Embracing Forgiveness: A Journey Beyond Hurt

true we live in a hurting world to hurt is natural to forgive is Supernatural we're on a journey to forgiveness when I had recorded a video a couple days ago you might have seen it when I was near the ocean after I was done and headed to the car two guys were walking along the ocean and they were dressed in heavy coarse Brown robes with big rope belts you don't see that near the beach very often and so I asked them what their story was their names were Ben and Simon they're actually part of a Franciscan order actually a reformed Franciscan order and I told them I'm a pastor and I was talking to about forgiveness and you know you guys live in a monastic Community you're just devoted to prayer and worship and Union with God how often do issues of forgiveness come up for you and Ben's immediate response was every minute of every day. [00:24:55]

there is no place in this world that is safe from hurt but God has invented something called forgiveness and I'm learning a lot about it these days and what I want to talk to you about today is a part of the journey to Magic eyes to learning to see the people who have hurt me differently were you using um uh this little process called reach from E Worthington and the r stands for recall the hert so I want to talk to you about that one today by looking at the story of Joseph and his brothers and we'll return to that periodically because it's the climax of The Book of Genesis which is all about enormous hurt families are sources of incredible hurt. [00:131:48]

now in recalling the hurt what I do is I don't deny the fact that I have been hurt but I go back and I look at it this time not dwelling on my own victimhood and not rehearsing what a terrible person the person is that hurt me because unforgiveness always causes me to want to reduce them to just one who hurt me I remember often people would say to me things like everybody's doing the best they can I don't think that's true because I know I'm not but then somebody said what people do makes sense to them and I think that's true and then recalling the hurt I try to go back and look at the situation where I was hurt and seek not to excuse or minimize or deny but also not to rehearse how much Injustice I've received to look at it objectively to look at it the way that a reporter or a historian might to try to describe it in a way that everybody would agree with. [00:195:92]

Joseph a young man of 17 was tending the flocks with his brothers the sons of BHA and the sons of zilpa his father's wives and he brought their father a bad report to them now Joseph's the youngest so he would be like the assistant Shepherd but uh he decides that he's going to act as the supervisor and he tattles on his brothers to his father the text tells us whose Sons they were you might remember that Jacob had uh four wives Leah and Rachel and their two servants their two slave women these other sons that Joseph is with are the sons of the slay women so they would be the lowest status Sons they would be the most vulnerable and Joseph leverages that to um tell something negative about them he doesn't go to them and say hey guys I'm concerned with the level of your shepherding let's all bring it up and ACH he just goes to his dad so they have to live with us. [00:262:63]

now Israel or Jacob loved Joseph more than any of his other Sons you think about that favoritism is a theme that runs all through the Book of Genesis and all through human families and it does so much damage and he made an ornate robe for him when his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him now they've been hurt by their father but they feel hatred for their brother because if they express hostility towards their dad they would just be that much more rejected and uh what's going on in our heart always comes out of our mouth they find themselves unable to speak a kind word to their brother but Joseph apparently does not notice this or if he does notice it he doesn't care. [00:327:40]

Joseph had a dream and when he told it to his brothers they hated him all the more and it was a very grandiose dream about um the images of sheaves out in the field when he says my she Rose and stood upright while your sheaves gathered around mine and bowed down to it now imagine telling your siblings you'd had that dream his brother said to him do you intend to Reign Over Us will you actually rule us and they hated him all the more because of his dream and what he said there's no indication here that Joseph understood that power or Eminence is something to be used to serve and he has another dream and he said to his brothers listen I had another dream this time the son of the Moon 11 stars were bowing down to me when he told his father as well as his brothers his father finally rebukes him but apparently he does that because this time he's one of the ones that's going to bow down to Joseph really and we're told his brothers were jealous of him so there's jealousy and hatred that's Brewing and they have to live with this day after day. [00:381:80]

Jacob is so clueless as a father that even though his son hate Joseph can't stand him he wears that coat that his father had given him this ornamental coat that uh the only other time we see that word used apparently it's used for royalty it's an indication not just of favoritism but that probably Joseph is the one who would become the next patriarch and uh Jacob is so blind to all this that he sends Joseph into great harm and it's because his brothers have to live day after day knowing that Joseph is the favorite and with Joseph's own grandiosity and with him making them look bad before the eyes of his father and resentment and hatred brew that when he comes they say to themselves here comes that dreamer not our brother not Joseph here comes that dreamer. [00:504:08]

think about an area where you have been hurt and this is something that I have been spending lots and lots of time on and this can be quite difficult so you might not want to take the deepest hurt in your life just um something that you're aware of and recall it but seek to do that in a different way where now I'm not just rehearsing a story that will make me a victim and reinforce my sense of martyrdom and how I am subject to great Injustice and what a bad person that person is actually walk back through that story and try to write it down and I have done that in several cases literally written it down there's a do-it-yourself workbook by EV Worthington we sent out a link for that if you want to use that that can be quite helpful write down the story of a hurt only this time really try hard to be objective try to write it in such a way that the other person the person who hurts you your offender will would agree those are the facts of this situation don't excuse wrongdoing don't condone it don't deny it don't exaggerate it. [00:599:24]

God would you begin to give me magic eyes and that's the prayer for today as I look back on my past and seek to look at it in a different way and ask God for his help just pray God would you help me to look at this situation and the people people involved with a different set of eyes remembering that what people do probably looks right to them you know the brothers lived with that sense of uh hatred and knowing they weren't the favored they weren't loved day after day after day it's not like they grew up thinking we're going to choose one of our brothers and try to make him miserable it was not that way most people don't say I think I'll see what evil thing I can do today what they do make sense to them and I will will have to do some work to look through magic eyes that's the journey magic eyes today God forgive us our debts as we. [00:674:83]