Embracing Singleness: A Divine Gift for God's Kingdom

Summary

In the presence of God, we gather as a people confident that He meets us, not because of our merit, but because of the love He has shown us in Christ. We remember His faithfulness, His mighty deeds, and we seek His joy to fill every heart as we extend grace and kindness to one another. Today, we reflect on the unique season of singleness, not as a consolation prize or a lesser calling, but as a gift from God, just as marriage is. Both are given according to His divine purpose, and both are to be received with gratitude and leveraged for His kingdom.

Scripture, especially 1 Corinthians 7 and Matthew 19, reveals that singleness is not a deficiency or a waiting room for something better. Jesus and Paul both affirm that singleness can be a deliberate, God-honoring choice, whether it is lifelong, circumstantial, or chosen for the sake of the kingdom. In a culture that idolizes romantic relationships and sexual expression, the call to celibacy and surrendered living stands as a radical, countercultural witness. Yet, God’s design is not to withhold good from His people, but to invite each of us—single or married—into a life of devotion, service, and joy rooted in Christ.

Our identity is not found in our marital status, but in our redemptive status as beloved children of God. Contentment in Christ does not require the denial of desire, but it does call us to trust that God’s gifts and timing are good. The church is called to be a family that values every member, regardless of life stage, and to foster community that crosses generational and relational lines. Each season of life brings unique gifts and opportunities to serve, and we are all called to leverage those for our single purpose: to make much of Christ and advance His kingdom.

As we heard from Susan’s testimony, a life surrendered to Christ—whether single or married—is a life of purpose, impact, and deep intimacy with God. The challenge before us is to continue this conversation, to encourage one another, and to ask ourselves how we can use our unique gifts for God’s glory. Our hope and fulfillment are ultimately found in Christ, and our future is anchored in the promise of being united with Him forever.

Key Takeaways

- Singleness and Marriage Are Both Divine Gifts
God is the giver of both singleness and marriage, and neither is superior to the other. Each is a unique calling and a gift to be stewarded for His purposes, not a measure of spiritual maturity or value. Embracing this truth frees us from cultural pressures and allows us to receive our current season with gratitude and purpose. [42:01]

- Identity Is Rooted in Redemption, Not Relationship Status
Our worth and identity are not determined by whether we are single or married, but by our status as redeemed children of God. The love of Christ is sufficient, and intimacy with Him is deeper and more lasting than any human relationship. This truth sustains us through seasons of loneliness or longing and anchors us in unshakeable hope. [01:01:00]

- Contentment and Desire Can Coexist
It is possible to desire marriage and still be content in singleness. Contentment in Christ does not require the denial of God-given desires, but it does call us to trust Him with those desires and not let them control us. True contentment sees the goodness of God in every circumstance, even when our desires remain unfulfilled. [01:02:48]

- Leverage Your Season for Kingdom Purpose
Every season of life brings unique opportunities and gifts. The call is to ask, “What are the gifts unique to my season, and am I leveraging them for my single purpose?” Whether single or married, we are not meant to be spectators but active participants in God’s mission, using our lives to serve, love, and point others to Christ. [01:04:57]

- The Church Is a Family for All, Not Defined by Marital Status
Community in the body of Christ should cross generational and relational boundaries. Singles and marrieds alike are called to invite, include, and pursue one another in genuine fellowship. Our relationships with each other find their meaning in our relationship with Christ, and together we reflect the future hope of the church as the bride of Christ. [01:04:15]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[29:30] - Gathering in God’s Presence
[30:45] - Prayers for Healing and Restoration
[33:33] - Scripture Reading: 1 Corinthians 7:7-9
[34:51] - Introducing the Topic of Singleness
[35:06] - Church Announcements and Community Life
[36:54] - Framing the Question: What Is My Single Purpose?
[37:25] - A Theology of Singleness
[41:29] - Singleness as a Gift from God
[43:08] - Jesus’ Teaching on Singleness in Matthew 19
[44:52] - Challenging Cultural Assumptions About Marriage
[47:22] - Celibacy and Surrendered Living
[49:14] - Denying Ourselves and Following Christ
[52:08] - Our Single Purpose: Leveraging Life for the Kingdom
[52:59] - Testimony: Susan’s Story of Faithful Singleness
[58:40] - Practical Encouragements for Singles
[01:03:26] - Broader Application: Community and Calling
[01:06:32] - The Ultimate Hope: Christ and His Bride
[01:07:31] - Continuing the Conversation and Resources
[01:10:02] - Benediction and Sending Forth

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide: Singleness, Marriage, and Our Single Purpose

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### Bible Reading

- 1 Corinthians 7:7-9
"I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion."

- Matthew 19:10-12
"The disciples said to him, 'If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.' But he said to them, 'Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.'"

