Finding Hope in Disappointment: The Resurrection Journey
Summary
Growing up surrounded by church and faith, it’s easy to assume we know Jesus well. Yet, many of us carry silent disappointments—prayers that seemed unanswered, moments when God felt distant, and seasons where our faith became more of a coping mechanism than a source of life. Like Martha and Mary, we may know all the right things to say about Jesus, but our hearts can still ache with confusion and unmet expectations. The story of Lazarus in John 11 invites us to confront these tensions honestly. Martha and Mary both loved Jesus deeply, yet when their brother died, they each processed their pain differently—Martha with words, Mary with silence and distance. Both responses were met with compassion by Jesus, who didn’t rebuke their disappointment but instead invited them to a deeper understanding of who He is.
Jesus’ delay in coming to Lazarus wasn’t a lack of love or power; it was an opportunity to reveal Himself as the resurrection and the life. He challenged Martha not just to recite what she knew, but to truly believe it. There’s a profound difference between resuscitation—a temporary fix we might achieve through effort or circumstance—and resurrection, which only God can bring about. Sometimes, God allows things to die in our lives not to punish us, but to make room for something entirely new, something that only He can resurrect. Our tendency is to want God to fix what’s broken, but Jesus wants to transform us at the core, to bring life where there was only death.
This journey requires honesty. Jesus doesn’t want us to hide behind spiritual language or pretend we’re not hurting. He invites us to bring our disappointment, our confusion, and our pain directly to Him. The lesson isn’t always learned in the comfort of the living room, but sometimes in the darkness of the tomb. In those places, Jesus asks, “Do you believe this?”—not just with your words, but with your heart. Resurrection is not just what Jesus does; it’s who He is. When we trust Him with our dead places, we discover that His timing, though mysterious, is always aimed at revealing His glory and drawing us into deeper life.
Key Takeaways
- Disappointment with God is not a sign of weak faith, but an invitation to deeper honesty. Like Martha and Mary, it’s possible to love Jesus and still feel let down by His timing or response. The healthiest response is not to avoid Him, but to bring our raw emotions and questions directly to Him, trusting that He can handle our pain and confusion. [13:18]
- There is a difference between knowing about Jesus and truly believing Him. Martha could recite the right answers, but Jesus pressed her to move from head knowledge to heart-level trust. Faith is not just about saying the right things; it’s about allowing God’s truth to transform our perspective, especially when circumstances contradict what we hoped for. [23:37]
- Sometimes God allows things to die in our lives so that He can resurrect something new. Resuscitation is a temporary fix that we might attribute to our own efforts, but resurrection is a miracle only God can perform. When God lets a dream, relationship, or opportunity die, it’s often because He wants to bring forth something greater that points unmistakably to His power and love. [34:47]
- The way we process pain and disappointment is unique, but Jesus meets us in both our activity and our paralysis. Whether we run to Him with words or withdraw in silence, He welcomes us as we are. The only misstep is to avoid Him altogether; true healing begins when we bring our brokenness into His presence. [32:16]
- Resurrection is not just an event, but a person—Jesus Himself. Our hope is not merely in what God can do for us, but in who He is. When we anchor our faith in the character of Christ rather than the outcome we desire, we find a life that endures beyond disappointment and loss, rooted in the One who is the resurrection and the life. [31:06]
Youtube Chapters
[00:00] - Welcome
[02:47] - Opening Prayer
[03:09] - Early Experiences with Faith
[04:27] - Wrestling with Unanswered Prayers
[06:02] - Disappointment and Misconceptions about Jesus
[07:00] - Introducing the Story of Lazarus
[09:26] - Jewish Mourning and Death Practices
[12:14] - Jesus’ Delayed Arrival
[13:05] - Martha’s Honest Confrontation
[16:43] - Mary and Martha’s Different Responses
[19:09] - When Disappointment Creates Distance
[21:05] - Speaking Faith but Feeling Distant
[23:07] - Jesus’ Challenge: Do You Believe?
[26:37] - Moving Away from the Mourners
[28:21] - Trusting God When Experience Contradicts His Word
[31:06] - Resurrection vs. Resuscitation
[35:36] - When God Lets Things Die
[37:19] - Jesus’ Compassion in Our Pain
Study Guide
Small Group Bible Study Guide: “Do You Believe This?”
