Empowering Growth Through Mentorship and Father Figures
Summary
### Summary
On this Father's Day, we explored the profound impact of mentorship, particularly through the lens of father figures. We began by recognizing the innate desire in men to "slay the dragon" in their lives, a metaphor for overcoming challenges and achieving personal growth. This journey often requires the guidance and counsel of mentors, much like the iconic mentor-protégé relationships we see in popular culture.
Statistics reveal the stark reality of fatherlessness in America, highlighting the critical role father figures play in providing stability, guidance, and opportunities. Even when biological fathers are absent, the presence of a mentor can significantly improve a young person's life outcomes. This underscores the universal need for affirmation, challenge, and belief from others, especially for men seeking to validate their manhood.
We delved into the biblical story of Moses and his father-in-law Jethro, who provided crucial counsel at a pivotal moment. Despite Moses' direct communication with God, he still needed Jethro's wisdom to manage the immense responsibility of leading Israel. Jethro's advice to delegate responsibilities was a game-changer, illustrating that even the most capable leaders need external guidance.
The sermon emphasized the importance of both giving and receiving counsel. True affirmation requires humility to listen and the courage to act on wise advice. It also involves offering counsel with affection and timing, ensuring it is received well. We must be open and flexible, like Phineas the honey bear, ready to receive and share wisdom, rather than being stubborn and closed off like Stanley.
Mentorship is not about having an agenda for others but about genuinely investing in their growth and success. Sharing our failures can often be more instructive than our successes, as it provides valuable lessons and reassures others that mistakes are part of the journey. Good mentors reinforce reality, reminding us of the challenges ahead and the importance of character over mere skill.
Ultimately, mentorship is about helping others grow in obedience and faith, guiding them with love and wisdom. As we reflect on our roles as mentors and protégés, we are called to forgive those who have let us down and seek forgiveness for our own shortcomings. By doing so, we align ourselves with God's relentless pursuit of wisdom and love in our lives.
### Key Takeaways
1. The Power of Mentorship: Mentorship provides stability, guidance, and opportunities, especially in fatherless homes. Statistics show that children with mentors are more likely to succeed in various aspects of life. This highlights the universal need for affirmation, challenge, and belief from others, which helps individuals overcome life's challenges and grow into their potential. [01:23]
2. Humility in Receiving Counsel: True affirmation requires humility to listen to and act on wise counsel. Moses, despite his direct communication with God, needed Jethro's advice to manage his responsibilities effectively. This teaches us that no matter how capable we are, we must remain open to external guidance to fulfill our purpose. [06:18]
3. Affectionate and Timely Counsel: Offering counsel with affection and at the right time ensures it is well-received. Jethro waited until Moses was worn out before offering his advice, making it more impactful. This approach emphasizes the importance of understanding and timing in mentorship, ensuring that advice is given when it can be most effective. [21:35]
4. Learning from Failures: Sharing our failures can be more instructive than sharing our successes. Failures provide valuable lessons and reassure others that mistakes are part of the journey. This approach helps mentees understand that success often comes through learning from setbacks and refining their approach. [25:21]
5. Forgiveness and Growth: Mentorship involves helping others grow in obedience and faith, guiding them with love and wisdom. It also requires us to forgive those who have let us down and seek forgiveness for our own shortcomings. This process aligns us with God's relentless pursuit of wisdom and love in our lives, fostering personal and spiritual growth. [34:12]
### YouTube Chapters
[0:00] - Welcome
[01:23] - The Impact of Father Figures
[02:40] - Personal Reflections on Mentorship
[05:02] - Moses and Jethro: A Biblical Example
[06:18] - The Importance of Listening
[07:36] - Jethro's Wise Counsel
[08:43] - Moses' Role as Judge
[09:58] - Jethro's Direct Advice
[11:12] - Delegation and Leadership
[12:38] - True Affirmation and Humility
[14:02] - The Wisdom of Action
[15:17] - Receiving Counsel from Others
[16:27] - Flexibility and Openness
[17:48] - Recognizing Flaws in Our Systems
[19:14] - The Tale of Two Honey Bears
[20:28] - Inviting and Receiving Feedback
[21:35] - Affectionate and Timely Counsel
[22:57] - The Right Timing in Mentorship
[24:11] - Avoiding Agendas in Mentorship
[25:21] - Learning from Failures
[26:35] - Asking Questions and Reinforcing Reality
[27:56] - The Reality of Pressure
[29:06] - The Lesson of Delegation
[30:17] - Character Over Skill
[31:37] - Direct but Non-Coercive Advice
[32:55] - God's Relentless Wisdom
[34:12] - Forgiveness and Growth
[35:42] - Closing Prayer
Study Guide
### Bible Study Discussion Guide
#### Bible Reading
- Exodus 18:1-27 - The story of Moses and Jethro, focusing on Jethro's counsel to Moses about delegating responsibilities.