- 1 Corinthians 7:17
"Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches."

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### Observation Questions

1. In 1 Corinthians 7:7-9, what does Paul call both singleness and marriage? How does he describe their source?
2. According to Matthew 19:10-12, what are the three categories of singleness that Jesus mentions?
3. In the sermon, what are some reasons given for why singleness is not a “consolation prize” or a lesser calling? [[41:29]]
4. What does 1 Corinthians 7:17 say about how we should view our current season of life?

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### Interpretation Questions

1. Why do you think Paul refers to both singleness and marriage as “gifts” from God? What does this say about God’s view of each? [[42:01]]
2. How does Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 19 challenge cultural assumptions about marriage and singleness? [[43:08]]
3. The sermon says, “Our identity is not found in our marital status, but in our redemptive status as beloved children of God.” What does this mean for how we see ourselves and others? [[01:01:00]]
4. The pastor mentioned that contentment and desire can coexist. How is it possible to desire marriage and still be content in singleness? [[01:02:48]]

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### Application Questions

1. The sermon challenged the idea that singleness is a “waiting room” for something better. If you are single, do you ever feel this way? If you are married, have you ever unintentionally made someone feel this way? How can we change our thinking or actions? [[41:29]]
2. The pastor said, “God is not withholding something from you.” When you look at your own life, are there areas where you struggle to believe that God’s gifts and timing are good? How can you remind yourself of God’s faithfulness in those moments? [[59:07]]
3. The church is called to be a family for all, not defined by marital status. What is one practical way you can include someone from a different life stage in your community this month? [[01:04:15]]
4. The sermon asked, “What are the gifts unique to my season, and am I leveraging them for my single purpose?” What is one gift or opportunity you have right now that you could use to serve others or advance God’s kingdom? [[01:04:57]]
5. Susan’s testimony highlighted a life surrendered to Christ, regardless of marital status. What does surrender look like for you in your current season? Is there an area you need to trust God with more fully? [[56:24]]
6. The pastor said, “Contentment in Christ does not require the denial of desire, but it does call us to trust Him with those desires and not let them control us.” Is there a desire in your life that you need to surrender to God’s timing? How can you do that practically? [[01:02:48]]
7. Our hope and fulfillment are ultimately found in Christ. What is one way you can anchor your identity more deeply in Christ this week, rather than in your relationship status or achievements? [[01:01:00]]

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Closing Prayer Suggestion:
Ask God to help each person in the group see their current season as a gift, to trust His timing, and to use their unique opportunities to serve and love others for His glory.

Devotional

Day 1: Singleness and Marriage Are Both Gifts from God
God, in His wisdom, bestows both singleness and marriage as gifts, each according to His divine purpose for our lives. Neither status is inherently more spiritual or valuable than the other; what matters is how we steward the season God has given us. Whether single for a time or for life, or married, each person is called to honor God with their circumstances, trusting that He knows what is best and that His gifts are always good. Embracing this truth frees us from comparison and allows us to live with gratitude and purpose, knowing that our worth is not determined by our relationship status but by our identity in Christ. [42:17]

1 Corinthians 7:7-9 (ESV)
"I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion."

Reflection: In what ways have you viewed singleness or marriage as less than God’s best? How can you thank God today for the specific season He has given you right now?

Day 2: Leveraging Your Life for the Kingdom of Heaven
The single purpose for every follower of Christ—regardless of marital status—is to leverage their life for the sake of the kingdom of heaven, making much of Christ. This calling transcends our circumstances and invites us to use our unique gifts, time, and opportunities to serve God and others. When we root our identity in Christ and His mission, we find meaning and fulfillment that is not dependent on earthly relationships but on our relationship with Him and our participation in His work. [52:26]

Matthew 6:33 (ESV)
"But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you."

Reflection: What is one practical way you can use your current season—whether single or married—to serve God’s kingdom and make much of Christ this week?

Day 3: Contentment and Desire Can Coexist
Contentment in Christ does not require the denial of godly desires, such as the desire for marriage. It is possible to long for something and yet remain deeply satisfied in God’s goodness and provision in your present circumstances. True contentment sees the goodness of God in every season, trusting that He is not withholding anything good and that His love is enough. This perspective allows us to live with hope and peace, even as we bring our desires honestly before God. [01:02:48]

Philippians 4:11-13 (ESV)
"Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me."

Reflection: What desire are you holding before God today, and how can you practice contentment in Christ even as you wait for His timing or answer?

