Built to Heal: The Power and Flow of Forgiveness

Devotional

Day 1: Forgiveness Is a Flow, Not a One-Time Event

Forgiveness is not about keeping count or waiting until we feel like it; it is a continual flow that we receive from God and are called to release to others, just as Jesus taught Peter that forgiveness should be limitless. When we allow forgiveness to flow through us as quickly as we are hurt or offended, we build up spiritual immunity against the enemy’s attacks and experience the healing God intends for our hearts and relationships. Forgiveness is not optional—it is God’s command and His gift to help us heal, and it is the antidote that blocks the infection of bitterness and resentment from taking root in our lives. [09:02]

Matthew 18:21-22 (ESV)
Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

Reflection: Who is one person you need to forgive today, even if you have already tried before? What would it look like to let forgiveness flow again, right now, without waiting for an apology or a change in their behavior?

Day 2: Forgiveness Strengthens Our Spiritual Immunity

Unforgiveness acts like a spiritual virus, weakening our defenses and making us vulnerable to bitterness, anger, and broken relationships, but forgiveness is God’s provision to strengthen us and keep our hearts healthy. Just as our physical immune system protects us from disease, choosing forgiveness protects our hearts from the destructive effects of offense and pain, allowing us to move forward and experience God’s healing. Forgiveness is not pretending we weren’t hurt or excusing what happened; it is a choice to trust God’s command and receive His strength to heal, layer by layer, as we walk through the process. [13:53]

Ephesians 4:26-27, 31-32 (ESV)
Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. ... Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

Reflection: What symptoms of unforgiveness—like irritability, scorekeeping, or cynicism—do you notice in your own life? How can you invite God to strengthen your spiritual immunity by choosing forgiveness in those areas today?

Day 3: Forgiveness Leaves Room for God to Work

Unforgiveness creates space for the enemy to operate in our lives, but forgiveness opens the door for God’s healing and restoration; when we refuse to take revenge and instead trust God with our pain, we make room for His justice and goodness to prevail. Even when it feels impossible, God calls us to overcome evil with good, letting go of our right to get even and allowing Him to move in ways we cannot. Forgiveness is not about what others deserve, but about leaving space for God’s power and presence to transform our hearts and situations. [28:36]

Romans 12:19-21 (ESV)
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Reflection: Where are you tempted to take matters into your own hands or seek revenge? What would it look like to leave room for God to work in that situation by choosing forgiveness instead?

Day 4: Forgiveness Is a Daily Practice

Jesus taught us to pray for forgiveness daily, both to receive it and to release it to others, making forgiveness a regular rhythm that keeps our hearts unclogged and open to God’s grace. Just as we need daily bread, we need daily forgiveness—both from God and for those who have hurt us—so that we can walk in freedom and keep the flow of God’s love and healing moving through our lives. Forgiveness is not a one-time event but a continual practice that sustains us and keeps us spiritually healthy. [22:23]

Matthew 6:9-15 (ESV)
Pray then like this:
“Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.
Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you,
but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

Reflection: How can you make forgiveness a part of your daily routine, just like prayer or reading Scripture? Is there someone you need to forgive today as part of your daily walk with God?

Day 5: We Forgive Because We Have Been Forgiven

The foundation of our ability to forgive others is the forgiveness we have received from Jesus; we are called to release forgiveness not because others deserve it, but because God has already forgiven us through Christ. When we receive God’s forgiveness for our own sins, we are empowered to extend that same grace to others, breaking the cycle of hurt and allowing God’s healing to flow through our lives and relationships. Forgiveness is both a gift we receive and a gift we give, and it is the key to experiencing true freedom and restoration in our hearts and families. [33:11]

Colossians 3:12-14 (ESV)
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

Reflection: Take a moment to reflect on the forgiveness you have received from Jesus. How does remembering His grace toward you help you extend forgiveness to someone else today?

Sermon Summary

Today, we gathered as a family of faith to explore the reality that none of us come from perfect families, and yet, in our imperfections, God’s grace and healing are most powerfully at work. We are reminded that our need for a perfect God is revealed through the messiness of our relationships, and that God does not shy away from our brokenness—He runs toward it, eager to bring restoration. Just as our physical bodies are designed with immune systems to fight off disease, our spiritual lives are built to heal, but only if we guard against the “virus” of unforgiveness.

