Finding Contentment: Overcoming the Trap of Coveting
Summary
### Summary
Today, we concluded our series on the Ten Commandments by focusing on the final commandment: "You shall not covet." The title of the message was "The Day You Stopped Ordering Happy Meals," inspired by the idea that at some point, we all stop desiring the simple joys of childhood and start longing for what others have. This longing, or coveting, can rob us of our happiness and contentment.
We explored how coveting begins with comparison. Just like children comparing their Happy Meal toys, we as adults often compare our lives, possessions, and relationships to others, leading to dissatisfaction and envy. This comparison corrupts our view of God, corrodes our self-image, and can lead us to compromise our values and relationships.
We looked at the story of King David and Bathsheba as a powerful example of how coveting can lead to devastating consequences. David, who had everything, still desired what was not his and ended up committing adultery and murder. This story serves as a cautionary tale about the dangers of letting covetous thoughts take root in our hearts.
To combat coveting, we need to cultivate contentment, accountability, gratitude, self-awareness, and trust in God's plan. Contentment is an intentional discipline, not something we fall into. Accountability helps us stay grounded and supported. Gratitude shifts our focus from what we lack to what we have. Understanding our mindset helps us address underlying issues that fuel our covetous thoughts. Finally, embracing God's plan reminds us that He is writing a unique and beautiful story with our lives, and we should not compare our journey to others.
### Key Takeaways
1. Comparison Corrupts Our View of God: When we compare ourselves to others, we question God's unique design for us. This corrupts our view of God and His creation, leading us to doubt His goodness and wisdom. We must remember that we are made in God's image, and comparing ourselves to others is questioning the Creator's work. [09:05]
2. Coveting Corrodes Our Self-Image: Coveting makes us focus on what we lack, creating a sense of inadequacy. This corrodes our self-image and leads us to believe we are not enough. We must combat this by valuing contentment and recognizing that we are uniquely made and loved by God. [09:50]
3. Accountability Anchors Us: Having accountability partners helps us stay grounded and supported. When we are open about our struggles and have people who spur us toward love and good deeds, we are less likely to fall into the trap of coveting. Community is essential for spiritual growth and contentment. [29:09]
4. Gratitude Transforms Our Perspective: Gratitude turns not enough into more than enough. When we focus on what we have and give thanks in all circumstances, we shift our mindset from scarcity to abundance. This helps us see God's blessings and provision in our lives, reducing the desire to covet what others have. [31:22]
5. Embrace God's Plan: Trusting in God's plan for our lives helps us avoid the pitfalls of coveting. God is writing a unique story with each of our lives, and His plan is always better than our own. Embracing His plan means recognizing that He is in control and that He knows what is best for us, even when it doesn't align with our desires. [35:12]
### YouTube Chapters
[0:00] - Welcome
[01:41] - Introduction to the Final Commandment
[02:30] - The Day You Stopped Ordering Happy Meals
[05:23] - The Unhappy Meal: The Danger of Comparison
[06:49] - Personal Struggles with Coveting
[09:05] - Comparison Corrupts Our View of God
[09:50] - Coveting Corrodes Our Self-Image
[10:46] - The Impact of Social Media on Coveting
[15:16] - Comparing Starting Lines
[16:42] - Understanding Coveting
[19:02] - King David's Story: A Cautionary Tale
[22:03] - The Dangers of Being Out of Position
[27:08] - Practical Steps to Combat Coveting
[29:09] - The Importance of Accountability
[31:22] - Living Gratefully
[33:23] - Understanding Your Mindset
[35:12] - Embracing God's Plan
[38:14] - Hope and Reconciliation Through Jesus
Study Guide
### Bible Reading
1. Exodus 20:17 - "You shall not covet your neighbor's house. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife, or his male or female servant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor."
2. 2 Samuel 11:2-4 - "One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, 'She is Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite.' Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her."