#### Observation Questions
1. What specific advice did Jethro give to Moses regarding his leadership responsibilities? (Exodus 18:17-23)
2. How did Moses initially handle the disputes among the Israelites before Jethro's advice? (Exodus 18:13-16)
3. What were the qualifications Jethro suggested for the men Moses should appoint as leaders? (Exodus 18:21)
4. How did Moses respond to Jethro's counsel? (Exodus 18:24-26)
#### Interpretation Questions
1. Why do you think Moses, despite his direct communication with God, still needed Jethro's advice? (Exodus 18:17-18, [06:18])
2. How does Jethro's timing in offering his counsel to Moses illustrate the importance of giving advice at the right moment? (Exodus 18:13-14, [21:35])
3. What does the story of Moses and Jethro teach us about the role of humility in receiving counsel? (Exodus 18:24, [14:02])
4. How can sharing our failures, as mentioned in the sermon, be more instructive than sharing our successes? ([25:21])
#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on a time when you received valuable advice. How did you respond, and what was the outcome? How can you be more open to receiving counsel in the future? ([06:18])
2. Think about someone in your life who might benefit from your mentorship. How can you offer them affectionate and timely counsel? ([21:35])
3. Have you ever been in a situation where you needed to delegate responsibilities but struggled to do so? What steps can you take to improve your delegation skills? ([11:12])
4. Identify a recent failure you experienced. How can you use the lessons learned from that failure to mentor someone else? ([25:21])
5. Is there someone you need to forgive for not being the mentor or father figure you needed? How can you take steps toward forgiveness this week? ([34:12])
6. How can you ensure that your advice is given with the right timing and affection, as Jethro did with Moses? ([21:35])
7. Are there areas in your life where you are acting like "Stanley the stubborn bear" instead of "Phineas the honey bear"? How can you become more open and flexible to receiving wisdom from others? ([19:14])
Devotional
Day 1: The Power of Mentorship
Mentorship provides stability, guidance, and opportunities, especially in fatherless homes. Statistics show that children with mentors are more likely to succeed in various aspects of life. This highlights the universal need for affirmation, challenge, and belief from others, which helps individuals overcome life's challenges and grow into their potential. Mentorship is not just about providing advice but about investing in someone's growth and success. It involves sharing experiences, both successes and failures, to help mentees navigate their own journeys.
Mentors play a crucial role in shaping the lives of those they guide. They offer a sense of stability and direction, especially for those who lack a father figure. The presence of a mentor can significantly improve life outcomes, providing the affirmation and challenge needed to grow. This is a call to recognize the importance of mentorship in our communities and to step into roles where we can offer guidance and support to others. [01:23]
Proverbs 27:17 (ESV): "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."
Reflection: Think of someone in your life who could benefit from your guidance. How can you begin to invest in their growth and success today?
Day 2: Humility in Receiving Counsel
True affirmation requires humility to listen to and act on wise counsel. Moses, despite his direct communication with God, needed Jethro's advice to manage his responsibilities effectively. This teaches us that no matter how capable we are, we must remain open to external guidance to fulfill our purpose. Humility in receiving counsel means recognizing that we do not have all the answers and that others can offer valuable insights.
Moses' story with Jethro illustrates the importance of being open to advice, even when we feel confident in our abilities. Jethro's counsel to delegate responsibilities was a turning point for Moses, allowing him to lead more effectively. This example shows that seeking and accepting guidance is a sign of strength, not weakness. It requires humility to listen and the courage to act on the advice given. [06:18]
James 1:19 (ESV): "Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger."
