Embracing Peace: The Power of Trying Softer

 

Summary

Learning to live one day at a time with God involves anchoring our lives with a simple, memorable thought: "Try Softer." This concept, though counterintuitive, can transform our approach to life. Often, we equate success with trying harder, exerting more effort, and striving for control. However, this relentless pursuit can lead to exhaustion and ineffectiveness. The idea of trying softer invites us to release the need for control and embrace a more relaxed, natural state of being.

The story of a painter who accidentally achieved his desired effect by throwing a sponge at his canvas illustrates this principle. His success came not from intense effort but from letting go. Similarly, in various aspects of life—whether in sports, music, or relationships—trying harder can sometimes hinder rather than help. The key is to recognize when effort becomes counterproductive and to shift towards a softer approach.

Jesus' teachings in Matthew 11:28-30 offer profound insight into this concept. He invites those who are weary and burdened to take on His yoke, which is easy and light. This yoke is not about ceasing work but about finding a way to engage with life that is sustainable and fulfilling. Jesus' yoke involves transformation from within, relying on God's power rather than our own. It begins with surrender, acknowledging that we cannot do it all on our own.

A yoke, traditionally used for a pair of oxen, symbolizes partnership. Jesus, the good carpenter, knows how to balance the load, bearing the heavier weight Himself. This partnership allows us to relax, knowing we are not alone in our struggles. The morning prayer from Alcoholics Anonymous encapsulates this idea, asking God to direct our thinking away from self-centeredness and towards peace and ease.

In our daily lives, trying softer means approaching our relationship with God, time management, and relationships with a sense of ease. It means letting go of the need to control every aspect and allowing things to unfold naturally. By trying softer, we align ourselves with the easy yoke of Jesus, finding rest and renewal in His presence.

Key Takeaways:

- The concept of "Try Softer" challenges the notion that more effort always leads to better results. Sometimes, releasing control and relaxing can lead to greater effectiveness and peace. [04:51]

- Jesus' invitation to take on His easy yoke is about transformation from within, relying on God's power rather than our own. This begins with surrender and acknowledging our limitations. [11:24]

- A yoke symbolizes partnership, and Jesus, as the good carpenter, bears the heavier weight. This allows us to relax, knowing we are not alone in our struggles. [12:31]

- Trying softer involves approaching our relationship with God, time management, and relationships with a sense of ease, letting go of the need to control every aspect. [13:37]

- Embracing the easy yoke of Jesus means finding rest and renewal in His presence, allowing things to unfold naturally and aligning ourselves with His peace. [14:03]

Youtube Chapters:

- [00:00] - Welcome
- [03:34] - One Simple Thought
- [03:46] - Personal Story of Striving
- [04:22] - Advice to Try Softer
- [05:33] - The Illusion of Control
- [05:45] - The Painter's Lesson
- [06:23] - Diminishing Returns of Effort
- [07:06] - The Age of Disordered Will
- [08:17] - The Picture of Grace
- [08:30] - Jesus' Invitation to Rest
- [09:25] - The Yoke of Jesus
- [10:12] - Everyone Has a Yoke
- [11:24] - Transformation from Within
- [12:31] - Partnership with Jesus
- [13:13] - Applying Try Softer in Life

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide

Bible Reading:
- Matthew 11:28-30

Observation Questions:
1. What does Jesus promise to those who are weary and burdened in Matthew 11:28-30?
2. How does the sermon describe the concept of "Try Softer" in relation to effort and control? [04:22]
3. What is the significance of the yoke in Jesus' teaching, and how is it described in the sermon? [09:25]
4. Can you identify a story or example from the sermon that illustrates the idea of achieving success by letting go of intense effort? [05:45]

Interpretation Questions:
1. How does the concept of "Try Softer" challenge the traditional view of success through hard work and effort? [04:51]
2. In what ways does Jesus' invitation to take on His yoke offer a different approach to dealing with life's burdens?
3. How does the sermon suggest that trying softer can lead to transformation from within, according to Jesus' teachings? [11:24]
4. What does the partnership symbolized by the yoke imply about our relationship with Jesus and our struggles? [12:31]

Application Questions:
1. Reflect on a time when trying harder led to exhaustion rather than success. How might trying softer have changed the outcome? [04:39]
2. In what areas of your life are you currently striving for control? How can you practice letting go and allowing things to unfold naturally this week? [05:20]
3. How can you incorporate the idea of "Try Softer" into your daily routine, especially in your relationship with God and time management? [13:37]
4. Consider a relationship where you feel the need to manage or control the other person. What steps can you take to release that control and embrace a more relaxed approach? [13:49]
5. Jesus offers rest for the weary. What practical steps can you take to accept His invitation and find rest in His presence this week? [08:42]
6. Identify a specific area in your life where you can rely more on God's power rather than your own. What changes will you make to surrender and trust Him more? [11:24]
7. How can you remind yourself daily of the partnership you have with Jesus, knowing He bears the heavier weight in your struggles? [12:31]

Devotional

Day 1: Embrace the Power of Letting Go
Releasing control and relaxing can lead to greater effectiveness and peace. The concept of "Try Softer" challenges the common belief that more effort always leads to better results. In many areas of life, such as sports, music, or relationships, trying harder can sometimes hinder rather than help. The key is to recognize when effort becomes counterproductive and to shift towards a softer approach. This involves letting go of the need for control and embracing a more relaxed, natural state of being. By doing so, we open ourselves to new possibilities and allow things to unfold in their own time. [04:51]

"For thus said the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, 'In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.' But you were unwilling." (Isaiah 30:15, ESV)

Reflection: What is one area of your life where you are striving too hard? How can you practice letting go and trusting God to guide you today?


