Embracing Holistic Self-Care in Ministry
Summary
In today's message, I shared my personal journey through self-care, emphasizing its critical importance for those in ministry. Self-care isn't about indulgence but about nurturing four key areas: spiritual health, emotional maturity, life connections, and family relationships. These elements are essential for maintaining a balanced and fulfilling life, especially for pastors and church leaders who often face unique challenges. My journey began with a traumatic event—a truck accident during a mission trip—that led to a period of depression and anxiety. Through therapy, I realized that my struggles were rooted in long-standing negative thought patterns. This revelation prompted me to focus on my mental and emotional health, which gradually transformed my perspective and brought hope for change.
As I worked on my emotional and mental well-being, I faced another challenge: my physical health. A severe health scare with type two diabetes forced me to confront my physical condition. By God's grace, I embarked on a journey to improve my physical health, which included losing weight and engaging in activities like Brazilian jiu-jitsu. This holistic approach to self-care—addressing mental, emotional, and physical health—brought about significant positive changes in my life, relationships, and ministry.
Despite reaching a healthy state, life threw another curveball with the need for open-heart surgery. However, the foundation of self-care I had built over the years helped me navigate this challenge with resilience. This experience reinforced the importance of being prepared for life's unexpected trials by prioritizing self-care. I founded "Kicking at the Darkness" to support pastors and church leaders in their journey toward emotional maturity, spiritual health, and strong life connections. My goal is to help others thrive personally and professionally, ensuring that the work for God does not overshadow the work of God within them.
Key Takeaways:
1. The Importance of Holistic Self-Care: Self-care is not about indulgence but about nurturing spiritual health, emotional maturity, life connections, and family relationships. These elements are crucial for maintaining balance and fulfillment, especially for those in ministry. [01:18]
2. Facing and Overcoming Long-Standing Struggles: Addressing deep-rooted negative thought patterns and emotional struggles is essential for personal growth. Therapy and self-reflection can lead to significant transformation and hope for change. [03:50]
3. The Interconnection of Mental, Emotional, and Physical Health: Our mental, emotional, and physical well-being are deeply intertwined. Improving one aspect can positively impact the others, leading to a more holistic and healthy life. [07:11]
4. Preparation for Life's Unexpected Trials: Building a foundation of self-care prepares us for life's challenges. When tragedy strikes, having a handle on our spiritual, emotional, and physical health can make recovery and moving forward more manageable. [08:22]
5. Supporting Others in Their Self-Care Journey: Helping others prioritize self-care is vital. By sharing our experiences and offering support, we can guide others toward emotional maturity, spiritual health, and strong life connections, ensuring they thrive in their personal and professional lives. [10:59]
Youtube Chapters:
[00:00] - Welcome
[01:18] - The Importance of Self-Care
[03:50] - Overcoming Emotional Struggles
[07:11] - Physical Health Challenges
[08:22] - Preparing for Life's Trials
[10:59] - Supporting Others in Self-Care
Study Guide
Bible Study Discussion Guide
Bible Reading:
1. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 - "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."
2. Philippians 4:6-7 - "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
3. 3 John 1:2 - "Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well."
Observation Questions:
1. What are the four key areas of self-care mentioned in the sermon, and why are they important for those in ministry? [00:00]
2. How did the speaker's truck accident during a mission trip impact his mental and emotional health? [01:18]
3. What steps did the speaker take to address his physical health after being diagnosed with type two diabetes? [03:50]
4. How did the speaker's foundation of self-care help him navigate the challenge of open-heart surgery? [07:11]
Interpretation Questions:
1. How does the concept of our bodies being temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20) relate to the speaker's emphasis on physical health?
2. In what ways can Philippians 4:6-7 provide comfort and guidance for someone dealing with anxiety and depression, as the speaker experienced? [01:18]
3. How might the speaker's journey toward emotional maturity reflect the prayer in 3 John 1:2 for overall well-being?
4. What does the speaker's story suggest about the importance of preparing for life's unexpected trials through self-care? [08:22]
Application Questions:
1. Reflect on the four areas of self-care: spiritual health, emotional maturity, life connections, and family relationships. Which area do you feel needs more attention in your life, and what steps can you take to nurture it? [00:00]
2. The speaker mentioned overcoming long-standing negative thought patterns. Are there any negative thought patterns in your life that you need to address? How might therapy or self-reflection help you in this process? [01:18]
3. Consider the interconnection of mental, emotional, and physical health. How can improving one aspect of your health positively impact the others? [03:50]
4. The speaker's journey included a severe health scare. How can you be proactive in addressing your physical health to prevent similar situations?
5. How can you support others in their self-care journey, as the speaker aims to do through "Kicking at the Darkness"? What practical steps can you take to encourage someone in your community? [10:59]
6. Reflect on a time when you faced an unexpected trial. How did your foundation of self-care (or lack thereof) impact your ability to navigate that challenge? [08:22]
7. The speaker emphasized the importance of not letting the work for God overshadow the work of God within us. How can you ensure that your personal and spiritual growth remains a priority in your life and ministry? [08:22]
Devotional
Day 1: Holistic Self-Care as a Spiritual Discipline
Self-care is not about indulgence but about nurturing spiritual health, emotional maturity, life connections, and family relationships. These elements are crucial for maintaining balance and fulfillment, especially for those in ministry. By focusing on these areas, individuals can create a foundation that supports their personal and professional lives. This approach to self-care is not a luxury but a necessity, particularly for those who are constantly giving of themselves in service to others. [01:18]
"Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul." (3 John 1:2, ESV)
Reflection: What specific steps can you take today to nurture your spiritual health, emotional maturity, life connections, and family relationships?
