model for our children and those we influence. The story of Moses and his parents, Amram and Jochebed, highlighted the lasting impact of instilling God's truth in our children, even amidst cultural pressures. We were encouraged to stand on the promises of Proverbs 22, trusting that the seeds we plant will bear fruit in due time.
Key Takeaways:
1. Influence Beyond Parenting: Influence is a universal trait, not limited to parents. Whether you're a coach, mentor, or friend, your guidance can shape lives. Like Michael Jordan's coach, Clifton Pop Herring, we can encourage and guide others to overcome setbacks and achieve greatness. [03:45]
2. Building on a Solid Foundation: Jesus' teaching on building on a solid foundation reminds us that storms will come, but a life built on Christ will endure. Reflect on your current habits and how they align with God's principles, regardless of your life stage. [09:12]
3. Guiding, Not Taking Over: Effective parenting and mentoring involve guiding rather than taking over. Allow children to learn through experience and even failure, fostering independence and critical thinking. This approach prepares them for life's challenges. [16:21]
4. Wise Discipline and Correction: Wise discipline imparts wisdom. Correction should be rooted in care and clarity, ensuring that children understand the reasons behind our guidance. This approach builds trust and respect. [27:27]
5. God First Living: God First Parenting begins with God First Living. Our lives must be fully surrendered to Christ, serving as a model for our children and those we influence. Stand on the promises of Proverbs 22, trusting that the seeds we plant will bear fruit in due time. [38:35]
Youtube Chapters:
- [00:00] - Welcome
- [00:45] - Introduction to God First Series
- [02:30] - Influence Beyond Parenting
- [03:45] - The Story of Michael Jordan
- [06:15] - Building a Solid Foundation
- [09:12] - Jesus' Teaching on Foundations
- [11:30] - Questions for Reflection
- [13:45] - Proverbs 22:6 Explained
- [16:21] - Guiding, Not Taking Over
- [19:00] - Keeping Kids Talking
- [23:19] - Permission to Fail
- [27:27] - Wise Discipline and Correction
- [30:58] - Modeling Christ for Our Children
- [34:21] - Longevity and Trusting the Process
- [38:35] - The Story of Moses and His Parents
- [42:00] - God First Living and Conclusion
Study Guide
Bible Study Discussion Guide: God First Parenting
Bible Reading:
1. Proverbs 22:6 - "Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it."
2. Psalm 127:3-5 - "Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them."
3. Ephesians 6:4 - "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."
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Observation Questions:
1. What does Proverbs 22:6 suggest about the long-term impact of early training and guidance? How does this align with the sermon’s emphasis on influence beyond parenting? [16:21]
2. In Psalm 127, children are compared to arrows in a warrior's hand. What does this analogy imply about the role of parents or mentors in shaping the lives of young people? [30:58]
3. According to Ephesians 6:4, what are the two contrasting approaches to parenting mentioned, and what outcomes do they lead to? [34:21]
4. How did the story of Michael Jordan and his coach illustrate the power of influence and encouragement? [03:45]
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Interpretation Questions:
1. How might the principle of "God First Living" influence the way one approaches parenting or mentorship? Consider the sermon’s emphasis on modeling Christ-like behavior. [38:35]
2. What are the potential consequences of failing to provide wise discipline and correction, as discussed in the sermon? How does this relate to the biblical instruction in Proverbs 29? [27:27]
3. How does the analogy of children as arrows in Psalm 127 inform our understanding of the responsibilities of those who influence young people? [30:58]
4. In what ways does the story of Moses and his parents, Amram and Jochebed, demonstrate the importance of instilling God’s truth in children despite cultural pressures? [38:35]
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Application Questions:
1. Reflect on your current habits and lifestyle. How do they align with the principle of "God First Living"? What changes might you need to make to better model this for those you influence? [38:35]
2. Think of a time when you had to guide someone without taking over. How did you handle it, and what did you learn from the experience? How can you apply this lesson in your current relationships? [16:21]
3. Consider the role of discipline in your life or in the lives of those you influence. How can you ensure that your approach to discipline is rooted in care and clarity? [27:27]
4. Identify a young person in your life whom you can mentor or guide. What practical steps can you take to shape and sharpen them, as described in Psalm 127? [30:58]
5. How can you create an environment that encourages open communication with those you influence, similar to the sermon’s advice on keeping kids talking? [23:19]
6. Reflect on a cultural pressure you or someone you influence is currently facing. How can you stand firm in God’s truth and model this for others, as seen in the story of Moses? [38:35]
7. What specific actions can you take this week to live a life fully surrendered to Christ, thereby setting an example for others to follow? [38:35]
Devotional
Day 1: Influence Beyond Parenting
Influence is a powerful tool that extends beyond the realm of parenting, touching every relationship where guidance and encouragement are present. Whether you are a coach, mentor, or friend, your words and actions can significantly shape the lives of those around you. The story of Michael Jordan and his high school coach, Clifton Pop Herring, serves as a poignant reminder of the impact that encouragement and belief can have on an individual's journey. This influence is not confined to parents but is a universal trait that can inspire others to overcome setbacks and achieve greatness. As you interact with others, consider how your influence can be a force for positive change, helping others to realize their potential and navigate life's challenges. [03:45]
"Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity." (1 Timothy 4:12, ESV)
Reflection: Who in your life can you encourage today, and how can you use your influence to help them overcome a current challenge?
