Embracing God's Goodness in Singleness and Infertility

Summary

### Summary

Good morning, everyone. Today, we gathered to worship and to be equipped to reach our community with the love of Jesus. We prayed for our neighboring church, Spring Ridge Mennonite Church, asking God to empower them as they seek to reach their community. We then delved into a topic that is often stigmatized in the church: infertility and singleness. Society and the church often elevate marriage and children, which can leave those who are single or childless feeling isolated and envious.

We explored the idea that God is always good, even when our desires are unmet. Psalm 25:8 and Psalm 84:11 remind us that God is our guide and provider, withholding no good thing from those who walk uprightly. We discussed the importance of trusting God's timing and goodness, even when His answer is "wait" or "not now." Isaiah 56:3-5 assures us that God blesses those who commit their lives to Him, even if they feel like they lack what society values.

We also touched on the importance of being patient and persistent in prayer, using the parable of the persistent widow as an example. The Apostle Paul’s teachings in Romans 8:28 and his letters to the Corinthians emphasize that singleness and childlessness can be gifts that allow us to serve God without distraction.

We concluded with practical action steps for singles and those struggling with infertility: accept your current situation, remain celibate, get involved in community, and be still and know God. For those struggling with infertility, we encouraged them to grow closer to their spouse and look for opportunities to pour into the next generation. Ultimately, we are called to seek first the kingdom of God and trust that He will provide for our needs.

### Key Takeaways

1. God's Goodness in Unmet Desires: Trusting in God's goodness is crucial, even when our desires for marriage or children are unmet. Psalm 25:8 and Psalm 84:11 remind us that God is our guide and provider, and He withholds no good thing from those who walk uprightly. This means that if we are in a season of singleness or childlessness, it is part of God's good plan for us. [42:47]

2. Patience and Persistence in Prayer: The parable of the persistent widow teaches us the importance of being persistent in prayer. Even when God's answer is "wait" or "not now," we should continue to seek Him and trust in His timing. This persistence builds our faith and aligns our desires with God's will. [49:03]

3. The Gift of Singleness: The Apostle Paul emphasizes that singleness can be a gift that allows us to serve God without distraction. In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul explains that an unmarried person can focus more on the Lord's work. This perspective helps us see singleness not as a curse but as an opportunity for deeper devotion to God. [01:03:23]

4. Contentment in Current Circumstances: Finding contentment in our current situation is essential. Whether single or struggling with infertility, we can use this time to serve God wholeheartedly. Jesus' teaching in Matthew 6:33 encourages us to seek first the kingdom of God, trusting that He will provide for our needs. [57:12]

5. Community and Support: Getting involved in community and supporting others can bring fulfillment and purpose. For those struggling with infertility, pouring into the next generation through mentorship or volunteering can be incredibly rewarding. This not only helps others but also brings a sense of belonging and purpose. [01:11:46]

### YouTube Chapters

[0:00] - Welcome
[21:45] - Prayer for Spring Ridge Mennonite Church
[37:27] - Introduction: Desiring What We Don't Have
[38:08] - Stigmas in the Church
[39:11] - The Struggle of Singleness and Infertility
[40:24] - Purpose Beyond Marriage and Children
[41:33] - Trusting in God's Goodness
[42:47] - God is Always Good
[43:50] - The Prophet Isaiah's Encouragement
[46:20] - Persistence in Prayer
[49:03] - The Parable of the Persistent Widow
[50:21] - The Importance of Patience
[52:04] - Unequally Yoked Marriages
[54:19] - The Impact of Marriage Choices
[57:12] - Finding Contentment in Current Circumstances
[01:03:23] - The Gift of Singleness
[01:11:46] - Pouring into the Next Generation
[01:17:12] - Invitation to Accept Jesus
[01:20:20] - Closing Prayer and Potluck Instructions

Study Guide

### Bible Study Discussion Guide

#### Bible Reading
1. Psalm 25:8 - "Good and upright is the Lord; therefore he instructs sinners in his ways."
2. Psalm 84:11 - "For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless."
3. Isaiah 56:3-5 - "Let no foreigner who is bound to the Lord say, 'The Lord will surely exclude me from his people.' And let no eunuch complain, 'I am only a dry tree.' For this is what the Lord says: 'To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose what pleases me and hold fast to my covenant—to them I will give within my temple and its walls a memorial and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that will endure forever.'"

