Embracing Understanding: Overcoming Dismissal and Division

 

Summary

In today's reflection, I delved into the pervasive issue of dismissing those with whom we disagree, a problem that I recognize in myself and see mirrored in our society at large. This tendency to reject others without seeking to understand them is deeply rooted in what the Bible refers to as worldliness. Worldliness is often misunderstood as superficial behaviors, but it fundamentally represents a system of thought and behavior that stands in opposition to God's ways. It is anti-shalom, fostering division and exclusion.

C.S. Lewis's concept of the "inner ring" illustrates how the desire to belong to an exclusive group can lead us astray. In "The Screwtape Letters," Lewis warns of the temptation to seek acceptance in circles that may lead us away from God's truth. This desire for inclusion often results in the dismissal of others, a behavior that has become alarmingly common in our culture.

Marilyn Robinson's essay on puritanism highlights how we often disparage groups without understanding them, using terms like "puritan" as a means to gain social approval. This behavior is not limited to one side of the political spectrum; it is a universal issue. The story of a pastor facing backlash for a simple sign in his yard illustrates how quickly we can judge without understanding.

Jesus, the ultimate "culturally repugnant other," broke down barriers and taught us to love not just our neighbors but our enemies. He challenged us to stop dismissing others and to seek understanding. A practical step towards this is to give ourselves time to think before reacting. As James advises, be slow to speak, slow to anger, and quick to listen. This practice of giving it "five minutes" can help us move from a place of judgment to one of understanding and love.

Key Takeaways:

1. Worldliness and Exclusion: Worldliness is not just about superficial behaviors but a mindset that opposes God's ways, fostering division and exclusion. It is crucial to recognize this in ourselves and strive for a community that reflects God's inclusive love. [01:36]

2. The Inner Ring Temptation: The desire to belong to exclusive groups can lead us away from God's truth. We must be vigilant against this temptation and seek to align our desires with God's will, rather than societal approval. [02:08]

3. Misunderstanding and Disparagement: We often disparage groups without understanding them, using terms like "puritan" to gain social approval. This behavior closes off inquiry and understanding, which are essential for true community. [05:54]

4. Jesus' Example of Inclusion: Jesus broke down barriers and taught us to love our enemies. His life challenges us to stop dismissing others and to seek understanding, building a community that reflects God's love. [09:13]

5. The Practice of Patience: Giving ourselves time to think before reacting can help us move from judgment to understanding. As James advises, be slow to speak, slow to anger, and quick to listen, fostering a more thoughtful and loving approach to others. [10:20]

Youtube Chapters:

- [00:00] - Welcome
- [00:24] - The Problem of Dismissing Others
- [01:06] - Understanding Worldliness
- [01:51] - C.S. Lewis and the Inner Ring
- [02:45] - Modern Misunderstandings
- [03:44] - The Misuse of "Puritan"
- [05:08] - Social Approval and Disparagement
- [06:38] - The Culturally Repugnant Other
- [07:45] - Real-Life Examples of Dismissal
- [09:00] - Jesus and the Culturally Repugnant Other
- [09:40] - The Wisdom of "Give it Five Minutes"
- [10:20] - James' Advice on Listening
- [11:03] - Closing Thoughts

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide

Bible Reading:
1. James 1:19 - "My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry."
2. Matthew 5:44 - "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."
3. Romans 12:2 - "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind."