Day 2: Building on a Solid Foundation
Building a life on a solid foundation is essential for enduring the inevitable storms that life brings. Jesus' teaching on this principle emphasizes the importance of aligning our habits and actions with God's principles, regardless of our life stage. A life built on Christ is resilient and steadfast, able to withstand trials and tribulations. Reflect on your current habits and consider how they align with the teachings of Christ. Are you building your life on a foundation that will endure, or are there areas that need strengthening? By examining your daily practices, you can ensure that your life is rooted in a foundation that will support you through life's challenges. [09:12]
"Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock." (Matthew 7:24, ESV)
Reflection: What is one habit you can change today to better align your life with the teachings of Christ?
Day 3: Guiding, Not Taking Over
Effective parenting and mentoring involve guiding rather than taking over, allowing children and mentees to learn through experience and even failure. This approach fosters independence and critical thinking, preparing them for life's challenges. By stepping back and allowing others to navigate their paths, you empower them to develop the skills and resilience needed to face future obstacles. This method of guidance is not about relinquishing responsibility but about providing the support and encouragement necessary for growth. Consider how you can apply this principle in your relationships, offering guidance while allowing others the space to learn and grow. [16:21]
"Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4, ESV)
Reflection: How can you provide guidance to someone in your life today without taking over their decision-making process?
Day 4: Wise Discipline and Correction
Wise discipline imparts wisdom and should be rooted in care and clarity. When correcting others, it is essential to ensure that they understand the reasons behind your guidance, building trust and respect in the process. Discipline is not merely about enforcing rules but about teaching and nurturing growth. By approaching correction with love and understanding, you create an environment where wisdom can flourish, and relationships can deepen. Reflect on how you can apply wise discipline in your interactions, ensuring that your guidance is both clear and compassionate. [27:27]
"Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid." (Proverbs 12:1, ESV)
Reflection: Think of a recent situation where you had to correct someone. How could you have approached it differently to ensure the correction was rooted in care and clarity?
Day 5: God First Living
God First Parenting begins with God First Living, where our lives are fully surrendered to Christ, serving as a model for our children and those we influence. By prioritizing a relationship with God, you set an example for others to follow, demonstrating the importance of living a life aligned with His teachings. The story of Moses and his parents, Amram and Jochebed, illustrates the lasting impact of instilling God's truth in our children, even amidst cultural pressures. Stand on the promises of Proverbs 22, trusting that the seeds you plant will bear fruit in due time. Consider how you can embody God First Living in your daily actions, serving as a beacon of faith for those around you. [38:35]
"And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." (Deuteronomy 6:6-7, ESV)
Reflection: What is one specific way you can model God First Living to those you influence today?
Quotes
"All of us in this room carry influence with somebody else. And one of the best ways to see the power of this, not just in parenting, is to look at great coaches. And maybe you've heard the story before of the high school basketball coach. His name was Clifton Pop Herring." [00:10:26] (18 seconds)
"Coach Herring took the time and kept telling him about how to overcome failure, stay determined, and believe in oneself. And that sophomore that got cut from the basketball team that Coach Herring spoke life into was Michael Jordan, who obviously went on to become one of, if not the greatest basketball player of all time." [00:11:06] (20 seconds)
"Jesus echoes this, though, when he tells a story about building on the right foundation. If you read the gospels, it says, if you build on shifting sand when the storms of life come, because they are coming, all of us are going to walk through multiple storms in life. If we've built on the wrong thing, we will not last." [00:13:09] (18 seconds)
"Train up a child in the way he should go. Even when he is old, he will not depart from it. Train up a child in the way he should go. Even when he is old, he will not depart from it. This is a popular verse. Maybe you've heard it before, but let's dive in phrase by phrase and unpack it." [00:14:25] (16 seconds)
"They all have these, these few things in common. First, they, the best parents, the best coaches, the best bosses, they always guide. They don't take over. They guide. They don't take over. They help the person do the job. They show them how, yes, they model it with their lives." [00:16:55] (17 seconds)
"Ask questions and then let your kid talk. Let them process out loud. And know you are not there in that moment to actually fix anything. You're there to just keep the conversation going. Just keep them talking. It doesn't have to be anything deep." [00:18:15] (19 seconds)
"Give your kids permission to fail, just not catastrophically. You are there if something terrible does start to happen, but they have a lot of power in their hands too." [00:24:40] (11 seconds)
"Wise correction will give your kids more wisdom. If not, you're going to have some spoiled kids. Another translation says of this same verse, it says a child left to himself brings shame to his mother." [00:25:28] (13 seconds)
"Train up a child in the way he should go. What is the way they should go here? What, what is that? That doesn't really mean what they do. This isn't about the career path they need to pursue. It's about how they do what they do in the way, the way of following Jesus." [00:28:26] (21 seconds)
"It's important that we shape them and we sharpen them. And it speaks of the way we show them what it means to love God, to follow Jesus, to serve others, to love, to forgive, to sacrifice. We show them what it means to live with integrity, with honor, with good character, what it means to love community, God's church, God's word." [00:29:41] (22 seconds)
"Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old, he will not depart from it. This is all about longevity, a foundation that has been built that we are going to trust the process with, playing the long game. The seeds we've planted in our kid's life will eventually take root." [00:34:37] (19 seconds)
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