Reflection: Reflect on a recent situation where you received advice. How did you respond, and what can you learn from that experience about humility and openness?
Day 3: Affectionate and Timely Counsel
Offering counsel with affection and at the right time ensures it is well-received. Jethro waited until Moses was worn out before offering his advice, making it more impactful. This approach emphasizes the importance of understanding and timing in mentorship, ensuring that advice is given when it can be most effective. Counsel given with love and at the right moment can transform lives.
The story of Jethro and Moses highlights the significance of timing and affection in giving advice. Jethro's counsel was effective because it was given when Moses was ready to receive it. This teaches us that the manner and timing of our advice can greatly influence its impact. Offering counsel with genuine care and at the right moment can make a profound difference in someone's life. [21:35]
Ecclesiastes 3:7 (ESV): "A time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak."
Reflection: Think about a time when you gave or received advice. How did the timing and manner of the counsel affect its reception and impact?
Day 4: Learning from Failures
Sharing our failures can be more instructive than sharing our successes. Failures provide valuable lessons and reassure others that mistakes are part of the journey. This approach helps mentees understand that success often comes through learning from setbacks and refining their approach. By being open about our own struggles, we can offer more relatable and practical guidance.
Mentorship is not about presenting a perfect image but about being authentic and transparent. Sharing our failures allows others to see that mistakes are a natural part of growth. It provides a realistic perspective on the journey to success and encourages resilience. By discussing our setbacks, we can offer valuable lessons and support to those we mentor. [25:21]
2 Corinthians 12:9 (ESV): "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me."
Reflection: Reflect on a recent failure or setback. How can you use this experience to offer guidance and encouragement to someone else?
Day 5: Forgiveness and Growth
Mentorship involves helping others grow in obedience and faith, guiding them with love and wisdom. It also requires us to forgive those who have let us down and seek forgiveness for our own shortcomings. This process aligns us with God's relentless pursuit of wisdom and love in our lives, fostering personal and spiritual growth. Forgiveness is a crucial aspect of mentorship, allowing both mentors and mentees to move forward and grow.
Forgiveness is essential in any mentoring relationship. It allows us to let go of past hurts and focus on growth and development. By seeking and offering forgiveness, we create an environment of grace and understanding. This aligns us with God's desire for us to grow in wisdom and love, fostering deeper connections and personal growth. [34:12]
Colossians 3:13 (ESV): "Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive."
Reflection: Is there someone you need to forgive or seek forgiveness from? How can you take a step towards reconciliation and growth today?
Quotes
### Quotes for Outreach
1. "When we have father figures in our lives, it produces greater stability. It produces greater guidance. It opens up the door for more opportunities. Also, when a young person lives in a fatherless home, here's what happens. 25 million children in the U.S. live without their biological fathers. 85% of the folks, of the kids in prison, are from fatherless homes. 71% of high school dropouts are from fatherless homes. 90% of all homeless children or runaways are from fatherless homes. Even so, when there is a father figure, some kind of an adult, pouring in to those children, 55% are more likely to go to college, 78% are more likely to volunteer regularly, and 130% are more likely to hold leadership positions." (46 seconds)
2. "There's something in each of us, isn't there? There's an ache to be encouraged, to be challenged, to be said, hey man, I see you. I affirm what's good in you. I challenge what's bad in you. And I believe in you. I know you can do this. I know you can slay that dragon. I'm betting most of you felt something like that ache before. Even if you had an awesome dad. I had an awesome dad. He didn't fail in any of those respects. And yet, I still wanted, as I became a young man, I wanted the affirmation of other men who could kind of evaluate and say, is this guy a man or isn't he?" (31 seconds)
3. "A key to fulfilling our purpose involves succeeding with the help of others. Succeeding with the help of others and helping others succeed. That's what Jethro did for Moses. He helped him succeed and Moses succeeded because he had help. It's trying to be clarified for us here in the book of Exodus that even if you're Moses, and really guys, I mean, think this through. Moses is writing this. He's saying, hey, people in the future who are going to read this, just so you know, even I need counsel from a mentor." (34 seconds)
