Building Strong Families Through Love and Legacy
Summary
### Summary
In this second week of our series "FAM," we delve into the significance of family in our lives, encompassing our nuclear, extended, and church families. We began by reflecting on Proverbs, where Solomon emphasizes that wisdom and understanding are essential for building strong families. This wisdom is not merely academic but a divine insight that helps us navigate the complexities of family life.
I shared personal anecdotes about how time seems to slip through our fingers, highlighting the emotional journey of watching old family videos and the realization of how quickly our children grow up. This led to a discussion on the importance of holding onto unchanging principles in a constantly evolving world.
We explored four unchanging rules for families, starting with the need for high touch. Despite the awkward connotations the word "touch" might have today, appropriate physical affection is crucial for conveying love and acceptance. Secondly, our families need our time. Quality time cannot be planned; it happens in spontaneous, unplanned moments that create lasting memories. Thirdly, our words should be a source of blessing and encouragement. Words have the power to build up or tear down, and we should strive to speak life into our family members. Lastly, godly families think beyond the present and aim to leave a lasting inheritance, not just financially but also in terms of an honorable name and a spiritual legacy.
We concluded with a call to pray the promises of God over our families, emphasizing that while we may not be perfect parents, we can be praying parents. This spiritual inheritance is the most valuable legacy we can leave for our children, ensuring that they grow up knowing and following God's will for their lives.
### Key Takeaways
1. High Touch in Families: Appropriate physical affection is essential for conveying love, acceptance, and affirmation. Despite cultural shifts that may make the word "touch" seem awkward, it remains a powerful way to connect with our family members. Jesus demonstrated the importance of touch in His ministry, healing and blessing those who came to Him through physical contact. [11:15]
2. The Value of Time: Time is our most precious commodity, more valuable than money. Quality time with family often happens in unplanned, spontaneous moments. Jesus exemplified this by giving His time to children, despite His busy schedule, showing that true love is spelled T-I-M-E. [14:16]
3. Power of Words: Our words have the power to build up or tear down. Jesus blessed the children with His words, and God the Father affirmed Jesus at His baptism with words of identity, affection, and affirmation. We should strive to speak life-giving words to our family members, creating a positive and encouraging environment. [18:01]
4. Leaving a Lasting Inheritance: A good person leaves an inheritance for their children's children, which includes financial stability, an honorable name, and a spiritual legacy. Thinking in terms of legacy helps us make decisions that will benefit future generations, ensuring that our values and faith are passed down. [20:25]
5. Praying the Promises of God: While we may not be perfect parents, we can be praying parents. Praying the promises of God over our children ensures that they grow up knowing and following God's will for their lives. The words we pray become prophecies for the future, as God, the promise giver, is also the promise keeper. [24:25]
### YouTube Chapters
[0:00] - Welcome
[00:27] - Introduction to FAM Series
[00:58] - Importance of Wisdom in Family
[01:34] - Personal Anecdotes on Time
[07:00] - Changing Rules Over Time
[08:08] - Jesus and the Children
[09:18] - High Touch in Families
[13:15] - The Value of Time
[16:49] - Power of Words
[20:25] - Leaving a Lasting Inheritance
[24:25] - Praying the Promises of God
[27:08] - Prayer for Families
[28:18] - Invitation to Join God's Family
[29:20] - Closing Prayer and Celebration
Study Guide
### Bible Study Discussion Guide
#### Bible Reading
1. Proverbs 24:3-4: "By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures."
2. Mark 10:13-16: "People were bringing little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, 'Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.' And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them."
3. Proverbs 18:21: "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit."
#### Observation Questions
1. According to Proverbs 24:3-4, what are the essential elements for building and establishing a strong family?
2. In Mark 10:13-16, how did Jesus respond to the disciples when they tried to prevent the children from coming to Him? What does this tell us about Jesus' priorities? [08:08]
3. What does Proverbs 18:21 say about the power of our words? How does this align with the sermon’s emphasis on speaking life-giving words to our family members? [16:49]
4. The sermon mentioned the importance of "high touch" in families. How did Jesus demonstrate the significance of touch in His ministry? [11:15]
#### Interpretation Questions
1. Why does Solomon emphasize wisdom and understanding as crucial for building a strong family in Proverbs 24:3-4? How can this wisdom be applied in modern family life?
