Engaging Conversations: A Faithful Approach to Evangelism

 

Summary

In our journey of faith, we often find ourselves overwhelmed by the vastness of knowledge and the challenge of translating that into meaningful conversations with those who do not yet know the Lord. Today, I want to bridge that gap by providing a game plan that empowers you to engage in confident and effective conversations, regardless of your knowledge level or the demeanor of the person you're speaking with. This approach is rooted in the wisdom of Colossians 4:5-6, which encourages us to conduct ourselves with wisdom, grace, and tact.

The essence of this game plan is encapsulated in three simple yet profound principles: Be smart, be nice, and be tactical. Being smart involves using our heads and engaging with wisdom. Being nice means letting our speech be seasoned with grace, reflecting the gentleness and respect that Peter speaks of in 1 Peter 3:15. Being tactical involves treating each person as an individual, understanding their unique worldview, and engaging with them thoughtfully.

I propose a shift in our evangelistic focus from harvesting to gardening. Before any harvest, there is always a season of gardening, where seeds are planted, watered, and nurtured. Many of us are gardeners, not harvesters, and that's perfectly fine. Our role is to plant seeds of doubt in the minds of others about their worldviews, to till the soil of their hearts, and to water the seeds of truth. This is a team effort, and God will bring the harvest in His time.

To implement this game plan, we employ the "Columbo" tactic, named after the famous TV detective. This involves asking carefully selected questions to gather information and reverse the burden of proof. The first question, "What do you mean by that?" helps us understand the other person's perspective. The second question, "How did you come to that conclusion?" encourages them to provide reasons for their beliefs. These questions allow us to engage in meaningful conversations without pressure, enabling the Holy Spirit to work through our interactions.

By adopting this approach, we can confidently engage in conversations, knowing that our role is to plant seeds and trust God for the growth. Remember, our goal is not to win arguments but to put a stone in someone's shoe, to gently challenge their thinking and leave them pondering the truth of the Gospel.

Key Takeaways:

- Be Smart, Be Nice, Be Tactical: Engage with wisdom, grace, and tact, treating each person as an individual and understanding their unique worldview. This approach allows us to connect meaningfully and respectfully with others. [02:04]

- Shift from Harvesting to Gardening: Recognize that before any harvest, there is a season of gardening. Our role is to plant, water, and nurture seeds of truth, trusting God to bring the harvest in His time. [04:00]

- The Columbo Tactic: Use questions to gather information and reverse the burden of proof. Asking "What do you mean by that?" and "How did you come to that conclusion?" helps us engage without pressure and encourages others to think deeply about their beliefs. [13:19]

- No More Free Rides: When someone makes a claim, they bear the burden of proof. Encourage them to explain their reasoning, rather than taking on the responsibility to refute their claims. This approach fosters meaningful dialogue and understanding. [20:34]

- Trust the Holy Spirit: By asking thoughtful questions, we create space for the Holy Spirit to work in the hearts of others. Our role is to plant seeds and trust God for the growth, knowing that even small interactions can have a significant impact. [22:24]

Youtube Chapters:

[00:00] - Welcome
[00:08] - Introduction and Humor
[00:32] - Feeling Overwhelmed
[00:51] - Bridging Content to Conversation
[01:14] - The Promise of a Game Plan
[01:44] - Colossians 4:5-6: Be Smart, Be Nice, Be Tactical
[02:23] - Engaging with Wisdom
[03:14] - Understanding Worldviews
[04:00] - From Harvesting to Gardening
[05:19] - The Role of a Gardener
[06:31] - Putting a Stone in Their Shoe
[07:06] - Jesus and the Harvest
[08:14] - Reapers and Sowers
[09:15] - The Need for a Game Plan
[09:43] - Introducing the Columbo Tactic
[11:05] - The Power of Questions
[13:19] - Going on the Offensive Inoffensively
[14:23] - Gathering Information
[19:28] - Reversing the Burden of Proof
[22:24] - Trusting the Holy Spirit

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide

Bible Reading:
1. Colossians 4:5-6
2. 1 Peter 3:15
3. John 4:35-38

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Observation Questions:

1. What are the three principles derived from Colossians 4:5-6 that the sermon emphasizes for engaging in conversations? [02:04]

2. How does the sermon describe the shift from "harvesting" to "gardening" in the context of evangelism? [04:00]

3. What is the "Columbo tactic" and how is it used to engage in conversations according to the sermon? [13:19]

4. How does the sermon illustrate the concept of "reversing the burden of proof"? [20:34]

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Interpretation Questions:

1. How does the principle of "being smart" in Colossians 4:5-6 relate to the way Christians should approach conversations with non-believers? [02:04]

2. In what ways does the sermon suggest that being "nice" and "tactical" can impact the effectiveness of our conversations about faith? [02:36]

