Forgotten by Man, Remembered by God | Dr. Stephen Tan

After returning from a recent ministry trip to Europe, I was struck by the simple but profound ways that kindness and grace can leave a lasting mark on our lives. A chef, moved by a passing comment I made, prepared for me the best fried chicken I’ve ever tasted. Yet, to my embarrassment, I couldn’t remember his name when I recounted the story to my family. This forgetfulness is a mirror to our own hearts: how quickly we forget those who have blessed us, and how easily we overlook the good done to us—by God and by others.

This theme of being forgotten is woven throughout the story of Joseph in Genesis 40. Joseph, unjustly imprisoned, showed kindness and compassion to fellow prisoners, the chief butler and the chief baker. He not only served them but also noticed their sadness and offered encouragement by interpreting their troubling dreams, always pointing them to God as the true source of wisdom. Joseph’s only request was to be remembered when the butler was restored to his position. Yet, after receiving his freedom, the butler forgot Joseph entirely.

This is a painful reality: people often forget the good done for them. Whether out of busyness, self-interest, or simply moving on with life, gratitude fades and memories of kindness slip away. We see this in our families, workplaces, and even in our spiritual communities. When we don’t get what we want in the present, we tend to forget all the blessings and grace we’ve received in the past.

But there is hope. While people may forget, God never does. His memory is perfect. Scripture reminds us again and again that God remembers His promises, His people, and every act of faithfulness done in His name. Our desire for recognition and relevance is ultimately fulfilled not in the fleeting memories of others, but in the eternal remembrance of God. In Christ, we are significant, eternally relevant, and forever recognized. Even when the world forgets, God remembers—and that is enough.

Key Takeaways

• 1. Remember those who show us kindness It is easy to take for granted the people who have blessed us, especially when their acts of grace seem small or are in the past. Yet, true gratitude means intentionally remembering and honoring those who have shown us compassion and encouragement. This practice not only blesses others but also shapes our own hearts to be more like Christ, who never overlooks even the smallest act of love. [16:57]
• 2. Accept that people will often forget The reality is that most people, even those we have helped or loved deeply, may forget our kindness. This can be painful, but it is a part of living in a fallen world. Rather than growing bitter or resentful, we are called to serve and give without expectation of repayment, trusting that our worth is not determined by others’ memories or gratitude. [22:05]
• 3. God’s memory is perfect—He never forgets Unlike people, God’s remembrance is flawless. He sees every act of faithfulness, every moment of suffering, and every prayer. Our longing for significance and recognition finds its true fulfillment in Him. Even when we feel invisible or forgotten by the world, we can rest in the assurance that God remembers us, values us, and will never forget His promises. [31:48]
• 4. Our significance is found in Christ The desire to be remembered is rooted in our longing for relevance and recognition. In Christ, we are eternally significant—our names are written in the Book of Life, and our lives matter to God. This truth frees us from striving for human approval and anchors our identity in God’s unchanging love and remembrance. [37:25]

Youtube Chapters

• [00:00] - Welcome
• [00:40] - The Fried Chicken Blessing
• [01:54] - The Pain of Being Forgotten
• [03:10] - Joseph’s Story: Betrayal and Prison
• [04:57] - Joseph’s Kindness in Captivity
• [06:46] - Small Acts of Compassion
• [08:12] - Power of Encouragement
• [10:09] - God’s Revelation: Dreams and the Word
• [11:16] - Joseph’s Sensitivity and Compassion
• [13:06] - The Importance of Encouraging Words
• [15:43] - Joseph’s Simple Request: Remember Me
• [16:57] - Principle 1: Remember Kindness
• [22:05] - Principle 2: People Will Forget
• [31:48] - Principle 3: God Remembers
• [37:25] - Our Significance in Christ
• [39:47] - The Gift of Being Remembered
• [41:22] - Living in God’s Perfect Memory