Day 2: Surrender to Divine Transformation
Jesus' invitation to take on His easy yoke is about transformation from within, relying on God's power rather than our own. This begins with surrender and acknowledging our limitations. When we accept that we cannot do it all on our own, we open ourselves to the transformative power of God's grace. Jesus offers rest to those who are weary and burdened, inviting them to find a sustainable and fulfilling way to engage with life. By surrendering to His guidance, we allow His strength to work through us, leading to true transformation. [11:24]

"And he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." (2 Corinthians 12:9, ESV)

Reflection: What is one area of your life where you find yourself holding back from surrendering to Jesus? What would surrendering this area to Him actually look like in terms of daily habits?


Day 3: Partner with Jesus in Your Journey
A yoke symbolizes partnership, and Jesus, as the good carpenter, bears the heavier weight. This allows us to relax, knowing we are not alone in our struggles. The yoke of Jesus is not about ceasing work but about finding a way to engage with life that is sustainable and fulfilling. By partnering with Jesus, we can trust that He will balance the load, allowing us to find rest and renewal in His presence. This partnership invites us to rely on His strength and wisdom, rather than our own, as we navigate the challenges of life. [12:31]

"Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:29-30, ESV)

Reflection: How can you invite Jesus to be your partner in a specific struggle you are facing today? What would it look like to trust Him to carry the heavier weight?


Day 4: Approach Life with Ease and Trust
Trying softer involves approaching our relationship with God, time management, and relationships with a sense of ease, letting go of the need to control every aspect. By doing so, we align ourselves with the easy yoke of Jesus, finding rest and renewal in His presence. This approach encourages us to trust in God's timing and wisdom, allowing things to unfold naturally. By releasing the need for control, we create space for God's peace to fill our lives, leading to a more balanced and fulfilling existence. [13:37]

"Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday." (Psalm 37:5-6, ESV)

Reflection: What is one area of your life where you are trying to control the outcome? How can you practice trusting God to guide you and allow things to unfold naturally?


Day 5: Find Rest in the Presence of Jesus
Embracing the easy yoke of Jesus means finding rest and renewal in His presence, allowing things to unfold naturally and aligning ourselves with His peace. This involves letting go of the relentless pursuit of control and embracing a more relaxed, natural state of being. By doing so, we open ourselves to the transformative power of God's grace, allowing His strength to work through us. This rest is not about ceasing work but about finding a sustainable and fulfilling way to engage with life, trusting in God's guidance and wisdom. [14:03]

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." (Matthew 11:28-29, ESV)

Reflection: How can you create space in your daily routine to rest in the presence of Jesus? What practices can you incorporate to align yourself with His peace and allow His strength to work through you?

Quotes

"Sometimes trying harder, more strain, more effort, more work just begins to feel contrived and not be effective anymore and you're not at your best, you're not relaxed, you're not natural. If trying harder is not getting you where you want to go, try softer." [00:04:33]

"Uh, what exhausts us is not effort. The capacity for effort is a good thing. What exhausts us is when we try to control what we are actually not able to control." [00:06:42]

"Jesus says, come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke on you and learn for me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light." [00:08:45]

"Jesus was a good carpenter. You get into the yoke with him. See, that's the thing. That's what makes his yoke easy. I don't bear it on my own and neither do you. He bears the heaviest weight, and that's why I don't have to go through life with my teeth clenched and my brow furrowed." [00:12:23]

"Help me to relax and take it easy. Almost every morning when I say those words, I think, oh, that's just what I need. So today, try softer." [00:13:08]

"When it comes to your relationship with God, don't try harder to have more faith. Remember when I fainted twice real early on when I was preaching, so many people would say just try harder to trust God. You ever try harder to have more faith? Try softer." [00:13:15]

"Today with your time, don't try harder to get more done faster. Try softer. You can't control time. You can't control the traffic. Let's try softer." [00:13:38]

"Today in your relationships, instead of trying to manage and control everybody around you, your friends, your relatives, your parents, your kids, your spouse, your ex, your whoever, today let them be them. Let them worry about that. Try softer." [00:13:45]

"Today at work, instead of obsessing over that email, that project, that, try softer. That's the easy yoke. That's your day-to-day, one day at a time." [00:14:03]

"Leslie Farmer is a brilliant psychiatrist who wrote that we live in the age of disordered will, and Farber said when it comes to the will, there are two arenas of life, two realms. There are objects that we are able to control directly by choosing. There are acts that we can make happen by willing them." [00:07:00]

"There are goals, there are trajectories, there are outcomes that we would like to enter into, and we cannot control them by our will. We can will knowledge, he said, but not wisdom. I can will going to bed but not going to sleep." [00:07:25]

"William James noted over a century ago, it's such a strange thing that there'll be certain endeavors, like when there's a name that you're trying to remember and you can't remember, and you try and try and try super hard, and the harder you try, the more frustrated you get, and then when you give up, it just comes to you." [00:08:01]

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Transcript
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