Building Trust Through Servanthood and Understanding

 

Summary

Summary

To walk in the footsteps of Jesus is to embrace the journey of servanthood—a pilgrimage that is not defined by our own declarations, but by the way others experience our presence and actions. True servanthood is marked by a welcoming spirit, where people feel emotionally secure and valued in our company. Acceptance, as the opposite of rejection, is rooted in recognizing the image of God in every person, and every interaction nudges others either toward or away from the splendor God intends for them.

Central to this journey is the cultivation of trust. Trust is not simply a feeling, but a confidence that the other person will not intentionally harm us, and that we will act in their best interests. Building trust requires us to continually ask: “Is what I am doing, thinking, or saying going to build trust or break trust with this person?” Yet, trust is not universal in its expression; it is deeply shaped by culture, family, and individual experience. What builds trust in one context may undermine it in another, as illustrated by stories from around the world—whether it’s a son seeking connection with his reserved father, or cross-cultural misunderstandings between Americans and Kenyans about hospitality and friendship.

Trust is fragile and easily broken, often by well-intentioned actions that fail to consider the other’s perspective. When trust is damaged, the path forward is humility and forgiveness—acknowledging our mistakes, seeking reconciliation, and being willing to start again. The Peanuts cartoon of Snoopy and the cat next door serves as a parable: attempts at friendship can be misunderstood if we approach others with hidden barriers or assumptions. Nonverbal cues, past histories, and unspoken expectations all play a role in how trust is built or broken.

Mediators—those who help us see the other’s perspective and soften our approach—are invaluable in restoring trust. Affirmation and encouragement open hearts to new possibilities, while humility allows us to take incremental steps toward deeper relationship. Ultimately, trust is built not in grand gestures, but in small, consistent acts of understanding and care, always seeking to serve from the other’s frame of reference. In this way, we reflect Christ’s love and create space for God’s transforming work in our relationships.

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Key Takeaways

- Servanthood is a Journey, Not a Status
Becoming a servant is not a title we claim, but a reputation earned through consistent, humble actions that others recognize as genuine service. It is a pilgrimage that requires patience, self-examination, and a willingness to let others define the impact of our service. This journey shapes our character and aligns us with the example of Christ, who came not to be served, but to serve. [00:51]

- Trust Must Be Built from the Other’s Perspective
Trust is not a one-size-fits-all concept; it is defined by the needs, expectations, and cultural context of the other person. Well-intentioned actions can break trust if we fail to consider how they will be received. True trust-building requires us to step outside our own frame of reference and ask, “What will build trust with this person, in their world?” [06:09]

- Cultural Differences Profoundly Shape Relationships
Misunderstandings often arise not from malice, but from differing cultural norms about friendship, hospitality, and communication. What is considered polite or friendly in one culture may be seen as distant or even rude in another. Recognizing and honoring these differences is essential for building authentic, trust-filled relationships across boundaries. [14:33]

- Trust is Fragile and Requires Humility to Repair
Even with the best intentions, trust can be quickly broken—sometimes by small missteps or miscommunications. The willingness to admit fault, seek forgiveness, and start anew is vital. Most people are eager for reconciliation and peace, but it takes humility and vulnerability to initiate the process of repair. [18:54]

- Small, Consistent Steps Build Lasting Trust
Trust is rarely established through dramatic gestures; rather, it grows through small, incremental acts of kindness, understanding, and affirmation. When mistakes are made, honest apologies and a readiness to try again pave the way for deeper connection. In both spiritual and everyday relationships, these steady steps create the foundation for enduring trust and transformation. [47:06]

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Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[00:51] - Servanthood as a Pilgrimage
[01:59] - The Power of Welcoming and Acceptance
[02:42] - Valuing Others as Image Bearers
[03:39] - Defining Trust and Confidence
[04:59] - The Prior Question of Trust
[06:09] - Trust from the Other’s Perspective
[06:48] - Building Trust in Family and Work
[07:48] - A Son’s Journey to Know His Father
[14:33] - Cross-Cultural Friendship Challenges
[18:00] - Hospitality and Misunderstandings
[18:54] - The Fragility of Trust and Forgiveness
[20:24] - Lessons from Snoopy and the Cat
[25:13] - Risks and Mixed Messages in Trust
[33:46] - The Role of the Mediator
[37:02] - Seeing Through Another’s Eyes
[41:42] - Incremental Steps Toward Reconciliation
[47:06] - Trust Built in Small Steps
[49:10] - Serving from the Other’s Frame of Reference
[50:18] - Closing Reflections and Comments

Study Guide

Bible Study Discussion Guide: Walking in the Footsteps of Jesus—Servanthood and Trust

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### Bible Reading

- Mark 10:45
“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

- Romans 15:7
“Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.”

