Finding God in Grief: A Journey of Healing
Summary
### Summary
Today, we explored the profound and often misunderstood topic of grief and its place in our spiritual journey. Grief, though painful, can be a conduit for deeper intimacy with God. I shared personal stories of loss and disappointment, emphasizing that it's okay to bring our brokenness to God. We often feel pressured to present only the bright and shiny parts of our lives, but God invites us to bring everything to Him, including our sadness and grief.
We looked at the story of Elijah, who, despite witnessing a monumental miracle, found himself in a pit of despair. God didn't chastise him but provided rest and sustenance, showing His compassion and understanding. This illustrates that God is not disappointed in our sadness; instead, He meets us in our brokenness with grace and compassion.
We also discussed the importance of orthodoxy (right beliefs), orthopraxy (right actions), and orthopathy (right feelings). Often, we struggle to align our emotions with our beliefs, but God wants us to bring our whole selves to Him, including our feelings. Authenticity in our walk with God narrows the gap between what we profess and how we live, making our faith more genuine and relatable to others.
Finally, we touched on the significance of community. Grieving in isolation can be detrimental, but sharing our burdens with others can lead to healing and revival. We are called to support one another, to be the hands and feet of Jesus, especially in times of sorrow.
### Key Takeaways
1. Grief as a Pathway to Intimacy with God: Grief, though painful, can deepen our relationship with God. It strips away our self-reliance and brings us to a place of complete dependence on Him. In our brokenness, we often find a clearer view of God's presence and compassion. [01:29]
2. God's Compassion in Our Despair: The story of Elijah shows that God meets us in our lowest moments with compassion, not condemnation. After Elijah's great victory, he fell into despair, but God provided rest and sustenance, demonstrating His understanding and care for our human frailty. [30:22]
3. Authenticity in Faith: Aligning our beliefs, actions, and feelings (orthodoxy, orthopraxy, and orthopathy) is crucial for a genuine faith. God invites us to bring our whole selves to Him, including our sadness and grief. Authenticity narrows the gap between what we profess and how we live, making our faith more relatable and impactful. [20:13]
4. The Role of Community in Healing: Grieving in isolation can be detrimental. Sharing our burdens with others can lead to healing and revival. We are called to support one another, to be the hands and feet of Jesus, especially in times of sorrow. [48:03]
5. Gratitude in Grief: Choosing to be grateful in our grief can transform our perspective. Even when we don't understand our circumstances, trusting that God will use our pain for good can lead to personal revival and deeper dependence on Him. [49:37]
### YouTube Chapters
[0:00] - Welcome
[01:29] - Introduction to Grief
[03:07] - Personal Story of Loss
[05:54] - The Fourth of July Incident
[07:07] - The Fall and the Dog
[09:48] - The Impact of Grief
[11:21] - Misconceptions About Faith and Sadness
[12:34] - God's Invitation to Bring Everything
[14:30] - Personal Story of Recent Loss
[15:49] - Biblical Examples of Grief
[17:20] - Revival Often Follows Pits
[18:48] - Orthodoxy, Orthopraxy, and Orthopathy
[20:13] - Aligning Beliefs, Actions, and Feelings
[21:38] - Personal Story of Injury
[22:58] - The Importance of Alignment
[24:27] - The Struggle with Authenticity
[26:02] - Atonement and Daily Dependence
[27:24] - The Story of Elijah
[30:22] - The Danger of Isolation
[32:15] - God's Compassionate Response
[33:46] - Revival Presupposes a Pit
[35:19] - Psalm 22 and Honest Lament
[37:05] - Formal vs. Functional Theology
[38:45] - The Gap Between Belief and Practice
[40:18] - Personal Story of Struggle
[41:44] - Childhood Experience of Grief
[44:40] - The Importance of Presence
[46:32] - Invitation to Be Honest About Grief
[48:03] - Community Support and Prayer
[49:37] - Choosing Gratitude in Grief
[51:05] - Closing Prayer and Reflection
Study Guide
### Bible Reading
1. 1 Kings 19:1-8 (ESV)
> "Ahab told Jezebel all that Elijah had done, and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. Then Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying, 'So may the gods do to me and more also, if I do not make your life as the life of one of them by this time tomorrow.' Then he was afraid, and he arose and ran for his life and came to Beersheba, which belongs to Judah, and left his servant there. But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness and came and sat down under a broom tree. And he asked that he might die, saying, 'It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my fathers.' And he lay down and slept under a broom tree. And behold, an angel touched him and said to him, 'Arise and eat.' And he looked, and behold, there was at his head a cake baked on hot stones and a jar of water. And he ate and drank and lay down again. And the angel of the Lord came again a second time and touched him and said, 'Arise and eat, for the journey is too great for you.' And he arose and ate and drank, and went in the strength of that food forty days and forty nights to Horeb, the mount of God."
