Games We Play // The Change Game

That's kinda harsh, I would think. And Jesus says this about somebody that thinks like that. You hypocrite. Speck meet plank. He says, first, take the plank out of your own eye and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye. He doesn't say to ignore the speck. He says to fix the order. Looking at yourself, correcting yourself, that comes first. Repentance comes before confrontation. Humility comes before influence. The change game says, they go first. Jesus says, you go first. [00:12:26] (45 seconds)  #PlankBeforeSpeck

So you don't gain authority by winning arguments, you gain it by modeling repentance. So this week, instead of asking what do they need to fix, ask what's God trying to fix in me? And instead of saying they need to go first, say, I'll go first. And when you feel the urge to correct, pause for just a minute. Before you send the text, before you post the comment on social media, before you make the remark, pause. Take a look in the mirror. [00:19:26] (38 seconds)  #ModelRepentance

The more I recognize how much God's done in me, the more helpful I'm gonna be when I'm trying to help somebody else. The mirror removes any illusion of high ground. Jesus isn't saying throw away the magnifier forever. He's saying put it down until you've picked up the mirror. The mirror softens your tone, changes your posture or your approach, and it turns correction into care. You become less of a prosecutor and more of a fellow patient who's found a physician. And that's the approach that we should be taking. [00:17:37] (38 seconds)  #CorrectionWithCare

So in your relationship, I would encourage you especially if you're married or you're with somebody a lot that you care about, just leave one critical comment a day left unsaid. I'm sure there's other things that you could think of, but you don't have to say them all. You don't have to say all the things that come to your mind. And ask yourself, have I examined my own heart? Have I picked up the mirror? You don't stop caring about the speck that's in somebody's eye. You just start caring differently. I love that. And that is where real change begins. [00:21:00] (38 seconds)  #SkipOneCriticism

And the gap, if we're not careful, we'll be looking backward and say, hey, you, look how far we've come. We are so much better at this than you are and not recognize how far we are yet to go in our relationship with him. And that's what the mirror does for us. It gives us compassion. Doesn't leave out the speck, but it helps us take care of the plank before we get to the speck. And the more honest I am with the mirror, the more helpful I'm gonna be with the magnifier. [00:17:01] (35 seconds)  #MirrorBuildsCompassion

So he's not saying not to evaluate things, not to use discernment. He's not condemning moral conviction. What he's doing is condemning arrogant condemnation. And that's what we're gonna talk about a little bit about what that arrogant condemnation looks like. And so there's a difference. To judge is to be critical before you're compassionate. And you can be right in content and wrong in spirit. [00:07:19] (30 seconds)  #DiscernNotCondemn

And we typically use a magnifying glass on others. And the thing about a magnifying glass is we use it to enlarge their tone, to make it bigger than what they really mean to exaggerate what they're saying so that gives us an opportunity maybe to point out some other things. We use it we use it to amplify their mistakes, and we also use it to confirm that we're right. The thing about holding on to a magnifying glass and using it often, you get into a habit. You're more inclined to judge, and you're less inclined toward compassion. [00:13:41] (40 seconds)  #DropTheMagnifier

I really do enjoy using magnifying glass, but I'll tell you this. If I held on to the magnifying glass, I would be magnifying everything that I see in front of me. And to a hammer, everything looks like a nail. You know? So you're I'm running around with this thing and I am pointing out stuff that I see in other people's lives. Compassion on the other hand would say that we are going to or let me let me just say this before we get into the next device we use. Our heart should break for people before our minds judge them. [00:14:21] (35 seconds)  #HeartBeforeJudgment