Unforgiveness is like a sickness that weakens our spiritual immunity. It drains our joy, erodes our peace, and disconnects us from one another. Its symptoms—hypersensitivity, irritability, scorekeeping, and a constant sense of being misunderstood—are not signs of spiritual failure, but indicators that our hearts have been wounded and need healing. The effects of unforgiveness are devastating: it builds walls, kills connection, and keeps us stuck in cycles of pain and disappointment. But God, in His wisdom, has given us the antidote: forgiveness.

Forgiveness is not a feeling or a one-time event; it is a continual flow, a daily decision to let God’s grace move through us. Jesus taught that forgiveness is not about keeping count, but about keeping the flow open—receiving forgiveness from God so that we can release it to others. This is not easy, especially when the pain is deep or the wounds are fresh. Healing from the impact of trauma takes time, and triggers are not proof of failure, but reminders that more healing is needed.

We are called to forgive not because others deserve it, but because we have been forgiven by Christ. Unforgiveness gives the enemy a foothold, but forgiveness creates space for God to work. The process of forgiveness requires three things: deciding to forgive, depending on God’s strength, and obeying His command. It is not about denying the hurt or excusing the wrong, but about unclogging the flow of God’s healing in our lives. Ultimately, we must first receive the forgiveness Jesus offers before we can truly release it to others. In doing so, we allow God’s healing to flow through us, making us strong, resilient, and able to love as He loves.

Key Takeaways

1. Unforgiveness Weakens Spiritual Immunity Unforgiveness acts like a spiritual virus, draining our joy, peace, and connection with others. Its symptoms—such as irritability, hypersensitivity, and bitterness—signal that our hearts are wounded and in need of healing. Recognizing these signs is not a mark of failure, but an invitation to seek God’s healing and restore the flow of grace in our lives. [05:58]
2. Forgiveness Is a Continual Flow, Not a One-Time Event Forgiveness is not about keeping score or waiting for the right feeling; it is a daily, sometimes moment-by-moment, decision to let God’s grace move through us. Just as our bodies need a constant flow of immunity to stay healthy, our spirits need a continual flow of forgiveness to remain strong and free from the infection of bitterness. [09:02]
3. Healing from Hurt Takes Time and Layers Forgiving the facts of what happened is a step of obedience, but healing from the impact is a process that unfolds over time. Triggers and recurring pain are not evidence of failure, but reminders that deeper healing is needed. God’s grace meets us in each layer, allowing us to move forward without being defined by our wounds. [19:52]
4. Forgiveness Creates Space for God to Work Unforgiveness leaves the door open for the enemy, but forgiveness makes room for God’s presence and power. By choosing to forgive, we unclog the flow of God’s healing and prevent anger, bitterness, and revenge from taking root. This act of obedience is not about the other person’s worthiness, but about our own freedom and God’s glory. [25:24]
5. Forgiveness Begins with Receiving from Jesus We cannot release what we have not received. The first step in living a life of forgiveness is to accept the forgiveness Jesus offers us. Only then can we truly extend grace to others, allowing God’s healing to flow through our imperfect families and relationships. [33:11]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[01:10] - Gratitude for Church Family
[02:42] - Series Recap: Imperfect Family
[04:30] - Built to Heal: Our Spiritual Immunity
[05:58] - The Virus of Unforgiveness
[09:02] - Forgiveness: The Antidote
[11:18] - Symptoms and Effects of Unforgiveness
[13:53] - Immunity Doesn’t Stop Hurt
[16:40] - The Epidemic of Unforgiveness
[19:52] - Healing from Impact and Triggers
[22:23] - Forgiveness Is a Flow
[25:24] - Forgiveness Leaves Room for God
[28:36] - How to Live Out Forgiveness
[31:37] - Decide, Depend, and Obey
[33:11] - Receiving Forgiveness from Jesus
[34:30] - Prayer and Response