Day 4: Your Identity Is Found in Christ, Not Marital Status
Our true identity is not defined by whether we are single or married, but by our redemptive status in Christ. God’s love for us is perfect and unchanging, and He calls us beloved, chosen, and wanted. In Christ, we find deep, satisfying intimacy and belonging that no earthly relationship can fully provide. When we root our sense of worth in God’s love and redemption, we are freed from the pressures and lies of culture and can live confidently in who He says we are. [01:01:45]

Ephesians 1:4-7 (ESV)
"Even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption to himself as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace."

Reflection: When you feel unwanted or less-than, how can you remind yourself of your identity in Christ and the perfect love He has for you?

Day 5: Engage Fully in the Body of Christ
No matter your season of life, God calls you to active participation in the body of Christ. Singleness or marriage should not limit your involvement or sense of belonging in the church family. Each person is uniquely gifted and needed, and community flourishes when we cross generational and life-stage lines to encourage, serve, and build one another up. By prioritizing our relationship with God and investing in His people, we reflect the unity and love of Christ to the world. [01:04:15]

1 Corinthians 7:17 (ESV)
"Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches."

Reflection: Who is one person—single or married—you can intentionally invite into your community or encourage in their walk with Christ this week?

Quotes

A single Sunday morning could never suffice to cover a topic like singleness. However, it's my hope that today opens channels of communication for us as a church family that help us grow and build an understanding around what I've heard termed a theology of singleness. [00:39:52]

If theology itself is the study of the nature of God, who God is, his character and attributes, a theology of singleness, could be viewed as how that specific season of life defined as singleness, whether temporary or permanent, how that season aids in or contributes to our understanding of who God is. [00:41:00]

Paul in 1 Corinthians 7 has a lot to say about that. All of which he undergurs with this idea that singleness is a gift. Some of you are sitting there thinking, Michael, it man, we got different definitions of the word gift because it sure doesn't feel like one. [00:41:29]

First, these words remind us that it is God who gifts us. And second, these words imply that both marriage and singleness are gifts from God. Be that permanent or for a season, both are a gift according to his divine purpose for each of our lives. [00:42:19]

At times in a western church context, we all too easily uh veer towards a view that links marriage in with a natural progression progression or a normative experience for individuals. We see kids moving from middle school to high school and before we know it, they're moving out to college or university, maybe a tech school, a gap year, a career. [00:45:06]

Paul makes it very clear there are some who for the sake of the kingdom for the sake of kingdom work will choose to remain single. And before we move on, one additional way that this third category might present itself. I came across this in a conversation and I believe that it's valuable for today. [00:45:41]

His instruction is to the Christ follower. And with that comes an assumption of celibacy defined as the conscious decision to abstain from sexual relationships prior to marriage. A principle being viewed as more and more radical in the hypersexualized hookup culture of today. [00:47:21]

Culture screams a lie that says you are incomplete without sexual experience or sexual expression. However, God's design for sex is within the context of marriage. Secular culture today views singleness as an opportunity to do whatever you want. Nothing holding you back, no commitments. [00:47:48]

Rather, we are called to live life surrendered. Let me say that one more time. We are called to live life surrendered. Now, in a room this size, I recognize that uh it's likely there are people here who that has not been your experience. [00:48:36]

But regardless of whether you are single or married, older generation or younger generation, denying ourselves, living lives surrendered to Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit includes the denial of fleshly desires. [00:49:22]

Neither marriage nor singleness is inherently more spiritual than the other. What matters most is submitting to God's specific purpose for each of our lives and to do so in a way that is honoring to him. [00:51:06]

Our single purpose should be to leverage our lives for the sake of the kingdom of heaven, making much of Christ. Listen to that again. Our single purpose should be to leverage our lives for the kingdom of heaven, making much of Christ. [00:52:18]

There have been plenty of seasons in my life. You talk about seasons, and I like that. Um, that you feel you don't feel like you're enough or you don't feel like you're um chosen. But the truth is is that nobody loves me like Jesus does. Amen. And that love is enough. [00:56:11]

God is not withholding something from you. In a podcast between Annie FD Downs and Ashley Anderson, Annie asks the question, why do you think it's so important that singles have their theology of singleness down? To which Ashley responds like this. [00:59:16]

Your identity is not found in a marital status, but rather your redemptive status. In my years of ministry, both here at Westover and overseas, I've known followers of Christ living out their singleness across a spectrum of ages. Some of whom are very content and still others who are discouraged and regularly wrestling. [01:01:00]

Don't let a status of single or married limit your involvement in the body of Christ. Singles don't isolate yourself. Likewise, married couples and those with kids, singles like a good background bar backyard barbecue, too. Just because they aren't married or don't have kids, that doesn't mean you can't invite them into your community. [01:04:15]

Chatbot

What is the biblical view of singleness as a gift?

How does singleness deepen understanding of God's character?

In what ways can believers leverage their season for kingdom purpose?