- Ephesians 4:32
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

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### Observation Questions

1. According to Mark 10:45, what was Jesus’ purpose in coming to earth? How does this shape our understanding of servanthood?
2. In the sermon, what are some ways people feel welcomed and emotionally secure in someone’s presence? ([01:59])
3. What does the speaker say is the difference between acceptance and rejection, and how does this relate to seeing the image of God in others? ([02:42])
4. What are some examples from the sermon of how trust can be built or broken in different cultural contexts? ([14:33])

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### Interpretation Questions

1. The sermon describes servanthood as a “pilgrimage” or journey, not a status. Why is it important that others—not ourselves—recognize us as servants? How does this challenge our usual approach to serving? ([00:51])
2. The speaker says trust is “fragile and easily broken.” Why do you think even well-intentioned actions can damage trust? What role does humility play in repairing trust? ([18:54])
3. How do cultural backgrounds and family experiences shape what builds or breaks trust? Can you think of a time when your good intentions were misunderstood because of different expectations? ([14:33])
4. The sermon mentions that affirmation and encouragement can open hearts to new possibilities. Why might small, consistent acts of kindness be more effective than grand gestures in building trust? ([47:06])

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### Application Questions

1. Think of a relationship where you want to serve more like Jesus. What is one small, consistent action you could take this week to make the other person feel welcomed and valued? ([01:59])
2. The speaker encourages us to ask, “Is what I am doing, thinking, or saying going to build trust or break trust with this person?” Choose a current relationship and discuss how you might apply this question in a practical situation. ([04:59])
3. Have you ever tried to help someone, only to realize later that your actions were not received as you intended? What could you do differently next time to better understand their perspective? ([06:09])
4. When trust is broken, the sermon suggests humility and forgiveness are key to reconciliation. Is there someone you need to apologize to or seek forgiveness from? What is holding you back? ([18:54])
5. The story of Snoopy and the cat shows how nonverbal cues and hidden assumptions can get in the way of building trust. Can you think of a recent situation where your words or actions sent mixed messages? How could you clarify your intentions? ([25:13])
6. The sermon highlights the importance of mediators—people who help us see another’s perspective. Who in your life could help you better understand someone you’re struggling to connect with? How might you invite their input? ([33:46])
7. Trust is built in “small, incremental steps.” What is one step you can take this week to repair or strengthen a relationship where trust has been damaged? ([47:06])

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Devotional

Day 1: Servanthood as a Lifelong Pilgrimage of Humble Presence
To walk in the footsteps of Jesus means embracing servanthood not as a title or status but as a continuous journey marked by humility and patience. True servanthood is recognized by others through consistent, genuine actions that create a welcoming environment where people feel emotionally secure and valued. This pilgrimage shapes character and aligns one’s life with Christ’s example, who came not to be served but to serve. It requires a willingness to let others define the impact of your service, understanding that servanthood is about how your presence and actions affect those around you.
As you reflect on your own journey, consider how your daily interactions either invite others into a space of acceptance or inadvertently create barriers. Servanthood is not about self-promotion but about cultivating a reputation earned through love and care that mirrors Christ’s heart. [00:51]

Psalm 40:6-8 (ESV)
“Sacrifice and offering you did not desire, but my ears you have opened; burnt offering and sin offering you did not require. Then I said, ‘Behold, I have come; in the scroll of the book it is written of me: I delight to do your will, O my God; your law is within my heart.’”

Reflection:
What is one small, humble action you can take today that reflects Christ’s servanthood and invites others to feel truly welcomed and valued in your presence?



Day 2: Trust Grows When We See Through Another’s Eyes
Trust is not a universal feeling but a confidence built from the other person’s perspective, shaped by their needs, expectations, and cultural background. What builds trust in one relationship may break it in another if we fail to consider how our words and actions are received. True trust-building requires stepping outside your own frame of reference and asking, “What will build trust with this person, in their world?” This posture of empathy and attentiveness is essential for nurturing authentic connections.
By intentionally seeking to understand the other’s viewpoint, you create space for trust to flourish. This means listening deeply, suspending assumptions, and adapting your approach to meet the unique context of each relationship. [06:09]

Proverbs 20:5 (ESV)
“The purpose in a man’s heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out.”