3. Philippians 4:11-12 - "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."
### Observation Questions
1. What does the tenth commandment in Exodus 20:17 instruct us not to do?
2. In 2 Samuel 11:2-4, what actions did King David take after seeing Bathsheba bathing? [24:26]
3. According to Philippians 4:11-12, what has Paul learned to be in any and every situation?
### Interpretation Questions
1. How does the act of coveting, as described in Exodus 20:17, affect our relationship with God and others?
2. What were the consequences of King David's covetous actions in 2 Samuel 11:2-4, and how did it impact his life and reign? [25:21]
3. How does Paul's teaching on contentment in Philippians 4:11-12 contrast with the concept of coveting?
### Application Questions
1. Reflect on a time when you found yourself comparing your life to someone else's. How did it affect your happiness and contentment? [05:23]
2. What practical steps can you take to cultivate contentment in your daily life, especially when you feel tempted to covet what others have? [27:49]
3. How can you incorporate gratitude into your daily routine to shift your focus from what you lack to what you have? [31:22]
4. Do you have accountability partners who help you stay grounded and supported? If not, how can you find or establish such relationships? [29:09]
5. In what ways can you embrace God's unique plan for your life, even when it doesn't align with your desires or expectations? [35:12]
6. How can you develop greater self-awareness to understand the underlying issues that fuel your covetous thoughts? [32:30]
7. Think of a specific area in your life where you struggle with coveting. What is one actionable step you can take this week to address this struggle? [06:49]
Devotional
Day 1: Comparison Corrupts Our View of God
When we compare ourselves to others, we often question God's unique design for us. This comparison can lead us to doubt God's goodness and wisdom, as we start to believe that He has shortchanged us in some way. By focusing on what others have, we lose sight of the fact that we are made in God's image and that He has a unique plan for each of us. This mindset not only corrupts our view of God but also diminishes our appreciation for His creation and His work in our lives.
To combat this, we must remember that comparing ourselves to others is essentially questioning the Creator's work. God has crafted each of us with a specific purpose and plan in mind. Embracing this truth helps us to trust in His wisdom and goodness, allowing us to find contentment in our own journey rather than longing for someone else's. [09:05]
Jeremiah 1:5 (ESV): "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations."
Reflection: In what areas of your life do you find yourself comparing to others? How can you shift your focus to appreciate God's unique design for you today?
Day 2: Coveting Corrodes Our Self-Image
Coveting makes us focus on what we lack, creating a sense of inadequacy. This constant focus on our deficiencies corrodes our self-image and leads us to believe that we are not enough. When we covet, we are essentially telling ourselves that we are incomplete without what others have, which can lead to feelings of envy and resentment.
To combat this, we need to value contentment and recognize that we are uniquely made and loved by God. By focusing on our own blessings and strengths, we can build a healthier self-image and find joy in who we are. Understanding that we are enough in God's eyes helps us to resist the urge to covet and instead embrace our own journey. [09:50]
Psalm 139:14 (ESV): "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well."
Reflection: What are some things you often find yourself coveting? How can you remind yourself of your unique worth and value in God's eyes today?
Day 3: Accountability Anchors Us
Having accountability partners helps us stay grounded and supported. When we are open about our struggles and have people who spur us toward love and good deeds, we are less likely to fall into the trap of coveting. Community is essential for spiritual growth and contentment, as it provides a support system that encourages us to stay true to our values and resist the temptation to compare ourselves to others.
Accountability partners can help us recognize when we are slipping into covetous thoughts and provide the encouragement we need to refocus on our own journey. By being part of a community that values honesty and support, we can find the strength to combat coveting and cultivate contentment in our lives. [29:09]
Hebrews 10:24-25 (ESV): "And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near."
Reflection: Who are the people in your life that you can turn to for accountability? How can you be more open about your struggles with them today?
Day 4: Gratitude Transforms Our Perspective
Gratitude turns not enough into more than enough. When we focus on what we have and give thanks in all circumstances, we shift our mindset from scarcity to abundance. This helps us see God's blessings and provision in our lives, reducing the desire to covet what others have. Gratitude is a powerful tool that can transform our perspective and help us find contentment in our own journey.
By practicing gratitude daily, we can train our minds to focus on the positives in our lives rather than what we lack. This shift in perspective allows us to appreciate God's blessings and recognize His provision, making it easier to resist the urge to covet. [31:22]
1 Thessalonians 5:18 (ESV): "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
Reflection: What are three things you are grateful for today? How can you make gratitude a daily practice to help combat coveting?