Day 2: Confronting and Transforming Negative Thought Patterns
Addressing deep-rooted negative thought patterns and emotional struggles is essential for personal growth. Therapy and self-reflection can lead to significant transformation and hope for change. By confronting these issues, individuals can break free from the chains of negativity and embrace a more positive and hopeful outlook on life. This process requires courage and commitment but can lead to profound personal growth and healing. [03:50]
"Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!" (Psalm 139:23-24, ESV)
Reflection: What negative thought pattern do you need to confront today, and how can you begin to transform it with God's help?
Day 3: The Interconnection of Mental, Emotional, and Physical Health
Our mental, emotional, and physical well-being are deeply intertwined. Improving one aspect can positively impact the others, leading to a more holistic and healthy life. By recognizing this interconnection, individuals can take a more comprehensive approach to their self-care, ensuring that they address all aspects of their well-being. This holistic approach can lead to greater overall health and fulfillment. [07:11]
"Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him. For God's temple is holy, and you are that temple." (1 Corinthians 3:16-17, ESV)
Reflection: How can you take a step today to improve one aspect of your health, knowing it will positively affect the others?
Day 4: Building Resilience for Life's Unexpected Trials
Building a foundation of self-care prepares us for life's challenges. When tragedy strikes, having a handle on our spiritual, emotional, and physical health can make recovery and moving forward more manageable. By prioritizing self-care, individuals can build resilience and be better equipped to face whatever life throws their way. This preparation is not just about surviving but thriving in the face of adversity. [08:22]
"Therefore, let those who suffer according to God's will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good." (1 Peter 4:19, ESV)
Reflection: What is one area of your self-care routine that you can strengthen today to better prepare for future challenges?
Day 5: Supporting Others in Their Self-Care Journey
Helping others prioritize self-care is vital. By sharing our experiences and offering support, we can guide others toward emotional maturity, spiritual health, and strong life connections, ensuring they thrive in their personal and professional lives. This support can be a powerful force for good, helping others to achieve balance and fulfillment in their own lives. [10:59]
"Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ." (Galatians 6:2, ESV)
Reflection: Who in your life can you support today in their self-care journey, and how can you offer them encouragement and guidance?
Quotes
Self-care is what you need in order to attend to your spiritual and emotional needs so that you can be present in your life and with your family. That's really what self-care is all about. I want to share with you in this video my journey through self-care, my journey and what it took for me to focus on these things. I went through some of the darkest times of my life. [00:00:54]
I had to really take an inward look and say, okay, am I going to get emotionally mature? Am I going to take a hold of my emotions, of my thoughts, of my behaviors? Am I going to really give those things over to God and let him change me and transform me? And so by the grace of God, I began focusing on my mental and emotional health. And it made all the difference for me. [00:03:08]
All those times where you tell people, hey, your emotions and your mental life, what you think about and how you live in your body, all of those things are intertwined. Well, it turns out it's true. It really is true. And so I began to focus on my health. I'd gotten healthy on the inside. Now I was working to get healthy on the outside. I lost some weight. I started joining a gym. [00:04:27]
If tragedy strikes you and you don't have a handle, even just the smallest handle on some of those things, then your recovery, your road forward is going to be difficult. You're going to feel so stuck if you don't have a handle on those things moving forward. And so that's why I started kicking at the darkness. I want to help pastors just like you. [00:07:24]
The night before my heart surgery, this is what I wrote. I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason and that no experience or event is wasted. Everything before is preparation. Everything in the moment is refinement. Everything that will happen is for God's glory. [00:08:00]
The work that you do for God in a church should not destroy the work of God in you. [00:08:22]
I want to be able to come alongside of you and help you whether it's focusing on your spiritual health maybe you need some sort of spiritual direction you need somebody that will listen to you and to pray with you to help you set some spiritual goals maybe you need some help moving towards emotional maturity. [00:08:31]
Maybe for you, you need to learn how to build friends. You need some help connecting with others. You need some ideas and some encouragement to go out and to make friends, to revive old friendships, to find men and women outside of your church construct that just expect you just to be their friend. They don't expect anything else from you except just to be a friend. [00:09:06]
I want you to connect with me and find out what I can do or how I can help you through one-on-one coaching, maybe coming in and doing some team teaching with your church team and your leadership. Maybe it's coming alongside of you and leading a retreat to help you focus on determining your vision and values for your personal life or for the life of your church. [00:09:41]
If there's somebody you know that could use some hope, clarity, and strength that could benefit from hearing my story and what God was able to do, how he was able to meet me in all of those areas, share that with them. [00:10:21]
I am Michael. Kicking at the Darkness is here to help you get hope, clarity, and strength for your life and for your ministry. Whatever I can do to help you, I want to do so. Peace. We'll see you next time. [00:11:03]