Distinguishing Wanting from Liking: A Path to Meaning

Devotional

Day 1: The Perils of Misaligned Desires

Understanding the story of Adam and Eve in Genesis 3 reveals how our desires can lead us to make choices that are not aligned with our ultimate values or joy. The desire to disobey God led to the fall of humanity, illustrating how wanting can lead us astray. This distinction between wanting and liking is crucial for navigating temptation and making better decisions. By recognizing that our desires may not always lead to true satisfaction, we can better align our actions with what we truly value. [01:23]

Genesis 3:6-7 (ESV): "So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths."

Reflection: Think of a recent decision where your desires led you away from your values. How can you realign your future choices with what you truly value?

Day 2: The Brain's Dual Systems of Desire

Research shows that wanting and liking are driven by different systems in the brain. Wanting is about motivation and anticipation, while liking is about evaluating what we have experienced. This understanding can help us recognize when our desires may not lead to true satisfaction. By being aware of these systems, we can better navigate our motivations and ensure that our actions align with our true values and long-term happiness. [02:57]

Proverbs 14:12 (ESV): "There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death."

Reflection: Identify a desire you are currently pursuing. Is it driven by wanting or liking? How can you ensure it aligns with your long-term values and joy?

Day 3: The Slavery of Unchecked Desires

C.S. Lewis highlights how people can become slaves to their desires, losing touch with real happiness. As we focus on what we want, we may find ourselves doing neither what we ought nor what we like, leading to a life of unfulfilled potential. By understanding the nature of temptation, we can resist the pull of desires that do not lead to true fulfillment and instead focus on what brings genuine joy and meaning. [08:17]

James 1:14-15 (ESV): "But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death."

Reflection: Reflect on an area of your life where you feel enslaved by desire. What steps can you take to break free and pursue what truly brings joy and fulfillment?

Day 4: Resisting Temptation Through Awareness

Temptation often plays on our wanting system, encouraging us to pursue desires without considering their long-term value or goodness. By being aware of our desires and focusing on what is good, we can resist temptation and live more meaningful lives. This awareness allows us to evaluate our motivations and choose actions that align with our values and purpose. [10:20]

1 Corinthians 10:13 (ESV): "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it."

Reflection: Consider a temptation you are currently facing. What practical steps can you take to focus on what is good and resist this temptation?

Day 5: The Mastery of Desires

Wanting is a wonderful servant but a terrible master. We have the God-given capacity to evaluate and choose what aligns with joy and goodness. By being aware of our desires and devoted to what is good, we can live lives that are congruent with our values and purpose. This mastery over our desires allows us to live with intention and fulfillment, rather than being driven by fleeting wants. [11:10]

Galatians 5:16-17 (ESV): "But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do."

Reflection: Identify one desire that has been mastering you. How can you take steps to become its master and align it with your spiritual values and purpose?

Sermon Summary

Embrace today as a gift from God, and let go of yesterday. Today, I want to explore the distinction between wanting and liking, a concept that is deeply rooted in the Bible and our lives. In Genesis 3, we see the fall of humanity, where the desire to disobey God led Adam and Eve to eat from the tree of knowledge. This story illustrates how wanting can lead us astray, as what we desire is not always what we will ultimately value or enjoy.

Research by Kent Berridge highlights the difference between our wanting and liking systems. Wanting is future-oriented and driven by motivation, while liking is about evaluating what we have already experienced. These systems are driven by different neural chemicals, with dopamine playing a key role in the wanting system. Experiments with rats showed that it is possible to want something without liking it, and vice versa. This distinction is crucial for understanding temptation, which often plays on our wanting system without considering the long-term value or goodness of what we desire.

C.S. Lewis, in "The Screwtape Letters," describes how people can become slaves to their desires, losing touch with real happiness and pleasure. As we become more focused on what we want, we may find ourselves doing neither what we ought nor what we like. This is the nature of temptation, which can lead us to waste our lives in meaningless pursuits.

Today, I encourage you to ask yourself two questions: What do I want? And what would produce the most good in this situation? Be aware of your desires, but do not be driven by them. Instead, focus on what is good and congruent with joy and meaning. Wanting is a wonderful servant but a terrible master. Let us use our God-given capacity to evaluate and choose what aligns with goodness and joy.

