When Dreams Get Real

Advent brings us close to Bethlehem, and this week I invited us to stand with Joseph in Matthew 1:18-25. Joseph begins in orientation: engaged to Mary, expecting a predictable life, confident in a righteousness defined by law and reputation. Then reality crashes in—Mary is pregnant, and he isn’t the father. In disorientation, Joseph tries to do the least harm he can see, planning a quiet divorce. Then God interrupts with a dream: take Mary as your wife, name the child Jesus, and step into a promise far larger than your old plans. In that moment Joseph’s world shifts from managing scandal to participating in salvation, from protecting status to protecting a story that will save the world.

Walter Brueggemann’s path from orientation to disorientation to reorientation helps make sense of Joseph’s journey—and ours. The first hard lesson is this: sometimes we must abandon the dream we carefully built. Joseph releases his picture of a life with Mary that safeguards both their reputations. Only then can he embrace the new dream God gives. The new dream is not victory over Rome but rescue from sin—deeper, wider, and more disruptive than anyone imagined. Joseph doesn’t speak; he obeys. His obedience turns a dream into reality: Emmanuel, God with us.

I asked us to consider where our own dreams have been dashed—careers, relationships, even church expectations. It’s tempting to hold the pieces together with minimal damage, but obedience may require stepping into what we cannot foresee. Congregations, like people, love newness in theory and familiarity in practice. Yet faithfulness might mean changing how we worship, serve, and exist for our neighbors in ways that feel strange. Joseph shows that when God’s dream takes hold, we are changed. Our vision widens, our instincts shift, and we become the kind of people through whom God’s presence becomes tangible.

This season invites us to be signs of Emmanuel for those who feel alone or besieged: to come near, to speak hope, to embody God’s nearness. Transformation comes as we trust enough to say “yes,” even while disoriented, and walk toward a future God is already shaping. Will we abandon old dreams, embrace God’s new dream, and let that obedience reorient us into Christlikeness?

Key Takeaways

• 1. Abandon the dream that no longer fits. Letting go is not failure; it is faith making room for what God knows we need. Joseph grieved a good dream, not a bad one. Grief is holy when it clears space for grace. Release is the door through which reorientation walks.
• 2. Obedience opens space for new dreams. Joseph acts before he understands how it will all work out. We tend to wait for certainty, but clarity often follows obedience, not the other way around. Small acts of faithfulness create the runway for God’s larger purposes to land.
• 3. Salvation redefines true righteousness. Joseph moves from protecting reputation to participating in redemption. The angel reframes salvation as freedom from sin, not simply relief from enemies. True righteousness aims at restored hearts and communities, not polished optics.
• 4. Be Emmanuel to someone this week. God’s presence is often felt through another person’s steady nearness. Sit with someone in their disorientation; don’t fix, accompany. Your attentive presence can preach hope more persuasively than a thousand words.

1. According to the passage, what decision had Joseph already made about Mary before the angel appeared, and what reason does the text give for that decision?
2. How does the angel describe the origin and purpose of the child’s birth (what words or phrases does Matthew use)?
3. What specific actions does Matthew say Joseph took after he woke from the dream?
4. Where in the passage is the name Emmanuel explained or connected to prophecy, and how is that explanation presented?

1. Why would Joseph choose a “quiet” dismissal instead of a public one? What does that choice reveal about his values and his understanding of righteousness?
2. How does the angel’s explanation that the child will “save his people from their sins” shift the expected meaning of Messiah for Joseph? What implications would that have for Joseph’s picture of the future?
3. What might Joseph’s silence (he speaks nowhere in the New Testament) and immediate obedience tell us about the relationship between understanding and action in a life of faith?
4. Using Brueggemann’s categories (orientation → disorientation → reorientation), where is Joseph at each stage in the story, and what turns the disorientation into reorientation?

1. Identify a dream you once held (career, marriage, ministry, reputation) that you had to abandon or that was dashed. Describe one feeling you still carry from that loss. How might that feeling be making you hold back from a new thing God could be doing?
2. Joseph chose to protect Mary’s dignity rather than publicly defend his own reputation. Is there a current situation where you are tempted to protect image or “win” public opinion instead of protecting people or a larger story of grace? What would a different, mercy-centered response look like this week?
3. The sermon emphasized obedience before full clarity. What is one small, concrete step you sense God asking you to take now (even if you don’t see the whole plan)? Who will you tell so you have an accountability partner?
4. The angel reframed the Messiah’s mission as rescue from sin, not merely political victory. Where in your life do you need your goals redefined by the gospel (ambition, relationships, how you seek security)? Name one concrete change you can make in the next month that reflects that redefinition.
5. Who in your circle is currently disoriented, lonely, or besieged? Pick one person and plan a specific act of Emmanuel to them this week (visit, 30‑minute listening time, a phone call, a tangible help). When will you do it and what will you say?
6. The sermon invites congregations to risk unfamiliar ways of serving neighbors. What is one way your small group or church could try a new, uncomfortable practice of service or worship in the next season? What first practical step will you take to explore it?