Embracing Singleness and Marriage: A Divine Perspective
Summary
### Summary
Welcome, everyone. Today, we are diving into a topic that is often overlooked but deeply significant: the idolization of marriage and singleness. We began by reflecting on the importance of discipleship within our church community, emphasizing that our goal is to make and be disciples, both within and outside the church. This sets the stage for our discussion on how we view marriage and singleness in the context of our faith.
We started by acknowledging the cultural and church pressures that often make singles feel incomplete or less valued. I shared my own experiences as a single pastor, highlighting how Jesus, who was single, gave His undivided attention to God. Jesus is our ultimate example, showing that singleness is not a state of lack but an opportunity for undivided devotion to God. We must remember that Jesus, despite being single, fulfilled His divine mission and offers us the same power to live fully in our current state.
We then turned to Matthew 19, where Jesus speaks about the sanctity of marriage. Jesus holds marriage in high regard, stating that it is a union created by God and should not be separated by man. However, He also acknowledges that due to the hardness of human hearts, divorce was permitted under certain circumstances. This underscores that while marriage is a beautiful and divine institution, it is not ultimate. Our relationship with God surpasses all earthly relationships.
Next, we explored 1 Corinthians 7, where Paul advises believers to remain in their current state, whether married or single, due to the present distress and the imminent return of Jesus. Paul emphasizes that singleness allows for undivided devotion to the Lord, free from the anxieties that often accompany marriage. This is not to diminish the value of marriage but to highlight the unique opportunities that singleness offers for serving God.
We discussed the practical implications of this teaching. For singles, this means leveraging their state to serve God without distraction. For married couples, it means ensuring that their marriage does not become an idol but remains a partnership that glorifies God. We must all strive for undivided devotion to the Lord, whether single or married.
In our response time, we reflected on how we can apply these teachings in our lives. We took communion, remembering Jesus' sacrifice, and prayed for healing and undivided devotion to God. We also acknowledged the contributions of singles in our church, encouraging them to continue serving and being an integral part of our community.
### Key Takeaways
1. Jesus as the Ultimate Example for Singles:
Jesus, who was single, gave His undivided attention to God and fulfilled His divine mission. This shows that singleness is not a state of lack but an opportunity for undivided devotion to God. Jesus understands the loneliness and challenges that come with singleness, and He offers comfort and hope. Remembering Jesus in our singleness can empower us to live fully and purposefully. [01:14:10]
2. The High View of Marriage:
Jesus holds marriage in high regard, stating that it is a union created by God and should not be separated by man. However, He also acknowledges that due to the hardness of human hearts, divorce was permitted under certain circumstances. This underscores that while marriage is a beautiful and divine institution, it is not ultimate. Our relationship with God surpasses all earthly relationships. [33:46]
3. Undivided Devotion in Singleness:
Paul advises believers to remain in their current state, whether married or single, due to the present distress and the imminent return of Jesus. Singleness allows for undivided devotion to the Lord, free from the anxieties that often accompany marriage. This is not to diminish the value of marriage but to highlight the unique opportunities that singleness offers for serving God. [44:24]
4. Leveraging Singleness for God's Kingdom:
Singles have a unique opportunity to serve God without the distractions that come with marriage. This time of singleness is a holy time, set apart for undistracted service to the Lord. Singles should not see their state as a punishment but as a divine opportunity to fulfill God's purpose. [53:15]
5. Marriage as a Partnership for God's Glory:
For married couples, it is crucial to ensure that their marriage does not become an idol but remains a partnership that glorifies God. Marriage should be a picture of the Gospel, showing the world God's covenant love. Couples should strive for undivided devotion to the Lord, serving Him together and setting an example for others. [01:11:48]