Day 5: Embrace God's Plan
Trusting in God's plan for our lives helps us avoid the pitfalls of coveting. God is writing a unique story with each of our lives, and His plan is always better than our own. Embracing His plan means recognizing that He is in control and that He knows what is best for us, even when it doesn't align with our desires. By trusting in God's plan, we can find peace and contentment in our own journey, rather than longing for what others have.
Understanding that God's plan is unique for each of us helps us to let go of comparisons and focus on our own path. By embracing His plan, we can find joy and fulfillment in the journey He has set before us, knowing that He is guiding us every step of the way. [35:12]
Proverbs 3:5-6 (ESV): "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths."
Reflection: In what areas of your life do you struggle to trust God's plan? How can you surrender these areas to Him and embrace His unique story for you today?
Quotes
### Quotes for outreach
1. "How many of you know that nothing can steal you of your happiness faster than comparison? When looking at what you have, and then looking at what someone else has, and saying, well, I don't like what I have. I want what they have. It's called coveting. All of a sudden, you go from happy to unhappy. But don't we all do this as adults?" [06:03] (19 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
2. "When we compare ourselves to others, we're always going to go from loving our life to coveting someone else's every single time. Why? Because someone's always going to have a higher paying job. Someone's always going to have a better marriage, better family, better body. Nothing will make you go from loving it to coveting. Then comparison. Why? Write this down. Because comparison corrupts the way you see God." [09:05] (29 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
3. "Gratitude turns not enough into more than enough. You start having some gratitude, you go, oh, you know what? I have everything I need. Man, I might not have all the things I want, but I got the ingredients, right? Oh, it might not be ready, but I got the thing. I got the recipe. I got the ingredients. If I just trust God, right, and I'm just grateful for what I have, it's gonna turn what I have into enough." [31:22] (27 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
4. "You begin to value contentment. You find accountability. You begin to live gratefully. And you begin to shift your mindset from I need more to I am enough. It's hard to feel like you're enough when the world says you need more. It's hard to feel like you're enough when you always feel inadequate. It's hard. It's hard. But you serve a God who validates you. He has never doubted your worth, not for one moment." [33:55] (33 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
5. "I feel like God sent me here to tell someone today, I know this isn't what you planned. And I know you imagine you'd be somewhere else right now. But trust God's plan. His plan's better than yours. I write my own narrative. I write my own, I forge my own path. I know. But we serve a God who knows the end and the beginning. You're over here trying to forge a path and a direction. God doesn't want you to go." [36:55] (56 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
### Quotes for members
1. "Coveting begins when comparison consumes us. It consumes you. It becomes the thing that's driving you. And the thing about coveting is it isolates you. Why? Because it makes you feel insecure. Making you feel like you're competing with others instead of supporting each other. Everything's a competition. It consumes you. It makes you focus on what you lack. And what does that do? It creates a sense of constant inadequacy." [18:19] (28 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
2. "When we compare our lives to others, we allow them to chart the course of our life. Why? Because the moment someone's life makes ours feel inadequate, we've let them define what our life should look like. Don't let someone's life become your benchmark." [15:49] (19 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
3. "You got to value contentment. In other words, it's got to be a priority in your life. In other words, you don't fall into contentment. Contentment is an intentional discipline. You're choosing to do it. What is contentment? Contentment isn't getting what you want. It's loving what you have. Oh, if I just had this, I'd be content. No, you wouldn't. You wouldn't because it'd be another thing. Contentment is not about getting that other thing. It's about loving what you have." [27:49] (29 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
4. "Community is a part of God's plan for you. So you need someone you can trust. You need accountability. Third thing is live gratefully. Everybody say live gratefully. Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. You know what gratitude does? Gratitude turns not enough into more than enough." [30:50] (23 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
5. "If you're here and your coveting has led you create a path of destruction like David's did, I want you to know that your hope is not lost. Now, you may not be free from the consequences, but you are free from condemnation because of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross. He paid the price for us. He paid for our sins. And through faith in Jesus, we are saved and we are reconciled." [38:14] (25 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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