4. "True affirmation requires men to humbly listen to counsel. What happened? Moses listened to his father's advice and followed his suggestions and he chose those leaders. He listened and he chose. He didn't just listen. He listened and then he chose. Moses knew what every wise person knows. It's only wisdom if you do it. If he would have just listened to the wisdom of Jethro, it wouldn't have made Moses wise. He's not wise until he does the wisdom." (26 seconds)
5. "True affirmation requires men to humbly listen to counsel. And here's number two, to affectionately offer counsel, to affectionately offer counsel. Think about how Jethro gives counsel here. He waits until the day is over. He waits until Moses is kind of worn out. He waits until Moses, Moses is like, oh man, that was hard. But he also does it in a way that makes Moses feel important. He's got the timing, right? My friends, if you're going to share feedback with folks, we want to get the timing right." (32 seconds)
### Quotes for Members
1. "Sometimes, maybe for you, you have mishandled the mentoring thing. As I have on different occasions. There was a time, there's probably multiple times when I was wanting a certain person to be a mentor to me. But honestly, there were times I was so arrogant around them that they learned quickly, I don't know, this one's too difficult. This isn't going to be so easy. I'm going to move on to an easier guy. Maybe you've been like me also who, when God did entrust you with someone else to encourage them, maybe you messed it up a little bit. Maybe you didn't do the right thing and you didn't end up helping him in the way that you'd hoped you could." (31 seconds)
2. "Moses, so he asked him, Moses' father-in-law saw that Moses was doing for all the people. He asked, what are you really accomplishing here? Why are you trying to do all this alone while everyone stands around you? From morning till evening. Okay. So this is the end of the day. Jethro has just watched Moses, big lines of people coming to Moses, sitting down in this little booth. And they're saying, well, here's the story. Here's what we did. Moses weighs in. Well, here's what God thinks. Here's what you should do. Jethro's watched him all day. Moses gets home. It's probably, you know, time to eat, eat dinner. Let's all sit down. And Jethro says, by the way, Moses, I've been watching this and I just want to know, what are you doing? What do you think you're like, what are you accomplishing here? Why are you doing this? Why are you doing this? Why are you doing this alone?" (44 seconds)
3. "Moses wisely was open to that. He was open to Jethro. Jethro, I mean, he's like, Moses, this thing is good that you're doing. Like, it's a good heart that you're doing it. I hear why it's you. It makes sense that it's you. It's just that the way you're doing it, bro, you're not going to last like this. How are you ever going to lead these people if you got to meet with every single one of them? Moses was blessed to have Jethro." (26 seconds)
4. "If you follow this advice and if God commands you to do so, then you will be able to endure the pressures and all these people will go home in peace. Moses listened to his father-in-law's advice and followed his suggestions. He chose capable men from all over Israel and appointed them as leaders over the people, put them in charge of groups of 1,000, 100, 50, and 10. These men were available to solve the people's common disputes. They brought the major cases to Moses, but they took care of the smaller matters themselves. Soon after this, Moses said goodbye to his father-in-law who returned to his own land." (31 seconds)
5. "What's God doing here? What's God doing with Moses? And he's really doing it with Jethro too. He's coming as wisdom to them. He's coming as the sage Jesus. Jesus is wisdom from God for us. Is it possible? Jesus' wisdom has been coming to you and sometimes you like me have rejected it. You're like, I can't hear this. We're really being unteachable. And we say, wisdom from God, go away. Go Because this looks like wisdom to me over here. If that's true, I want to tell you, welcome to the club. I've done that a lot. He comes again to get us. Here's something Jesus said, all that my father gives me will come to me. And the one who comes to me, I will certainly not cast out. See, even though we resist wisdom, wisdom keeps coming. It says, well, let's try again. Well, let's try again. Why? Because Jesus doesn't give up ever. Love never gives up. He'll just keep chasing you. He'll just keep coming. He'll be like, oh, you didn't do that. Let's try it this way. Let me tell you through somebody else. Let me tell you through somebody else. Let me tell you through a wipeout. Boom. Let me tell you through somebody else. Your God loves you so much. He will come chasing you with wisdom." (81 seconds)