Embracing Holiness: God's Design for Sexuality

In a world saturated with messages about sex, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, confused, or even burdened by the topic. Yet, God’s Word speaks directly and clearly into this area of our lives, not to shame or restrict us, but to invite us into a life that reflects His holiness and brings true flourishing. God’s will for each of us is sanctification—becoming more like Jesus in every aspect, including our sexuality. This means abstaining from sexual immorality, which the Bible defines as any sexual activity outside the covenant of marriage between a man and a woman. While this standard may seem narrow or even out of step with our culture, it is rooted in God’s deep knowledge of what is truly good for us.

God’s design for sex is not about denying pleasure, but about channeling it into the context where it brings life, intimacy, and joy without shame. The boundaries He sets are not arbitrary; they are for our protection and our good. When we step outside of these boundaries, we not only harm ourselves but also others, reducing people to objects and violating the call to love our neighbor as ourselves. Even private sins of lust or pornography have real consequences, both for our own souls and for the dignity of others.

But God does not leave us to struggle alone. He calls us to control our bodies in holiness and honor, not by sheer willpower, but by the power of the Holy Spirit who dwells within us. Our faith should transform how we see and use our bodies, moving us from the patterns of the world to the likeness of Christ. This is not a solitary journey; we are called to walk together, supporting and encouraging one another in the pursuit of holiness. When we fail, we are not to run from God in shame, but to run to Him for help, forgiveness, and restoration.

Ultimately, God’s call to sexual holiness is an invitation to trust His wisdom, embrace His good design, and experience the hope and power that comes from His Spirit. He has not left us alone—He is with us, enabling us to live lives that are pleasing to Him and truly good for us.

Key Takeaways

• 1. God’s will for us is sanctification—becoming more like Jesus in every area, including our sexuality. This is not about legalism or mere rule-following, but about reflecting God’s character and experiencing the fullness of life He intends. Holiness is not a burden, but a pathway to true freedom and joy. [39:00]
• 2. Sexual immorality is not just a private matter; it distorts God’s good gift and harms both ourselves and others. Even when hidden, sexual sin devalues people and creates barriers in our relationship with God. Taking sin seriously means recognizing its real consequences and seeking God’s grace to walk in the light. [53:11]
• 3. Self-control is not achieved by sheer willpower, but by learning to rely on the Holy Spirit. God calls us to actively pursue mastery over our bodies, setting up guardrails and being honest about our triggers and weaknesses. True self-control is rooted in a desire to honor God and hear His commendation, not just to avoid negative outcomes. [44:45]
• 4. Our faith should radically transform how we view and use our bodies. Knowing God changes our perspective, just as new information changes how we see a story or a person. We are no longer to live as those who do not know God, but as beloved children who reflect His holiness in every aspect of life. [48:47]
• 5. We are not meant to fight this battle alone. God has given us His Spirit, His Word, and His people to help us pursue holiness. Community is essential—both for accountability and for encouragement. When we struggle, we are called to bring our battles into the light, seek help, and support one another in the journey toward hopeful, holy sexuality. [63:42]

Youtube Chapters

• [00:00] - Welcome
• [01:34] - Giving Campaign Update
• [04:43] - Opening Prayer
• [30:27] - Turning to God’s Word
• [32:16] - Sex in Culture: Then and Now
• [34:26] - Why Address Sexuality Directly
• [36:42] - God’s Will: Holiness and Sanctification
• [39:00] - God’s Design for Sex
• [41:28] - The Goodness and Boundaries of Sexuality
• [43:05] - Song of Solomon and God’s Gift
• [44:45] - Learning Self-Control
• [47:45] - Faith Transforms Our Perspective
• [51:12] - Sexual Sin Harms Others
• [54:18] - The Seriousness of Sin
• [57:08] - Called to Holiness as God’s Children
• [59:21] - Grace When We Fail
• [61:32] - Practical Steps for Purity
• [63:42] - The Role of Community
• [66:28] - The Hope of the Holy Spirit
• [69:32] - Closing Prayer and Invitation

Bible Reading

1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 (ESV) — For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.

Observation Questions

1. According to 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8, what is God’s will for believers regarding their sexuality?
2. How does Paul describe the difference between how believers and “the Gentiles who do not know God” approach their bodies and desires?
3. What reasons does Paul give for why sexual immorality is serious, both for ourselves and for others? ([53:11])
4. What does the passage say about the role of the Holy Spirit in helping us live out God’s standard? ([01:06:28])

Interpretation Questions

1. The sermon says God’s boundaries for sex are not about denying pleasure, but about channeling it for our good. Why might God’s design seem restrictive, and how does the sermon explain the purpose behind these boundaries? ([41:28])
2. The passage warns that sexual sin is not just a private matter. In what ways does sexual immorality harm both ourselves and others, even if it seems hidden? ([53:11])
3. The sermon emphasizes that self-control is not just about willpower, but about relying on the Holy Spirit. What does it look like to depend on the Spirit rather than just trying harder on our own? ([44:45])
4. The sermon says that when we fail, we should run to God for help, not away from Him in shame. How does this change the way we respond to our own struggles or failures? ([59:21])

Application Questions

1. The sermon says God’s will is for us to become more like Jesus in every area, including our sexuality. What is one area of your life where you sense God inviting you to greater holiness? What would it look like to take a step in that direction this week? ([39:00])
2. Are there specific situations, habits, or triggers that make it harder for you to practice self-control in this area? What practical guardrails could you set up to help you walk in holiness? ([01:02:20])
3. The sermon talks about the importance of community and not fighting this battle alone. Do you have someone you can be honest with about your struggles? If not, what would it take to find or become that kind of friend? ([01:03:42])
4. When you think about God’s boundaries for sex, do you see them as burdens or as gifts for your good? How might your perspective need to change to trust God’s wisdom in this area? ([41:28])
5. The sermon says that even private sins like lust or pornography have real consequences. How have you seen this play out in your own life or in the lives of others? What steps can you take to bring these struggles into the light? ([53:11])
6. The pastor said, “The gospel is not, ‘Oh no, I messed up. Dad’s going to kill me.’ It’s, ‘Oh no, I messed up. I need Dad’s help.’” How does this view of God affect your willingness to seek forgiveness and restoration when you fail? ([59:21])
7. The Holy Spirit is given to help us, not just to give us rules. What is one way you can invite the Holy Spirit’s help this week in your thoughts, actions, or relationships? ([01:06:28])