2. Jesus' interaction with the children in Mark 10:13-16 shows His value for them. What does this teach us about the importance of giving our time to family members, especially children? [14:16]
3. Proverbs 18:21 highlights the power of words. How can this understanding change the way we communicate within our families? What are some practical ways to ensure our words are life-giving? [16:49]
4. The sermon discussed leaving a lasting inheritance, not just financially but also spiritually. How does this concept of inheritance shape the way we live and make decisions today? [20:25]
#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on your family dynamics. How can you incorporate more appropriate physical affection to convey love and acceptance? What are some specific actions you can take this week to show affection to your family members? [11:15]
2. Time is our most precious commodity. What are some ways you can prioritize spending quality, unplanned time with your family? Share a recent experience where an unplanned moment turned into a meaningful memory. [14:16]
3. Think about the words you use with your family. Are they more often life-giving or critical? What steps can you take to ensure your words build up rather than tear down? Consider setting a goal for the ratio of positive to negative comments you make. [16:49]
4. Consider the legacy you are leaving for your children or future generations. What are some practical steps you can take to ensure you leave a financial, honorable, and spiritual inheritance? How can you start implementing these steps today? [20:25]
5. The sermon emphasized the importance of praying the promises of God over our families. What specific promises from Scripture can you start praying over your family members? How can you make this a regular practice? [24:25]
6. Reflect on the concept of being a praying parent rather than a perfect parent. How can this shift in perspective change the way you approach parenting or family relationships? What specific prayers can you start incorporating into your daily routine? [24:25]
7. The sermon mentioned the importance of thinking beyond the present and aiming to leave a lasting inheritance. How can you start making decisions today that will benefit future generations? What changes in your lifestyle or priorities might this require? [20:25]
Devotional
Day 1: The Power of Appropriate Physical Affection
Description: Appropriate physical affection is essential for conveying love, acceptance, and affirmation within families. Despite cultural shifts that may make the word "touch" seem awkward, it remains a powerful way to connect with our family members. Jesus demonstrated the importance of touch in His ministry, healing and blessing those who came to Him through physical contact. In a world where digital interactions often replace face-to-face connections, the simple act of a hug, a pat on the back, or holding hands can communicate volumes of love and support.
In our families, we should strive to create an environment where appropriate physical affection is a natural and welcomed expression of our love. This not only strengthens the bonds between family members but also provides a sense of security and belonging. By following Jesus' example, we can use touch to heal, comfort, and bless those we love. [11:15]
1 Thessalonians 2:7-8 (ESV): "But we were gentle among you, like a nursing mother taking care of her own children. So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us."
Reflection: Think about a family member who might need a physical expression of your love today. How can you show them affection in a way that makes them feel valued and loved?
Day 2: The Value of Time
Description: Time is our most precious commodity, more valuable than money. Quality time with family often happens in unplanned, spontaneous moments. Jesus exemplified this by giving His time to children, despite His busy schedule, showing that true love is spelled T-I-M-E. In our fast-paced world, it's easy to get caught up in our responsibilities and overlook the importance of spending quality time with our loved ones.
However, these unplanned moments of connection are what create lasting memories and strengthen family bonds. By being present and available, we show our family members that they are a priority in our lives. This means putting away distractions, listening actively, and engaging in activities that foster connection and joy. [14:16]
Ecclesiastes 3:1-2 (ESV): "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted."
Reflection: Reflect on your daily schedule. Are there moments where you can be more present with your family? What spontaneous activity can you plan today to spend quality time with them?
Day 3: The Power of Words
Description: Our words have the power to build up or tear down. Jesus blessed the children with His words, and God the Father affirmed Jesus at His baptism with words of identity, affection, and affirmation. We should strive to speak life-giving words to our family members, creating a positive and encouraging environment. Words can heal wounds, inspire dreams, and strengthen relationships.
In our families, it's important to be mindful of how we speak to one another. Encouraging words, affirmations, and expressions of love can uplift and motivate our loved ones. Conversely, harsh or critical words can cause lasting damage. By choosing to speak words of blessing and encouragement, we can create a home environment where everyone feels valued and supported. [18:01]
Proverbs 16:24 (ESV): "Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body."
Reflection: Think about the words you use with your family. Are they uplifting and encouraging? How can you intentionally speak words of blessing to a family member today?
Day 4: Leaving a Lasting Inheritance
Description: A good person leaves an inheritance for their children's children, which includes financial stability, an honorable name, and a spiritual legacy. Thinking in terms of legacy helps us make decisions that will benefit future generations, ensuring that our values and faith are passed down. It's not just about leaving material wealth but also imparting wisdom, values, and a strong spiritual foundation.
By living with a legacy mindset, we can make choices that reflect our commitment to our family's future well-being. This includes teaching our children about financial responsibility, modeling integrity and honor, and nurturing their spiritual growth. Our goal should be to leave a lasting impact that will benefit not only our children but also future generations. [20:25]
Proverbs 13:22 (ESV): "A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children, but the sinner's wealth is laid up for the righteous."