Bible Reading

Genesis 40:1-23 (NKJV) — 1 It came to pass after these things that the butler and the baker of the king of Egypt offended their lord, the king of Egypt.
2 And Pharaoh was angry with his two officers, the chief butler and the chief baker.
3 So he put them in custody in the house of the captain of the guard, in the prison, the place where Joseph was confined.
4 And the captain of the guard charged Joseph with them, and he served them; so they were in custody for a while.
5 Then the butler and the baker of the king of Egypt, who were confined in the prison, had a dream, both of them, each man’s dream in one night and each man’s dream with its own interpretation.
6 And Joseph came in to them in the morning and looked at them, and saw that they were sad.
7 So he asked Pharaoh’s officers who were with him in the custody of his lord’s house, saying, “Why do you look so sad today?”
8 And they said to him, “We each have had a dream, and there is no interpreter of it.”
So Joseph said to them, “Do not interpretations belong to God? Tell them to me, please.”
9 Then the chief butler told his dream to Joseph, and said to him, “Behold, in my dream a vine was before me,
10 and in the vine were three branches; it was as though it budded, its blossoms shot forth, and its clusters brought forth ripe grapes.
11 Then Pharaoh’s cup was in my hand; and I took the grapes and pressed them into Pharaoh’s cup, and placed the cup in Pharaoh’s hand.”
12 And Joseph said to him, “This is the interpretation of it: The three branches are three days.
13 Now within three days Pharaoh will lift up your head and restore you to your place, and you will put Pharaoh’s cup in his hand according to the former manner, when you were his butler.
14 But remember me when it is well with you, and please show kindness to me; make mention of me to Pharaoh, and get me out of this house.
15 For indeed I was stolen away from the land of the Hebrews; and also I have done nothing here that they should put me into the dungeon.”
16 When the chief baker saw that the interpretation was good, he said to Joseph, “I also was in my dream, and there were three white baskets on my head.
17 In the uppermost basket were all kinds of baked goods for Pharaoh, and the birds ate them out of the basket on my head.”
18 So Joseph answered and said, “This is the interpretation of it: The three baskets are three days.
19 Within three days Pharaoh will lift off your head from you and hang you on a tree; and the birds will eat your flesh from you.”
20 Now it came to pass on the third day, which was Pharaoh’s birthday, that he made a feast for all his servants; and he lifted up the head of the chief butler and of the chief baker among his servants.
21 Then he restored the chief butler to his butlership again, and he placed the cup in Pharaoh’s hand.
22 But he hanged the chief baker, as Joseph had interpreted to them.
23 Yet the chief butler did not remember Joseph, but forgot him.

Observation Questions

1. What specific acts of kindness and compassion did Joseph show to the chief butler and chief baker while in prison? ([04:57])
2. How did Joseph respond when he noticed the butler and baker were sad? What does this reveal about his character? ([06:46])
3. What was Joseph’s one request to the chief butler after interpreting his dream? ([16:18])
4. According to verse 23, what did the chief butler do after being restored to his position? How might this have affected Joseph? ([19:26])

Interpretation Questions

1. Why do you think Joseph was so intentional about serving and encouraging others, even while he was suffering himself? ([04:57])
2. The butler forgot Joseph after being restored. What does this reveal about human nature and our tendency to forget those who have helped us? ([22:05])
3. The sermon mentions that people often forget the good done for them, especially when they are focused on their own needs or have moved on. How does this tendency show up in our own lives, families, or churches? ([24:04])
4. The sermon says that while people may forget, God never does. How does knowing that God remembers every act of faithfulness change the way we serve or endure being forgotten? ([31:48])

Application Questions

1. The pastor shared a story about being blessed by a chef’s kindness, but then forgetting his name. Can you think of someone who has shown you kindness or encouragement in the past that you may have forgotten or taken for granted? What could you do this week to intentionally remember and honor them? ([01:54])
2. Joseph served and encouraged others even when he was in a difficult place himself. Is there someone in your life right now who needs encouragement or a small act of kindness from you, even if you feel overlooked or tired? What could that look like? ([06:46])
3. The sermon says we should accept that people will often forget the good we do for them. Have you ever felt hurt or disappointed when someone forgot your kindness or help? How did you respond, and how could you respond differently in the future? ([22:05])
4. The pastor mentioned that our desire to be remembered is often about wanting recognition and relevance. In what areas of your life do you find yourself seeking recognition from others? How does the truth that God remembers and values you help you with this struggle? ([33:31])
5. When was the last time you felt forgotten or unappreciated by others? How did that experience affect your relationship with God? Did it make you doubt His care, or did it draw you closer to Him? ([31:48])
6. The sermon encourages us to serve and give without expecting repayment or recognition. What is one practical way you can serve someone this week, knowing that God sees and remembers, even if no one else does? ([36:12])
7. The pastor said, “Let us not be people who so easily forget.” What is one habit or practice you could start to help you remember and give thanks for the kindness of God and others in your life? ([41:47])