Embracing Grief: Finding Hope in Our Pain

 

Summary

### Summary

In today's sermon, we revisited the theme of grief, a topic that many of us have been grappling with since the beginning of the year. We started by recalling the exercise from January where we wrote down what we wanted to leave behind, and grief was a significant theme among the responses. Grief is not just about mourning the death of a loved one; it can also be about the loss of friendships, relationships, or even pets. Our culture often encourages us to hide our grief, to "suck it up" and move on quickly, but this is not healthy.

We explored the book of Lamentations, particularly chapter three, where the prophet Jeremiah expresses his deep anguish and anger towards God. Jeremiah's raw and honest lament shows us that God can handle our pain and anger. It's a reminder that grief is not supposed to be pretty, and we shouldn't try to overspiritualize it or gloss over it with clichés.

I shared personal stories of loss, including the death of a close friend and a youth group member, to illustrate how grief can be overwhelming and how important it is to be honest about our pain. We also discussed the importance of community in grieving, emphasizing that we should be able to come to church and be messy, genuine, and real about our struggles.

Jeremiah's lament eventually turns to hope as he recalls God's faithfulness and love. This shift teaches us that in our grief, we need to rely on what we know about God, not just how we feel. God’s promises and His presence are our foundation. We need to bring our grief to Christ, who understands our pain and offers us rest and healing.

### Key Takeaways

1. Grief is Multifaceted and Personal: Grief is not limited to the loss of a loved one; it can encompass the end of relationships, friendships, or even the loss of a pet. Each person's grief is unique and deeply personal, and it's important to acknowledge and process it rather than suppress it. [03:37]

2. God Can Handle Our Anger and Pain: Jeremiah's raw and honest lament in Lamentations 3 shows that God can handle our deepest pain and anger. We don't need to hide our emotions from Him. Instead, we should bring our genuine feelings to God, knowing that He understands and can provide comfort. [10:07]

3. Community in Grief: Grieving should not be a solitary process. We need to be able to come to our church community and be honest about our struggles. Sharing our pain with others and allowing them to support us is crucial for healing. [15:09]

4. Rely on What You Know, Not How You Feel: In the midst of grief, it's essential to rely on the truths we know about God rather than our fluctuating emotions. Jeremiah's shift from despair to hope in Lamentations 3 reminds us that God's love and faithfulness are constant, even when we don't feel it. [17:56]

5. Jesus Understands Our Grief: Jesus experienced grief and loss during His time on earth. He wept for Lazarus, grieved the loss of His cousin John the Baptist, and understood the pain of losing a parent. Knowing that Jesus has walked through grief gives us comfort and assurance that He understands our pain and is with us in it. [34:33]

### YouTube Chapters

[0:00] - Welcome
[01:12] - Introduction to Grief
[02:23] - Different Forms of Grief
[03:37] - Personal Stories of Loss
[04:49] - Cultural Attitudes Towards Grief
[06:09] - God's Understanding of Our Pain
[07:28] - Prayer and Introduction to Lamentations
[08:46] - Jeremiah's Lament
[10:07] - God's Response to Our Anger
[11:29] - The Reality of Grief
[12:35] - Personal Experience with Grief
[15:09] - The Importance of Community
[16:33] - Jeremiah's Glimmer of Hope
[17:56] - Relying on God's Truth
[19:07] - The Role of Listening in Healing
[20:12] - Supporting Others in Grief
[22:29] - Building on a Firm Foundation
[23:46] - The Presence of Jesus in Our Grief
[25:04] - Jesus' Evidence of Love
[26:19] - The Hope of Resurrection
[27:37] - The Process of Grieving
[29:01] - Fixing Our Eyes on Eternity
[30:31] - Preparing for New Life
[31:57] - Addressing the Grief Grubs
[33:15] - The Duration of Grief
[34:33] - Jesus' Experience with Grief
[36:09] - Finding Rest in God's Promises
[37:26] - Closing Prayer