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### Bible Reading
John 11:1-44
(The story of Lazarus, Martha, and Mary)
Luke 10:38-42
(Mary and Martha’s first encounter with Jesus)
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### Observation Questions
1. When Jesus heard that Lazarus was sick, what did He do, and how did His actions differ from what Martha and Mary expected? (John 11:5-6) [07:48]
2. How did Martha and Mary each respond when Jesus finally arrived after Lazarus had died? What were their words and actions? (John 11:20-32) [16:12]
3. What did Jesus say about Himself to Martha, and what question did He ask her in response to her grief? (John 11:25-26) [23:07]
4. In Luke 10, how did Mary and Martha interact with Jesus differently during His earlier visit to their home? (Luke 10:38-42) [16:54]
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### Interpretation Questions
1. Why do you think Jesus delayed coming to see Lazarus, even though He loved Martha, Mary, and Lazarus? What does this reveal about His character and priorities? [07:48]
2. The sermon points out that Martha knew the “right answers” about Jesus but still struggled to believe in her heart. What is the difference between knowing about Jesus and truly believing Him? [23:37]
3. Both Martha and Mary processed their pain differently—one with words, one with silence. What does Jesus’ response to each of them teach us about how He meets us in our disappointment? [32:16]
4. The sermon contrasts “resuscitation” (a temporary fix) with “resurrection” (a complete transformation only God can do). Why is this distinction important for our faith? [34:47]
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### Application Questions
1. The sermon says disappointment with God is not a sign of weak faith, but an invitation to deeper honesty. Can you think of a time when you felt disappointed with God? How did you respond—did you bring it to Him, or did you distance yourself? What would it look like to be more honest with God about your pain? [13:18]
2. Martha could recite the right answers, but Jesus challenged her to truly believe. Are there areas in your life where you “know” the right things about God but struggle to trust Him in your heart? What is one step you could take to move from head knowledge to heart-level trust? [23:37]
3. The sermon suggests that sometimes God allows things to “die” in our lives so He can resurrect something new. Is there a dream, relationship, or hope in your life that feels dead right now? How might God want to bring new life in that area, and what would it look like to trust Him with it? [34:47]
4. When you experience pain or disappointment, do you tend to run to God with words (like Martha), withdraw in silence (like Mary), or avoid Him altogether? What would it look like for you to bring your real emotions to Jesus this week? [32:16]
5. The sermon says, “Resurrection is not just an event, but a person—Jesus Himself.” How does anchoring your hope in who Jesus is (rather than just what He can do for you) change the way you face disappointment or loss? [31:06]
6. The story of Lazarus shows that Jesus’ timing is often different from ours, but always aimed at revealing His glory. Is there a situation in your life where you are struggling with God’s timing? How can you practice trusting His timing this week? [07:48]
7. The only misstep, according to the sermon, is to avoid Jesus altogether. What practical step can you take this week to bring your brokenness into His presence, even if you don’t have the words? [32:16]
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Closing Prayer Suggestion:
Invite group members to pray honestly, bringing any disappointments, confusion, or “dead places” in their lives to Jesus, asking Him to meet them with compassion and resurrection power.
Devotional
Day 1: Jesus Is the Resurrection and the Life
When facing disappointment and loss, it is easy to see Jesus only as someone who helps us get to heaven, but He declares Himself to be the resurrection and the life—meaning that true life, hope, and restoration are found in Him, not just in what He does for us, but in who He is right now. Even when our prayers seem unanswered and our dreams feel dead, Jesus invites us to trust that He is present and powerful in the midst of our pain, offering a life that goes beyond our expectations and circumstances. [23:07]
John 11:25-26 (ESV)
Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?”
Reflection: What is one area of your life that feels hopeless or “dead” right now, and how might you invite Jesus to reveal Himself as resurrection and life in that place today?
Day 2: Honest Disappointment and Faith Can Coexist
Martha and Mary both experienced deep disappointment when Jesus did not show up as they expected, yet they brought their honest pain and questions directly to Him—showing that God welcomes our raw emotions and doubts, and desires our authenticity more than our religious language or performance. Rather than hiding or suppressing your disappointment, you are invited to bring it to Jesus, trusting that He can handle your honesty and meet you in your pain. [13:05]
John 11:21
Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”
Reflection: What disappointment or unanswered prayer have you been carrying? Can you take a moment today to honestly tell Jesus how you feel, without holding anything back?
Day 3: When Faith Becomes a Coping Mechanism
It is possible to say all the right things and use “Christian language” to cope with pain, while still feeling distant from God in your heart; Jesus calls us to move beyond surface-level faith and invites us to truly believe and trust Him, even when our experiences don’t match our expectations. He wants us to be real with Him, not just recite what we know, but to let our hearts engage with who He is, especially in seasons of loss or confusion. [22:06]
John 11:23-27
Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” Martha said to him, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day.” Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?” She said to him, “Yes, Lord; I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who is coming into the world.”
Reflection: Are there areas where you are saying the right things about God but not truly believing them in your heart? What would it look like to move from coping to genuine trust today?
Day 4: Resurrection Is Greater Than Resuscitation
Sometimes we want God to simply fix or resuscitate what is broken in our lives, but Jesus offers something far greater—resurrection, which means bringing new life out of what was truly dead and beyond human help; this requires letting go of our own efforts and trusting that God’s power is made perfect in our weakness and surrender. When we allow things to die that need to die, we make space for God to do what only He can do, so that He alone gets the glory for the new life He brings. [34:14]
Romans 6:4 (ESV)
We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life.
Reflection: Is there something in your life you keep trying to “fix” on your own that God may be asking you to let go of so He can bring true resurrection? What would it look like to surrender that to Him today?