#### Observation Questions
1. According to Psalm 25:8, what attributes of God are highlighted, and how does He guide those who go astray?
2. In Psalm 84:11, what does the Lord provide to those who walk uprightly, and what does He withhold?
3. What promises does God make to the eunuchs in Isaiah 56:3-5, and how does this relate to feelings of exclusion or lack? [43:50]
4. What are some practical steps mentioned in the sermon for singles and those struggling with infertility to find contentment and purpose? [57:12]

#### Interpretation Questions
1. How can understanding God's goodness, as described in Psalm 25:8 and Psalm 84:11, help someone cope with unmet desires for marriage or children? [42:47]
2. What does the parable of the persistent widow teach us about the nature of prayer and persistence? How can this be applied to personal struggles with singleness or infertility? [49:03]
3. How does the Apostle Paul's view of singleness in 1 Corinthians 7 provide a different perspective on being single? What are the potential benefits he highlights? [01:03:23]
4. How can the promises in Isaiah 56:3-5 offer comfort and hope to those who feel excluded or undervalued by society? [43:50]

#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on a time when you felt your desires were unmet. How did you respond, and how might trusting in God's goodness change your perspective? [42:47]
2. In what ways can you be more persistent in prayer, especially when God's answer seems to be "wait" or "not now"? How can this persistence build your faith? [49:03]
3. If you are single, how can you use this season to serve God more fully? What specific steps can you take to deepen your devotion to Him? [01:03:23]
4. For those struggling with infertility, what are some ways you can grow closer to your spouse and find opportunities to mentor or support the next generation? [01:11:46]
5. How can you get more involved in your community or church to find fulfillment and purpose, regardless of your marital or parental status? [01:09:04]
6. What does it mean to seek first the kingdom of God in your current circumstances, and how can you practically apply this in your daily life? [57:12]
7. Think of someone in your life who might be feeling isolated due to singleness or infertility. How can you offer them support and community? [01:11:46]

Devotional

Day 1: Trusting God's Goodness in Unmet Desires
When our desires for marriage or children are unmet, it can be challenging to trust in God's goodness. Society and even the church often elevate marriage and children, which can leave those who are single or childless feeling isolated and envious. However, Psalm 25:8 and Psalm 84:11 remind us that God is our guide and provider, and He withholds no good thing from those who walk uprightly. This means that if we are in a season of singleness or childlessness, it is part of God's good plan for us. Trusting in God's goodness is crucial, even when our desires are unmet. We must believe that God is always good and that His plans for us are perfect, even when they don't align with our own desires. [42:47]

Isaiah 55:8-9 (ESV): "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Reflection: Think of a desire you have that remains unmet. How can you trust in God's goodness and plan for your life despite this unmet desire?

Day 2: The Importance of Patience and Persistence in Prayer
The parable of the persistent widow teaches us the importance of being persistent in prayer. Even when God's answer is "wait" or "not now," we should continue to seek Him and trust in His timing. This persistence builds our faith and aligns our desires with God's will. The Apostle Paul’s teachings in Romans 8:28 and his letters to the Corinthians emphasize that singleness and childlessness can be gifts that allow us to serve God without distraction. By being patient and persistent in prayer, we can grow closer to God and better understand His will for our lives. [49:03]

Luke 18:1-5 (ESV): "And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart. He said, 'In a certain city there was a judge who neither feared God nor respected man. And there was a widow in that city who kept coming to him and saying, "Give me justice against my adversary." For a while he refused, but afterward he said to himself, "Though I neither fear God nor respect man, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will give her justice, so that she will not beat me down by her continual coming."'"

Reflection: What is one area of your life where you need to be more persistent in prayer? How can you commit to seeking God consistently in this area?

Day 3: Embracing the Gift of Singleness
The Apostle Paul emphasizes that singleness can be a gift that allows us to serve God without distraction. In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul explains that an unmarried person can focus more on the Lord's work. This perspective helps us see singleness not as a curse but as an opportunity for deeper devotion to God. Embracing singleness as a gift can transform our outlook and help us find contentment and purpose in our current circumstances. By focusing on serving God and others, we can experience the fullness of life that God intends for us. [01:03:23]

1 Corinthians 7:32-34 (ESV): "I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband."

Reflection: How can you embrace your current season of singleness as a gift from God? What specific ways can you serve God and others during this time?

Day 4: Finding Contentment in Current Circumstances
Finding contentment in our current situation is essential. Whether single or struggling with infertility, we can use this time to serve God wholeheartedly. Jesus' teaching in Matthew 6:33 encourages us to seek first the kingdom of God, trusting that He will provide for our needs. By focusing on God's kingdom and His righteousness, we can find peace and contentment in our current circumstances. This shift in focus helps us to see our situation through God's eyes and trust that He is working all things for our good. [57:12]

Philippians 4:11-13 (ESV): "Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me."

Reflection: What steps can you take to find contentment in your current circumstances? How can you shift your focus to seeking God's kingdom and His righteousness?

Day 5: Building Community and Support
Getting involved in community and supporting others can bring fulfillment and purpose. For those struggling with infertility, pouring into the next generation through mentorship or volunteering can be incredibly rewarding. This not only helps others but also brings a sense of belonging and purpose. By building community and supporting others, we can experience the joy of serving and the fulfillment that comes from being part of something greater than ourselves. [01:11:46]

Hebrews 10:24-25 (ESV): "And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near."

Reflection: How can you get involved in your community and support others? What specific steps can you take to mentor or volunteer and pour into the next generation?