Bible Study Guide

**Bible Study Discussion Guide: Built to Heal – The Flow of Forgiveness**

---

### Bible Reading

**Matthew 18:21-22 (ESV)**
> Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

**Matthew 6:9-15 (ESV)**
> Pray then like this:
> “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.
> Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.
> Give us this day our daily bread,
> and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
> And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.
> For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you,
> but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

**Ephesians 4:26-27, 31-32 (ESV)**
> Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. ...
> Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.
> Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

---

### Observation Questions

In Matthew 18:21-22, what is Peter’s question to Jesus, and how does Jesus respond about the number of times we should forgive?
According to the sermon, what are some of the “symptoms” of unforgiveness that can show up in our lives and relationships? ([11:18])
In Ephesians 4:26-27, what warning does Paul give about anger and the opportunity it gives to the enemy?
What does Jesus teach about forgiveness in the Lord’s Prayer in Matthew 6:9-15?

---

### Interpretation Questions

Why do you think Jesus tells Peter that forgiveness is not about counting, but about a continual flow? What does this reveal about God’s heart for relationships? ([09:02])
The sermon compares unforgiveness to a virus that weakens our spiritual immunity. How does this analogy help us understand the impact of holding onto hurt? ([05:58])
According to the sermon, why is it important to recognize the “symptoms” of unforgiveness in our lives? How can these symptoms be an invitation rather than a sign of failure? ([11:18])
What does it mean that forgiveness is not a feeling or a one-time event, but a daily decision and a flow? How does this challenge common ideas about forgiveness? ([22:23])

---

### Application Questions

The sermon listed symptoms like hypersensitivity, irritability, and scorekeeping as signs of unforgiveness. Which of these symptoms have you noticed in yourself recently, especially in your family or close relationships? What might God be inviting you to address? ([11:18])
Think about a time when you tried to forgive but still felt pain or were “triggered” by the memory. How does the idea that healing happens in layers encourage you to keep moving forward? ([19:52])
The sermon said, “Forgiveness is not about denying the hurt or excusing the wrong, but about unclogging the flow of God’s healing in our lives.” Is there a hurt you’ve been trying to ignore or minimize instead of bringing it to God for healing? What would it look like to be honest with God about it this week? ([22:23])
Forgiveness is described as a decision, dependence on God, and obedience. Which of these three steps is hardest for you right now, and why? ([31:37])
The sermon challenged us to “decide to forgive before we even get out of bed.” What would it look like for you to start your day with a prayer of forgiveness, even before anything happens? How might this change your interactions? ([31:37])
The message said, “We cannot release what we have not received.” Have you truly received the forgiveness Jesus offers you? If not, what is holding you back? If yes, how does this shape the way you forgive others? ([33:11])
Is there a relationship in your life right now where unforgiveness is “clogging the flow” of God’s grace? What is one practical step you can take this week to begin the process of forgiveness, even if the other person never apologizes? ([25:24])

---

Sermon Clips

``Forgiveness is not optional forgiveness is something that we are commanded to do by god it's a part of his plan for our life and our families forgiveness is forgiveness is actually a gift from god that he's given us to help us heal our human heart we are built to heal and forgiveness is the antidote an antidote is something that counteracts what's attacking it blocks it prevents and so forgiveness does that in our life and in our families it counteracts and it blocks and prevents what the enemy tries to do with unforgiveness. [00:09:35] (38 seconds) #ForgivenessIsAntidote

Just because we have the answer the antidote which is forgiveness doesn't mean it stops the disease from attacking but it does block it from infecting we cannot stop every hurt and disappointment and betrayal or offense coming our way but we can build up our immunity so it doesn't infect us and that's where forgiveness becomes powerful here's what's true in our life and in our families we are not going to be able to stop hurt betrayal gossip offense lies manipulation judgment because see the goal is not that we stop the hurt from happening because we can't the goal is that we build up our immunity by letting forgiveness flow through us so the hurt doesn't infect us. [00:13:02] (70 seconds) #ForgiveTheFactsHealTheImpact

Immunity doesn't stop the disease but it blocks it from infecting us forgiveness forgiveness is the immunity that blocks unforgiveness from infecting our lives forgiveness actually strengthens our immunity forgiveness strengthens our immunity we are built to heal in other words we don't have to stay stuck and we don't have to stay hurting and clogged up because forgiveness strengthens us forgiveness is god's provision for us to heal but britney how do i forgive when pain is so real and it seems like they just get to keep living however they want how is that strengthening me well it strengthens us because it builds our immunity. [00:14:13] (60 seconds) #TriggersSignalHealing