Reflection:
Who in your life might be experiencing your words or actions differently than you intend? How can you begin to see the situation from their perspective to build or restore trust?



Day 3: Embracing Cultural Differences to Foster Genuine Connection
Relationships often face challenges not because of ill will but due to differing cultural norms around friendship, hospitality, and communication. What one culture views as warm and inviting may be perceived as distant or intrusive in another. Recognizing and honoring these differences is crucial for building authentic, trust-filled relationships across cultural boundaries.
When you approach others with cultural humility, you open the door to deeper understanding and reduce misunderstandings. This posture invites grace and patience, allowing relationships to grow in ways that reflect God’s inclusive love. It also challenges you to expand your own worldview and embrace diversity as a gift rather than a barrier. [14:33]

1 Corinthians 9:22 (ESV)
“To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all people, that by all means I might save some.”

Reflection:
In what ways can you intentionally learn about and respect the cultural perspectives of those around you to build bridges of trust and friendship?



Day 4: Humility and Forgiveness as Pathways to Repair Broken Trust
Trust is fragile and can be broken even by well-meaning actions or misunderstandings. When trust is damaged, the way forward is through humility—acknowledging mistakes, seeking forgiveness, and being willing to start again. Most people desire reconciliation, but it takes vulnerability to initiate repair.
Approaching broken trust with a humble heart opens the door for healing and renewed connection. It requires setting aside pride and embracing the discomfort of admitting fault. This process reflects Christ’s grace and invites His transforming work into relationships marked by brokenness. [18:54]

James 5:16 (ESV)
“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”

Reflection:
Is there a relationship in your life where trust has been broken? What step of humility can you take today to begin the process of reconciliation and healing?



Day 5: Building Lasting Trust Through Small, Consistent Acts
Trust is rarely established through grand gestures; it grows through small, steady acts of kindness, understanding, and affirmation. When mistakes happen, honest apologies and a readiness to try again pave the way for deeper connection. These incremental steps create a foundation for enduring trust and transformation in both spiritual and everyday relationships.
Serving from the other’s frame of reference means continually seeking to understand their needs and responding with care that honors their experience. This daily commitment reflects Christ’s love and opens space for God’s work in transforming hearts and relationships. [47:06]

Zechariah 4:10 (ESV)
“For who has despised the day of small things? For these seven rejoice to see the plumb line in the hand of Zerubbabel.”

Reflection:
What small, consistent action can you commit to today that will build or rebuild trust in a relationship that matters to you?

Quotes

If we want to be like Jesus, if we want to serve people, if we want to serve God, if we want to serve humanity, we must understand what it means to be servant. So we've been talking about that. And we said servant is something that takes time. It doesn't come automatically just because we declare ourselves to be servant. We become servant when other people begin to think of us as being and effectively serving them. So servanthood is really a pilgrimage. It's a journey. And we must understand that. [00:00:28]

It became evident that the first characteristic of a servant was somebody who welcomed you into their presence. It makes sense, doesn't it? You meet somebody, they smile, they invite you to do something, they want to have a cup of coffee with you or tea. Eventually, maybe you're invited into their home. They're welcoming you. There's an embrace here, a sense of let's be together. But also, in that atmosphere, you find yourself wonderfully relaxed. You find yourself feeling emotionally secure. [00:01:33]

Some of our most painful memories come when we have been rejected by people that we care about, friends and so on. And so acceptance is the ability to communicate that you value the relationship. You hold the other person in high regard. You give them a sense of worth and value. And we found that the way or the reason that we do this is because every human being is created in the image of God. [00:02:33]

And every human contact that we have with another person either nudges them towards an eternal corruption and horror, according to C .S. Lewis, or it nudges them towards an eternal splendor, eternal splendor and glory. And so we want to be the kind of individuals that encourage the the influence that we to the end of life of God to this world to have. And so we can't do that. development of the image of God that affirms them, that builds them up and moves them closer towards a God -likeness. [00:03:04]

Trust, in the definition that I've given it here, and as the people, various people in the world have talked about it, is the ability to build confidence in the relationship. I just want to stop there. The word trust is equal to the word confidence. I have confidence that you're not going to hurt me. You have confidence that I'm not going to hurt you, either emotionally or physically. So trust is really a level of confidence that each of us are going to protect the other person, protect their interests, make sure that everything is okay with them. [00:03:39]