Study Guide

### Bible Study Discussion Guide

#### Bible Reading
- Lamentations 3:1-24
- Isaiah 49:15-16
- 1 Thessalonians 4:13-14

#### Observation Questions
1. What are some different forms of grief mentioned in the sermon? ([03:37])
2. How does Jeremiah describe his feelings towards God in Lamentations 3? ([08:46])
3. What shift occurs in Jeremiah's lament in Lamentations 3:18-24? ([16:33])
4. How did Jesus demonstrate His understanding of grief according to the sermon? ([34:33])

#### Interpretation Questions
1. Why is it significant that Jeremiah's lament in Lamentations 3 includes such raw and honest expressions of anger towards God? ([10:07])
2. How does the sermon suggest we should handle our grief differently from cultural norms? ([04:49])
3. What does it mean to rely on what we know about God rather than how we feel in times of grief? ([17:56])
4. How can the presence of Jesus and His promises provide comfort during times of grief? ([23:46])

#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on a time when you experienced grief. How did you handle it, and what might you do differently after hearing this sermon? ([03:37])
2. Have you ever felt like Jeremiah, expressing anger or frustration towards God? How did you process those feelings? ([08:46])
3. In what ways can you be more open and honest about your struggles within your church community? ([15:09])
4. How can you support someone in your life who is currently grieving? What practical steps can you take to be there for them? ([20:12])
5. What truths about God can you hold onto when your emotions are overwhelming? How can you remind yourself of these truths daily? ([17:56])
6. Jesus experienced grief and loss during His time on earth. How does knowing this impact your view of Him and your relationship with Him? ([34:33])
7. Identify any "grief grubs" in your life that might be hindering your growth. What steps can you take to address and heal from these hidden pains? ([31:57])

Devotional

Day 1: Grief is Multifaceted and Personal
Grief is a complex and deeply personal experience that extends beyond the loss of a loved one. It can encompass the end of relationships, friendships, or even the loss of a pet. Each person's grief is unique, and it is essential to acknowledge and process it rather than suppress it. Our culture often encourages us to hide our grief and move on quickly, but this is not healthy. Instead, we should allow ourselves to feel and express our emotions genuinely.

Understanding that grief can take many forms helps us to be more compassionate towards ourselves and others. It is important to recognize that everyone grieves differently and that there is no "right" way to grieve. By acknowledging the multifaceted nature of grief, we can better support ourselves and those around us in their healing journeys. [03:37]

Lamentations 3:19-20 (ESV): "Remember my affliction and my wanderings, the wormwood and the gall! My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me."

Reflection: Think of a recent loss you have experienced, whether it be a relationship, friendship, or something else. How can you allow yourself to genuinely feel and process this grief today?


Day 2: God Can Handle Our Anger and Pain
Jeremiah's raw and honest lament in Lamentations 3 shows that God can handle our deepest pain and anger. We don't need to hide our emotions from Him. Instead, we should bring our genuine feelings to God, knowing that He understands and can provide comfort. Jeremiah's expression of anguish and anger towards God is a powerful reminder that our relationship with God can withstand our most intense emotions.

God invites us to come to Him with our pain, anger, and confusion. He is not afraid of our honesty and can provide the comfort and healing we need. By bringing our genuine feelings to God, we open ourselves up to His presence and allow Him to work in our lives. [10:07]

Psalm 13:1-2 (ESV): "How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?"

Reflection: What emotions have you been hiding from God? Take a moment to honestly express your feelings to Him in prayer today.


Day 3: Community in Grief
Grieving should not be a solitary process. We need to be able to come to our church community and be honest about our struggles. Sharing our pain with others and allowing them to support us is crucial for healing. The importance of community in grieving cannot be overstated, as it provides a space for us to be messy, genuine, and real about our struggles.

Being part of a supportive community helps us to feel less isolated in our grief. It allows us to lean on others for strength and comfort, and it also gives us the opportunity to support others in their times of need. By fostering a culture of openness and vulnerability within our church community, we can create a safe space for healing and growth. [15:09]

Galatians 6:2 (ESV): "Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."

Reflection: Who in your church community can you reach out to for support in your grief? How can you also be a source of support for someone else who is grieving?