2. Psalm 22:1-2, 14-18 (ESV)
> "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? O my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer, and by night, but I find no rest... I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint; my heart is like wax; it is melted within my breast; my strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to my jaws; you lay me in the dust of death. For dogs encompass me; a company of evildoers encircles me; they have pierced my hands and feet—I can count all my bones—they stare and gloat over me; they divide my garments among them, and for my clothing they cast lots."
### Observation Questions
1. What was Elijah's emotional state after his victory over the prophets of Baal, and how did God respond to him? ([30:22])
2. In Psalm 22, what are some of the expressions of grief and despair that David uses to describe his situation?
3. How does the sermon describe the role of community in dealing with grief and sorrow? ([48:03])
4. What are the three aspects of faith mentioned in the sermon, and how are they defined? ([18:48])
### Interpretation Questions
1. How does Elijah's experience under the broom tree illustrate God's compassion in our moments of despair? ([30:22])
2. What does Psalm 22 teach us about expressing our deepest feelings of abandonment and sorrow to God?
3. How can aligning our beliefs, actions, and feelings (orthodoxy, orthopraxy, and orthopathy) lead to a more authentic faith? ([20:13])
4. Why is it important to share our burdens with others rather than grieving in isolation, according to the sermon? ([48:03])
### Application Questions
1. Reflect on a time when you felt deep grief or sorrow. How did you respond to God during that time? Did you feel His presence and compassion? ([30:22])
2. Psalm 22 shows David's raw and honest lament. How can you incorporate this kind of honesty in your prayers and relationship with God?
3. The sermon emphasizes the importance of community in healing. Do you have a support system in place for times of grief? If not, what steps can you take to build one? ([48:03])
4. How can you practice aligning your beliefs, actions, and feelings in your daily walk with God? Are there specific areas where you struggle with authenticity? ([20:13])
5. The sermon mentioned the concept of gratitude in grief. Can you think of a situation where you found it difficult to be grateful? How might choosing gratitude change your perspective? ([49:37])
6. Have you ever felt pressured to present only the "bright and shiny" parts of your life to others or to God? How can you start being more authentic about your struggles? ([12:34])
7. What practical steps can you take this week to support someone else who might be grieving or going through a difficult time? ([48:03])
Devotional
Day 1: Grief as a Pathway to Intimacy with God
Grief, though deeply painful, can serve as a profound pathway to deeper intimacy with God. When we experience loss and disappointment, it strips away our self-reliance and brings us to a place of complete dependence on Him. In our brokenness, we often find a clearer view of God's presence and compassion. It's in these moments of vulnerability that we can experience God's love and comfort in a more profound way.
God invites us to bring our whole selves to Him, including our sadness and grief. He doesn't expect us to present only the bright and shiny parts of our lives. Instead, He wants us to come to Him with our brokenness, knowing that He will meet us with grace and compassion. This openness and honesty in our relationship with God can lead to a deeper, more intimate connection with Him. [01:29]
Psalm 34:18 (ESV): "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit."
Reflection: Think of a recent experience of grief or disappointment. How can you bring this brokenness to God today and allow Him to meet you in your pain?
Day 2: God's Compassion in Our Despair
The story of Elijah illustrates that God meets us in our lowest moments with compassion, not condemnation. After Elijah's great victory, he fell into a pit of despair. Instead of chastising him, God provided rest and sustenance, demonstrating His understanding and care for our human frailty. This story reminds us that God is not disappointed in our sadness; instead, He meets us with grace and compassion.
God's response to Elijah's despair shows us that He understands our struggles and is compassionate towards us. He doesn't expect us to be strong all the time. Instead, He invites us to rest in His presence and receive His care. This compassionate response from God can be a source of great comfort and encouragement in our times of despair. [30:22]
1 Kings 19:5-6 (ESV): "And he lay down and slept under a broom tree. And behold, an angel touched him and said to him, 'Arise and eat.' And he looked, and behold, there was at his head a cake baked on hot stones and a jar of water. And he ate and drank and lay down again."
Reflection: Reflect on a time when you felt despair. How did you experience God's compassion and care during that time? How can you seek His rest and sustenance today?
Day 3: Authenticity in Faith
Aligning our beliefs, actions, and feelings (orthodoxy, orthopraxy, and orthopathy) is crucial for a genuine faith. God invites us to bring our whole selves to Him, including our sadness and grief. Authenticity in our walk with God narrows the gap between what we profess and how we live, making our faith more relatable and impactful to others.
Often, we struggle to align our emotions with our beliefs, but God wants us to be authentic in our relationship with Him. This means being honest about our feelings and allowing God to work in our hearts. When we live authentically, our faith becomes more genuine and relatable to others, and we can have a greater impact on those around us. [20:13]
Psalm 139:23-24 (ESV): "Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!"