Quotes

1. "What do you do when you desire something with all of your heart but you're not receiving it? What do you do when all around you something's presented as normal but you don't feel like you fit into that category? Do you experience loneliness in that moment? Perhaps some discomfort? Content? Maybe even envy? See, we've been talking about stigmas in the church, right? Things that maybe they're not stigmas because they should be. In fact, they're not. But they're stigmas because we just don't really mention them that much or we just don't deal with them that well." [37:27] (51 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

2. "We need to remember that God is good. In fact, there's something that many Christians traditionally have said, right? Somebody says, God is good. See? All the time God is good. But in the midst of our loneliness, in the midst of our unfulfilled desires, we can begin to think about God as good as we are. We can begin to question God, if you're good, why aren't you giving me these good things? And so there's a hard truth that needs to be understood today. God is always good. He is always good." [42:11] (37 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

3. "If God is allowing us in this time, in this season, to be single, to not have children, that for us right now, this is a good. That seems weird to say, doesn't it? That's not how we like to think of things. But we need to understand if God is good and we trust in Him and we pray to Him and His answer right now is wait, not right now, can we trust? This is kind of in the same vein as when we talked about healings, right? Can we trust Him? In this moment." [43:24] (36 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

4. "I will bless those eunuchs who keep my Sabbath days holy and who choose to do what pleases me and commit their lives to me. In other words, nowadays in today's context, with the birth, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, with the gift of salvation and forgiveness of sins and adoption as sons and daughters of the Most High God, what He's saying is I will bless even those eunuchs, those who feel like they have nothing that society values. I will bless them when they commit themselves to following me. When they accept my grace on their lives, I will give them within the walls of my house a memorial and a name far greater than sons and daughters could give. For the name I give them is an everlasting one. It will never disappear." [44:16] (54 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

5. "Can you be content to honor God in your current situation while continuing to pray for the desires of your heart? Can you find contentedness to go, wow, you know what? I can use what I have to serve Christ in this moment. I'm actually in many ways gifted right now. I can dedicate myself into taking risks for the Lord and into spending time for the Lord and all of these things. When I hear the voice of the Lord, I can just go out and do it and I don't have to consult with someone else. I can just get out there and be obedient. Like, wow! I actually, in my faith life, I've got blessings right now." [57:12] (48 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

6. "It's better to know never marry than to marry the wrong person. Okay? That's something that my grandfather told me. He wanted to give some words of wisdom before he passed away. And one of the things that he left me in a note was the person that you marry has such potential to build you up or destroy your life. And so, so friends, especially young friends, that guy, that girl, they may be paying attention to you. You might feel like maybe this is your own option because you haven't been able to get a boyfriend or girlfriend to this point or your self-worth is struggling or man, they're at the top of the food chain at school or at work or wherever you might be. And so you are allowing this person who maybe doesn't value you as a person, maybe doesn't share the same stances on life that you do, and you allow yourself to go with them and go, you know what? I'm just going to marry this person." [50:21] (62 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

7. "Can you accept your singleness in this season? Can you accept it? Can you accept it? I get it. This one's hard in this day and age. Can you remain celibate in your singleness? Did you know that people devoted themselves to celibacy for their entire life for the sake of the Lord on a regular basis? Like today's society would tell you, man, if you're celibate, you're going to explode from within and your blood and guts are just going to be spread across the wall because no one should have to do that. People have done this for millennia just fine." [01:07:11] (42 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

8. "Think about it. Some of the most impactful and righteous people in history have been single with no kids. Have you ever thought about that? Jesus was single. No kids. The Apostle Paul, single, no kids. Mother Teresa, single, no kids. I mean, she would say that she had all the children of Calcutta. Which actually gets us into something else in a moment. Friends, it's good to marry, but it's also good to be single. It's good to have children, but it's also good to pour into others' children." [01:04:18] (46 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

9. "Can you believe that God is good? Can you trust Him? Can you be patient but persistent but also be submitted to the will of God in this moment for your life? Can you have the strength to allow the Lord and ask the Lord even to change your desires so that you can seek first the kingdom of God? So today I have some action steps for our singles and for those that struggle with infertility. For the rest of you, there's a reason why I prayed this morning, Lord, I just ask that you would speak whatever needs to be spoken to people because I understand that I'm not directly giving specific targeted stuff to every single one of you. But I think there's important things here that we can learn in general. God is good. That's a good one to know." [01:06:06] (57 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

10. "So here's some action steps for today. Singles. First of all, can you accept your singleness in this season? Can you accept it? Can you accept it? I get it. This one's hard in this day and age. Can you remain celibate in your singleness? Did you know that people devoted themselves to celibacy for their entire life for the sake of the Lord on a regular basis? Like today's society would tell you, man, if you're celibate, you're going to explode from within and your blood and guts are just going to be spread across the wall because no one should have to do that. People have done this for millennia just fine." [01:07:11] (45 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)

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Transcript

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