June 21, 2026 The Cost of Discipleship

Matthew 10:34-39 comes on Father's Day with a hard word from Jesus. Jesus says that he did not come to bring peace to the earth, but a sword. Jesus names even the closest family bonds, father and son, mother and daughter, daughter-in-law and mother-in-law, and places them under the question of loyalty to him. Matthew 10:32-33 makes the challenge sharper, because whoever acknowledges Christ before others will be acknowledged before the Father, and whoever disowns Christ will be disowned before the Father.

Christian priorities become the heart of the matter. A life ordered rightly puts God first, then family, then church. The God-first priority shows up in the life of Ray Smith, who asked one simple question again and again: “Am I pleasing my God through my work?” That same priority asked whether his work brought honor and dignity to his family, and whether his life served the church. His leadership was not loud or controlling, but thoughtful, respectful, and wise. His witness even drew more than fifty coworkers into the same church, not by pressure, but because his life had weight.

The Methodist habit of rarely inviting others to church exposes a deeper problem. If it takes thirty-eight years for one Methodist Christian to invite one person, something is not right in the witness. Ray’s life stands as a contrast, because God first did not make him less loving toward others. God first made his life more attractive, more steady, and more fruitful.

The cost of discipleship stands behind all of this. God’s grace is free, but it is not cheap grace. Jesus does not call disciples onto an easy, wide, broad highway. Jesus calls disciples onto the narrow and rough way where each one must take up the cross and follow him.

The United Methodist witness gives examples of that cross. The opening of full ordination to women in 1956 recognized the calling of women whom God had already been using to teach, nurture, and lead. The fight against slavery, rooted in John Wesley’s clear rejection of enslaving others, also shows a costly Methodist witness for freedom. The church’s history still carries human mistakes and wounds, but the call remains to take up the cross for the dignity of all God’s people.

The present cross for St. Francis is love for children, youth, young adults, and the next generation. God-first love does not diminish family love. God-first love changes the eyes, so children and grandchildren are seen not as possessions, but as people who belong to God.

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Key Takeaways

• 1. God first orders every love. [52:54] God-first living does not push family away. God-first living purifies family love from control, pride, and possession. When God is first, children and grandchildren can be seen with dignity, not as extensions of a parent’s own desire. Love becomes freer because it begins in the Father’s love. [52:54]
• 2. Grace is free, not cheap. [58:31] The cost of discipleship does not mean salvation is earned. The cost means Christ does not invite disciples into a casual, comfortable faith with no surrender. The cross exposes the difference between receiving grace and treating grace as something light. A narrow and rough way can still be the way of life. [58:31]
• 3. Witness grows from ordered character. [56:53] Ray Smith’s life carried enough weight that coworkers wanted to know the church that shaped him. Invitation was not only a program or a sentence spoken once every thirty-eight years. A God-first life became visible in work, leadership, humility, and care. Evangelism became believable because the life had integrity. [56:53]
• 4. The cross includes human dignity. [01:00:17] The Methodist witness for women’s ordination and freedom from slavery shows that taking up the cross often means standing where dignity has been denied. God’s call does not fit neatly inside old human systems. When the church listens rightly, hidden callings and wounded people are brought into the light. Faithfulness sometimes looks like opening a door that should never have been closed. [60:17]
• 5. Children belong first to God. [01:07:25] God-first love changes the way family is understood. Sons, daughters, in-laws, and grandchildren are not possessions to manage, but persons who belong to God. That truth does not weaken affection. That truth teaches honor, respect, and free love. [67:25]

Youtube Chapters

• [00:00] - Welcome
• [38:52] - Father’s Day and the Holy Spirit
• [46:21] - Matthew 10 and a Hard Word
• [48:39] - The Question of Life Priorities
• [49:35] - Ray Smith’s God-First Life
• [52:54] - God, Family, and Church
• [54:44] - The Methodist Invitation Challenge
• [57:13] - Jesus Calls for First Loyalty
• [58:31] - Free Grace and Costly Discipleship
• [59:21] - Women’s Ordination and the Cross
• [61:48] - Juneteenth, Wesley, and Freedom
• [64:31] - St. Francis and the Next Generation
• [66:21] - God First Changes Family Love
• [68:23] - Prayer for New Eyes

Bible Reading
Matthew 10:32-39 (ESV)
32 “So everyone who acknowledges me before men, I also will acknowledge before my Father who is in heaven, 33 but whoever denies me before men, I also will deny before my Father who is in heaven. 34 Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35 For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. 36 And a person’s enemies will be those of his own household. 37 Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. 38 And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. 39 Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.”

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Observation Questions

1. In Matthew 10:34, Jesus says He came to bring a “sword,” not peace. What does the sword metaphor reveal about the impact of following Him?
2. How did Ray Smith’s daily question, “Am I pleasing my God through my work?” shape his priorities and relationships with coworkers? [53:08]
3. The sermon contrasts “free grace” with “cheap grace.” What distinction does it draw between receiving grace and living as a disciple? [58:31]
4. What two historical examples of “taking up the cross” in the Methodist tradition highlight the fight for human dignity? [01:00:17]

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Interpretation Questions

1. Why does Jesus use family conflict (e.g., father vs. son, mother vs. daughter) to illustrate loyalty to Him? How might this have challenged cultural norms of His time?
2. The sermon claims that “God-first love does not diminish family love.” How does prioritizing God purify or transform how we love family members? [52:54]
3. Ray Smith’s coworkers joined his church not because of pressure, but because his life “had weight.” What does this suggest about the relationship between character and evangelism? [56:53]
4. How does recognizing children as “belonging first to God” change the way parents relate to them? [01:07:25]

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Application Questions

1. What practical step could you take this week to prioritize “God first” in a decision involving your family, work, or time? How might this reorder your other commitments?
2. The Methodist Church took 38 years on average to invite one person to church. What fears or habits make it hard to share your faith naturally? How could your daily life become more “invitable” to others? [56:09]
3. Reflect on a time when following Jesus caused tension in a relationship. How did you navigate loyalty to Christ while still honoring that person?
4. The sermon says, “Children are not possessions.” Where do you feel tempted to control or claim ownership over someone else’s choices? How could prayer help release them to God? [01:07:42]
5. Ray Smith’s leadership was marked by humility and wisdom. What is one area where you could lead others—at work, home, or church—with less control and more thoughtful collaboration? [51:53]
6. The cross of discipleship might mean advocating for someone’s dignity today. Who in your community is overlooked or marginalized? How could you “stand where dignity has been denied”? [01:00:17]