### YouTube Chapters
1. [0:00] - Welcome
2. [07:58] - Opening Prayer and Praise
3. [14:57] - Discipleship and Community
4. [22:18] - Introduction to the Sermon
5. [23:10] - Living Free Series Overview
6. [24:16] - Understanding Idols
7. [25:37] - The Idol of Marriage and Singleness
8. [27:27] - Personal Experience with Singleness
9. [31:18] - Jesus' High View of Marriage
10. [33:46] - Biblical Foundation of Marriage
11. [39:03] - 1 Corinthians 7: Singleness and Devotion
12. [44:24] - Undivided Devotion to the Lord
13. [45:21] - Living Free in Singleness
14. [47:34] - Advantages of Singleness
15. [51:00] - Serving God in Singleness
16. [53:15] - Leveraging Singleness for the Gospel
17. [55:03] - Misconceptions About Singleness
18. [56:33] - Living Set Apart
19. [58:18] - The Value of Singles in the Church
20. [01:01:26] - Community and Service
21. [01:03:05] - Biblical Examples of Singleness
22. [01:04:35] - Focused Devotion to God
23. [01:06:04] - Avoiding Distractions in Marriage
24. [01:09:17] - Preparing for Marriage
25. [01:11:48] - Serving Singles in the Church
26. [01:14:10] - Jesus as the Ultimate Example
27. [01:16:32] - Communion and Response
28. [01:17:13] - Final Prayer and Giving
29. [01:25:54] - Closing Remarks and Farewell
Study Guide
### Bible Study Discussion Guide
#### Bible Reading
1. Matthew 19:4-6
2. 1 Corinthians 7:25-35
#### Observation Questions
1. In Matthew 19:4-6, what does Jesus say about the creation and purpose of marriage?
2. According to 1 Corinthians 7:32-35, what are the differences in concerns between married and unmarried individuals?
3. How does the sermon describe Jesus' view of marriage and singleness? ([32:19])
4. What practical advice does Paul give to those who are single in 1 Corinthians 7:27-28?
#### Interpretation Questions
1. Why does Jesus emphasize the sanctity of marriage in Matthew 19:4-6? How does this reflect God's original design for relationships?
2. How does Paul's advice in 1 Corinthians 7:25-35 reflect the urgency of the times he was living in? What does this suggest about the priorities for believers?
3. The sermon mentions that singleness allows for undivided devotion to the Lord. How does this align with Paul's teachings in 1 Corinthians 7? ([44:24])
4. What does the sermon suggest about the cultural pressures on singles within the church? How does this compare to the biblical perspective on singleness? ([26:35])
#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on your current state, whether single or married. How can you leverage your situation to serve God more fully? ([53:15])
2. For those who are single, what are some specific ways you can use your time and freedom to advance God's kingdom? How can you avoid the idolization of marriage? ([48:28])
3. For married couples, how can you ensure that your marriage remains a partnership that glorifies God and does not become an idol? What steps can you take to serve God together more effectively? ([51:00])
4. How can the church community better support and integrate singles, ensuring they feel valued and included? What practical steps can you take to foster this inclusivity? ([58:18])
5. Think about a time when you felt pressured by cultural or church expectations regarding marriage or singleness. How did you handle it, and what biblical truths can help you navigate such pressures in the future? ([26:35])
6. How can you cultivate an undivided devotion to the Lord in your current state? Identify one specific distraction in your life and plan a concrete step to minimize it this week. ([44:24])
7. Reflect on the example of Jesus as a single person. How can His life and mission inspire you to live fully and purposefully in your current state? ([01:14:10])
Devotional
Day 1: Jesus as the Ultimate Example for Singles
Description: Jesus, who was single, gave His undivided attention to God and fulfilled His divine mission. This shows that singleness is not a state of lack but an opportunity for undivided devotion to God. Jesus understands the loneliness and challenges that come with singleness, and He offers comfort and hope. Remembering Jesus in our singleness can empower us to live fully and purposefully. [01:14:10]
1 Corinthians 7:32-34 (ESV): "I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit."
Reflection: How can you use your current state of singleness to deepen your relationship with God and serve Him more fully today?
Day 2: The High View of Marriage
Description: Jesus holds marriage in high regard, stating that it is a union created by God and should not be separated by man. However, He also acknowledges that due to the hardness of human hearts, divorce was permitted under certain circumstances. This underscores that while marriage is a beautiful and divine institution, it is not ultimate. Our relationship with God surpasses all earthly relationships. [33:46]
Matthew 19:4-6 (ESV): "He answered, 'Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.'"
Reflection: In what ways can you ensure that your marriage (or future marriage) remains a partnership that glorifies God rather than becoming an idol?
Day 3: Undivided Devotion in Singleness
Description: Paul advises believers to remain in their current state, whether married or single, due to the present distress and the imminent return of Jesus. Singleness allows for undivided devotion to the Lord, free from the anxieties that often accompany marriage. This is not to diminish the value of marriage but to highlight the unique opportunities that singleness offers for serving God. [44:24]
1 Corinthians 7:29-31 (ESV): "This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away."
Reflection: How can you focus on undivided devotion to the Lord in your current state, whether single or married, and what practical steps can you take to minimize distractions?
Day 4: Leveraging Singleness for God's Kingdom
Description: Singles have a unique opportunity to serve God without the distractions that come with marriage. This time of singleness is a holy time, set apart for undistracted service to the Lord. Singles should not see their state as a punishment but as a divine opportunity to fulfill God's purpose. [53:15]
Isaiah 56:3-5 (ESV): "Let not the foreigner who has joined himself to the Lord say, 'The Lord will surely separate me from his people'; and let not the eunuch say, 'Behold, I am a dry tree.' For thus says the Lord: 'To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose the things that please me and hold fast my covenant, I will give in my house and within my walls a monument and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that shall not be cut off.'"