Day 4: Rely on What You Know, Not How You Feel
In the midst of grief, it's essential to rely on the truths we know about God rather than our fluctuating emotions. Jeremiah's shift from despair to hope in Lamentations 3 reminds us that God's love and faithfulness are constant, even when we don't feel it. Our emotions can be overwhelming and misleading, but God's promises and His presence are our foundation.

By focusing on what we know to be true about God, we can find stability and hope in the midst of our pain. God's love, faithfulness, and promises are unchanging, and they provide a solid foundation for us to stand on during difficult times. Trusting in God's character and His Word helps us to navigate our grief with hope and assurance. [17:56]

Isaiah 40:31 (ESV): "But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."

Reflection: What truths about God can you hold onto today, even if your emotions are telling you otherwise? How can you remind yourself of these truths throughout the day?


Day 5: Jesus Understands Our Grief
Jesus experienced grief and loss during His time on earth. He wept for Lazarus, grieved the loss of His cousin John the Baptist, and understood the pain of losing a parent. Knowing that Jesus has walked through grief gives us comfort and assurance that He understands our pain and is with us in it. Jesus' empathy and compassion for our suffering are profound, and He offers us rest and healing.

By reflecting on Jesus' experiences with grief, we can find solace in knowing that He truly understands what we are going through. His presence in our lives provides comfort and hope, and we can lean on Him for strength and support. Jesus' example also encourages us to be compassionate and empathetic towards others who are grieving. [34:33]

Hebrews 4:15-16 (ESV): "For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

Reflection: How does knowing that Jesus understands your grief change the way you approach Him in prayer? How can you draw near to Him for comfort and support today?

Quotes

### Quotes for Outreach

1. "My goal is to give you hope today because I know there are a lot of people here that are grieving. Now, when I say grief, I'm sure most of you are thinking about just, you know, mourning a death. But there's a lot of things that we can grieve." [02:23] (15 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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2. "God can handle our hurt and God can handle our anger. And I'll tell you this, I'm so thankful that this passage exists and that we could talk about it. Because in times of grief, you know what Christians tend to do? Overspiritualize everything. Overspiritualize their pain and just kind of gloss over it." [11:29] (20 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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3. "When you are grieving, it's not enough to say like, yeah, the big guy upstairs or a higher power or God in some vague sense. Call him by name. Call out to Jesus and watch what happens because there is power in the name of Jesus." [16:33] (16 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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4. "Jesus has you engraved right here on his palms. There are wounds from the cross that are evident. There's evidence that you belong to him, evidence of his love for you. It's a constant reminder that God sees to think of you and to never leave you and to never forsake you." [25:04] (19 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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5. "Jesus gave away the ending to everything. He goes, I've already overcome the world. I win in the end and I'm sharing this victory with my kids. And when Jesus died on the cross and he rose again, he made a way where there is no way." [25:04] (18 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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### Quotes for Members

1. "This message is so important today because some of you are stuck in grief. You haven't moved forward. You haven't processed that pain. And this message is designed to help you think differently about your grief." [04:49] (12 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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2. "If you swallow your grief, you're going to make yourself sick. And some of you are doing that today. And it's more unhealthy than I can actually explain. Let me try. It's kind of like shaking up a can of Coke and you stick it in the freezer and you forget about it. And eventually what's going to happen is it's going to burst open and it's going to lead to some destruction in some other area in your life." [13:57] (22 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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3. "You need to rely on what you know, not how you feel. See, Jeremiah didn't write this because he saw it. All he saw was death and destruction. He didn't write it because he felt it. All he felt was pain and hopelessness. He wrote it because he knew it. He knew it was true." [17:56] (18 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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4. "When you are in that grief and people aren't being really kind to you, or they don't know what to say, I want you to know that God is going to draw near to you. And he's going to sit with you in that darkness. He's going to sit with you in that pain. He says, I will never leave you. I will never forsake you. And he's promised in his word that he's going to lead you through it." [22:29] (18 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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5. "You got to allow God to go into the deep recesses of your heart and remove those problems, remove that pain. And some of you have been grieving for a few months. Some of you, it's been years. It's been a long time and you're stuck in that pain." [31:57] (14 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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