Reflection: Consider the legacy you are building for your family. What steps can you take today to ensure you are leaving a positive and lasting inheritance for future generations?
Day 5: Praying the Promises of God
Description: While we may not be perfect parents, we can be praying parents. Praying the promises of God over our children ensures that they grow up knowing and following God's will for their lives. The words we pray become prophecies for the future, as God, the promise giver, is also the promise keeper. Prayer is a powerful tool that can shape the destiny of our families and align our hearts with God's purposes.
By consistently praying for our family members, we invite God's presence and guidance into their lives. This spiritual inheritance is the most valuable legacy we can leave for our children, providing them with a foundation of faith and trust in God's promises. [24:25]
Jeremiah 29:12-13 (ESV): "Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart."
Reflection: Reflect on the promises of God that you want to pray over your family. How can you incorporate regular prayer into your daily routine to cover your loved ones in God's blessings and guidance?
Quotes
### Quotes for Outreach
1. "In a world that is ever-changing, we must hold onto that which never changes. What are the things in our families that never change? And so today, I want to look at four unchanging rules for families, and here's what I want to do. I want to encourage us to live a little bit more like Jesus, and to give them a chance to live a little bit more like Jesus." [07:33] (17 seconds)
2. "Time is actually your most precious commodity. Not money. You can always get more money. You can never replace the time you have. I want you to see it in Jesus. Life in Jesus. We read it earlier, Mark chapter 10, verse 13. People were bringing their little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them. But the disciples rebuked them. Don't you know how busy this guy is? Don't you know how important he is? People want to meet with him. Keep your kids away. And what does Jesus say? No, no, no. Let them, let them be with me." [14:16] (31 seconds)
3. "Our words build up or they tear down. I'll be honest with you on this one. I mess up in this one sometimes. There are times when I can be tired, where I can be busy, where I can be frazzled, where my kids or even my wife catch me at the wrong moment and I use my words in a sharp way and it's done. It's devastating to them. We need to think about what comes out of our mouth. The words we say give life or death." [17:23] (24 seconds)
4. "A good person leaves an inheritance for their children's children. I think there's three different kinds of inheritance he's talking about. Let me show you them. First one is a financial inheritance. Some of you read this and you're like, well, I'm out. Some people die and they leave wills. I'm dying and I'm leaving bills. Come on, anybody else feel that? Whew, that touched a nerve. Okay." [20:25] (22 seconds)
5. "You'll never be a perfect parent, but you can be a praying parent. What should you pray over your family? Ready? Pray the promises of God. Speak them as though they are. Pray the promises of God and trust that God, the promise giver, will also be God, the promise keeper." [24:25] (21 seconds)
### Quotes for Members
1. "I really believe that as more and more families walk through brokenness, the church should rise up as families that are strong and unified together. In fact, my prayer for some of you in this series is that there will be people in your life, people you work out with, people that are at your job, people that you know through your kid's school, that say about you, I don't even know if I believe all that they believe, but I want what they have because they see that there's something different in you and in me." [00:58] (26 seconds)
2. "One of the funny things is your kids get a little older in home is that as they age, their need for touch never decreases. In fact, it actually probably increases. But the older they get, the weirder it tends to get. Like, my wife and I have two sons, and then we have a younger daughter. And our sons, when they were little, it was so much fun. We'd hug, we'd cuddle, we'd wrestle, I'd give them a kiss on the cheek. We had fun. Now that they're a little older, like, it would kill my children if I pulled them in and gave them a kiss on the cheek. It would literally kill them. They would literally just die of embarrassment in the moment." [12:14] (29 seconds)
3. "I want you to see this. This word healed in the Greek language, original language, is found something like 39 or 40 times in the New Testament. 20 of them refer to Jesus touching a person or a person touching Jesus. And in every instant, the person was healed. There's something powerful about learning how to give proper affectionate touch in our homes." [13:15] (19 seconds)
4. "I want you to hear something about me. I need you to understand. A lot of churches will praise moms on Mother's Day and beat dads up on Father's Day. So it's Mother's Day and it's like, oh, you're the greatest thing ever. And dads, you're the worst thing to ever exist. You're the scum of the earth, try harder. That is not how I roll, okay? Are you with me on this? I don't roll like this. But I do wanna say something sharp to the dads in the room." [15:48] (21 seconds)
5. "I believe the words we pray become prophecies we will see in the future. Why? Because God, the promise giver, is always God, the promise keeper. If I had another 30 minutes, I would walk you through a bunch of other promises of God. If you don't follow me on Instagram, pull your phone out right now, follow at IamJasonBurns, because literally, after the last service, I posted a list of the promises of God that you can pray over your children. Take a screenshot, save it, and let's be people who pray the promises of God over our children." [25:31] (31 seconds)