Reflection: What specific ways can you leverage your singleness to serve God's kingdom more effectively today?
Day 5: Marriage as a Partnership for God's Glory
Description: For married couples, it is crucial to ensure that their marriage does not become an idol but remains a partnership that glorifies God. Marriage should be a picture of the Gospel, showing the world God's covenant love. Couples should strive for undivided devotion to the Lord, serving Him together and setting an example for others. [01:11:48]
Ephesians 5:31-33 (ESV): "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."
Reflection: How can you and your spouse work together to ensure that your marriage reflects God's covenant love and serves as a testimony to others?
Quotes
### Quotes for Outreach
1. "When you're single and Jesus calls you to do something, you can just do it. There's no bureaucracy. You just do it. And guys, listen. Don't miss out. Don't miss out. There are things that I did to serve King Jesus that I could only have done when I was single. In fact, there are things that I still get phone calls for. Like when they want me to go preach four weeks of youth camp in some different state. And I'm like, yeah, that was a really good 22-year-old Brandon job. That was really cool. That's not so good Brandon in his 30s with three kids. And it's not as easy for me to say yes." [52:33]
2. "Single people, don't listen to the world to tell you that your singleness needs curing. Your singleness doesn't need curing. In fact, start figuring out now how to fulfill your calling in the world. You're taking notes. Write this down. God wants you to live set apart. God wants you to live set apart. And the word, the set apart word, there's a church word for it called holy. Everybody say holy. Holy. That word holy means to be set apart, means to be different. And those of you who are single, God wants you to live holy. God wants you to live set apart." [55:46]
3. "When you are single, you can live a life of freedom to just serve Jesus. Like listen. And I see it in this church. Like Impact Church, listen to me. We are blessed with single men and women in this church. Leveraging their state for the advancement of the gospel. I'm telling you, they set an example to us of how they tirelessly work for the kingdom." [53:15]
4. "Marriage is wonderful, but it's hard. Now, it's hard in its rightful place, like God uses it to sanctify us. But right now. If you are in a state where you can serve the Lord without that type of worldly trouble, live in that freedom. Look at verse 32 with me. Verse 32. First Corinthians 732. God says, I want you to be free from anxiety. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord and how to please the Lord. So, guys, when you're single, you are able to serve God without that distraction." [47:34]
### Quotes for Members
1. "When you are single, you can say yes. Everybody say yes. When you are single, you can say yes to Jesus way easier. See, when you're married, Jesus calls you to do something. Now you've got to go through some branches of government. Okay? Jesus has called you to plant a church. Now I've got to talk to the wife. Okay? I don't know where this example came from, but. You've got to talk to the wife. Okay? Then you've got kids. You've got to talk to the kids. And you've got to go through these stages to get where God wants you to do." [51:00]
2. "Jesus has a high view of marriage. Jesus has a high view of marriage. And, I know some of you are going, okay, Brandon, I thought you were going to talk to the singles. And, I am. I am. And, I am talking to those who are in a marriage. I am talking to those who are in a single state. But, I think we need to understand the danger in this, especially the passage we're going to read next, is that there might be even some in the house that are married that might use something like this to have a lower view of their marriage. And, I want to show you that marriage is held in a very high view by Jesus." [32:19]
3. "Paul is saying, No, no, no, no. Stay as you are. And his reasoning is this. The world is messed up. And Jesus is coming soon. Therefore, stay focused on Jesus. Don't focus on your marital status more than you are focusing on the return of Jesus. Paul is saying, Man, I want you to be free from this. Well, let's keep reading. He says that in verse 32. Don't take my word for it. Verse 32. I want you to be free from anxiety. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord and how to please the Lord. But the not the. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided." [43:18]
4. "When you are single, you can live a life of freedom to just serve Jesus. Like listen. And I see it in this church. Like Impact Church, listen to me. We are blessed with single men and women in this church. Leveraging their state for the advancement of the gospel. I'm telling you, they set an example to us of how they tirelessly work for the kingdom. And we ought not say things like, yeah, I remember when I was single, I could do that too. We ought not say horrible things like that. We ought to lift them up and cherish them. And say things to them like, man, keep going. I can't do what you're doing right now, but what gas can I throw on your fire? Because man, that is amazing." [53:15]
5. "So, married people, my question for you is, if people looked at your marriage, if a single follower of Jesus, came to your house and observed your marriage, would they still want to get married? Would they look at it and go, man, that's beautiful. That's worth, that's worth giving up the undivided focus I have now to come do this to build God's peace. And if you're single, my encouragement to you is this, and if you get just one sentence, you write this down. Remember Jesus. Just remember Jesus. Jesus is your example. I had to remind people of this all the time." [01:12:38]
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