Unforgiveness unforgiveness clogs the flow of forgiveness in our life unforgiveness makes us spiritually vulnerable it weakens our immune system unforgiveness we think comes with terms and conditions right like if you do this then i'll do this well when this happens then i'll forgive but forgiveness does not come with terms and conditions we are just simply told to forgive it's a flow we really we receive it so we can release it and then we repeat it we have to receive it so we can release it and then we repeat it forgiveness is a flow. [00:22:23] (42 seconds) #LeaveRoomForGod

Forgiveness is serious forgiveness is a flow and it should be a part of our daily life forgiveness is something we receive so we can release you know the bible from genesis to revelation is filled with the message of forgiveness the forgiveness we receive from jesus and the forgiveness we release because of jesus and the awesome thing about the antidote of forgiveness is that it is always available to us we don't have to wait for an appointment we don't have to wait to get into the counselor we don't have to wait to meet with a service pastor we don't have to we don't have to wait until it's bad enough we don't have to wait because we have the power of holy spirit alive and active in our life helping us forgive as we have been forgiven. [00:24:04] (53 seconds) #DecideDependObey

Forgiveness is the antidote to the disease of unforgiveness in our life it doesn't stop the hurt and the offense but it blocks it and it prevents us from infecting us the unforgiveness fosters anger bitterness resentment and this is not just emotional language it's actually deeply spiritual because right after jesus tells us to forgive the very next line is is about temptation and this pattern that we see throughout scripture shows us again and again that undealt with anger bitterness resentment desire for revenge opens the door for sin to take over. [00:24:57] (50 seconds) #ForgivenessIsADecision

This is what unforgiveness does it leaves the door cracked open and sin waits for any chance to slip in anger itself wasn't cain's downfall unresolved anger was unforgiveness that just sits and stews and grows see unforgiveness creates space for the enemy but forgiveness creates space for god ephesians 4 paul says in 26 and 27 in your anger do not sin do not let the sun go down while you are still angry and do not give the devil a foothold don't even get him a little out because that is all that he needs. [00:26:58] (39 seconds) #DependOnGodToForgive

Paul goes on to say don't let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth but only what's helpful for building others up according to their needs that it may benefit those who listen and do not grieve the holy spirit of god with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption get rid of all bitterness rage and anger brawling and slander along with every form of malice be kind and compassionate to one another forgiving each other just as in christ god forgave you we forgive because jesus forgave us not because they deserve it not because they earned it not because they apologize the right way but because god has already done his part and unforgiveness keeps us from receiving it. [00:27:37] (50 seconds) #ObedienceHeals

A lot of these natural flesh reactions bitterness anger revenge they clog the flow and they don't leave room for god to work do you know that we don't have to take revenge that we're actually not supposed to as much as we might want to we don't get back to get even i know that's what the world says but the bible says that vengeance is the lord's paul says in romans 12 one of my favorite verses do not take revenge my dear friends but leave room for god's wrath for it's written it's mine to avenge i will repay says the lord do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good forgiveness leaves room for god and i've learned in my life that i want to leave as much room for god to move in my life as possible. [00:28:27] (65 seconds) #ReceiveToRelease

If forgiveness is the antidote and forgiveness is the flow and it's what strengthens our immunity and forgiveness is providing us the healing that we need for our hearts how do we actually live this out in real life how do we do this in our marriages and in our families and our friendships i think we have to do three things we have to decide we have to depend and we have to obey we have to decide to do it because forgiveness it starts with the decision it's not a feeling the best time to forgive forgive is actually before give us today our daily bread forgive us our debts what if we just applied that every morning and we chose before we even got out of bed i am going to have this forgiveness flowing through me. [00:29:33] (55 seconds)

Ask a question about this sermon

Chatbot

What is the biblical definition of forgiveness?

How does unforgiveness weaken spiritual immunity?

What are practical steps to live in forgiveness daily?