Embracing Holiness: God's Design for Sexuality
Summary
In a world saturated with messages about sex, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, confused, or even discouraged about what it means to honor God with our bodies. Yet, God’s will for us is clear: He desires our sanctification—our growth in holiness—especially in the area of sexuality. This call is not rooted in arbitrary rules or a desire to rob us of joy, but in the loving wisdom of our Creator, who knows what is truly good for us. God’s design for sex is beautiful, life-giving, and meant to be enjoyed within the covenant of marriage between a man and a woman. Anything outside of this, the Bible calls sexual immorality, and it ultimately leads us away from God’s best.
The culture of Paul’s day was not so different from ours—sexuality was everywhere, and the boundaries were loose. Yet, Paul calls believers to a radically different standard: to control our bodies in holiness and honor, not simply to avoid consequences, but to reflect the very character of God. This is not a call to mere self-discipline for its own sake, but to a life that brings glory to God and good to others. Sexual sin is not just a private matter; it harms others, devalues people made in God’s image, and violates the command to love our neighbor as ourselves.
God’s call to holiness is not a burden we carry alone. He gives us His Holy Spirit, who empowers us to resist temptation, to grow in self-control, and to pursue purity. We are not left to fight this battle in our own strength. The Spirit is our helper, our advocate, and our source of hope. When we fail, we are not cast out; instead, we are invited to run to our Father for help, forgiveness, and restoration. This journey is not meant to be walked in isolation. We need each other—to encourage, to hold accountable, and to remind one another of the hope and power we have in Christ.
Ultimately, God’s standard for sexuality is not about restriction, but about embracing the fullness of life He intends for us. By submitting to His purposes, we find true freedom, joy, and the ability to reflect His holiness in a world desperate for something real and good.
Key Takeaways
- God’s will for us is sanctification—a life that increasingly reflects His holiness, especially in how we use our bodies. This is not about legalism or shame, but about becoming more like Jesus, the best and truest version of ourselves. God’s commands are rooted in His love and wisdom, always seeking our good. [39:19]
- Sexual immorality is not just a private issue; it harms others and distorts the value of people made in God’s image. Even lust degrades another person, reducing them to an object rather than honoring their dignity. True love for our neighbor means pursuing purity, not just for our own sake, but for theirs as well. [52:51]
- Holiness is not achieved by sheer willpower; it is empowered by the Holy Spirit. God does not leave us to fight temptation alone—He gives us Himself, working in us to produce self-control and transformation. Our hope is not in our own strength, but in the Spirit who is always present and able. [01:06:42]
- The call to sexual purity is a community effort, not a solitary struggle. We need safe, honest relationships where we can confess, encourage, and hold each other accountable. Being part of the body of Christ means both seeking help when we struggle and being a trustworthy friend to others who do. [01:03:27]
- When we fail, the gospel invites us to run to our Father, not hide in shame. God’s grace is sufficient, and His desire is to restore, not condemn. The journey toward holiness is marked by repentance, dependence on God, and the assurance that He is with us every step of the way. [59:35]
Youtube Chapters
[00:00] - Welcome
[00:45] - Announcements and Giving Update
[02:43] - C.S. Lewis Author Spotlight
[04:30] - Invitation to 101 Class
[05:20] - Opening Prayer
[30:51] - Turning to God’s Word
[32:16] - Sex in Culture: Then and Now
[34:26] - Why Address Sexuality Directly?
[37:06] - The Big Idea: Holiness and the Body
[38:09] - God’s Will: Sanctification and Sexuality
[41:44] - God’s Good Design for Sex
[44:32] - Learning Self-Control in Holiness and Honor
[48:22] - Faith Changes Our Perspective
[52:51] - Sexual Sin Harms Others
[54:44] - The Seriousness of Sin and God’s Warnings
[57:29] - Called to Holiness as God’s Children
[59:35] - Grace When We Fail
[01:01:06] - Practical Steps for Purity
[01:03:27] - Community and Accountability
[01:06:42] - The Hope of the Holy Spirit
[01:09:24] - Closing Prayer and Invitation
Study Guide
Bible Study Discussion Guide
---
### Bible Reading
1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 (ESV)
For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.
Matthew 5:27-30 (ESV)
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.”
---
### Observation Questions
1. According to 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8, what is God’s will for believers when it comes to sexuality?
2. What does Paul say is the difference between how believers and “the Gentiles who do not know God” approach their bodies and sexuality?