So the ability to build confidence in the relationship so that both parties believe the other will not intentionally injure them, but in fact, act in the other's best interests. And there are some biblical concepts here. The concept of community, the concept of fellowship, forgiveness, and reconciliation. We'll talk about the skills in a moment. [00:04:16]

Is what I am doing, is what I am thinking or saying going to build trust with that person or break trust with that person? Whenever there's something important happening, whenever the relationship is starting or in the early stages, it's very important to ask this prior question of trust. Is what I am doing, thinking, saying going to build trust or break trust? But I also have to go a little bit further. Is it going to build trust or break trust with the other person? Because trust is also culturally defined. [00:04:59]

For example, when the monkey took the fish out of water, he thought that was an act of trust. The fish would want to come out of the water. The fish would want to be placed in dry ground. The fish would now think highly of the monkey for taking him out of water, putting him on dry ground. The monkey didn't realize that that would hurt the fish. So in innocence, the monkey tried to build trust, but it actually broke trust. So trust has to be defined in the context of the other person. [00:05:40]

So I failed to ask, what will build trust with my wife? What will build trust with my husband? With my children? With my boss at work? What will build trust with my roommate at school? What will build trust with our neighbors if we want to get to know them? And in that way, we ask the prior question of trust and then try to take their perspective. What will build trust with them? [00:06:40]

and so then there was a bit of silence because I thought he should say something and he did he says I was interested in what you were saying about trust I says really what were you what were you thinking says well says I realized that I'm going to be graduating from university in another three months four months something like that and I have never really gotten to know my father we've lived in the same house we have you know come and gone and said hi and goodbye but we've never really had much conversation my father's a quiet person he's not a bad person at all he's quite a nice person actually but he's quiet and so we've never had any serious conversations and I'm realizing that there's a good chance that when I graduate I'm going to move away and I won't even know my father he says I don't even know quite how to talk to my father but he says I would like to start a better conversation with him in other words how do I build trust with my father in such a way that we can talk about serious things things that should be part of a father -son relationship so I said to him what do you think would build trust with your father to kind of open up the door for conversation interestingly smart fellow but he couldn't think of anything so I gave him some help I said what does your father like to do when he's enjoying himself what does he like to do and he says oh he's by himself he's alone in a room and he's working with wood he loves to make things with wood and I says okay have you seen any wood around here that you particularly like and he says well yes he says I've gotten to look for wood because I know my father likes it and so I've just been attentive to it he says there's some really beautiful pieces of wood you can see it all over here well I grew up my grandfather was a lover of wood as well made things I love oak and walnut and those beautiful woods and so I was right in tune with what he was saying and I said what if you were to take a nice slab of wood that your father could put in something he was making and it would sort of be the nice centerpiece because of its beautiful grain and color you [00:07:54]

if you were to send that to him how would he interpret that you know he would really like that i think that he would really like that and he would find a place for it maybe he would even make something for me as i graduate from university and maybe it would be his gift back to me that would be great and he did now i never saw him again so i don't know what happens but you see what are the things that we can do from the other person's frame of reference that will touch them that will say oh that was a wonderful thing that you did that was very meaningful to me thank you so much and now that the relationship is made stronger trust is culturally defined it's not only defined just within a family it's also culturally defined [00:10:32]

and i want to pick up on your your hypothesis there because it really is a good one because often americans entertain at such a level that the local people can't match it so they feel shamed and then they don't know what to do so that would be a good possibility but it's it's not actually the explanation for this situation but it does explain a number of other situations in this case um kenya came out of a colonialistic history the british ruled kenya for a number of years and during the british rule the british would periodically two or three times a year invite the kenyan employees or the kenyan families in their community in and have a nice pleasant evening but the kenyans always knew that that was just a kind of a pleasant thing to do that the british never did want friendship they just wanted to show that they were nice people and we we get together and we have a nice time but don't think that this is going to be friendship so it was in the minds of the kenyans that if you have to set up a time a place what you're going to eat and what you're going to do that that's a form that's a formal situation it's not a friendship situation so when this kenyan couple heard all of this they thought well they're just like the british they want us to come and have a nice time but nothing really is going on if you want to build a friendship in kenya you don't set up a time and a place and an agenda and have everything all organized in advance you just pop in so now i'm switching to zambia okay because here the africans would pop in the zambians would pop in and the missionaries and they would often come after work well after work was about dinner hour in the evening so on the way home they would pop in just to have some chat if you got invited in for dinner all the better so in fact you would never go to an african place and not be involved [00:14:51]