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Observation Questions:

1. According to the sermon, how does the concept of "worldliness" differ from common perceptions of the term? [01:06]
2. What does C.S. Lewis's idea of the "inner ring" reveal about our desires for social acceptance? [01:51]
3. How does the misuse of the term "puritan" illustrate our tendency to dismiss others without understanding? [05:08]
4. What example did the pastor give to illustrate how quickly we can judge others without understanding their perspective? [07:45]

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Interpretation Questions:

1. How does the Bible's definition of worldliness challenge our everyday interactions and judgments of others? [01:06]
2. In what ways can the desire to belong to an "inner ring" lead us away from God's truth, according to the sermon? [02:08]
3. How does Jesus' teaching to love our enemies challenge the cultural norm of dismissing those we disagree with? [09:13]
4. What does the practice of "giving it five minutes" teach us about patience and understanding in our relationships? [10:20]

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Application Questions:

1. Reflect on a recent situation where you dismissed someone without understanding their perspective. How could you have approached it differently? [00:24]
2. Identify a group or individual you tend to judge quickly. What steps can you take to seek understanding and build bridges instead? [07:12]
3. How can you resist the temptation to seek approval from exclusive groups that may lead you away from God's truth? [02:08]
4. Think of a time when you felt excluded or judged. How can that experience help you empathize with others who feel the same way? [09:00]
5. What practical steps can you take to be "slow to speak, slow to anger, and quick to listen" in your daily interactions? [10:20]
6. How can you incorporate the practice of "giving it five minutes" into your decision-making process this week? [09:40]
7. Consider someone you view as an "enemy" or someone you strongly disagree with. How can you actively show love and understanding towards them this week? [09:13]

Devotional

Day 1: Recognizing Worldliness in Our Lives
Worldliness is not merely about superficial behaviors but represents a mindset that opposes God's ways, fostering division and exclusion. It is crucial to recognize this tendency within ourselves and strive for a community that reflects God's inclusive love. By understanding worldliness as a system of thought that stands against divine principles, we can begin to dismantle the barriers it creates. This requires a conscious effort to align our actions and thoughts with God's teachings, promoting unity and understanding rather than division. [01:36]

James 4:4 (ESV): "You adulterous people! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God."

Reflection: In what ways have you noticed worldliness influencing your thoughts or actions? How can you actively work to align your mindset with God's ways today?


Day 2: Resisting the Inner Ring Temptation
The desire to belong to exclusive groups can lead us away from God's truth. This temptation, as illustrated by C.S. Lewis's concept of the "inner ring," can cause us to prioritize societal approval over divine will. It is essential to remain vigilant against this temptation and seek to align our desires with God's will. By doing so, we can resist the pull of exclusivity and instead foster a spirit of inclusivity and acceptance, reflecting the love and truth of God in our interactions with others. [02:08]

Galatians 1:10 (ESV): "For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ."

Reflection: Identify a situation where you felt the pull to seek approval from an exclusive group. How can you refocus your desires to align with God's truth instead?


Day 3: Overcoming Misunderstanding and Disparagement
We often disparage groups without understanding them, using terms like "puritan" to gain social approval. This behavior closes off inquiry and understanding, which are essential for true community. By recognizing this tendency, we can open ourselves to deeper understanding and connection with others. It is important to approach others with a spirit of curiosity and empathy, seeking to understand their perspectives rather than dismissing them based on preconceived notions or societal labels. [05:54]

Proverbs 18:2 (ESV): "A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion."

Reflection: Think of a group or individual you have misunderstood or judged harshly. How can you take a step towards understanding them better today?


Day 4: Embracing Jesus' Example of Inclusion
Jesus broke down barriers and taught us to love our enemies. His life challenges us to stop dismissing others and to seek understanding, building a community that reflects God's love. By following Jesus' example, we can learn to embrace those who are different from us and extend love and grace to all, regardless of their background or beliefs. This requires a commitment to seeing others through the lens of God's love and actively working to break down the barriers that divide us. [09:13]

Ephesians 2:14 (ESV): "For he himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in his flesh the dividing wall of hostility."

Reflection: Who in your life do you find difficult to love or understand? How can you take a step towards breaking down barriers and extending love to them today?