3. In Matthew 5:27-30, how does Jesus expand the definition of sexual sin beyond just physical actions?
4. The sermon mentions that sexual immorality is not just a private matter but harms others. What examples does the pastor give of how sexual sin can hurt another person? [[52:51]]
---
### Interpretation Questions
1. Why does Paul connect sanctification (growing in holiness) so closely with how we use our bodies? What does this say about the importance of our physical lives in following Jesus? [[39:19]]
2. The sermon says that God’s commands about sexuality are not about robbing us of joy, but about seeking our good. How does this perspective challenge or affirm your own view of God’s rules? [[41:44]]
3. The pastor points out that even lustful thoughts degrade another person and are considered sin. Why do you think Jesus takes inner thoughts so seriously? [[52:51]]
4. The sermon emphasizes that holiness is not achieved by willpower alone, but by the Holy Spirit’s help. What does it look like, practically, to rely on the Holy Spirit in this area? [[01:06:42]]
---
### Application Questions
1. The sermon says that God’s will is for us to become more like Jesus, especially in how we use our bodies. What is one area of your life where you feel God is calling you to grow in holiness? What would a first step look like? [[39:19]]
2. The pastor talked about the need to “fight tooth and nail” against sexual sin and not just give up. Are there specific triggers or situations that make it harder for you to pursue purity? What guardrails or changes could you put in place this week? [[01:01:06]]
3. The message highlighted that sexual sin is not just about us—it can harm others and devalue people made in God’s image. How might this truth change the way you think about your choices, both online and in person? [[52:51]]
4. The sermon encouraged us to see the pursuit of purity as a community effort, not a solo struggle. Do you have someone you can be honest with about this area of your life? If not, what would it take to build that kind of relationship? [[01:03:27]]
5. When you fail, the gospel invites you to run to God for help and forgiveness, not hide in shame. How do you usually respond when you mess up? What would it look like to run to God instead of away from Him? [[59:35]]
6. The pastor said that God gives us His Holy Spirit to empower us for holiness. Can you think of a time when you sensed God helping you resist temptation or change your desires? How can you invite the Spirit’s help more intentionally this week? [[01:06:42]]
7. The sermon mentioned that God’s design for sex is beautiful and life-giving within marriage. How does this positive vision of sexuality challenge or encourage you compared to what you hear from culture? [[41:44]]
---
Devotional
Day 1: God’s Will Is Our Sanctification and Holiness
God’s desire for His people is that they become more like Him, reflecting His character and nature in every area of life—including sexuality. True holiness is not about following arbitrary rules, but about embracing God’s best for us, trusting that His design leads to our flourishing. When we pursue sanctification, we are not just avoiding sin, but actively growing into the likeness of Jesus, the best version of ourselves. God’s will is not to restrict us, but to set us free to live in a way that is truly good, beautiful, and life-giving. [39:19]
1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 (ESV):
“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.”
Reflection: In what area of your life do you sense God calling you to deeper holiness, and how might you take one concrete step today to pursue that sanctification?
Day 2: Sexual Immorality Harms Others and Violates Love
Sexual sin is not just a private matter; it always impacts others, whether directly or indirectly. When we engage in sexual immorality, we harm those involved by reducing them to objects and failing to love them as God commands. Even lustful thoughts degrade the value of another person, violating the call to love our neighbor as ourselves. God’s standard is not meant to shame us, but to protect us and those around us from the deep wounds that sin can cause. [53:54]
Matthew 5:27-30 (ESV):
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.”
Reflection: Is there a relationship or situation where your thoughts or actions have failed to honor another person’s dignity? What step can you take today to restore love and respect in that area?
Day 3: Faith Transforms How We View and Use Our Bodies
Knowing God changes everything, including how we see and treat our bodies. Our faith should radically alter our perspectives, leading us to honor God with our bodies rather than following the passions and patterns of the world. We are called to self-control, not just for our own sake, but as a testimony to God’s transforming power in our lives. When we remember that our bodies belong to God, we are motivated to use them in ways that bring Him glory and reflect His holiness. [48:22]
Romans 12:1-2 (ESV):
“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
Reflection: What is one practical way you can honor God with your body today, resisting the pull of cultural norms and instead living out your faith?
Day 4: We Need Community and Accountability in Pursuing Holiness
Pursuing holiness is not a solo endeavor; God has given us the church and fellow believers to encourage, support, and hold us accountable. Bringing struggles into the light and seeking help from trusted brothers or sisters breaks the power of shame and isolation. We are called to be safe people for others, willing to have honest conversations and offer grace and truth as we all strive for God’s standard together. [01:04:12]
James 5:16 (ESV):
“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”
Reflection: Who is one trusted person you can reach out to for support or accountability in your pursuit of holiness, or how can you become a safe person for someone else to share their struggles?
Day 5: The Holy Spirit Empowers Us to Live Holy Lives
God does not leave us to fight temptation and pursue holiness on our own; He gives us His Holy Spirit to empower, guide, and comfort us. The Spirit is our helper, enabling us to resist sin, grow in self-control, and experience hope even when we fall short. We are not abandoned in our struggle—God Himself is with us, working in us to will and to act according to His good purpose. This truth fills us with hope and courage to keep pressing on. [01:06:42]
Galatians 5:22-25 (ESV):
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit.”
Reflection: In what area of your life do you most need the Spirit’s help today, and how can you invite Him to empower you in that specific struggle or temptation?
Quotes