Key Takeaways

1. The story of Adam and Eve in Genesis 3 illustrates how wanting can lead us to make poor choices, as our desires are not always aligned with what we will ultimately value or enjoy. Understanding this distinction can help us navigate temptation and make better decisions. [01:23]
2. Research shows that wanting and liking are driven by different systems in the brain. Wanting is about motivation and anticipation, while liking is about evaluating what we have experienced. This understanding can help us recognize when our desires may not lead to true satisfaction. [02:57]
3. C.S. Lewis highlights how people can become slaves to their desires, losing touch with real happiness. As we focus on what we want, we may find ourselves doing neither what we ought nor what we like, leading to a life of unfulfilled potential. [08:17]
4. Temptation often plays on our wanting system, encouraging us to pursue desires without considering their long-term value or goodness. By being aware of our desires and focusing on what is good, we can resist temptation and live more meaningful lives. [10:20]
5. Wanting is a wonderful servant but a terrible master. We have the God-given capacity to evaluate and choose what aligns with joy and goodness. By being aware of our desires and devoted to what is good, we can live lives that are congruent with our values and purpose. [11:10]
** [11:10]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[00:51] - Wanting vs. Liking
[01:08] - The Fall of Humanity
[01:38] - The Temptations of Jesus
[02:25] - The Consequences of Wanting
[02:41] - Research on Motivation
[03:32] - The Brain's Reward System
[04:10] - Experiments with Rats
[05:19] - The Primitive Wanting System
[05:49] - Evaluating Our Experiences
[06:19] - The Mind of Christ
[07:18] - Addiction and Desire
[07:34] - C.S. Lewis on Temptation
[09:12] - The Power of Nothing
[10:20] - Questions to Consider
[11:29] - End of Teaching and Announcements

Sermon Clips

The story of Adam and Eve in Genesis 3 illustrates how wanting can lead us to make poor choices, as our desires are not always aligned with what we will ultimately value or enjoy. Understanding this distinction can help us navigate temptation and make better decisions. [00:01:08]

People what they wanted was a really poor indicator of what they would actually like and value when they experience it. Now there's a fascinating area of research over the last three decades or so, there is a researcher Kent Berridge and he was studying how motivation works. [00:02:20]

To want something is future oriented I don't have it yet but I anticipate it, wanting is about motivation therefore I'm really motivated to pursue it. Liking on the other hand is something that I have already attained or already achieved and I have experienced it and I'm evaluating was it good or not. [00:02:57]

It was possible for them to diminish the dopamine and rats brain circuitry and so what happened when they did that dopamine is deeply a part of the wanting system, and so a rat ceased to want this sugary water now when they tasted it when it was there and they were placed in it, they would like it as much as ever. [00:04:04]

The wanting system in animals is much more foundational it's much more primitive in lots of different animals they have a wanting system they don't even have a liking system the liking system is more fragile it evolved later on and it includes the capacity to evaluate so that as human beings like for Adam or for Eve or for you or for me. [00:05:19]

Now the way that Temptation works is it will play on your wanting system I want I want I want I want and separated from how will I evaluate this is this a good thing. I was thinking over the last couple days about there's an old old hymn you might know it may the mind of Christ Our Savior live in me from day to day. [00:06:19]

C.S. Lewis writes in screw tape letters this book about an older demon teaching a younger demon how to tempt people listen to this about wanting and liking he says as people become more and more slaves to what they want, young wormwood you'll be gradually freed from the tiresome business of producing Pleasures as Temptation pleasure is something I like. [00:07:34]

You will find that anything or nothing at all is sufficient to attract his wandering attention you no longer need a good book which he really likes to keep him from his prayers or his work or his sleep, you can make him waste his time not only in conversation he enjoys with people whom he likes but in conversations with those he cares nothing about on subjects that bore him. [00:08:22]

All wanting all wanting endless craving without any liking without any Joy or deep enjoyment or satisfaction of values and meaning and goodness so so so today two questions one is what do I want just be aware of this don't be driven by it but just be aware what do I desire. [00:10:09]

Wanting is a wonderful servant but a terrible master. We have also been given by God this design this capacity to evaluate to decide what is congruent with joy and the good so today be aware of what do I want, be devoted to what is the good. [00:11:10]

We have been given the capacity to want and that's a great thing, wanting is a wonderful servant but a terrible master. We have also been given by God this design this capacity to evaluate to decide what is congruent with joy and the good so today be aware of what do I want, be devoted to what is the good. [00:11:10]

The Christians describe the enemy as one with whom nothing is strong, and nothing is very strong this is Temptation, this is the evil one, strong enough to steal away a man's best years not in sweet sins but in a dreary flickering of the Mind Over it knows not what and it knows not why in the gratification of curiosity so feeble that the man is only half aware of them. [00:09:18]

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