3. How does the analogy of "gardening" versus "harvesting" change the traditional view of evangelism, and what implications does this have for individual roles in sharing the Gospel? [04:00]

4. How might the "Columbo tactic" help in creating a space for the Holy Spirit to work during conversations? [22:24]

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Application Questions:

1. Reflect on a recent conversation you had about faith. How could you have applied the principles of being smart, nice, and tactical to improve that interaction? [02:04]

2. Identify a person in your life who might benefit from a "gardening" approach rather than a "harvesting" approach. What specific steps can you take to nurture their understanding of the Gospel? [04:00]

3. Think of a situation where you felt overwhelmed by the need to defend your faith. How can the "Columbo tactic" help you feel more confident in future conversations? [13:19]

4. Consider a time when someone made a claim about faith or spirituality. How did you respond, and how might you use the question "What do you mean by that?" to engage more effectively next time? [15:01]

5. Reflect on a moment when you felt pressured to provide evidence for your beliefs. How can reversing the burden of proof change the dynamic of such conversations? [20:34]

6. How can you create opportunities in your daily life to "put a stone in someone's shoe" and gently challenge their thinking about the Gospel? [06:31]

7. What specific actions can you take this week to trust the Holy Spirit more in your conversations, allowing Him to work through your interactions? [22:24]

Devotional

Day 1: Engage with Wisdom, Grace, and Tact
In our interactions with others, it is essential to approach conversations with wisdom, grace, and tact. This means being smart in our engagement, using our heads to understand the context and the person we are speaking with. It also involves being nice, ensuring our speech is seasoned with grace, reflecting the gentleness and respect that is encouraged in 1 Peter 3:15. Finally, being tactical means treating each person as an individual, understanding their unique worldview, and engaging with them thoughtfully. By doing so, we can connect meaningfully and respectfully with others, creating an environment where genuine dialogue can occur. [02:04]

Colossians 4:5-6 (ESV): "Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person."

Reflection: Think of a recent conversation where you struggled to communicate effectively. How can you apply wisdom, grace, and tact to improve your future interactions with that person?


Day 2: Embrace the Role of a Gardener
In the journey of faith, there is a shift from focusing solely on harvesting to embracing the role of a gardener. Before any harvest, there is always a season of gardening, where seeds are planted, watered, and nurtured. Many of us are called to be gardeners, not harvesters, and that's perfectly fine. Our role is to plant seeds of doubt in the minds of others about their worldviews, to till the soil of their hearts, and to water the seeds of truth. This is a team effort, and God will bring the harvest in His time. By recognizing and embracing this role, we can contribute to the growth of others' faith journeys. [04:00]

1 Corinthians 3:6-7 (ESV): "I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth."

Reflection: Identify one person in your life who may need spiritual nurturing. What practical steps can you take this week to plant or water seeds of truth in their life?


Day 3: Use the Columbo Tactic
The Columbo tactic is a powerful tool for engaging in meaningful conversations without pressure. It involves asking carefully selected questions to gather information and reverse the burden of proof. The first question, "What do you mean by that?" helps us understand the other person's perspective. The second question, "How did you come to that conclusion?" encourages them to provide reasons for their beliefs. These questions allow us to engage thoughtfully, enabling the Holy Spirit to work through our interactions. By adopting this approach, we can confidently engage in conversations, knowing that our role is to plant seeds and trust God for the growth. [13:19]

Proverbs 18:13 (ESV): "If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame."

Reflection: Think of a conversation where you felt defensive or pressured. How can you use the Columbo tactic to create a more open and understanding dialogue in similar situations?


Day 4: Encourage Others to Bear the Burden of Proof
In conversations about faith, it is important to remember that when someone makes a claim, they bear the burden of proof. Encourage them to explain their reasoning, rather than taking on the responsibility to refute their claims. This approach fosters meaningful dialogue and understanding, allowing both parties to explore the truth together. By shifting the focus from winning arguments to understanding perspectives, we can create a space for genuine exploration of beliefs. [20:34]

1 Thessalonians 5:21 (ESV): "But test everything; hold fast what is good."

Reflection: Reflect on a recent discussion where you felt the need to defend your beliefs. How can you encourage others to share their reasoning and engage in a more balanced conversation?


Day 5: Trust the Holy Spirit in Conversations
By asking thoughtful questions and engaging with others in a respectful manner, we create space for the Holy Spirit to work in the hearts of others. Our role is to plant seeds and trust God for the growth, knowing that even small interactions can have a significant impact. It is not our responsibility to change hearts, but to be faithful in our witness and trust that God will work through our efforts. By relying on the Holy Spirit, we can approach conversations with confidence and peace, knowing that God is in control. [22:24]

John 16:13 (ESV): "When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all the truth, for he will not speak on his own authority, but whatever he hears he will speak, and he will declare to you the things that are to come."