Day 5: Practicing Patience and Understanding
Giving ourselves time to think before reacting can help us move from judgment to understanding. As James advises, be slow to speak, slow to anger, and quick to listen, fostering a more thoughtful and loving approach to others. This practice of patience allows us to respond with grace and empathy, creating space for genuine connection and understanding. By taking a moment to pause and reflect before reacting, we can cultivate a spirit of love and acceptance in our interactions with others. [10:20]

Proverbs 19:11 (ESV): "Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense."

Reflection: Consider a recent situation where you reacted quickly in anger or judgment. How can you practice patience and understanding in similar situations moving forward?

Quotes


and it is the problem of dismissing people with whom i disagree, of rejecting them of even wanting to reject them without seeking to deeply understand them of closing my heart off to people, and ironically very often i do this we do this because there's another group of people that i think of as attractive or powerful or influential and i want to identify with them i want to be a part of their tribe so i don't want to be a part of that tribe now that notion of us versus them [00:00:30]

but really it simply means the system of human thought and behavior when it is set up in opposition to god, apart from the way that god wants things to be the world is kind of anti-shalom and that desire to exclude people to reject people without thoughtfulness as a deep part of worldliness i i talked not too long ago about c.s lewis's essay the inner ring and how the desire to be a part of the inner ring amen you're out prompts people to do very bad things [00:01:25]

and she writes about how in our day the term puritan has just become a standard insult for somebody but it's not based on knowledge that actually the puritans were quite a vibrant people they did not go around dressed in black they didn't carry crosses they were actually less theocratic she writes then anglicans and catholics who were in charge of much of europe they had a looser set of rules they were in fact she said the most progressive people on the earth until the end of the 19th century [00:03:55]

and yet ironically in our day puritan has become a term of disparagement to imply that somebody is rigid, narrow-minded, joyless, and she notes that actually when we use the term puritan in that way we are exhibiting the very characteristics that we mistakenly accuse the puritans of, so she asks why do we do that, well she says we disparage people about whom we have little or no information or knowledge [00:04:28]

because we look forward to the reward of expressing a socially approved opinion that is jacob's rights we deploy the accusation of puritanism because we know the people we're talking to will share our disparagement of puritanism and will approve of us for invoking it whether the term is we use it has any significant relationship to the reality of puritan actions and beliefs is totally irrelevant the word doesn't have any meaning as such [00:04:56]

and the reason for it she says is because of the existence of what she calls the culturally repugnant other the culturally repugnant other the person with whom i disagree so that i simply want to dismiss them without seeking to understand them because it makes me feel superior and that is a huge problem in our world and it's not just the left that does it towards fundamentalism or with words like puritan that have been redefined in destructive ways [00:07:12]

and how often do people do that he said in that case people were talking about things like critical race theory it was not clear that any of them have ever actually read marks or could actually name a single scholar or a single scholarly article on critical race theory and might there be something to learn from that we just simply want to disparage people because of the reward that we know awaits us for expressing a socially approved opinion [00:08:16]

and so we pause to remember that jesus himself was the great culturally repugnant other that's what got him crucified and he constantly broke down that wall and he would tell stories about culturally repugnant others like the good samaritan to build a little community of people who stopped dismissing others even others with whom they disagreed who would seek to love not just their neighbor but their enemy [00:08:57]

and at first the listener didn't like that response at all but then he realized the wisdom of it he realized that he had gone into what he calls refutation mode where rather than trying to think rather than seek to understand he was just busy generating reasons that would sustain his disagreement and his sense of superiority and that's become kind of a mantra now give it five minutes whereas jesus brother james put it let everyone be slow to speak slow to anger quick to listen give it five minutes today [00:10:00]

for me maybe for you instead of just dismissing people instead of just unthinkingly critiquing and feeling superior over anybody with whom i disagree give it five minutes today when there's that hard voice when there is that difficult person instead of wishing that they did not exist or thinking how glad you are that you are not they i thank you god that i am not instead give it five minutes slow to speak slow to anger quick to listen [00:10:31]

and a thoughtful mind [00:11:11]

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