And the Zambian says, well, I really don't know. I just was stopping by to say hello, popping in, and see if everything's off. Oh, everything is fine here. Thank you very much. And the door closes, you see. Now, the Zambian was intending friendship. The missionary, by African standards, was rude, and now the door to friendship was closed. When Muriel and I were talking about this in Zambia, people all over the audience were all of a sudden realizing that they had been misinterpreting the other group, and now they knew how to interpret. [00:17:36]

How do you build trust? It's culturally defined. And therefore, we have to ask, what will build trust with this person in their context? Let me give an illustration. By the way, trust is also fragile. It is broken quickly. So that after one or two times of coming to the door and not being invited in, or having this formal evening together, but not doing it in the right way, people tend to say, okay, well, there's no trust here. There's no relationship. There's no potential for friendship. So trust is fragile. [00:18:42]

When we break trust, then we go and we say, you know, I am so sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing. I had good intentions, but I was the monkey. I didn't know what was happening. And, you know, could we start over again? Because we were just not very well informed. We didn't know these things. We did some foolish things. We did what normal Americans would do. And so can we start? So they're asking the forgiveness, the coming and saying, I'm sorry, this was my fault. Can we manage it better next time. [00:19:31]

I found that most of the people in the world are very forgiving people. They want friendships as badly as any of us want friendships. They don't want tension. They don't want anxiety. They don't want friction. They don't want alienation. They do enjoy the peace of a good friendship. [00:20:04]

We all have a view of other people or other groups of people. It's often unconscious. But with Snoopy, Charles Schultz, who's actually an evangelical Christian, Schultz, the author of Snoopy, tells us what's going on in Snoopy's mind. But actually, for most of it, it's at the unconscious level. When I was doing my workshops and conferences with Russian universities, one of the things that we found towards the end of the conference, and during the time we would almost always finish with a nice banquet, we found that the Russians were always afraid that the Americans were going to bomb them and invade Russia. [00:22:16]

And so we were fearing each other, but what we found is in these conferences that we were actually very much alike. We were very human. We just wanted peace. We wanted to be with our families. We wanted to raise our children. We wanted to enjoy our grandchildren. But at the same time, we had this perception that the Russian bear or the American aggressors or things of that sort. So we had a stereotype of what the Russian person was like. Not an accurate one, we found out, but it was there. [00:23:18]

There's a proverb that has helped me a lot. Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly the first time. So if it's worth doing, try to do it as best you can. But even if it doesn't work, if it's worth it, then you go back and you do it better. You do it in an improvement. So Snoopy's got some good intentions, good motives. Want to be friends, but the cat is stupid. Snoopy continues to stay in his doghouse. If we're going to be friends, it'll be on my turf, my territory, my place of safety. Okay? [00:24:27]

There's a certain amount of risk when we give ourselves to another relationship. And there's always the risk of injury, disappointment, frustration. things about the challenge. And education and education and education. progress often is not in a straight line but there's potholes and difficulties along the way. What other observations do you make? [00:25:53]

Yeah, so Snoopy's sending to at least two different messages here. One is friendship and it's time to forget our differences but the other message is I don't trust you at all. In fact I might even, you know, be a, the cat might have interpreted threat. So there's the words and then there's the nonverbal communication that's going on and the cat looks at the nonverbal communication and realizes that may be the real message that's coming here. Igor. [00:26:44]

you're giving Snoopy a wonderful credit and that's it's altogether possible that that would be the case with Snoopy this Snoopy and the cat have had a history together Snoopy has existed I think for maybe 25 years or so and there are whole big books you know Snoopy cartoons so so there is a history here we all bring a history into a situation so when I came into Durban South Africa and began to teach at the college I I didn't start out with a blank sheet there were a number of other Americans that had been there before me and some Canadians as well so when they saw me they saw me in light of the history of all the other people if there were good people that were there they would say oh we have another good person if there were some that were not so good they say well we don't know or maybe not most of them not so good but I don't think that was the case but then they would say oh we've got another American here how sheesh you know that kind of thing so we don't we never come into a situation without a history it just doesn't exist [00:29:37]