Day 5: Processing Pain with Jesus, Not Apart from Him
Mary and Martha processed their pain differently—one ran to Jesus, the other withdrew—yet Jesus loved and accepted them both, showing that there is no single “right” way to grieve or struggle, except to avoid Jesus altogether; He invites you to bring your pain, confusion, and even anger to Him, trusting that He can handle it and desires to meet you in your most vulnerable moments. The only wrong way to process pain is to keep your distance from the One who cares for you most. [32:16]
Psalm 34:18 (ESV)
The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
Reflection: How do you typically respond when you are hurt or disappointed—do you run to Jesus or withdraw from Him? What is one step you can take today to bring your pain honestly to Him?
Quotes
I grew up uh with a a very religious uh grandmother and mother and they were very insistent of me being around Jesus. I was a drug baby. I got drugged to church on Sunday mornings, Wednesday nights, Friday nights, revival days. Uh, I feel like I was born and raised in church, but something happened to me if I'm honest as as I was growing up. [00:03:04]
I remember praying for my dad to get out of prison. He he stayed in prison so long. I stopped praying. By the time he got out, it had been 33 years. I had I I had stopped praying for him to get out. And and and I don't know about you, but I just hit a point where I feel like I felt like it wasn't that I didn't believe in Jesus. [00:04:20]
If I just need Jesus to get to heaven, then really I should be able to do whatever I want to do on earth. And then right before I die, when I'm laying there, when I'm old, like in my 40s or 50s or something, you know what I mean? JK, anybody ever thought like that? [00:04:41]
Anybody ever thought like, man, it's not that I know Jesus is the way to heaven, but it seems like it sucks on earth and and and it feels like everybody else is just having fun doing what they want to do, and they don't even follow Jesus. So why should I why should I give up my life to Jesus instead of just waiting till I die? [00:04:56]
And that misconception and that misunderstanding of Jesus I dealt with for years. And and and it robbed me of actually living because then I started to chase things I thought would give me life because I didn't recognize that I had access to life himself. [00:05:19]
But I found it interesting that I wasn't alone because Martha, Mary, Lazarus, all of them kind of went through this experience to where the Jesus they were expecting and believing for did not show up when or where they wanted him to show up. [00:05:47]
But I want to do the same thing that Jesus did to Martha. If you would allow me for the next 30 plus minutes, I want to reintroduce you to Jesus because Jesus had to reintroduce himself to someone who already knew him. And he said, "Listen, I am the resurrection and the life." [00:06:22]
However, I would argue that in America, we are so desensitized to death that we do what my therapist says I do or did is something traumatic happens and we just move on to the next thing and be like, got to just got to keep it moving to where we don't even realize all the death and the trauma that we've experienced because we just on to the next play, on to the next day. [00:11:23]
But she says,"Lord, if you had if only you had been here, my brother would not have died." What is she really saying? She's saying, "God, it's not fair." She's upset, not because Lazarus was sick, not because Lazarus was dead. She was upset because she could have dealt with sickness and death on her own. She didn't need to know Jesus for that. [00:12:51]
What was the point of being a friend to Jesus if Jesus is not going to help you in your biggest time of need? What was the point of welcoming Jesus into her home if Jesus was going to be absent when he needed she needed him the most? She's saying, "This isn't fair. I trusted you. I believed in you. I've been ostracized for my community from you." [00:14:23]
We all have a moment where we said, "Hey, I prayed. I went to church. I I I I put my money in the bin when it came around. I I did all the Christian things. I worshiped. I like I I showed up. I showed up for Jesus. Why didn't Jesus show up for me?" If you had only been here, I hope you're more real online than they are at 10:00 in the Legacy Church in Chandler. [00:15:26]
Have you ever found yourself going from listening to Cale Love and Maverick City and worship music and you're like, "I love you, God." And you want to be in church and you want to read your Bible and you want to learn and you want to grow and you just I just I just I just love Jesus. [00:19:16]
But the moment that Jesus doesn't answer the prayer that you prayed, the moment that Jesus doesn't fix the relationship that was broken, the moment that Jesus doesn't get you out of the debt that you probably got yourself into, but that's a different conversation. The moment that Jesus does not show up to save your Lazarus, all of a sudden Mary goes from being the prototype for a worship leader at church to becoming the first person in scripture we see to be dechurched because she was hurt by the church. [00:19:33]
And so what you're subconsciously telling yourself and verbally telling everyone else is that God is giving me my backup plan and I'm having to settle for what God wants because he didn't give me what I really wanted. That's why Jesus asked her, "Do you really believe this? Because I don't need you being fake with me, Martha. [00:24:03]
Because often times with following Jesus, there's a difference between what we know and what we actually believe. There's a disconnect between, yeah, I know God has a plan and all things work together for the good of those who love God and accord according to his purpose, but you're still crying over the breakup. [00:23:37]
And how many of us do that where we just get so good at speaking life, but there's a dead tone because at the end of the day, your faith and your hope and your everything was resting on God, I I hey, I trust you. I believe you. I just need you to give me that position. [00:25:13]
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