Reflection: Are there areas in your life where you struggle to align your emotions with your beliefs? How can you bring these areas to God and seek His help in living authentically?
Day 4: The Role of Community in Healing
Grieving in isolation can be detrimental, but sharing our burdens with others can lead to healing and revival. We are called to support one another, to be the hands and feet of Jesus, especially in times of sorrow. Community plays a vital role in our healing process, providing us with the support and encouragement we need to navigate through our grief.
When we share our burdens with others, we allow them to come alongside us and offer their support. This can lead to a sense of healing and revival as we experience the love and care of our community. Being part of a supportive community can help us feel less alone in our grief and provide us with the strength to move forward. [48:03]
Galatians 6:2 (ESV): "Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."
Reflection: Think of someone in your community who may be grieving. How can you reach out to them and offer your support today?
Day 5: Gratitude in Grief
Choosing to be grateful in our grief can transform our perspective. Even when we don't understand our circumstances, trusting that God will use our pain for good can lead to personal revival and deeper dependence on Him. Gratitude in the midst of grief can help us see God's hand at work and find hope in His promises.
Gratitude doesn't mean ignoring our pain or pretending everything is okay. Instead, it means recognizing God's presence and goodness even in the midst of our struggles. By choosing to be grateful, we can shift our focus from our pain to God's faithfulness, allowing us to experience His peace and comfort. [49:37]
1 Thessalonians 5:18 (ESV): "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
Reflection: In what ways can you choose to be grateful in your current circumstances? How can this attitude of gratitude transform your perspective and deepen your dependence on God?
Quotes
### Quotes for Outreach
1. "Sometimes there's that gap between I trust in God, and then you're waiting on an answer, waiting on an answer, waiting on an answer. C.S. Lewis says, sometimes we don't get the answer that we're so desperate for. We get more of a no answer. He said, but it's not uncompassionate. It's as if God is saying, peace, child. You don't understand this because we see through the lens, you know, kind of blurry." [01:29] (25 seconds)
2. "I used to never talk about hard things like that. I used to say when I was grieving, when I lost somebody I loved, I never talked about the gap between I trust in God and he answers because I grew up in a stream of the church where it was just tacitly endorsed that you always were a happy face." [11:21] (21 seconds)
3. "Our God is so kind that never one time, never one time in this love story we call the Bible does he say, I want you to stuff the sad parts and only bring the bright and shiny to me. Never, ever. People do that. But our creator redeemer has never said, I only want the positivity in you. He never says that. He says, bring me everything. Bring me everything." [12:34] (28 seconds)
4. "Jesus didn't punk us. He didn't say everything's going to be perfect here. He said, in this world, you will have trouble. He said, take heart, take heart, take heart. I've overcome the world." [17:20] (11 seconds)
5. "To be sad isn't bad as a believer. There's nothing illegitimate about being sad. Where you go with that sorrow or that grief or that disappointment or that angst or that anxiety, that's where we get illegitimate. But to have feelings or the pathy, that's supposed to be congruent." [21:38] (22 seconds)
### Quotes for Members
1. "I thought I'm not allowed to do that. It'll be a bad witness. It'll hurt God's reputation. I used to beat myself up internally and just say, if you could just memorize a few more verses, if you could, just muster up a little more faith, you'd be a more effective evangelist. Lisa, you can't say you're having a hard day. Somehow that negates the whole fact that he's a perfect God, that he's a good God, that he never leaves us and he never forsakes us." [11:21] (27 seconds)
2. "I just ached in isolation because I swallowed the lie that God is disappointed in us if we're sad. I thought sad was bad. Y'all, it took me a long, long, long time to realize that our God is so kind that never one time, never one time in this love story we call the Bible does he say, I want you to stuff the sad parts and only bring the bright and shiny to me. Never, ever." [12:34] (30 seconds)
3. "Revival presupposes a pit. Revival presupposes a pit. Revival presupposes a pit. Revival presupposes a pit. A time when we get stripped of our self-reliance. Weakness presupposes strength, presupposes weakness. Why is it that we always try to hide that? It's because we're trying to be the hero. We aren't the hero. We aren't the answer. We aren't the good news. Jesus is. We're conduits, y'all. We are conduits." [33:46] (27 seconds)
4. "Honest heartbreak when we bring it to the Lord actually narrows the gap between what we say we believe and how we respond to the world around us. Yeah, we need more Christians who say, let me tell you about the God who carried me when I couldn't carry the weight of my own life. That's not being a Debbie Downer. That's telling the world around us that he actually is who he says he is." [38:45] (27 seconds)
5. "The presence of God during difficult seasons becomes not just the presence of God, but the presence cornerstone of our faith. Because then when we sing, I trust in God. And he heard. And he answered. It doesn't matter if there's a gap in between. Because even when there's no words, we recognize presence." [44:40] (38 seconds)