he could have gone back and said Snoopy you were thinking the cat was stupid from the beginning what was in what was the matter with you could you're still on top of your doghouse your nose is in the air you have this you know it's a holiday season you know that you can't just legislate friendship because it's a day on a calendar he could have said all of those things but those were peripheral things and the mediator gets to the core what's the in the case of Joshua 22 last session what does this altar mean that was the issue exactly what was your intention and so he goes back to Snoopy's intentions and motivations and they were good they were beautiful they were the right ones now Snoopy is laying down all of a sudden what does that mean he probably emotionally exhausted but also I think that perhaps he's given up it's a sign that I've done everything I can whatever happens now is the cat's thing but notice on what paw is the glove and what pod you see here and in what condition is the paw it's not injured right okay so and maybe this is stretching it all right I'll confess to that but the cat attacked the barrier to trust he didn't attack the person whether Schultz intended that I don't know but Snoopy goes back and says I offered in the right hand of fellowship and he almost tore it off so when we feel injured [00:34:14]

Rightly or wrongly, but when we feel injured, we think about it, we talk about it. Somebody has to be the object of our conversation. They have to know that we tried and we were injured and so on. As irrational as some of it might seem, generally speaking, we have to talk with somebody about our pain, our rejection, even though we may have been quite responsible for it. So here's the role of the mediator. What was your intention? What's the core issue here? Now, the second role of the mediator is captured in this third frame. [00:35:54]

Let's look at this through the perspective of the cat for a moment. Maybe the cat thinks this way, but you see the maybe softens it. Is that a possibility? And so Linus is just absolutely brilliant. Schultz is brilliant here in this character of Linus in how he handles this difficulty now of probably trust being broken on both parties' side. Snoopy feels that the cat blew it. The cat feels that Snoopy blew the opportunity. [00:37:20]

quickly agrees but now see now we're ready for an alternative we did it we did it poorly can we do it better but now I think you should try it again I think you should offer the cat next door your right hand of fellowship but without the hockey glove and he looks up and says what are you doing Snoopy says I'm having a farewell dinner for my hand so Snoopy is he's ready we got to give him a lot of credit he's willing to take the advice of his friend Linus but he's pretty sure it's not going to turn out any better and of course dogs always like to have something to eat but this is his farewell dinner so here's Linus now a word of affirmation there's something in encouragement there's something in affirmation apparently the pituitary gland in our in our human body releases certain kinds of chemicals when we hear encouragement and affirmation and when people say something good about us that just gives us a sense of calm a sense of yes this this this makes me feel good this makes me happy I feel better and so without probably without knowing that Linus affirms it's always good to affirm people because it puts them in a position that maybe now they're willing to take some advice now they're willing to listen to wisdom now they're willing to consider what maybe they should do better affirmation is so powerful and so he tells Snoopy what he thinks he ought to do but notice again just as he used the word maybe up here notice I think I think this would be my opinion but you have to decide when you say you should that's your decision and the person can then blame you but when you say here's what I would do or here's what I think you might consider then the decision still rests with them and they take ownership of their actions they take ownership of this this situation and so Linus to me is just this wonderful wise fellow he's he's often reading books philosophy books so now he finally comes through is this wise person all right now we're getting close [00:38:50]

So Schultz is actually sending a message to American culture here. This is not a cat and dog story. This is a story about people who are different, people who have alienated themselves somehow for some reasons. And now he wants to make his contribution to our American culture, that we can be more friendly, we can be more trust -building. [00:43:36]

Trust is usually built in small, incremental steps over time. And if trust gets broken somewhere, it's important for one or both parties to say, you know, I'm sorry, I just didn't intend for that to happen, but I wasn't thinking very clearly. I made a mistake. Can we continue? You know, can we continue to value and develop the relationship? So Schultz is saying that, yes, in small ways, strong relationships are built. [00:47:22]

93 % of all the people who come to Christ come on the basis of a trust relationship. So if somebody comes to a Billy Graham Crusade, it's not like they lead them to Christ, but they go because somebody that they trust takes them. If they come to Christ in a church service, somebody takes them there that they trust. And so trust is so important. [00:48:29]

But you see, if you don't know the other person's frame of reference, if you don't know their context, what will build trust from this person's frame of reference? You see, so when this person is finally done, it's going to be a mixed blessing, okay? Yes, maybe we can escape, but how will I escape because I have no legs now, kind of thing. So the point here is that what will build trust from the other person's frame of reference. And in trying to help, sometimes we do severe damage. So even help to serve must be serving, helping from the other person's frame of reference, okay? [00:49:45]

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Transcript
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