Reflection: Consider a conversation where you felt unsure of what to say. How can you rely more on the Holy Spirit to guide your words and actions in future interactions?

Quotes


This game plan follows the instructions by Paul in Colossians chapter 4. You might want to write this verse down. Colossians 4 verse 5 and 6, and here's what Paul says there; he says, "Conduct yourselves with wisdom towards outsiders. Make the most of the opportunity." In other words, be smart, OK? "Let your speech always be with grace seasoned, as it were, with salt, so that you will know how to respond to each person." [00:01:47]

I think largely when we think of evangelism, we are focused on harvesting, and we're thinking about going for the gold and trying to get the harvest. And I'm just gonna tell you, and some of you have been around the block a few times on this, the easy pickings are a little bit slim nowadays. There's got to be a lot more of what Dr. Francis Schaeffer used to call "pre-evangelism," where we work with people a little bit, we're a little bit more patient, we take more time. [00:03:43]

I have a suspicion that most of us are probably gardeners and not necessarily harvesters. I'm 43 years a Christian, I want to tell you something. I'm a gardener. I'm not a harvester. I'm glad to be part of the team as someone who plants and tills and waters and weeds a little bit in different people's lives, knowing that I got a whole bunch of other teammates that are doing a little gardening at the same time to bring that person, any individual, to a point of harvest, and then God's going to sovereignly bring a harvester into their life. [00:04:45]

And I have a feeling we need a whole lot more gardeners than we need harvesters. That is because before there is a harvest, there is always a season of gardening. So, we need you. We need you off the bench, but what you don't have is you don't have a game plan. And that's what I wrote this book "Tactics" for. It's subtitled "A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions" to be able to put in place something that any person in this audience can follow regardless of your level of education, to get you involved in productive conversations with people, OK? [00:09:03]

But there is one tactic that is really the core of the game plan. That is the easiest tactic imaginable to stop a challenger in their tracks, to turn the tables, to get them thinking, and to keep you in the driver's seat of the conversation, and that's my goal with the tactical approach. Not to overwhelm people, not to manipulate people, not to get in fights with people. I don't want to get into fights with people. My basic rule is, if anybody gets mad I lose, right? [00:10:05]

The key to the Columbo tactic, and the key to our game plan, the key to fulfilling the promise I made to you a few moments ago is that the Christian goes on the offensive in an inoffensive way with carefully selected questions that advance the conversation. Let me say that again: the key to the tactic and the key to our game plan is that the Christian goes on the offensive in an inoffensive way with carefully selected questions to advance the conversation. [00:13:03]

So, what this means then is when you find yourself in a circumstance where you're encountering somebody on whom you want to have a spiritual impact. That's all you're thinking, I want to do some gardening. I hope the Lord will use me here. I don't know where that's going to go. I don't know if it's gardening or harvesting, we don't know that, do we? The Lord knows that. We might see it, but let's just say all we want to do is just try to put a stone in their shoe. [00:13:51]

The first step in your game plan, you want to solve the crime, Lieutenant Columbo? How are you going to find the killer? You've got to gather some information. We encounter somebody new, or maybe if it is not somebody new, maybe somebody we've been around for a while and banged heads with for a while, but we actually never spent much time to gather some information and listen to them to be able to know how to position ourselves further in a conversation. [00:14:33]

Now, I’m going to call this "reversing the burden of proof." Reversing the burden of proof. And I’ll say this quickly because I'm almost out of time. "The burden of proof," that phrase means the responsibility some person has to give reason. The responsibility some person has to give reasons. Now, who is it that has the responsibility to give reasons in any conversation? And the answer is, the person who makes the claim bears the burden. [00:19:30]

So, here's the rule here: "No more free rides." In the immortal words of Ricky Ricardo, "They got a lot of 'splainin to do." So, we want to get them to do some 'splainin, right? And so, we have a second question now. And the second question is, "Now, how did you come to that conclusion?" What are your reasons for that? Why do you think that's the way it is? You see, we're not just going to let them say, "I can explain that," and then tell a story. [00:20:34]

You will be amazed that if you just asked two questions, "What do you mean by that?" and "How did you come to that conclusion?" as you work it into the conversation. How many times people will come up with what I call "the Simon and Garfunkel response." Remember those two guys back in 1966 wrote that song called "The Sounds of Silence"? You ask them what they mean and why they believe, and a lot of times you're going to get silence because they've never thought about it. [00:21:49]

And I'm just going to tell you, you're going to be stunned at watching the Holy Spirit work even though you're only asking questions. And see, now I've fulfilled my promise to you. I promised that I'd give you a game plan that would allow you to converse with confidence in any situation. No matter how little you know or how articulate or aggressive or even obnoxious the other person happens to be, now you have it, two questions. [00:22:24]

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Transcript
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